quote:

ORIGINAL: hallieB
develope a little more understanding of the lifestyle itself.

quote:

ORIGINAL: MadRabbit

quote:

ORIGINAL: hallieB
develope a little more understanding of the lifestyle itself.

Well, then your in luck, because I am having one of those mornings where I haven't had my coffee and I feel like saying what I really think.

And what I really think is this...

The vast majority of self proclaimed Masters who inhabit Internet message boards are, in fact, narcissistic and arrogant sons of bitches with an attitude of superiority and an obsession with grandeur and megalomania so when the subject of "training" and "teaching a submissive" comes up, it usually results in the reduction of grown adults into undeveloped and ignorant children who are in need of their Masterly tutelage to grow into functioning adults on par with their own God-like status.

Of course, this is all bullshit, doesn't match the reality of any relationship, and is merely the byproduct of the pretentious posturing of such Masters who cannot admit to having any weak points or actually learning and growing as the result of what the slave brings to a relationship, because God forbid, they look UnMasterly to the anonymous Internet masses.

On the flip side of this, we have the down-to-Earth dominants and Masters who present training and teaching in a more realistic context of personal preference. My training consists of showing someone how much sugar and cream to put in my coffee or how to wear their hair or how to suck my cock. Anything beyond these personal preferences is simply "give and take" like any other relationship. I help someone understand themselves more as a submissive. They help me understand myself more as a dominant. I've helped a girl with managing her money and developing a budget. One has helped me develop better social and communication skills. I've taught someone a lot about philosophy. She taught me a good bit about economics and other political viewpoints beyond my own.

I am not on a personal mission or have a "training agenda" to mold submissives or slaves into enlightened, highly evolved little snowflakes who stand as a representative of the pinnacle of humanity, because I am, in fact, not an enlightened, highly evolved little snowflake who stands as a representative of the pinnacle of humanity. I am, in fact, a guy with a lot of flaws who occasionally does stupid shit, am going to meet a girl with different flaws and does different kinds of stupid shit, and via the virtue of the meshing of our two separate entities, we might grow to be two people who have less flaws and do less stupid shit.

On top of all that, we have the third group who is scattered among the other two where their conception of "training" is merely a kinky fantasy they have adopted from their favorite porno video that involves nipple clamps, bondage, and spankings.

Of course, I could be wrong and completely off base, but I am usually not.

Now where is my coffee?

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ORIGINAL: LuckyAlbatross

First I'd have to figure out if they knew adaptability, self awareness, flexibility and introspection.  If they didn't have those basics down, any further training would be meaningless.

quote:

ORIGINAL: hallieB

i know every Master and every situation is different, but i was curious if you were a Master and wanted to train a sub.... especially one new to the lifestyle.....what would be some of the first things you would teach your sub/slave. i ask this question to try and develope a little more understanding of the lifestyle itself.

1. Basic Training 101: Teaching her/him what is expected, modes of address acceptable, basic duties (such as how I like my coffee or tea and how Lady Neets likes her Coffee, Tea or Milo. Getting used to two large playful and oft boisterous dogs and of course her place in the home. She/he would be kept naked or close to and be required the privilege of wearing clothes about the house and would be used as I chose and used often in one intimate way or another (to reinforce his or her bondage and that he or she are indeed property) NOTE: if the dynamic was going to be non sexual the usage would not apply but the nudity would). The hierarchical structure of Bruin Cottage.
2. Basic Training 102: Acceptable methods of serving refreshments using both Gorean serve (Low Protocol) and also serves appropriate to the Victorian era (Medium Protocol). Forms of dress appropriate for Low or Medium Protocol situations. How to answer the door if we are not handy. Basic Domestic Duties. Behavior in public and with non lifestyle or vanilla guests.
   
3. Advanced Training: Required Dress Codes for High Protocol Functions, manner of addressing guests, answering the door or phone. How to deal with “Groping” or other inappropriate guests.  Formal service of food and refreshments (Silver Service may be taught too).
4. BDSM Training: Dependent if BDSM is going to be part of the deal. Sitting down and reviewing the list of BDSM activities available at the time, working on limits etc and including “try out" sessions to allow her or him to start to develop trust and confidence.

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ORIGINAL: DesFIP

Basically, his preferences in daily life that make life easier for him. No peas with meals, on the side is fine but not mixed in a dish. No breakfast at other meals which I think is a pity because there are days when that's all I want.

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ORIGINAL: MadRabbit

I am not on a personal mission or have a "training agenda" to mold submissives or slaves into enlightened, highly evolved little snowflakes who stand as a representative of the pinnacle of humanity, because I am, in fact, not an enlightened, highly evolved little snowflake who stands as a representative of the pinnacle of humanity. I am, in fact, a guy with a lot of flaws who occasionally does stupid shit, am going to meet a girl with different flaws and does different kinds of stupid shit, and via the virtue of the meshing of our two separate entities, we might grow to be two people who have less flaws and do less stupid shit.

quote:

ORIGINAL: hallieB

i know every Master and every situation is different, but i was curious if you were a Master and wanted to train a sub.... especially one new to the lifestyle.....what would be some of the first things you would teach your sub/slave. i ask this question to try and develope a little more understanding of the lifestyle itself.