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Thickies - 1/2/2009 5:29:24 AM   
FourQ


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I saw a lady at work today putting a credit card into her floppy drive and pulling it out very quickly. I inquired as to what she was doing and she said she was shopping on the internet, and they asked for a credit card number, so she was using the ATM "thingy".

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I worked with an individual who plugged their power strip back into itself and for the life of them could not understand why their computer would not turn on.

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1st Person "Do you know anything about this fax-machine?"
2nd Person "A little. What's wrong?"
1st Person "Well, I sent a fax, and the recipient called back to say all she received was a cover-sheet and a blank page. I tried it again, and the same thing happened."
2nd Person "How did you load the sheet?"
1st Person "It's a pretty sensitive memo, and I didn't want anyone else to read it by accident, so I folded it so only the recipient would open it and read it."

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I recently saw a distraught young lady weeping beside her car. "Do you need some help?" I asked. She replied, "I knew I should have replaced the battery in this remote door unlocker. Now I can't get into my car.
"Do you think they (pointing to a distant convenience store) would have a battery for this?"
"Hmmm, I dunno. Do you have an alarm, too?" I asked.
"No, just this remote 'thingy,'" she answered, handing it and the car keys to me. As I took the key and manually unlocked the door, I replied, "Why don't you drive over there and check about the batteries...it's a long walk."

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Tech Support "What does the screen say now.."
Person "It says, 'Hit ENTER when ready'."
Tech Support "Well?"
Person "How do I know when it's ready?"

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Several years ago we had an intern who was none too swift. One day he was typing and turned to a secretary and said, "I'm almost out of typing paper. What do I do?" "Just use copier machine paper," she told him. With that, the intern took his last remaining blank piece of paper, put it on the photocopier and proceeded to make five blank copies.

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One of our servers crashed. I was watching our new system administrator trying to restore it. He inserted a CD and needed to type a path name to a directory named "i386." He started to type it and paused, asking me "Where's the key for that line thing?" I asked what he was talking about, and he said, "You know, that one that looks like an upside-down exclamation mark." I replied, "You mean the letter "i"?" and he said, "Yeah, that's it!"

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I was in a car dealership a while ago when a large new motor home was towed into the garage. The front of the vehicle was in dire need of repair and the whole thing generally looked like an extra in "Twister." I asked the manager what had happened. He told me that the driver had set the cruise control, then went in back to make a sandwich.

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And, one addition from a friend: She's been doing temp work at various offices. At one place she became the resident expert on the photocopy machine. One day there was a big backup. She went over to help and found that no one knew how to stop the copier from "punching" three holes down the side of each copy. She opened the paper tray, removed the three-hole paper and solved the problem.

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RE: Thickies - 1/2/2009 7:39:53 AM   
Saratov


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And these people are walking around loose, some are reproducing....  some with others in the group.

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RE: Thickies - 1/2/2009 8:21:19 AM   
FourQ


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Now that's a scary thought!

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RE: Thickies - 1/2/2009 9:22:51 AM   
MadAxeman


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At my last office job first thing in the morning I was beginning a long document while a colleague perused a newspaper.
'What's today's date' I lazily enquired
'I don't know, this is yesterday's paper' came the answer.



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RE: Thickies - 1/2/2009 10:22:29 AM   
sirsholly


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*snort*

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RE: Thickies - 1/4/2009 8:35:24 AM   
bluesgun


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My sister called me once saying her computer wouldn't start,I asked if it did anything at all.
She replied no it didn't even make a noise like usual.
I said well did it get unplugged or something?
she said she didn't think so but would check as soon as the power lines were back up and she could see.

Best wishes
Blues

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RE: Thickies - 1/4/2009 9:56:49 AM   
FourQ


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Had a guy do the same thing years ago - the guys wouldn't believe me until I told them which customer it was!

I also, back when Windows 3.0 / 3.1 came out, had a seamstress kill the mouse after using it as a foot pedal.
The number of people who've asked me where they put the installation CD in to a wireless router is unthinkable.

At the same time, I've seen a technician electrocute himself after forgetting to unplug a machine before working on it.


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RE: Thickies - 1/4/2009 12:04:23 PM   
BlackPhx


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Here's your Sign..... 

poenkitten

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RE: Thickies - 1/4/2009 4:08:43 PM   
Saratov


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Well at least all computers come with those 'cup holders' now.

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RE: Thickies - 1/5/2009 2:20:27 AM   
cravesdom


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I've had an applicant for a job ask me what the date was. It was the day after Christmas. Then she needed to run outside and ask her husband for their address. I asked her how long they had lived there. Three years. Needless to say, she did not get hired.

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RE: Thickies - 1/5/2009 6:00:11 AM   
Owner59


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quote:

ORIGINAL: Saratov

Well at least all computers come with those 'cup holders' now.


<snort> 

Nifty powered ones, no less......

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