Truthfully - how do I find a playmate (Full Version)

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voxpoet -> Truthfully - how do I find a playmate (12/6/2008 8:33:43 AM)

This is a bit daunting.


Thanks in advance :)

bb



daddysliloneds -> RE: Truthfully - how do I find a playmate (12/6/2008 8:36:36 AM)

you could do what i do, which is be forthright and honest in your approach, which by the way, seems to get me no where...

or you could lie and say you were looking for a relationship and fuck/play/dump everyone you hook up with is how it was for me when i was looking for a relationship...

in other words, i haven't got a clue, so when you find out will you let me know how to go about it?



Rover -> RE: Truthfully - how do I find a playmate (12/6/2008 8:37:42 AM)

You might want to consider hanging out where they can be found... local fetish clubs, dungeons, munches, workshops, demos, etc.  Maybe consider becoming active in your local community.
 
John



CatdeMedici -> RE: Truthfully - how do I find a playmate (12/6/2008 8:51:35 AM)

Play is a subjective term with as many meanings as love----Hannibal Lector played with his partners--get the drift?
 
Clearly define what you mean---if it ends or has to do with sex---say so--if its kink, toys, etc--say so--Play partners are best found in REAL life---in your area, there are many good groups that you can build a relationship with--if you are looking here, don't expect anyone to roll over in 8 days.



celticlord2112 -> RE: Truthfully - how do I find a playmate (12/6/2008 8:55:21 AM)

Step away from the computer.



yourMissTress -> RE: Truthfully - how do I find a playmate (12/6/2008 9:01:22 AM)

John's got the right idea.  You have to go out and find them, they may come to you, if you are more specific and clear about what it is you want. 

Knowing what you want is important.  You say "playmate" what does that mean to you?  I know what it means to me, but everyone has different ideas.  What kind of relationship are you looking for?  Casual is what it sounds like to me.  Not too many women looking for a part time playmate, but they are out there.

You also don't specify what kind of play you are looking for.  If you are looking for a relationship that goes beyond play, that may not be of utmost importance, but if you are looking for casual play partners, the type of play you want to do is very important.

Find the local groups on yahoo, you may find out more there about what and who is in your area.  Attend the local munches, meet people, make friends, build friendships with people, then you will find people who may be interested in playing.



voxpoet -> RE: Truthfully - how do I find a playmate (12/6/2008 11:04:18 AM)

Yeah, this is such a specific lifestyle that I thought maybe it would be easier to have a profile and network this way like I do with models :)

I don't know of the groups in my area. I am also not a driver, so it seems unlikely that I would go too far from home...

No. Not looking for much more than a casual partner on the occasion that we both want to come together and explore. If I want a relationship again, it will likely develop from one of these people. It doesn't have to end up in sex, and that really isn't the point. It is more of an emotive aesthetic thing for me at this point.

bb



NihilusZero -> RE: Truthfully - how do I find a playmate (12/6/2008 11:10:55 AM)

Not to come across as snippy...but your interaction with alt photography aside, I'm missing where your interests are actually WIITWD (aka BDSM) related at all. 



LadyPact -> RE: Truthfully - how do I find a playmate (12/6/2008 11:15:31 AM)

Here's what works for Me, but you might not get the same result.

Step 1.  Dress in leather.

Step 2.  Assemble toy bag.

Step 3.  Enter club, private party, or play space.

Works for Me every time.



CatdeMedici -> RE: Truthfully - how do I find a playmate (12/6/2008 11:19:05 AM)

Now LadyPact, that is so NOT fair--no one is as hot as you.
 
<smiles>



peppermint -> RE: Truthfully - how do I find a playmate (12/6/2008 1:23:37 PM)

When I was looking for casual partners, I went to places where those casual partners might be found.  I went to munch while on vacation as there were none nearby, attended events, and networked through the people I met at those places.  I certainly didn't count on a partner dropping into my lap from the internet. 

If you wish to find out if there are any groups near you, follow the link in my signature.

Edited to add....I just looked up your city using the link in my signature.  There are 6 separate groups/munches in your area.  I'll bet one one of them is located on a bus route.  Also, often times if you contact the group through email, someone will also offer you a ride.



E2Sweet -> RE: Truthfully - how do I find a playmate (12/6/2008 1:32:25 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyPact

Here's what works for Me, but you might not get the same result.

Step 1.  Dress in leather.

Step 2.  Assemble toy bag.

Step 3.  Enter club, private party, or play space.

Works for Me every time.



For some odd reason, I'm thinking the fact that you also have breasts and sexy boots somehow factors in there as well...[;)]



LadyPact -> RE: Truthfully - how do I find a playmate (12/6/2008 2:09:00 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: CatdeMedici

Now LadyPact, that is so NOT fair--no one is as hot as you.

<smiles>


That's very nice of you to say, and I appreciate the compliment, but I'm sure there are many Dommes out there that are better looking than I am.

quote:

ORIGINAL: E2Sweet

For some odd reason, I'm thinking the fact that you also have breasts and sexy boots somehow factors in there as well...



Well, the boots are kind of covered in step one.  The breasts kind of make it part of *why* it works for Me, when it probably wouldn't work for a male Dom.



MidMichCowboy -> RE: Truthfully - how do I find a playmate (12/6/2008 10:31:12 PM)

Finding someone to just play for a short time: relatively easy.

Finding someone to love and pursue a relationship with ... damn near impossible.

Life is great as long as it's the first one you want. The loneliness sets in when you realize that isn't what you want out of life.



Maya2001 -> RE: Truthfully - how do I find a playmate (12/7/2008 6:55:10 AM)

groups in the kentucky area

http://www.drkdesyre.com/meetppl/orgs/orgskansas.html#KY



sambamanslilgirl -> RE: Truthfully - how do I find a playmate (12/7/2008 7:07:44 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: voxpoet

Yeah, this is such a specific lifestyle that I thought maybe it would be easier to have a profile and network this way like I do with models :)


lmao - thanks for funniest quote of the week.

seriously, you need to get out more and physically interact with others as mentioned within local BDSM groups. playmates just don't fall from the sky and land on your cock after joining the site.



CarrieO -> RE: Truthfully - how do I find a playmate (12/7/2008 7:13:41 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyPact

Here's what works for Me, but you might not get the same result.

Step 1.  Dress in leather.

Step 2.  Assemble toy bag.

Step 3.  Enter club, private party, or play space.

Works for Me every time.




*Puts buying a bit of leather on her list of things to do. LadyPact, I love your posts.*
 
Like anything in life...you get out of it what you put into it.  Local groups are a great idea, even if you need to find a way to travel. My closest one is 1 hour away but I know the only way to meet/connect/learn is to make the effort.
 
Good luck.



thetammyjo -> RE: Truthfully - how do I find a playmate (12/7/2008 7:28:22 AM)

Find a local community or a regional community and get involved.

Not once, not twice, but regularly and sincerely get involved. Take risks and put yourself out there by volunteering to do things for these groups. It gets you known and you get to know others over the years.

Yeah, I said years. There is not quick way to find solid partners -- casual or serious -- not in the vanilla world and not in the alternative sexuality world unless you are wiling to pay for it. Sad truth in my experience.



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