Being Polite (Full Version)

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thesugarplum -> Being Polite (1/26/2009 1:41:43 AM)

After casually talking to someone, via instant messenger or e mail, sometimes, I find that I am in no way interested in conversating with this person anymore. So I usually just ignore them. Some people are persistant though.

What is a polite way to let someone know you're no longer interested in them without hurting their feelings?

Thanks, Sugar



Usako -> RE: Being Polite (1/26/2009 2:16:39 AM)

Just be straight forward and if they can't take a hint block em.



IronBear -> RE: Being Polite (1/26/2009 2:34:07 AM)

FoF!!! (In commanding attitude)..



thesugarplum -> RE: Being Polite (1/26/2009 2:36:03 AM)

FoF? I could definitely use forum translation guide.



IronBear -> RE: Being Polite (1/26/2009 2:37:25 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: thesugarplum

FoF? I could definitely use forum translation guide.


F**k of Fred

I've head it said in a commanding voice froman expreemn;y lady like in whose mouth butter wouldn't melt (You Southern Gals know what I mean)



thesugarplum -> RE: Being Polite (1/26/2009 2:39:20 AM)

Merci Beaucoup!



bamagirl4u -> RE: Being Polite (1/26/2009 2:41:19 AM)

I tell them nicely--once!  If they persist I block them.  [:D] I admit--it feels good to know they can't spew all they like and I won't see it...lol.  You don't have to talk to anyone you don't want to.  If after telling them you aren't interested, they continue to persist..well...that waves a big ole red flag to me.  Good luck.



IronBear -> RE: Being Polite (1/26/2009 2:45:54 AM)

Avec plaisir



cagliostro -> RE: Being Polite (1/26/2009 2:58:29 AM)

Just like you said it there.  You list yourself as a submissive, so some will take that to mean you just need convincing.  This gives them away as fools and fakes, which means you shouldn't concern yourself with how you come across anymore.



Riesa -> RE: Being Polite (1/26/2009 3:38:36 AM)

i have this problem i talk to people on email on here, then they want to add me to msn etc, I tend to ask what for, as i am not looking for anything other than friends, they say thats all they want, I add them and within a couple of hours The person seems to think they are going to Dom me, or demand tasks etc. Usually i explain again, i am not looking  etc and if they dont take the hint i just block and delete, but some times they come back here give me grief, if it gets bad on here they go on block here...
(Others sites i use are same too, want more than friendship and get persistant no matter how many times i say sorry but no, read my profile lol.)
Riesa



littlewonder -> RE: Being Polite (1/26/2009 3:39:10 AM)

You can either just put them on ignore which is what I usually do because from my experience if they haven't gotten the hint when you don't respond to them then they eventually just become nasty..or you can just say "thank you for the conversation but I'm just not feeling any kind of connection. Good luck to you though." but my experience is they will still continue so again, just put them on ignore.



CatdeMedici -> RE: Being Polite (1/26/2009 4:41:48 AM)

"Dear Buddy, The votes are in and you're off the list!"
 
Seriously, I don't think there is a good or bad way--you try to be nice and they may persist and get nasty---you are abrupt--and the same can happen---people just don't like rejection and it seems here where there is the perception that if one must simply claims an orientation,  their yangs will just fall from the sky--rejection seems to come as a shocker.
 
But to thine own self be true.



Aneirin -> RE: Being Polite (1/26/2009 5:45:24 AM)

I understand what you are saying here, as I do like hurting feelings either, it is a dilemma. I used to if someone bothered me, just tell them I had to go, then put myself on stealth mode to them, that I felt was message enough.

Now, I rarely bother with the messenger service with new people, those I do have on it are friends from here, people I am familiar with, people I tend to trust. I don't give out my IM willy nilly, that may come after a fair few C-mails are exchanged and I have known a person more than a few weeks and I am interested in them more than just someone to chat to. The people I have whom I talk to quite regularly I have known for more than six months and three years in one case, two in another.

Yep, only three people, but I was always one to accept quality rather than quantity, I would rather have few very good friends than many aquaintances.





Metamorph -> RE: Being Polite (1/26/2009 6:46:18 AM)

I think it's poor form not to clearly let someone know that you're no longer interested if they continue to try and speak to you after communication channels have been opened. You may think you've given enough of a hint but these kinds of things don't translate well to the online medium.




sweetpeasmiles -> RE: Being Polite (1/26/2009 6:50:03 AM)

I normally just tell them politely that there is no connection,  and wish them luck in their search.  If it turns nasty then the iggy button it is.  Life's too short to be dealing with the clueless constantly.



SassySarijane -> RE: Being Polite (1/26/2009 6:50:05 AM)

You could tell them something along the lines of thank you for your time, but I don't feel it's going to go anywhere. Best wishes. Then when they start in on why why why, fat ugly bitch, didn't want you anyway, etc., etc., etc., just block and ignore without anymore responses.



IronBear -> RE: Being Polite (1/26/2009 7:18:25 AM)

OK Sugar,

One post you coluld send him after telling him no, is: 

Braccae illae virides cum subucula rosea et tunica Caledonia-quam elenganter concinnatur!  Braccae tuae aperiuntur - Those green pants go so well with that pink shirt and the plaid jacket! Your fly is open

Now if he doesn't take any notice or gets rude send this:

 Antiquis temporibus, nati tibi similes in rupibus ventosissimis exponebantur ad necem - In the good old days, children like you were left to perish on windswept crags



LaTigresse -> RE: Being Polite (1/26/2009 7:40:10 AM)

I rarely add anyone to my instant messenger stuff. That is for family and close friends and a select few that survive the long term screening process. I would rather talk to them on the phone before that sometimes.



kittinSol -> RE: Being Polite (1/26/2009 7:42:17 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: cagliostro

Just like you said it there.  You list yourself as a submissive, so some will take that to mean you just need convincing.  This gives them away as fools and fakes, which means you shouldn't concern yourself with how you come across anymore.


Whoever believes that a submissive 'just needs convincing', as if she didn't really know what she wanted, hasn't done his homework, definitely.



lusciouslips19 -> RE: Being Polite (1/26/2009 7:46:27 AM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: thesugarplum

After casually talking to someone, via instant messenger or e mail, sometimes, I find that I am in no way interested in conversating with this person anymore. So I usually just ignore them. Some people are persistant though.

What is a polite way to let someone know you're no longer interested in them without hurting their feelings?

Thanks, Sugar


Dont be in such a rush as to give out messaging info. Stay on C-mail or mail provided at the site. Thats what it is there for to let you retain your aninimity. But say its not a match and if they persist. Block. Dont worry about their feelings. Worry about YOU.



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