Guys...I don't "get" email domination.

Guys...I don't "get" email domination. (Full Version)

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Loliita -> Guys...I don't "get" email domination. (1/16/2009 9:52:06 PM)
Ok, I am new to this although I have been a dominant girl all my life. My profile tells my story. There's something here that baffles me. Email domination. I am not talking webcam domination, for I can understand how that works because the people can see each other. I'm having guys message me and asking me to dominate them by email. Some even offer to pay which I always refuse. (if you paid me then you would be in control and not me, no thank you) When dealing with men (and some women) in person I have almost always been able to control them and bend them to my will. I can't see how this would carry though in email. A guy can't see anything but my picture. He can't hear or smell me. He can't see my mood or facial expressions. He won't fear me slapping him across the face. I can understand if the guy had met me and might meet me again then he might fear me or be in awe of me. But guys I have never met doing as I say? I just don't get it. Guys, can a woman really control you through email? I know you can't speak for all men so just speak for yourself. I would like to read what some of you men say and what is your reasoning. edit.... Actually, I don't really get webcam domination either. Seeing a little tiny moving picture of a woman does not seem to instill fear or awe. I would never undress for a guy on webcam so I don't really know how my dominant power would carry through.

Usako -> RE: Guys...I don't "get" email domination. (1/16/2009 10:02:56 PM)
I've never been able to get it either. I don't get the whole online/cam/long distance domination at all. I get that emotions can form on line and with distance in the way but the idea of taking orders or giving them to someone via e-mail/IM/phone/whatever baffles me. I've tried it and it bores me. E-mail a guy and tell him to torture his balls...where does that get me? They get their kink met and think they're doing a service because I asked...but I get to sit on the other end with this empty "Oh yeah...some dude put clothes pins on his balls" feeling. It's just a general empty feeling for me which is why I don't do it. I have nothing against chatting, perhaps even playful flirting with a submissive or dominant on line but anything past that is out of the question. I have role played BDSM on line before. And not that shitty faux cyber nonsense you see in the chatrooms, like paragraph RP written in third person for the sake of using one's imagination and story telling. It was fun and easy to do. Guess the fantasy of the RP (ie, as made up characters in a made up place etc etc) is a lote more amusing and literally enjoyable than sending some orders to some horny dude and getting a reply that hints that he did it...but you'll never know. Or even if you have proof, that hint of frustration that it was YOU yourself stepping on his balls or putting him panties or whatever orders you give people on line. shrug I didn't like giving orders nor taking them on line. It made me not even want to do what the person said really and generally dislike them for trying to tell me what to do via text or a phone. Bleh

slvemike4u -> RE: Guys...I don't "get" email domination. (1/16/2009 10:03:10 PM)
Once recieved an unsolicited CM mail from a stunning woman located in New Zealand,who offered me the opportunity to be her slave.Needless to say I was perplexed,in my mind there were certain logistical problems......Problems my prospective new owner pish poshed away ,explaining for the time being she would Dominate me via email and IM till I was ready to fly half way around the world to fall at her feet.The whole experience was for me amusing.....I am sure if I would have continued the correspondence much more merriment would have ensued......

DominaSmartass -> RE: Guys...I don't "get" email domination. (1/16/2009 10:10:37 PM)
Two words: Wank Fodder. Didn't we cover this in another thread already? ;)

Loliita -> RE: Guys...I don't "get" email domination. (1/16/2009 10:13:20 PM)
To Usako. Actually, if I knew I could control a guy (the right type of guy) online I could use it to fulfill one of my fantasies. I know what I get out of it. I just don't understand what the other person gets out of it. Couldn't he just send himself emails and tell himself what to do? In person I can make almost any man beg ..but by email....well...until they invent scented emails that can slap you upside the head....I don't see how I would control a man or woman.

Loliita -> RE: Guys...I don't "get" email domination. (1/16/2009 10:14:47 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: slvemike4u Once recieved an unsolicited CM mail from a stunning woman located in New Zealand,who offered me the opportunity to be her slave.Needless to say I was perplexed,in my mind there were certain logistical problems......Problems my prospective new owner pish poshed away ,explaining for the time being she would Dominate me via email and IM till I was ready to fly half way around the world to fall at her feet.The whole experience was for me amusing.....I am sure if I would have continued the correspondence much more merriment would have ensued...... You seem familiar. :-) maybe she was a scammer.

chathamvahere -> RE: Guys...I don't "get" email domination. (1/16/2009 10:15:22 PM)
I just do not get the whole online/cam/email thing, If I can't touch her, bend her and see her sweat, it just isn't real or worth doing.

Loliita -> RE: Guys...I don't "get" email domination. (1/16/2009 10:18:57 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: DominaSmartass Two words: Wank Fodder. Didn't we cover this in another thread already? ;) I don't care if they jack or wank. I'm sure my real life boyfriends do the same when they go home after spending time with me. What I want to know is what makes a submissive obey a master through the internet? How does the dominant power move through email. btw, Do you answer every op with the response ...."wank fodder" ?

dreamerdreaming -> RE: Guys...I don't "get" email domination. (1/16/2009 10:26:09 PM)
LOL! Loliita you kill me! And DominaSmartass, in her jeans and combat boots. What's not to love about that? You guys rock.

SteelofUtah -> RE: Guys...I don't "get" email domination. (1/16/2009 10:32:33 PM)
Dead serious Answer. Because to many what we do is a fucking game and something that they Play around with because actually doing it would be unacceptable to thier idea of socially acceptable and to question what is acceptable or not is just to difficult for them so that play at it with words and then only experince what it is that we do in the privacy and control of thier own minds. Now Paint your Toe Nails each a different collor and Masturbate with a Spatula and then e-mail what you were thinking about while you were subitting to my commands and uber Domliness. Signed SuperGrandMasterDom4U2Bslave2 Aka Steel

Loliita -> RE: Guys...I don't "get" email domination. (1/16/2009 10:33:04 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: dreamerdreaming LOL! Loliita you kill me! And DominaSmartass, in her jeans and combat boots. What's not to love about that? You guys rock. Just call me Lolita (one i) The extra i is because a closed account had Lolita with one i. Are you jacking my thread in order to praise me? ummm....Okay, I'll let it go this time. :-) I don't see any male submissives telling me why they like email domination. They are around, I know, because my inbox is still receiving messages. They just don't seem to read the forums. Too bad for them because I generally reply to email from forum posters. ..........hint hint to any male submissives reading and stalking.

dreamerdreaming -> RE: Guys...I don't "get" email domination. (1/16/2009 10:34:44 PM)
hurries away to get the nail polish

Loliita -> RE: Guys...I don't "get" email domination. (1/16/2009 10:35:41 PM)
To SteelofUtah.....errrr...okay?

SteelofUtah -> RE: Guys...I don't "get" email domination. (1/16/2009 10:39:53 PM)
Perhaps I should have said that the first part was serious and the other part was a Parody of what you are confused about. There really isn't much to get about it. Some people do what we do in the Physical world and some perfer it only in thier mind and so the E-mail gives them a faceless act that they don't have to be ashamed of because it was all just in thier head. Maybe, lighten up a bit, have fun, Life is Life and remember no one gets out alive. Steel

Loliita -> RE: Guys...I don't "get" email domination. (1/16/2009 10:48:53 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: SteelofUtah Perhaps I should have said that the first part was serious and the other part was a Parody of what you are confused about. There really isn't much to get about it. Some people do what we do in the Physical world and some perfer it only in thier mind and so the E-mail gives them a faceless act that they don't have to be ashamed of because it was all just in thier head. Maybe, lighten up a bit, have fun, Life is Life and remember no one gets out alive. Steel You're making up your own op question and answering it. I didn't ask what the men get out of it because I already know that. I asked .... quote: Guys, can a woman really control you through email? I want to know how a man is controlled by a dominant through email when the man has nothing to fear from the lady and doesn't even have her presence to be in awe of. You're not a sub so maybe you don't know the answer to the real op question. Oh, your statement about no one getting out of life alive....has not been proven in my case as of yet. :-P

CalifChick -> RE: Guys...I don't "get" email domination. (1/16/2009 10:55:15 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Loliita I want to know how a man is controlled by a dominant through email when the man has nothing to fear from the lady and doesn't even have her presence to be in awe of. I don't personally know anyone who uses fear as a vehicle to deliver their dominance. Maybe a small few who use awe, but awe doesn't have a lot of staying power. They do it because it fulfills their fantasy. They want someone to tell them what to do; you tell them what to do and their fantasy is fulfilled. Cali

Loliita -> RE: Guys...I don't "get" email domination. (1/16/2009 11:08:52 PM)
quote: I don't personally know anyone who uses fear as a vehicle to deliver their dominance. Maybe a small few who use awe, but awe doesn't have a lot of staying power. President Bush had shock and awe, I have fear and awe. Some boyfriends obeyed me because they feared I would not see them anymore if they didn't. All boyfriends obeyed me because they were in awe of me. My awe has a lot of staying power because I am AWESUM! :-O

CalifChick -> RE: Guys...I don't "get" email domination. (1/16/2009 11:11:22 PM)
Well, as long as those sorts of relationships make you happy, more power to ya. Cali

Loliita -> RE: Guys...I don't "get" email domination. (1/16/2009 11:13:32 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: CalifChick Well, as long as those sorts of relationships make you happy, more power to ya. Cali Thank you. Yes, relationships where I and the guy (or girl) both get what we want....those relationships do make me happy. :-)

YoursMistress -> RE: Guys...I don't "get" email domination. (1/17/2009 12:51:34 AM)
Well, I am a guy, a sub, and not into email domination, but I will give you the dubious value of my insights. I learned everything I knew about BDSM (up until a few weeks ago) in "Second Life" MMORPG environment. I play there as a woman avatar and have submitted to a wonderful woman in the "game". While I am with her online, I will do anything for her that the 3D environment allows. I feel as if I have completely submitted to her. And then we both log out and I can go to work, or to class, or whatever. It is my belief that many of the online-only crowd like to be able to "put it away" after logging and have essentially the best of both worlds. As I now begin my journey into real life BDSM, I understand that the commitments are real, the consequences are real and the interaction is real, in other words, the stakes are higher. For those who have never tried the real thing, it may be frightening or maybe just harder than the email/online version. yours

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