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RE: Here's a question - 1/7/2006 12:41:26 AM   
girl4you2


Posts: 1622
Joined: 8/4/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: fastlane

To settle for seconds is like admitting defeat before the game is played...... It's like wanting to be the ballerina and having to settle for the face in the moon as a back-drop.....Tell your friend "No", Bob. Now, get on point and point him in the right direction.

Peace, Kevin

i agree with fastlane, Bob. you'll not be happy if you settle for second when you want something else first and foremost. it's hard to wait, but that's part of life i've learned. it's never "tutu" late to find someone.

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maireann croí éadrom i bhfad. is maith an scáthán súil charad. is leor nod don eolach.
got shoes?

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Profile   Post #: 21
RE: Here's a question - 1/7/2006 12:57:42 PM   
MsSonnetMarwood


Posts: 1898
Joined: 2/10/2005
From: Eastern Shore, Maryland
Status: offline
quote:

he's tried, but its slim pickens for Dominas in his area---we don't tend to gravitate to Atlantic City.


Actually, I'm from south Jersey (although I live elsewhere now), and there's quite a few lifestyle dommes in the area.

I think no matter what area one is in, however, it's hard to find one accepting of him being married, AND not in an open relationship, AND not "wanting a relationship, AND not being service oriented, AND having some pretty specific interests that he wants met, AND not wanting to see a prodomme.

That I would say narrows the field far more considerably than location.

I think it's clear that he seeks someone who is play oriented with similar kinks, but no strings attached - I certainly have met far more men that cover that bill than women.

Just my .02

< Message edited by MsSonnetMarwood -- 1/7/2006 1:08:08 PM >

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Profile   Post #: 22
RE: Here's a question - 1/8/2006 10:02:02 AM   
MsIce


Posts: 59
Joined: 3/31/2005
Status: offline

I
quote:

think no matter what area one is in, however, it's hard to find one accepting of him being married, AND not in an open relationship, AND not "wanting a relationship, AND not being service oriented, AND having some pretty specific interests that he wants met, AND not wanting to see a prodomme.

That I would say narrows the field far more considerably than location.


This is one of my big faves actually. People who want a Mistress, however there is no committment, as they are already committed elsewhere. What does this make the prospective Mistress? Someone to go to when their kink needs a shake up?

No wonder so many of us separate our lives into lifestyle and Pro.

(in reply to MsSonnetMarwood)
Profile   Post #: 23
RE: Here's a question - 1/8/2006 4:06:25 PM   
peppermint379


Posts: 111
Joined: 8/18/2004
Status: offline
quote:

Lets say there is a Male Sub, who is looking for a Mistress, but due to lack of Mistresses in his area, he is thinking of looking for a Master. Would you tel this sub to wait for what he really wants, or settle for whatever is out there, since there are so much moreMasters around than Mistresses?


I guess the answer depends on what you're looking for. Sir frequently gets contacted by male subs. Some are just tired of self-bondage and want a taste of what real bondage is like. Sir is very happy to do this for them as he enjoys bondage. A few wish to be femmed which is also something he'd be interested in trying one day when he meets the right person. If a Master would satisfy your kinks, at least on a temporary basis, then i see no reason not to go for it.

(in reply to BalletBob)
Profile   Post #: 24
RE: Here's a question - 1/8/2006 7:18:07 PM   
BalletBob


Posts: 1645
Joined: 7/14/2005
Status: offline 		Or maybe ther is a Mistress out there, who is also committed to someone else. Maybe she doesn't have the time for RT, or due to family life at home, can't have that type of relationship, and would like to have something else. No commitments, to get in her personal life.

BalletBob

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Profile   Post #: 25
RE: Here's a question - 1/8/2006 8:19:57 PM   
MsSonnetMarwood


Posts: 1898
Joined: 2/10/2005
From: Eastern Shore, Maryland
Status: offline
quote:

Or maybe ther is a Mistress out there, who is also committed to someone else. Maybe she doesn't have the time for RT, or due to family life at home, can't have that type of relationship, and would like to have something else. No commitments, to get in her personal life.


That is indeed might be possible, however probable or improbable.

But you might want to recognize that your own limitations in what you have to offer directly affect being able to find a Domme.

When you claim there aren't any local dommes in an area where there are indeed quite a few, or claim that all the local dommes are pros as you did in another thread when indeed they are not all pros, it gives the impression that you are dealing out sour grapes for just not being able to find exactly what you want, and that you do not accept that your own limitations directly affect your ability to attract a Domme.

It's a matter of taking responsibility for what's going on in one's own life vs. blaming others for what one can't seem to find.

Sometimes if those limitations are too confining, one has to sit down and seriously re-evaluate what they are offering vs. what they are looking for, and see if there is somewhere to compromise. That compromise might be to see a male dominant who is willing to provide no strings play as you previously brought up, or see where you offer more than you currently are offering to a potential partner, or give up looking altogether, or just keep trying the same way you have been in the hopes that maybe possibly someone is out there that is suitable for you and you suitable for them.

< Message edited by MsSonnetMarwood -- 1/8/2006 8:34:37 PM >

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Profile   Post #: 26
RE: Here's a question - 1/8/2006 8:30:38 PM   
AAkasha


Posts: 4429
Joined: 11/27/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: MsIce



I
quote:

think no matter what area one is in, however, it's hard to find one accepting of him being married, AND not in an open relationship, AND not "wanting a relationship, AND not being service oriented, AND having some pretty specific interests that he wants met, AND not wanting to see a prodomme.

That I would say narrows the field far more considerably than location.


This is one of my big faves actually. People who want a Mistress, however there is no committment, as they are already committed elsewhere. What does this make the prospective Mistress? Someone to go to when their kink needs a shake up?

No wonder so many of us separate our lives into lifestyle and Pro.


What they want is a pro femdom situation but for free.

Akasha

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Don't email me here, email me at [email protected]

(in reply to MsIce)
Profile   Post #: 27
RE: Here's a question - 1/8/2006 8:37:19 PM   
MsSonnetMarwood


Posts: 1898
Joined: 2/10/2005
From: Eastern Shore, Maryland
Status: offline
quote:

What they want is a pro femdom situation but for free.

Akasha


The arguement is often made that a pro isn't "real".

I would question how "real" can a Mistress/sub relationship be if the sub wants no loyalty, no obligation, no commitment, to a Mistress. ::shrug::

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~Ms. Sonnet Marwood~

Deja Moo: The feeling you've heard this bull somewhere before.

(in reply to AAkasha)
Profile   Post #: 28
RE: Here's a question - 1/8/2006 8:43:25 PM   
AAkasha


Posts: 4429
Joined: 11/27/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: MsSonnetMarwood

quote:

What they want is a pro femdom situation but for free.

Akasha


The arguement is often made that a pro isn't "real".

I would question how "real" can a Mistress/sub relationship be if the sub wants no loyalty, no obligation, no commitment, to a Mistress. ::shrug::


I think that's what the subs say. They don't want a pro session because it doesn't feel "real" because she isn't really dominating hin, she is doing what he wants done to him, he is paying for a service and knows he will get x, y and z because she asks him what he is into.

But at the same time, he wouldn't want a "free" session with a non-pro femdom if he came over and got to do absolutely NOTHING that even remotely matched any of his fantasies -- combined with no intimacy, no affection/lust, no commitment and no sexual contact.

Akasha

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Don't email me here, email me at [email protected]

(in reply to MsSonnetMarwood)
Profile   Post #: 29
RE: Here's a question - 1/8/2006 10:32:20 PM   
BlkTallFullfig


Posts: 5585
Joined: 6/25/2004
Status: offline
quote:

What they want is a pro femdom situation but for free.

Akasha
That's what I would think, but, who am I to say what other people do? I just know that I would feel like the servant in those situations, and a cheap one at that. M

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a.k.a. SexyBossyBBW
""Touching was, and still is, and will always be, the true revolution" Nikki Giovanni

(in reply to AAkasha)
Profile   Post #: 30
RE: Here's a question - 1/8/2006 10:40:23 PM   
veronicaofML


Posts: 1317
Joined: 11/19/2005
From: from iowa..now in wisconsin
Status: offline 		would question how "real" can a Mistress/sub relationship be if the sub wants no loyalty, no obligation, no commitment, to a Mistress. ::shrug::
=========

thats ME..........i owe no one nothing...so i am not obligated...i pay my own way...
i do not commit...i say i will stay as long as it serves MY purpose...when i no longer feel being in service is useful...i will leave...and find someone that actually needs service...
i have to know i am needed...that i have an actual purpose..
loyal? i am as loyal as SHE is...if SHE finds someone better than me and decides i am not needed...i go...everyone is replaceable..ask my 3 wives...ask anyone that is an employee...ask the president...ANYONE can be replaced...

if the domme isnt worth her salt...why would a sub stay? real is what ya make it...
no piece of paper makes it real.
just like marriage...
my 1st wife had a kid wasn't mine...that piece of paper aint worth the ink printed on it.
my 2nd wife was after fortune and figured out taxi owners dont get rich,..
my 3rd was a drunk and said she prefers booze to men.

loyal?

show me ONE person that is more loyal than "I" am...i stick it out until i aint wanted...which is usually MOST of the time...
6 months and counting...and i aint holding my breath,.,,,esp with what difficulties she has with her vanilla hubby....
the 1st domme was 15 months...but she was too ill to keep going...i gave her $50,000 but i left coz i was not needed...

define............loyal for me.


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drugs sex and rock n roll,...drugs are good and so is the rock n roll, sex is over rated"
=============
"go straight to hell, do not pass go and do not collect $200"



(in reply to MsSonnetMarwood)
Profile   Post #: 31
RE: Here's a question - 1/10/2006 11:03:27 PM   
BalletBob


Posts: 1645
Joined: 7/14/2005
Status: offline 		OUCH! I guess I am put in my place.

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(in reply to MsSonnetMarwood)
Profile   Post #: 32
RE: Here's a question - 1/11/2006 5:51:08 PM   
Arpig


Posts: 9930
Joined: 1/3/2006
From: Increasingly further from reality
Status: offline 		I guess there is a first time for everything isn't there TeeGO

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Profile   Post #: 33
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