RE: Dual Personalities

RE: Dual Personalities (Full Version)

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NuevaVida -> RE: Dual Personalities (12/27/2008 11:23:30 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Darcyandthedark I just don't get why people have to ask the question. the.dark. Maybe it's an existential thing. Why ask why, ya know? [8D] My guess is that they are coming to terms with themselves and want to know how other people are doing it - conducting themselves. Thanks for the holiday wishes, hon. I'm finally up from what I was calling my "death bed" (was dreadfully sick) and venturing off to lunch with a friend now. I hope you & Darcy are having a great holiday!

LadyHibiscus -> RE: Dual Personalities (12/27/2008 12:13:39 PM)
I'm myself, wherever I am. I'm don't dress provacatively, and I don't talk about scene related stuff in front of those who don't know, or need to know. I am a leader, not a tyrant, so I doubt that anyone would peg me for the most sadistic bitch in the room. [;)]

RCdc -> RE: Dual Personalities (12/27/2008 12:38:55 PM)
I ask why coz I wanna know![:D] And girlie - you have to get healthier next year and cease all this illness and accidents! Have fun! the.dark.

OrionTheWolf -> RE: Dual Personalities (12/27/2008 2:31:27 PM)
None. I am who I am, I do not assume a role. My property is mine, no matter where we are. quote: ORIGINAL: CatdeMedici When you are with vanilla friends/family/work, which element of your D/s life/personality gets hidden the most? Or does it?

JustDarkness -> RE: Dual Personalities (12/27/2008 2:34:23 PM)
I am as much vanilla as I am bdsm (well..I am human mostly..lol) I don't talk about computers with peopel that don't liek computers. I don't talk about BDSM when I am with people that are not interested in BDSM. Otherwise. I am just me....with lifestylers..and vanilla's/friends....at work..or in private. I don't change...else I would be acting..

YourhandMyAss -> RE: Dual Personalities (12/27/2008 2:35:55 PM)
I don't hide anything from friends and family. If you're someone I consider a friend they you're OK with me being who I am and being out about who I am or you wouldn't be called a friend., and if you're my Family well the only people I consider Family are my parents, and they know too. They've known for years I was kinky, and they have absolutely no problem, with being kinky or with my partner who lives with us, and has since February. At work Daddy is discreet, But then people at work don't need to know his sexual proclivities any more than they need to know anything else super personal about him. His Family also knows he's kinky, and They know he's my Daddy too, and they're not wild about me or our relationship due to some friction early on, They don't bring it up and he doesn't either. And it's a big flaming who cares, to us, if they don't approve. quote: ORIGINAL: CatdeMedici When you are with vanilla friends/family/work, which element of your D/s life/personality gets hidden the most? Or does it?

Usako -> RE: Dual Personalities (12/27/2008 3:08:01 PM)
I don't have a "vanilla" personality and I don't have a BDSM one; I'm just me all the time.

lronitulstahp -> RE: Dual Personalities (12/27/2008 3:10:10 PM)
quote: I don't talk about computers with peopel that don't liek computers. I don't talk about BDSM when I am with people that are not interested in BDSM. i like that...simple, and to the point.

Aneirin -> RE: Dual Personalities (12/27/2008 3:46:42 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: CatdeMedici When you are with vanilla friends/family/work, which element of your D/s life/personality gets hidden the most? Or does it? None of it, my friends know me, and accept me for who I am. Why change a personality for anything you do, to hide oneself, is akin to be dishonest with oneself. Besides, to hide a part of you, takes care not to let that hidden part slip, and I just cannot be bothered to be ever vigilant against something slipping out in the wrong scenario. People, work leisure or play, take me as they find me, I refuse to be anyone but myself in any scenario.

BRNaughtyAngel -> RE: Dual Personalities (12/27/2008 3:56:43 PM)
I agree with others in that behaviors, appearances and conversations are carried out in a manner that is appropriate for the setting. I do however have a new "issue" I have to dance around a bit with family and "vanilla" folk. That being my new collar. For Christmas, He bestowed upon me a new eternity collar from Vad Farkas (ringofsteel.net). It is beautiful, but obviously not exactly the normal diamond necklace, etc that many guys give their girls as a gift.... and obviously not your standard jewelry worn by women. It's not that I have to adopt another personality or behavior because of it, but rather that I have to explain it in a careful way to those who aren't "in the know" when they ask about it. I do it in the same way I would if it were a diamond engagement ring - with love and enthusiasm, explaining that it is a symbol of our committment to each other. Family members aren't going to say anything that might upset me, so they just give that "look", smile and say something about it being pretty, etc... By the way, my parents thought it was great! LOL! It does get stared at a good bit while I'm at Walmart or just out-n-about. I figure some people probably think it's one of those doodads that convicted felons have to wear so they don't wander off! Heh! [;)]

beargonewild -> RE: Dual Personalities (12/27/2008 7:33:57 PM)
It's the actual extent of my involvement that my non kink friends are unaware of. Most do know I am involved in BDSM yet they do not realize how much. My thoughts are if they want to know then they have to ask out of honest curiosity.

oceanwynds -> RE: Dual Personalities (12/27/2008 7:46:59 PM)
My mind hasn't been able to wrap itself around the concepts of being submissive or being vanilla. I don't act out either of them. I don't act out baking, or working, or anything else that is part of who i am. Personally find it to limiting to my spirit and makes me sneeze. oceanwynds

MaamJay -> RE: Dual Personalities (12/27/2008 8:30:28 PM)
Being already dual in bdsm personalities ... I've no wish to become a triple! I am who I am ... when i'm out with just Master then primarily it's violet who is observable in my interactions with Him, though that does depend on what's going on. If He wants me to organise a lot, then Jay is the organiser and we appear as equals to an outsider. It's also more usually Jay who actually deals with other people, as I've no wish to act submissively to anyone other than to Master. If I am out with My sub, then I am more overtly Dominant, but always appropriate to the situation and the people around. Maam Jay aka violet[A]

BondageBarbieX -> RE: Dual Personalities (12/28/2008 12:05:19 AM)
No,all my friends and family no I am a submissive so I hide it from no one

NefertariReborn -> RE: Dual Personalities (12/28/2008 11:00:37 AM)
I'm pretty much the same. The "lifestyle trappings" of course aren't flaunted. I don't go around calling Myself Mistress ____. But the core traits that make Me a lifestyle Dominant are the same core traits that are exhibited everyday in everything that I do. Sometimes I do the lurking thing in real life. I don't consider that pretending. Sometimes there is a person that I think has the potential to develop some leadership skills. I'll intentionally step back or decline leadership and suggest that person.

daddysliloneds -> RE: Dual Personalities (12/28/2008 11:07:14 AM)
none, unless of course, you're talking about the element of my personality that is only seen behind closed doors and with the one i'm intimate with at the time, such as a good beat and fuck session[:D]

littlewonder -> RE: Dual Personalities (12/28/2008 11:44:04 AM)
The d/s is a part of my everyday life. I am always submissive to Master and I obey in whatever way pleases him. It's not obvious..doesn't have to be. He leads, I follow. It simply means He's in control of our lives together.

silkncarol -> RE: Dual Personalities (12/28/2008 11:44:52 AM)
I agree with this statement......i am who i am...no matter if i'm working or with vanilla friends. I don't necessarily hide my interest in BDSM, but i also don't flaunt it either. quote: ORIGINAL: RealSub58 quote: ORIGINAL: CatdeMedici When you are with vanilla friends/family/work, which element of your D/s life/personality gets hidden the most? Or does it? My personality is who I am; with Sir, with family or with friends or with co-workers. Elements of my sexuality may come out in a casual conversation ~ ie: I believe I have said something like ~ "a little discipline spank might help with that habit."

IronBear -> RE: Dual Personalities (12/28/2008 4:05:03 PM)
What you see is what you get. BDSM, Victorian Lifestyle, pagan are all parts oi the one. Anyone who meets me soon know that we livea Victorian Lifestyle and believe in good manners etc. It is open knowledge throughout the area where I live that I am an ordained Pagan Priest. If theyget to know me well they find out that we are kinksters and into BDSM. Nothing is hidden (except for details of my professional cases and past involvement details in SF Opps). I'm just too long in the tooth these days to even want to go back to hiding parts of my life and support this with lies as I used to when under cover in foreign countries.

DesFIP -> RE: Dual Personalities (12/28/2008 6:23:15 PM)
The words that would freak people out are not used. The relationship remains the same. We were visiting his family today and he looked up and said "we need to leave, long drive ahead". My response was "wow, look at the time. Thank you so much for having me" as I stood up. What I didn't say was "Yes Master/Sir/Overlord of the Universe". I didn't say "this girl is always at your command". I just did what he wanted. What he didn't say was "Get moving bitch/whore/slut". They can make their own decision about our relationship. They just don't hear the words that would upset them needlessly.

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