hitting the reset button (Full Version)

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softness -> hitting the reset button (12/6/2008 5:23:13 AM)

I find that sometimes  I just need to hit the reset button, find the floor again and build upwards on a solid foundation.

I have found that sometimes this can be done through BDSM ... perhaps a really hard cathartic scene, perhaps being able to entre a high protocol situation where I merely need to operate and not have to think ... even an incarceration can manage this.

Have you ever used to BDSM as a tool to regroup and hit your reset button? If so how? .. and did it work? If not ... how do you hit your reset?



LaTigresse -> RE: hitting the reset button (12/6/2008 5:32:46 AM)

I have always been really connected to nature. If I get out of kilter I know I need something like a hike by myself, or some time with the horses. Even in the winter I will go out at night and stand very still, listening and taking in whatever nature is showing me. Sometimes it's snowing big fat flakes, sometimes it is bitter cold and the stars are so numerous and bright it takes my breath away. Other times I can hear the coyotes and owls, maybe even see them in the moonlight, or watching the deer stroll through ignoring my presense. Even gardening or repotting house plants can do in a pinch.

If I am off kilter, I don't want to interact with others and subject them to my mood. I need to feel calm and centred to play.



Christinestill -> RE: hitting the reset button (12/6/2008 5:39:13 AM)

i'm in the process of hitting my reset button, but not through bdsm.  i'm selling almost everything i own and moving across the country.  i have no family there and the few people i know are from CM.  i'm literally starting from the ground floor up with everything, job, apt., car, furniture.  it's terrifying but exciting at the same time. 

it's a new beginning both physically and more important mentally.  i need this and i'm glad i'm not letting my fears get in the way of what i need for once in my life.



utopicus -> RE: hitting the reset button (12/6/2008 10:42:48 AM)

I've hit the reset button all right, for I realised that it's only through this lifestyle I can grow and reach my potential. The process so far has been terribly difficult, with many ups and downs, but eventually it came to my senses.



LadyHibiscus -> RE: hitting the reset button (12/6/2008 1:19:39 PM)

I wish BDSM would work for me as a reset. 



IvyMorgan -> RE: hitting the reset button (12/6/2008 1:29:13 PM)

It depends what sort of reset I need..

I've been known to use heavy pain/canes to wind up crying myself to calm again.

Sometimes I curl up somewhere warm and safe and shut down for a while.  (It's a bit like there is a switch in my head, I lose a bunch of time and wake up feeling a whole lot more human.)

Hot baths can work too.

Or washing my hair.

Or singing.



oceanwynds -> RE: hitting the reset button (12/6/2008 1:31:10 PM)

BDSM is great for hitting the reset button when it comes to discipline. I tend to be a dreamer, and can become ungrounded and fuzzy at times with things I need to do.

There are other things that I also use for reseting the button that doesn't include BDSM. Guided visualizations, being outdoors, working with my hands and prayer are a few.

oceanwynds



kiwisub12 -> RE: hitting the reset button (12/6/2008 1:55:20 PM)

Mental reset , for me is release of stress and anxiety, and is easily done with a heavy cane and a great beating.      Or even a good beating.  The relaxation lasts for at least 24 hours, and enables me to regroup, and reorganise.


and Christine - i understand where you are coming from - i did it at 21, from NZ to USA - knowing no-one. It is as scarey as hell, and also liberating.  Good luck with your move. You have courage!!!!



CreativeDominant -> RE: hitting the reset button (12/6/2008 1:59:01 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: softness

I find that sometimes  I just need to hit the reset button, find the floor again and build upwards on a solid foundation.

I have found that sometimes this can be done through BDSM ... perhaps a really hard cathartic scene, perhaps being able to entre a high protocol situation where I merely need to operate and not have to think ... even an incarceration can manage this.

Have you ever used to BDSM as a tool to regroup and hit your reset button? If so how? .. and did it work? If not ... how do you hit your reset?



I have many ways of hitting the "reset" button.  Working on my hot rods...especially when I can be doing bodywork on them or grinding away burrs and rough edges with a grinder...is helpful.  Cleaning while listening to loud music helps.  In BDSM, there is a certain kind of scene that is very helpful for me and I have a submissive friend in Denver who has helped me in the past by being my partner for that kind of scene.  Usually though, I try to stay away from indulging in that kind of scene when the ONLY things motivating me towards that kind of scene are unhealthy, negative things.  Like LaT, I don't feel it is fair to inflict agony on someone when the reason behind it is NOT to bring them pleasure along with the pain or to spend time with them but rather, a selfish way of indulging my own aggravations.



oceanwynds -> RE: hitting the reset button (12/6/2008 2:00:05 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Christinestill

i'm in the process of hitting my reset button, but not through bdsm.  i'm selling almost everything i own and moving across the country.  i have no family there and the few people i know are from CM.  i'm literally starting from the ground floor up with everything, job, apt., car, furniture.  it's terrifying but exciting at the same time. 

it's a new beginning both physically and more important mentally.  i need this and i'm glad i'm not letting my fears get in the way of what i need for once in my life.


Hello Christine

I ended up doing that 3x in my life and have had no regrets. You will be surprise at the inner strength you will discover through this new journey.

Best wishes to you,
oceanwynds



CallaFirestormBW -> RE: hitting the reset button (12/6/2008 2:02:56 PM)

I use body modification (and the pain on the receiving end, or concentration on the giving end) as one of my 'resets'. Sweatlodge is another form of figurative self-flagellation that works very, very well for me.



gypsygrl -> RE: hitting the reset button (12/6/2008 3:10:13 PM)

Reading this, it dawned on me that I haven't really needed a major re-set lately.  How cool is that? :)

But, yeah, the activities associated with bd/sm can work to re-set my internal operating system.  For example, yesterday really sucked.  I'm starting a new job in a field I'm not used to working in.  I started my training monday, and by yesterday I was sooooo happy it was friday (I've never even worked an M-F 8-4 schedule before.  I've always been able to pretty much do what I wanted at work.  I'm learning why they call it work. lol) cause I was out of patience with my fellow trainees and wanted to scream.  When I got home I was so happy to see Sir, that I pretty much just turned it all over to him and went brain dead and let myself regress to a prior stage of development.  I went giddy.  When he saw me, the first thing he did was send me to my room which was perfect and we ended up having a lovely evening.



Lashra -> RE: hitting the reset button (12/6/2008 3:15:36 PM)

For me connecting with the outdoors helps a great deal. My particular favorite is to sit outside during a rain storm, the sound of the rain, but more so the smell of the wet earth seems to calm my mind and center me.

~Lashra



moonvine -> RE: hitting the reset button (12/6/2008 3:23:56 PM)

I need to hit the reset button right now and it sure isn't going to be through BDSM as I don't have a partner and self-flagellation does nothing for me.  So I'm going to have to figure out how.  



kallisto -> RE: hitting the reset button (12/6/2008 4:27:36 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Christinestill

i'm in the process of hitting my reset button, but not through bdsm.  i'm selling almost everything i own and moving across the country.  i have no family there and the few people i know are from CM.  i'm literally starting from the ground floor up with everything, job, apt., car, furniture.  it's terrifying but exciting at the same time. 

it's a new beginning both physically and more important mentally.  i need this and i'm glad i'm not letting my fears get in the way of what i need for once in my life.


Good for you and I wish you the very best [:)]   I've done the exact same thing and it was the absolute best thing I could have done.    I would love to do it again now, but it isn't the right time.  



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