Nilla sex NO SPRINKLES

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nonuts4thshoney -> Nilla sex NO SPRINKLES (12/30/2005 12:40:12 PM)
Okay all, i have a question and some feelings i'm haveing about vanilla sex to get off my chest. i'm sure there are many of us that "Make Love" . No tying hands to the bed posts, no furry handcuffs, no ball gags, floggers, whips or chains. Making love can be really nice. i and enjoy it every time Master and i do. Its a beautiful thing two people in love share together. However, last night as Master and i were making love, and i couldn't seem to get into the mood. Now sometimes i'm not in the mood but i get into as we start. Then things are great. Last night it seemed that all i could think about was being spanked, tied up, gaged, flogged etc. For a second i almost wanted to cry becuase i thought to myself "whats wrong with me, i can't have regular sex anymore?" . Do i need to have some sprinkles for sex to be good? Master told me last night that i was fine. But i don't feel fine. i had no interest in sex last night. It felt blah to me. i feel so horrible inside for feeling this way. Like i said, i've always enjoyed very much having some good old nilla sex, but something changed in me last night and it kinda has me confused. Maybe its just a one night feeling i'd had and will pass. So my question to you all is this: Have any of you ever felt this way and if so how did you deal with this? Also out of curiousity, how has your Master/Mistress reacted to this?

Jennylu48 -> RE: Nilla sex NO SPRINKLES (12/30/2005 1:09:56 PM)
Very interesting post!! In the first place ... I wouldn't feel bad about it. I think everyone, now and again, for no apparent reason is just simply not in the mood. It is like food. Most of the time I like eating lunch, but there are the days that I dont want to eat lunch. No real reason ... just a feeling Also you are dealing with two people. It seems on that night you were thinking about one thing and your Master was thinking about another. It does happen that our inner emotional clocks (as I call them) get out of wack. Again, sort of like food. There were nights I was dying to have pasta and my ex wanted steak. So I made the steak. It was ok, but, damm I wanted that pasta!! I don't think you have a thing to woory about. You sound pretty normal to me!

kalstolyn -> RE: Nilla sex NO SPRINKLES (12/30/2005 1:20:29 PM)
I don't think you need to worry, unless you find that you have little or no interest in sex at all, vanilla or otherwise, for an extended period of time. Then you should talk to a doctor, as this can be an indicator of any number of serious illnesses.

Nendarye -> RE: Nilla sex NO SPRINKLES (12/30/2005 6:45:01 PM)
I have never enjoyed sex WITHOUT the sprinkles, so........ [:)][:)]

miticantenslaved -> RE: Nilla sex NO SPRINKLES (12/30/2005 6:54:42 PM)
miti greets you...miti and her Master "make love" as well. yes, sometimes miti is not into it and would rather be gagged and tied. she has put this down to days events...life situations...hormonal changes and fluctuations....etc, as it is usually fleeting in nature. it does not happen regularly for her, just upon occasion. miti usually shrugs it off and goes about her business. miti hopes this helped you... ~miti

IrishMist -> RE: Nilla sex NO SPRINKLES (12/30/2005 7:17:34 PM)
Hmmm tough one...with sprinkles...without sprinkles... For me, it has to be with sprinkles all the time.....no if's and's or buts about it. I enjoy pain and degradation too much to settle for the ....well...for the boredom of Nilla sex....be rough, be tough, make me cry,make me beg.....that's what gets me turned on

foxglove716 -> RE: Nilla sex NO SPRINKLES (12/30/2005 11:27:03 PM)
There was a time for a few months when I flat out refused vanilla. But I do enjoy it now every once in awhile. Vanilla is a good flavor to cleanse the palette

Sensualips -> RE: Nilla sex NO SPRINKLES (12/30/2005 11:32:50 PM)
I think if it seems to be anomaly you should just accept you were "not in the mood." It happens. I think placing too much significance on it might cause you to overthink vanilla sex the next time. Just let it happens. If it becomes an issue and you find you really miss the act and emotions accompanying making love, then it might be something to look at more critically.

Mercnbeth -> RE: Nilla sex NO SPRINKLES (12/31/2005 8:59:47 AM)
quote: i had no interest in sex last night. It felt blah to me. i feel so horrible inside for feeling this way.................Last night it seemed that all i could think about was being spanked, tied up, gaged, flogged etc........Master told me last night that i was fine. But i don't feel fine. i had no interest in sex last night. It felt blah to me. i feel so horrible inside for feeling this way. Like i said, i've always enjoyed very much having some good old nilla sex, but something changed in me last night and it kinda has me confused. Maybe its just a one night feeling i'd had and will pass. . to this slave, the above sentence is equivalent to saying: "i had little to no interest in pleasing Master, through "Nilla sex" regardless of my own personal agenda. the fact that all i could think about was what i wanted from it and anything less felt blah to me is more important than the pleasure Master got from it, so i am considering holding on to that feeling even though Master and i have discussed it and she does not see it as an issue." sorry if that sounds harsh. please don't take it as a personal criticism, it's just that this slave doesn't understand when people are involved in a Master/slave relationship and "issues" like these arise. this slave understood from the beginning that indeed, it IS all about Master's pleasure, anything less comes under the heading of a part-time submissive play partner with certain expectations to be fulfilled at certain times.....any pleasure this slave receives comes in the context that it is allowed by Master and is not a given--ultimately it is Master who decides how and when and with who, etc. to this slave, that makes EVERY sexual encounter purposely NOT vanilla. quote: Have any of you ever felt this way and if so how did you deal with this? Also out of curiousity, how has your Master/Mistress reacted to this? thankfully, "Nilla sex" is a hard limit for Master! that doesn't mean there are whips and clips involved every time~but, EVERY time this slave is submitting to Master... to His desires, to His pleasure. it really matters not --to this slave--if this slave is personally "in the mood" because this slave is under constant submission to Master, therefore, "Nilla sex" is clearly NOT an option...make sense?

KatyLied -> RE: Nilla sex NO SPRINKLES (12/31/2005 9:11:29 AM)
I can enjoy vanilla sex, but only with a kinky partner. Does that make sense? Maybe because I know that I will get my quota of kink. Sometimes I like to have a quickie or "regular" sex. But usually there is a bit of kink involved in that somehow, some way. I guess I enjoy kink and semi-van sex. Confused yet? edited because I really need to put on my glasses

justheather -> RE: Nilla sex NO SPRINKLES (12/31/2005 9:27:25 AM)
Because for me the mental "fuck" and mental connection is where I really find the ultimate expression of my personal kink, I do not imagine it would be possible for me to have "vanilla sex" with my dominant. Even if he were to do something completely out of character and approach me in the most mundane, ordinary, missionary-position- brace-yourself-Gracie cause here-comes-three-minutes-of-heaven kinda way, it would still be an act of submission, of putting aside my desire (for rest, for time alone, for some hot kinky interaction instead, perhaps) for his pleasure and therefore, in my mind, kinky. I hear what you are saying, though. Straight plain old copulation isnt a manner of having sex that you find particularly enjoyable. Nothing wrong with that. If you can imagine, there are people out there who actually dont like being tied up and humiliated during sex. There are women of one race who fantasize only about men of another. There are men who fantasize only about BBW's. There isnt anything wrong with them, either. Perhaps if you frame the sexual activity in such a way that, mentally, it is an act of service to your dom, ("it" being the act of having sex in a way you do not find particularly pleasing) you will find that little something extra that will make it enjoyable for you. Whether or not you enjoy it on this psychological level, you are transforming it into an act of kink, if you will, because you are engaging in sexual activity that you do not find particularly pleasing, for the sake of your dominant. And, really, that isnt vanilla sex at all. :-) Or at least, it's vanilla sex with the option to Bring Your Own Sprinkles. I had a sort of self-induced crisis a couple of years ago wherein I decided something was "wrong" with me because I couldnt get off on "vanilla" sex. Then I tested the implications of "vanilla-izing" my thought life surrounding sex, and let's just say that after facing said implications, I chose to let go of the worry and decided to just be me. I hope you dont let it get to you for too long either.

miticantenslaved -> RE: Nilla sex NO SPRINKLES (12/31/2005 9:48:33 AM)
quote: Perhaps if you frame the sexual activity in such a way that, mentally, it is an act of service to your Dom, ("it" being the act of having sex in a way you do not find particularly pleasing) you will find that little something extra that will make it enjoyable for you. And, if not, you are still having sex with your Dom in a manner that is not particularly pleasing to you, which is service to him and an act of submission, which is anything but vanilla sex. interesting take, heather...miti loves it and thank you! ~miti

justheather -> RE: Nilla sex NO SPRINKLES (12/31/2005 10:10:06 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: miticantenslaved interesting take, heather...miti loves it and thank you! ~miti You are welcome and thanks for the nod :-)

fastlane -> RE: Nilla sex NO SPRINKLES (12/31/2005 10:23:13 AM)
Vanilla, chocolate, Rasberry? I like all flavors of Sex, I'm not prejudice, but Kinky is the flavor that gets the most attention. I will admit though, that I have been with purely vanilla, only, girls for a long period of time......and my hunger for more ice cream and sprinkles became Vampirish in nature......I had to have it! Peace, Kevin

sub4hire -> RE: Nilla sex NO SPRINKLES (12/31/2005 10:24:47 AM)
quote: So my question to you all is this: Have any of you ever felt this way and if so how did you deal with this? Also out of curiousity, how has your Master/Mistress reacted to this? Everyone everywhere has times whe they are not in the mood. If you are always in the mood you are with a doormat. Who would want no challenge to be with a doormat? I imagine your Master loves you for who you are. Most do. Which means you take the good times and the bad times. Sex or boring sex. Spice is the variety of life. Vanilla is good. Bondage is good. There can be many different reasons why the vanilla sex is boring you right now. Yet, you are right on track by communicating it with your Master. With communication you will solve all.

Mercnbeth -> RE: Nilla sex NO SPRINKLES (1/1/2006 10:06:52 AM)
quote: If you are always in the mood you are with a doormat. this slave disagrees with this narrow-minded line of thinking. to be ready for the Master/owner/Dom/Domina, sexually, and be "in-the-mood" is but ONE of the many ways one can and does submit. just because one has not positively experienced it personally does not mean that it only exists in the negative connotation that folks like to label as "doormat". even though sub4hire didn't say it, but others in the past have, it also does not mean that one is a "nymphomaniac" and needs professional counseling. to some, it means you are an obedient slave. quote: Who would want no challenge to be with a doormat? there are plenty of folks who seek this lifestyle, or WIITWD, not for challenge to conquer another and bend them to their will, or be bent to someone's will from time to time, but for fulfillment in a journey that is shared together. If someone desires their slave to be in a 24/7 sexually submissive state then that is the goal to strive for if not already the service they provide and is not, in this slave's opinion, a doormat, but something, once achieved to be proud of.

LuckyAlbatross -> RE: Nilla sex NO SPRINKLES (1/1/2006 6:05:53 PM)
I used to feel that way when I first got into the scene. SInce then I've learned to enjoy the intimacy and connection that can come from vanilla sex. SOme people might not ever feel that, just as some never feel connected with kinky sex. Just different methods to get to the same place. I dislike "vanilla sex bashing" that often occurs on bdsm boards.

nonuts4thshoney -> RE: Nilla sex NO SPRINKLES (1/2/2006 10:56:22 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: LuckyAlbatross I used to feel that way when I first got into the scene. Maybe thats what i'm experiencing then. i'm new to the scene, so maybe i'm still somewhat in a sub frenzy kinda thing. Like i tend to be bratty in the bedroom some times because i know that Master will pin me down kinda forcefully. LOL! and i've noticed that since experiencing sub space it's kinda like a drug. i want more and more and more. Maybe after some time my need for kink will tone down some.

nonuts4thshoney -> RE: Nilla sex NO SPRINKLES (1/2/2006 1:02:04 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: sub4hire Everyone everywhere has times whe they are not in the mood. If you are always in the mood you are with a doormat. Who would want no challenge to be with a doormat? I imagine your Master loves you for who you are. Most do. Which means you take the good times and the bad times. Sex or boring sex. Spice is the variety of life. Vanilla is good. Bondage is good. There can be many different reasons why the vanilla sex is boring you right now. Yet, you are right on track by communicating it with your Master. With communication you will solve all. After thinking about what could be the problem i came to the conclusion that its probably because i am still new to the scene as i told L.A. right above. Last night i had some really hot nilla sex! Only a little tweeking of the nipples. Master says to me " See, you still like nilla sex". i laughed because She had the cutest smile on Her face when She said that. i think i may just have some times when i only wanna be thrown around the room and some times when i'll love rated g sex. LMAO!! Maybe this is what many go through when they are new to the scene. They are finding out who they are and what their likes and dislikes are. i'm still learning alot about myself and i'm glad that i have such a wonderful Master who understands this. [:)]

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