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How do I meet real people - 1/23/2009 7:12:50 AM   
rastermanblu


Posts: 61
Joined: 9/27/2008
Status: offline 		Hi there my name is Bill.  And I am recovering serial monogamist.  I have sublimated my inner desires for most of my life.  Felt it was weird and a frankly more than a little afraid to reveal my real tastes for fear of offending and losing those that I cared about.   Well I stopped caring for last partner, ended a seven year year marrage.  And now I have made the decision to simply be true to myself and completely honest in describing what I am seeking for my next relationship.  If you care to see my profile, happy for anyones thought's on how I present myself.  By the way I am not fat, bald,illiterate, illmannered
or a fake.
I took a bit of hiatus from the site recently,  being called a "fake ass domme"  old and fat by some took its toll-and I pushed a few who showed interest a bit hard, scared them off. 
Part of that is I do take delight in finally telling some my darkest fantasies,  which tend to be confused with reality by those I message.  And I simply love fucking with sub/slaves who write arrogant and rude profiles.  

I'm definitely not all sweetness and light,  but I'm not a freak and I just want to find some one whose interests are in line with mine.  So someone please help me figure out this out
Profile   Post #: 1
RE: How do I meet real people - 1/23/2009 10:00:23 AM   
SunnyTawse


Posts: 151
Joined: 11/17/2004
Status: offline 		My very best recommendation is to become involved in your local r/t kink community.

Munches and social events generally have a no-play, street-wear policy and are generally extremely safe, pleasant ways to dip your toe into the kink community.

There are several online references for finding groups and their munches or other social events; please contact me if you need further information.

Sunny Tawse
Sadien Domina
Archon of Rings
http://AthenorLodge.com

(in reply to rastermanblu)
Profile   Post #: 2
RE: How do I meet real people - 1/23/2009 12:39:32 PM   
rastermanblu


Posts: 61
Joined: 9/27/2008
Status: offline 		well thanks for that bit of advice...much appreciated.  Have been to intro scene here in DC.  Being single it is hard not feel an outsider or the proverbial fifth wheel...But will keep at it.

(in reply to SunnyTawse)
Profile   Post #: 3
RE: How do I meet real people - 1/23/2009 1:10:12 PM   
everhope


Posts: 2179
Joined: 8/19/2007
Status: offline 		i can relate to feelings of going out in the scene single...i have for years and years.what i did was make friends...lots of friends. i am pretty sure i could go to an event anywhere in this country and somebody i know might be there or somebody there would know somebody i know. it really is small world. i find a comfort in that. making friends made opportunties for me to explore different kinds of play also. ultimately, what i was seeking was an intimate relationship with others..he found me here on CollarMe the one place i avoided up until a year or so ago.
i never settled for what i knew wouldn't work for me, yet i didn't cut myself off from having experiences either. i kept myself out and about both online and publically.
 
my persistence paid off, but i still think Starbucks owes me a free cuppa for all the business i have brought their  way.
 
may we all find our bliss.  

_____________________________

may we all find our bliss

Resident VWB

We all die.
The goal isn't to live forever.
The goal is to create something that will.






(in reply to rastermanblu)
Profile   Post #: 4
RE: How do I meet real people - 1/23/2009 1:22:03 PM   
everhope


Posts: 2179
Joined: 8/19/2007
Status: offline 		oh p.s.
i thought your profile was well written. it didn't have the usual firm but fair ...strict but loving. which was refreshing. 



_____________________________

may we all find our bliss

Resident VWB

We all die.
The goal isn't to live forever.
The goal is to create something that will.






(in reply to everhope)
Profile   Post #: 5
RE: How do I meet real people - 1/23/2009 1:32:00 PM   
rastermanblu


Posts: 61
Joined: 9/27/2008
Status: offline 		Thanks for the complement on the profile.  At times I wonder if it is a bit too demanding.  But I am serious about wanting a defined paradigm going into a relationship. Realize that reaching the level I seek takes patience and also respect.   I'm not into force unless it is willing and desired by who I seek.  That for me is the turn-on.  Again appreciate your thoughtful comments.  Best, R. 

(in reply to everhope)
Profile   Post #: 6
RE: How do I meet real people - 1/23/2009 1:33:39 PM   
rastermanblu


Posts: 61
Joined: 9/27/2008
Status: offline 		By the way does anyone know,  how the hell I get rid of the vanilla cone.  I don't even like vanilla ice cream,  can't it at least be chocolate.

(in reply to rastermanblu)
Profile   Post #: 7
RE: How do I meet real people - 1/23/2009 1:41:10 PM   
mistoferin


Posts: 8284
Joined: 10/27/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: rastermanblu

By the way does anyone know,  how the hell I get rid of the vanilla cone.  I don't even like vanilla ice cream,  can't it at least be chocolate.


Yes, read this:

how to get rid of that vanilla cone


_____________________________

Peace and light,
~erin~

There are no victims here...only volunteers.

When you make a habit of playing on the tracks, you thereby forfeit the right to bitch when you get hit by a train.

"I did it! I admit it and I'm gonna do it again!"

(in reply to rastermanblu)
Profile   Post #: 8
RE: How do I meet real people - 1/23/2009 1:46:42 PM   
everhope


Posts: 2179
Joined: 8/19/2007
Status: offline 		lol... the vanilla cone is there until after i think your 25th post. i so disliked that cone too. oh and posting is a good way to meet real people that is how the ResidentSadistSir and i began communicating. we ran across each other on the forums..he took "pause" and my heart would beat faster when we came across each others  posts. he eventually wrote to me and ..yep two real people have met and made a connection!
 
may we all find our bliss.     

_____________________________

may we all find our bliss

Resident VWB

We all die.
The goal isn't to live forever.
The goal is to create something that will.






(in reply to rastermanblu)
Profile   Post #: 9
RE: How do I meet real people - 1/23/2009 1:51:57 PM   
rastermanblu


Posts: 61
Joined: 9/27/2008
Status: offline 		thank

(in reply to everhope)
Profile   Post #: 10
RE: How do I meet real people - 1/23/2009 1:53:11 PM   
rastermanblu


Posts: 61
Joined: 9/27/2008
Status: offline 		you.
cheating is fun

(in reply to rastermanblu)
Profile   Post #: 11
RE: How do I meet real people - 1/23/2009 1:57:57 PM   
kittinSol


Posts: 16926
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: rastermanblu
you.
cheating is fun


?


_____________________________



(in reply to rastermanblu)
Profile   Post #: 12
RE: How do I meet real people - 1/23/2009 2:09:16 PM   
everhope


Posts: 2179
Joined: 8/19/2007
Status: offline 		lol...i think he is trying to up his post count and ditch the vanilla cone..
i was going to suggest posting in PollsRandomStupidity, if the vanilla cone really bothers you. playing the word games can up a post count fast and the bonus is there are some really nice people who hang out there. 

_____________________________

may we all find our bliss

Resident VWB

We all die.
The goal isn't to live forever.
The goal is to create something that will.






(in reply to kittinSol)
Profile   Post #: 13
RE: How do I meet real people - 1/23/2009 2:18:21 PM   
MrRodgers


Posts: 10542
Joined: 7/30/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: everhope

oh p.s.
i thought your profile was well written. it didn't have the usual firm but fair ...strict but loving. which was refreshing. 

Yea, afterall...who would ever want those qualities. Isn't it a bit interesting how one can generally refer to most if not all of just those qualities in a profile but as they say, not in that order...we call it refreshing ?

Do you confirm a profile specificity and sensitivity that the kinkosphere now acts or reacts upon, not the words themselves or their meanings but instead in...how it's worded ? 

(in reply to everhope)
Profile   Post #: 14
RE: How do I meet real people - 1/23/2009 2:26:53 PM   
ModeratorEleven


Posts: 2007
Joined: 8/14/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: rastermanblu

you.
cheating is fun

And it will earn you a vanilla cone that never ever goes away. 

XI


_____________________________

This mod goes to eleven.

(in reply to rastermanblu)
Profile   Post #: 15
RE: How do I meet real people - 1/23/2009 2:50:30 PM   
SunnyTawse


Posts: 151
Joined: 11/17/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: rastermanblu

Have been to intro scene here in DC.  Being single it is hard not feel an outsider or the proverbial fifth wheel...But will keep at it.




Yeah, I know. But there is no other way to prove yourself and let people get to know you. I think it's especially hard for male submissives, both because of society's expectations for men and because of the general perception that there are so many male submissives.

There *are* so many male submissives, but most of them stay behind their computer screens. I've found those who are brave enough to venture out to r/t social events end up actually getting some action... simply because they're THERE. I played for a year with a male who was not in my age range nor was he an appropriate partner in other regards, but he had a heart of gold and helped me in many ways... and he was THERE.

Definitely keep at it. And while you're keeping at it, volunteer to help with events when a group puts out a call for volunteers. It's a lot of work to put on even a moderately sized event, and helpers are always appreciated. That way you'll have a reason to be there and to be talking to people, and you get to know the movers and shakers.

Sunny Tawse
Sadien Domina
Archon of Rings
http://AthenorLodge.com

(in reply to rastermanblu)
Profile   Post #: 16
RE: How do I meet real people - 1/23/2009 11:51:57 PM   
disretion7


Posts: 74
Joined: 3/19/2006
Status: offline 		How do you DEFINE real or fake?  I've only ever been able to submit to professional Dominatrices but they were real to me. Though I know that many purists consider that a legitimate D/s relationship can't, truly, happen, between male subs and pro-Dommes, I was convinced that MY Dommes, really, enjoyed dominating me and I felt fulfilled, by that.  Since women are not into BDSM in the same numbers as are guys and since only a small percentage of women are Dominant, for MOST male subs, it is pro-Domme or no Domme.  I know that it is, still, not for everyone but, at an hourly rate, pro-Dommes are there for almost any guy who wants to submit.

(in reply to rastermanblu)
Profile   Post #: 17
RE: How do I meet real people - 1/24/2009 12:49:01 AM   
everhope


Posts: 2179
Joined: 8/19/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: MrRodgers

quote:

ORIGINAL: everhope

oh p.s.
i thought your profile was well written. it didn't have the usual firm but fair ...strict but loving. which was refreshing. 

Yea, afterall...who would ever want those qualities. Isn't it a bit interesting how one can generally refer to most if not all of just those qualities in a profile but as they say, not in that order...we call it refreshing ?

Do you confirm a profile specificity and sensitivity that the kinkosphere now acts or reacts upon, not the words themselves or their meanings but instead in...how it's worded ? 


yes, i called his profile refreshing because of the absence of  stating "firm but fair"..."strict but loving". i think it shows a lack of creativity and is simply boring to do so. 
 
may we all find our bliss.     

_____________________________

may we all find our bliss

Resident VWB

We all die.
The goal isn't to live forever.
The goal is to create something that will.






(in reply to MrRodgers)
Profile   Post #: 18
RE: How do I meet real people - 1/24/2009 4:39:30 AM   
rastermanblu


Posts: 61
Joined: 9/27/2008
Status: offline 		Everhope wins.  Absolutely right, simply upping my post count....Woohoo...but being as I'm busted, I'll take the hint  (moderatorEleven)
Discretion7,  the fake ass dom insult is react to having been called that in someone's profile.   Now what is a fake ass dom? A sheep in wolf's clothing?  Someone new to the scene? Why is that a problem?  Point is I'm over the intended insult.  Maybe.
Sunnytawse that's my plan, recently went to a Blackrose gateway meeting.  Going alone is an ordeal but I think your right it's probably the best way to actually meet a like minded lass.  And I have met people here so why not keep at it.
Mr. Rodgers puhleeeze I'm just try to avoid the cliches.
Thanks to all

(in reply to everhope)
Profile   Post #: 19
RE: How do I meet real people - 1/26/2009 11:28:52 AM   
beargonewild


Posts: 22716
Joined: 5/7/2007
Status: offline 		Welcome rastermanblu and may you find what you seek and enjoy your time here on the forums.

_____________________________

Do Not Rile da Chosen Bear

Promiscuous boy you already know
That I’m all yours what you waiting for?

Resident MANWHORE ~1000 Bear pts~

10 NZ points
Whips~n~Cuffs

(in reply to rastermanblu)
Profile   Post #: 20
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