RE: Love & D/S -- TOP v. BOTTOM

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RE: Love & D/S -- TOP v. BOTTOM - 1/12/2006 10:21:35 AM

truesub4u

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Love is something SOME people like to toy with. Use it as a game to mind fuck others with. I learned a long time ago to keep my feelings as far as emotional to myself. I suffered alone if I felt stronger feeling for one that didn't share the same feelings.

I finally had given up all hope. And figured I would spend the rest of my life in meaningless sexual only relastionships. So I gave up the sexual aspect of it as well. So then I just knew I was suppose to spend the remaining time I have left here, alone. I'm here just to raise my kids, get them ready for the harshness of the real world and nothing more.

And then here he comes. Master entered my life and showed me I was wrong. He did it so slowly, so NOT obvious, I never seen it coming. Let alone knew it happened till it did.

I think that Master knew, I couldn't or wouldn't submit to him 100% unless I felt something more than just a sexual attraction. He had to know I knew he thought more of me than a sex toy for his enjoyment. All though I very well may just be that. He makes sure I don't feel that way. Before, during and after a scene. And so far, I don't see Love interfering with the Sadism side of him. If anything, I see it adding to it. And knowing that he puts love in all he does, allows me to be more exposed, vulnerable, giving, and emotional for and to him.

Being how it is I have had sex for just the sake of having sex.... and i've had sex with "supposed" love..... and now that I have "Love" again... the sexual side.. doesn't really matter no more.

(in reply to cloudboy)

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RE: Love & D/S -- TOP v. BOTTOM - 1/12/2006 1:54:21 PM

cloudboy

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>in the SM realm love doesn't play much of a role. I'm a play-slut and I'll scene with darn near anyone after negotiating the scene.<

Do you know any subs who are also "playsluts?" Do you think subs are as free spirited as you or more guarded?

(in reply to EvilGeoff)

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RE: Love & D/S -- TOP v. BOTTOM - 1/12/2006 1:59:55 PM

cloudboy

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Love can wipe the pessimism right out of a person. I think you are a classic case of love changing your patterns, which was a topic touched on earlier in this thread.

(in reply to truesub4u)

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RE: Love & D/S -- TOP v. BOTTOM - 1/12/2006 2:15:02 PM

veronicaofML

Posts: 1317
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From: from iowa..now in wisconsin
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but why lol?

I would think that things like this would be important, at least to a point anyway. I would not want to be with a person who was unemotional, detatched, and invulnerable; and I would gander a guess that most would not want that either. I am not saying that LOVE HAS to be present, but basic human qualities,yes.
irishmist
================

bwaaahaaaaaaa
it's why most folks claim i am one heartless sonofabitch...
unemotionally involved......invulnerable...detached....not bonded to...
it's me it's me ALLLLL over........

and i like it that way.

no muss no fuss...
no one can lay claim..."you broke my heart and i gave you all my best"
argh
i hate soap operas.

take care

_____________________________

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RE: Love & D/S -- TOP v. BOTTOM - 1/12/2006 2:57:48 PM

yourMissTress

Posts: 1665
Joined: 6/14/2005
From: Nashville, TN
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And here I thought I had to care for someone before I paddled their ass...

Wait...yep, I do have to have some feelings for them. If I don't I might not care enough to stop before I truly hurt them.

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Tress

"If you have to tell people that you are a lady, you are not." My Grandmother

(in reply to veronicaofML)

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RE: Love & D/S -- TOP v. BOTTOM - 1/12/2006 3:00:39 PM

veronicaofML

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Wait...yep, I do have to have some feelings for them. If I don't I might not care enough to stop before I truly hurt them.

---------

promises promises....it''s all women give me...
never had one yet could follow through...
like She here...says she is gonna do it and ends up talkin to Her online boys all night...

yeah--right....

good thing i aint into s/m.

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drugs sex and rock n roll,...drugs are good and so is the rock n roll, sex is over rated"
=============
"go straight to hell, do not pass go and do not collect $200"

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RE: Love & D/S -- TOP v. BOTTOM - 1/12/2006 3:03:14 PM

yourMissTress

Posts: 1665
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From: Nashville, TN
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quote:

ORIGINAL: veronicaofML

Wait...yep, I do have to have some feelings for them. If I don't I might not care enough to stop before I truly hurt them.

---------

promises promises....it''s all women give me...
never had one yet could follow through...
like She here...says she is gonna do it and ends up talkin to Her online boys all night...

yeah--right....

good thing i aint into s/m.

It's not quite clear in your post, but since we've never met, I KNOW you are not referring to me...

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"If you have to tell people that you are a lady, you are not." My Grandmother

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RE: Love & D/S -- TOP v. BOTTOM - 1/12/2006 3:09:37 PM

IrishMist

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quote:

And here I thought I had to care for someone before I paddled their ass...

Wait...yep, I do have to have some feelings for them. If I don't I might not care enough to stop before I truly hurt them.

LOL nicely said...I like that

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RE: Love & D/S -- TOP v. BOTTOM - 1/12/2006 3:11:58 PM

veronicaofML

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It's not quite clear in your post, but since we've never met, I KNOW you are not referring to me...

--------

its YOUR words....
i just added that no domme has ever followed through..........
EVERY one i ever met has talked the talk but cant walk the walk.....

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drugs sex and rock n roll,...drugs are good and so is the rock n roll, sex is over rated"
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"go straight to hell, do not pass go and do not collect $200"

(in reply to yourMissTress)

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RE: Love & D/S -- TOP v. BOTTOM - 1/12/2006 9:04:02 PM

Sensualips

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Joined: 10/8/2005
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quote:

I work daily to push resentment and bitterness out of my life... these are emotions of weakness, you cannot resent someone unless you in some way feel less than them, you cannot be bitter without being resentful.

Ain't that the truth. The funny thing is, resentment and bitterness can feel like strength. They can fuel you, drive you, even provide you with focus. Eventually it sucks away ay your actual strength.

That being said, I enjoy indulging in bitterness now and again. The vitriolic Lenny-Bruce Sam-Kinison fun kind of bitterness. I find it very cleansing.

quote:

Is it universally true that a dominant should be able to control their emotions, without repressing them. Yes.

I would agree with this statement. I just feel the same holds true for submissives as well.

(in reply to Padriag)

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RE: Love & D/S -- TOP v. BOTTOM - 1/13/2006 12:00:02 AM

veronicaofML

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From: from iowa..now in wisconsin
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quote:

I work daily to push resentment and bitterness out of my life... these are emotions of weakness, you cannot resent someone unless you in some way feel less than them, you cannot be bitter without being resentful.
-----------------------

cant resent someone unless i fel less than?
now where did ya read this?
i resent people that act like their shit dont stink....but i damned sure dont feel less than.
i am better than they are...i know damned well some day we all do 6 by 6 by 3....
i resent know it all sumbitches...
i am better than they are because i know..no bastard knows everything.

where ya got this less than thing is beyond me..

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drugs sex and rock n roll,...drugs are good and so is the rock n roll, sex is over rated"
=============
"go straight to hell, do not pass go and do not collect $200"

(in reply to Sensualips)

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RE: Love & D/S -- TOP v. BOTTOM - 1/17/2006 9:33:07 AM

MistressAlexaS

Posts: 78
Joined: 1/13/2006
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As a Dominant and from a logical point of view its probably easier and more common not to love the person you are topping. Care about them, yes, but love....ehh love tends to complicate things and people generally try to avoid complications if possible.

With that said I love my switch BF he is the only man I ever switched with and vice versa. This is a new path for both of us so we are taking it slow and easy.

~Alexa

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