Respectful (Full Version)

All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> Ask a Master



Message

MasculineDom -> Respectful (12/28/2005 11:41:06 PM)

Have any other Masters been told by his submissive that he doesn't treat her with respect? I was told this tonight, and it really bothered me as I respect her very much, as my submissive, as a mother to her children and as a working professional.



FTopinMichigan -> RE: Respectful (12/29/2005 4:12:51 AM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: MasculineDom

Have any other Masters been told by his submissive that he doesn't treat her with respect? I was told this tonight, and it really bothered me as I respect her very much, as my submissive, as a mother to her children and as a working professional.


Obviously this is something best to discuss with her...especially if you respect her. [;)]

You say you respect her as a "submissive"...as a "mother"...as a "working professional"....have you thought to just respect her, for the "person" she is, without labeling, or differentiating her lifestyle roles?

Just my opinion, but I think you really should talk with her about your feelings...to help figure out hers. If she feels you don't respect her, I think you could hardly expect "her" to respect you then. Time to talk.

K



DesertRat -> RE: Respectful (12/29/2005 7:14:12 AM)

No, I have not been told this. Wait...that might have been said earlier this year in the heat of a bad breakup, but we were both spewing so much bile at each other that it would have been nothing more than an item on a grocery list. So I will still answer "no".

I'd suggest 1) talking this out in private; 2) doing a personal reality check to ensure that your actions reflect the respect you claim to have. Saying vs doing, right?

Bob



Nendarye -> RE: Respectful (12/29/2005 8:45:07 AM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: MasculineDom

Have any other Masters been told by his submissive that he doesn't treat her with respect? I was told this tonight, and it really bothered me as I respect her very much, as my submissive, as a mother to her children and as a working professional.


You need to find out WHY she thinks that. Did you do something specific at that time to make her feel that way? Say something? Was she maybe feeling particularly sensitive at that time and took your words or actions to be disrespectful?

These are things that you need to discuss with her. Communication is always key in ANY relationship. Open, honest, no holds barred communication.

I wish the best of luck to you both.




MasterLark -> RE: Respectful (12/29/2005 9:10:33 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: MasculineDom

Have any other Masters been told by his submissive that he doesn't treat her with respect? I was told this tonight, and it really bothered me as I respect her very much, as my submissive, as a mother to her children and as a working professional.


My wild guess is that if it bothers you either you actually didn't treat her with respect OR both of you may be confused about what respect actually means in your relationship.



FangsNfeet -> RE: Respectful (12/29/2005 11:41:41 AM)

quote:

Have any other Masters been told by his submissive that he doesn't treat her with respect?


Call BULL SHIT! If she dosen't think she's been getting respect now, wait untill you don't give her any respect at all. Once she figures that out, then let her know that she can slowly earn that respect back as long as she stops bitching about it. Otherwise, she can start being the Dom if you want to let her.



fastlane -> RE: Respectful (12/29/2005 3:30:23 PM)

This transcends the BDSM lifestyle. This was said to the first CaveMan...Before that to Adam...Before that...ummmm, Don't know if God was told that, but, I'd bet yes.

Fuck that Aretha Franklin song for all women.......R-E-S-P-E-C-T

I'm tired of hearing it!

Oh, to answer your question.....Yes, but next time I hear it, I'm whoopin serious ass!



sweetpettjenny -> RE: Respectful (12/29/2005 6:32:18 PM)

Fangs... first of all the submissive in question is me, and second i wasn't as you say bitching about respect . Something he said upset me at the core of my being and it is personal between he and I , and i believe it to be resolved. Im not asking to be Dominant , and i feel your statement is quite harsh and basically not accurate to what occured. We all have certain baggage and he knows my past relationships have brought a certain amount along for the ride. I wasn't respected in anyway shape or form in the past and treated borderline abusive. We talked things out , and things are ok today. Respect goes both ways Fang , and without it no relationship will survive, whether it is lifestyle or not. Just food for thought ....because women are submissive doesn't mean that they can't give or earn respect.
Wesley ..thankyou for talking things through and being in my life...I love you
your pet jennifer
quote:

ORIGINAL: FangsNfeet

quote:

Have any other Masters been told by his submissive that he doesn't treat her with respect?


Call BULL SHIT! If she dosen't think she's been getting respect now, wait untill you don't give her any respect at all. Once she figures that out, then let her know that she can slowly earn that respect back as long as she stops bitching about it. Otherwise, she can start being the Dom if you want to let her.




KatyLied -> RE: Respectful (12/29/2005 7:07:17 PM)

Jenny - I'm glad things have been resolved. I was thinking about you when I read the op.



FangsNfeet -> RE: Respectful (12/29/2005 8:31:19 PM)

quote:

Something he said upset me at the core of my being and it is personal between he and I , and i believe it to be resolved


That's great things are "resolved" and happy. So if it's personal why was it brought up in a public forum for all of us to read and reply to? As for the whole story, it wasn't posted in the opeing thread. I didn't get it, don't know it, and not interested in hearing it. I only replied to the situation given as was posted. There was nothing in the thread that stated the whole problem or that you where the sub. But even if I did know, I'd still stick with the calling Bull Shit advice. As for the repect lecture, I can do with out it. It's been given enough times on the Dr Phil show. Other than that, pet and I have a great 2 way respectful relationship.

Last but not least I don't think all women are submissive. Nor do I think that submissives can't earn and or give respect.
I never said it so stop thinking it.



FTopinMichigan -> RE: Respectful (12/30/2005 4:36:31 AM)

Now I'm wondering...regarding the original post...how respectful is it to bring a private matter to a public forum?

K



LuckyAlbatross -> RE: Respectful (12/30/2005 6:04:09 AM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: FTopinMichigan

Now I'm wondering...regarding the original post...how respectful is it to bring a private matter to a public forum?

K

Agreed, not like any of us would have a clue who it was about until openly admitted.

I see that Jenny feels she was disrespected. That doesn't mean she WAS or that it was appropriate for her to just say so. My guess it that it was just a knee-jerk defensive manuever to shove the issue onto someone else rather than dealing with the underlying emotional issues.

Hopefully they've worked through this particular snag and next time she won't be as prone to knee-jerk.

And he will be more prone to sit down and talk with her rather than asking a random board for advice from a vague situation.



MasculineDom -> RE: Respectful (12/31/2005 5:51:54 AM)

I love you too, pet.

Master Wes

quote:

ORIGINAL: sweetpettjenny

Fangs... first of all the submissive in question is me, and second i wasn't as you say bitching about respect . Something he said upset me at the core of my being and it is personal between he and I , and i believe it to be resolved. Im not asking to be Dominant , and i feel your statement is quite harsh and basically not accurate to what occured. We all have certain baggage and he knows my past relationships have brought a certain amount along for the ride. I wasn't respected in anyway shape or form in the past and treated borderline abusive. We talked things out , and things are ok today. Respect goes both ways Fang , and without it no relationship will survive, whether it is lifestyle or not. Just food for thought ....because women are submissive doesn't mean that they can't give or earn respect.
Wesley ..thankyou for talking things through and being in my life...I love you
your pet jennifer
quote:

ORIGINAL: FangsNfeet

quote:

Have any other Masters been told by his submissive that he doesn't treat her with respect?


Call BULL SHIT! If she dosen't think she's been getting respect now, wait untill you don't give her any respect at all. Once she figures that out, then let her know that she can slowly earn that respect back as long as she stops bitching about it. Otherwise, she can start being the Dom if you want to let her.



quote:

Wesley ..thankyou for talking things through and being in my life...I love you
your pet jennifer



FTopinMichigan -> RE: Respectful (12/31/2005 5:56:10 AM)

I love happy endings! [:)]

K



sweetpettjenny -> RE: Respectful (12/31/2005 6:04:27 AM)

Me too and thankyou Ma'am ...i received your email.



sweetpettjenny -> RE: Respectful (12/31/2005 6:14:41 AM)

Sometimes we post things , all of us, beccause we are upset , and both of us were , i am happy and in a good relationship, and more happy because he cared enough about us to try and get advice on something he was shocked and upset over. i have been in a D/s relationship all of my adult life , so i know the dynamics of how they work. Unfortunately sometimes we are so busy being Dominants and submissives we forget We are people first, Fathers, Mothers, and Friends. i am not knee jerking or remotely trying to be disrespectful of any member on these boards , all i want to say is its not always black and white , it has many other signifigant colors in between. So in return sometimes the reactions we post are very hard core and unfeeling. i hope never to be unfeeling about others posts , and will always try to remember it was posted for a reason and wasn't a joke. hops off my box and thanks everyone for posting .
Have a great New Year All!!!!
jennifer



TallDarkAndWitty -> RE: Respectful (12/31/2005 7:38:32 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: LuckyAlbatross
And he will be more prone to sit down and talk with her rather than asking a random board for advice from a vague situation.



Some people like the attention a public spat garners...not saying that is the case here, but there is some saying about shoes and fitting that would seem to apply.

Taggard



MHOO314 -> RE: Respectful (1/1/2006 11:50:41 AM)

Well, you say you have a submissive, yet you have a profile that indicates you are looking for a sub but does not mention that you currently have a submissive-. They say actions speak louder than words--based on that I'd say she wasn't the leader of the pack--maybe you need to rethink your actions---get the picture?



MJSunshine -> RE: Respectful (1/1/2006 12:13:06 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: MHOO314

Well, you say you have a submissive, yet you have a profile that indicates you are looking for a sub but does not mention that you currently have a submissive-. They say actions speak louder than words--based on that I'd say she wasn't the leader of the pack--maybe you need to rethink your actions---get the picture?



In the journal entries of his profile, MasculineDom very clearly announces he is the proud owner of sweetpettjenny and prior to that indicates that he had met someone he was very happy with.



MHOO314 -> RE: Respectful (1/1/2006 12:39:38 PM)

yes, journal entries but not profile, many do not read journal entries---



Page: [1] 2   next >   >>

Valid CSS!




Collarchat.com © 2025
Terms of Service Privacy Policy Spam Policy
0.046875