What questions should a Dom/Master ask of a sub/slave they might consider?

What questions should a Dom/Master ask of a sub/slave they might consider? (Full Version)

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SirEbonyDlite -> What questions should a Dom/Master ask of a sub/slave they might consider? (12/26/2005 11:48:55 AM)
I have a query for all the experienced Doms/Masters: What questions should a Dom/Master ask of a potential submissive/slave they might consider? Should they ask them about their job, if they have children, limits in the lifestyle, etc.? Any sound, constructive and POSITIVE advice is welcomed. Thanks!

LuckyAlbatross -> RE: What questions should a Dom/Master ask of a sub/slave they might consider? (12/26/2005 12:57:59 PM)
The same things any person would ask any other person if they wanted to form a relationship with them. Even more importantly is taking the time to get to know them and see how they ACTUALLY operate in life and where they ACTUALLY see their life going.

Focus50 -> RE: What questions should a Dom/Master ask of a sub/slave they might consider? (12/26/2005 1:53:33 PM)
You should start by asking yourself what you're looking for.... Your examples suggest at least 2 separate types.... So, are you looking for a full relationship founded on on a D/s dynamic or are you looking for a "piece of meat" where limits are a priority issue? A relationship means things like job and kids as well as connecting all have to be considered. And assuming you've had vanilla relationships, you should already know what to ask. Personally, I think this is the easier path to travel as most of us have some experience at communicating with another human-being with mutual interest and attraction. If you wanna go down the "hard limits" path, then you'll probably have some experience with a "something on the side" kinda relationship that may or may not involve honesty with each other. So I suspect you know what to ask as it really depends on what you seek - human or meat? No matter which, I'd strongly suggest being honest with any potential you contact.... Focus.

willing2serve -> RE: What questions should a Dom/Master ask of a sub/slave they might consider? (12/26/2005 2:52:31 PM)
quote: What questions should a Dom/Master ask of a potential submissive/slave they might consider? Should they ask them about their job, if they have children, limits in the lifestyle, etc.? I agree all of the normal compatibility relationship questions, but also let me throw out some food for thought. It is my belief that you must be compatible on the maturity of your D/s journey. When i first got into the lifestyle i was a bratty "make me do it" sub, if i had met my Master during those times, we would not have been compatible at all. Even though our relationship compatibility status is the same. I had a Dom attorney for 2 years, our lives paralleled beautifully. Except, I was growing and maturing and needed control. He was capable of being a very effective Dom; however circumstances were not right for him to take on this responsibility. We still remain wonderful friends. But again, lifestyle maturity and goals should be very similar for the consideration to even begin in addition to the day-to-day compatibilities. IMHO, you may want to gear some questions about maturity and goals in the lifestyle. Respectfully, BTs willing

IrishMist -> RE: What questions should a Dom/Master ask of a sub/slave they might consider? (12/26/2005 4:54:27 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: SirEbonyDlite I have a query for all the experienced Doms/Masters: What questions should a Dom/Master ask of a potential submissive/slave they might consider? Should they ask them about their job, if they have children, limits in the lifestyle, etc.? Any sound, constructive and POSITIVE advice is welcomed. Thanks! Hmmm...I would expect any potential Dom/Master to ask me the general questions. Such as: how many hours do I work, do I have little ones, how do I fit my schedule around them, etc, etc. If they did not, then how would they understand if I had to suddenly cancel for some reason relating to this.

OscarHargraves -> RE: What questions should a Dom/Master ask of a sub/slave they might consider? (12/26/2005 8:08:38 PM)
Why not make a list of what's important to YOU? From that list formulate a reasonable set of questions that you can ask without sounding like a member of the Inquisition. Be prepared to ANSER these questions (and more) about yourself to the person you are taliking too. One of my first questions to a prospective Sub is: "What are you looking for and what would you want to receive from a relationship with me?" Make it a point to listen carefully to the answers and try not to be too judgmental until you know why they say things. Also be sure there aren't going to be any immediate problems that can't be solved (like one person who smokes and the other can't stand the smell of smoking). Be very forthright and honest when you answer questions and don't lie. If there is going to be a problem, this is the time to find it.

bloodredrose -> RE: What questions should a Dom/Master ask of a sub/slave they might consider? (12/26/2005 10:07:09 PM)
I agree totally with the above advice...especially given my encounter this summer with a Dom who was aware from my profile that i sought a one-on-one permanent relationship for which i was willing to relocate overseas,and who omitted to tell me that he was actually married!Honesty is KEY above everything else,and if you don't show this respect then a relationship is sinply not workable, IMHO.

millisande -> RE: What questions should a Dom/Master ask of a sub/slave they might consider? (12/27/2005 2:29:23 AM)
In addition to all of the above, it would also be helpful if you made sure that you understood what the potential sub was actually saying, as opposed to simply hearing the words they speak.... i have watched numerous relationships go down the hole, only to find out later that it was all an issue of semantics. Just my humble $0.02. Respectfully, adrianne

amayos -> RE: What questions should a Dom/Master ask of a sub/slave they might consider? (12/27/2005 3:34:14 PM)
I make certain I'm speaking with an authentic submissive by a series of questions regarding their visions and ideals and open-mindedness. Outside of this, I am often concerned with interactive compatibility. For example, I like slapping and having my feet kissed and worshipped. If a prospective has trouble with these things, chances are she's not going to add to my happiness. I am quite up front about what their intended place in my life will be, and if that's a problem, ciao. Basic questions of compatibility help, too. Namely, what type of music / art / literature / future dreams / lifestyle (and so on) does she favor, and does it jive with you? A lot of questions can be answered before the phone call by simply looking at a girl's profile. Does it click with you? I've spared myself from hours of "getting to know you" conversation by simply taking the time to read profile data and notice the one who just contacted me is looking for nothing more than an over glorified husband. No, thanks.

fastlane -> RE: What questions should a Dom/Master ask of a sub/slave they might consider? (12/27/2005 4:50:16 PM)
Two questions. Are you poor? Are you rich?

krikket -> RE: What questions should a Dom/Master ask of a sub/slave they might consider? (12/27/2005 5:32:32 PM)
i think they should ask each other those (and other) questions. Given today's medical and political environment not to be as open as we can with each other can be just down right dangerous -- mentally, emotionally, economicly and physically.

Petruchio -> RE: What questions should a Dom/Master ask of a sub/slave they might consider? (12/29/2005 2:50:14 AM)
quote: Two questions. Are you poor? Are you rich? Such borderline questions tell more about the questioner than the respondent.

Nendarye -> RE: What questions should a Dom/Master ask of a sub/slave they might consider? (12/29/2005 8:53:10 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: SirEbonyDlite I have a query for all the experienced Doms/Masters: What questions should a Dom/Master ask of a potential submissive/slave they might consider? Should they ask them about their job, if they have children, limits in the lifestyle, etc.? Any sound, constructive and POSITIVE advice is welcomed. Thanks! Though I was introduced to Master through friends, he took a very heavy interest in my life. He asked me about my past, my family, friends, my kids, my job...how I felt about each and every one of them, he asked me about my hobbies and interests, and why I liked each of them. He went out of his way to integrate himself in MY life so that he could understand me more, and my desires, wants, and needs.

MasterLark -> RE: What questions should a Dom/Master ask of a sub/slave they might consider? (12/29/2005 9:17:10 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: SirEbonyDlite I have a query for all the experienced Doms/Masters: What questions should a Dom/Master ask of a potential submissive/slave they might consider? Should they ask them about their job, if they have children, limits in the lifestyle, etc.? Any sound, constructive and POSITIVE advice is welcomed. Thanks! Many many many questions. To dominate you must know (her) better than she knows herself. Ask many health history questions -- that is the beginning of playing safe. her profile and every response is a source of more questions. The questions never stop.

Sartoris32801 -> RE: What questions should a Dom/Master ask of a sub/slave they might consider? (12/29/2005 9:30:50 AM)
Can she make good bragiole Does she appreciate and understand the perfection of 90 feet to first base? Can she swing dance? East & West Coast Swing! Does she play cello, naked? Sartoris

KatyLied -> RE: What questions should a Dom/Master ask of a sub/slave they might consider? (12/29/2005 9:37:19 AM)
quote: Does she play cello, naked? You are really narrowing the field with that one! [;)]

Sartoris32801 -> RE: What questions should a Dom/Master ask of a sub/slave they might consider? (12/29/2005 10:04:53 AM)
3 out of 4 ain't bad! Sartoris

Aileen68 -> RE: What questions should a Dom/Master ask of a sub/slave they might consider? (12/29/2005 10:11:07 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Sartoris32801 Can she make good bragiole Sartoris Oh...I haven't had really good bragiole in years. Damn you! Now I have such a craving.

Sartoris32801 -> RE: What questions should a Dom/Master ask of a sub/slave they might consider? (12/29/2005 10:13:25 AM)
Aileen, How's it feel to want? [;)] Sartoris

Aileen68 -> RE: What questions should a Dom/Master ask of a sub/slave they might consider? (12/29/2005 10:21:59 AM)
Wanting puts me on a mission. Little Italy here I come! It's so delicious when a craving is perfectly satisfied, isn't it! And of course I'm not talking food. :)

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