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newflowers -> RE: The more experienced submissive (1/7/2006 6:29:33 PM)
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The best and longest lasting D/s relationship I've had was for three years with an initially inexperienced gentleman.Of course, as he introduced me to D/s, until he told me, i did not know. i don't know that his experience or lack thereof was what worked for me - it was who he was as a man. while scening and playing is all well and good, in the d/s dynamic, the control, authority, and greater strength are my poisons of choice - he did this ever so well.
since that time, i have met some dominant gentlemen - and those not so gentle - who did claim experience and i think someof them actually had experience. none of these worked for me - experience meant that i was expected to behave according to the submissive playbook he had created, or worse, like a submissive partner he had in the past. no experience meant floundering and uncertainty.
however, i do not think the problem with these attempts to create a d/s dynamic was experience or the lack thereof. being expected to act like someone else really did NOT work for me. and, still dealing with my need for control, strength, and authority, it was that spark that was lacking for me.
if the style of play wre important - anything extreme or edgy, experienced and i would probably be fine with one who was learning - from workshops. classes, and seminars before practicing his wares on my soft skin.
in my case, it is the attributes of the man himself - these are not dependent upon experience and i would happily build a D/s relationship with a man who is not experienced.
newflowers
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