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collarme etiquette.... - 1/11/2006 7:59:18 AM   
Eric8


Posts: 10
Joined: 12/6/2005
Status: offline 		Ok Im sure the mods will want to put this somewhere else but since Im searching for a submissive it seems only logical that I ask a group of submissives.

When I am watching whos online and checking their profiles what the correct thing to do? Just invite for a chat or send a quick note? And whats the best way to do it without coming across as a total doofus?

Thanks,

Eric8
Profile   Post #: 1
RE: collarme etiquette.... - 1/11/2006 8:01:22 AM   
littleone35


Posts: 2828
Joined: 2/17/2005
Status: offline 		Well eric i wouls say send a quick note saying you saw thire porfile and would like to talk. Just be respectful in you letter and you will usually get some sort of response. Unless of course the girl is taken and you did not read her profile.

littleone

(in reply to Eric8)
Profile   Post #: 2
RE: collarme etiquette.... - 1/11/2006 8:05:28 AM   
Eric8


Posts: 10
Joined: 12/6/2005
Status: offline 		Well Ive done that but usually they have moved on by the time the mail gets to them.\
Again I dont want to come across as too pushy nor do I want to come across as the 45 year old sitting in the captain kirk chair in his mothers basement either...

thanks

Eric8

(in reply to Eric8)
Profile   Post #: 3
RE: collarme etiquette.... - 1/11/2006 8:08:46 AM   
LuckyAlbatross


Posts: 19224
Joined: 10/25/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Eric8

Well Ive done that but usually they have moved on by the time the mail gets to them.\
Again I dont want to come across as too pushy nor do I want to come across as the 45 year old sitting in the captain kirk chair in his mothers basement either...

thanks

Eric8

Such is life. Send a short polite email and then let it go.


_____________________________

Find stable partners, not a stable of partners.

"Sometimes my whore logic gets all fuzzy"- Californication

(in reply to Eric8)
Profile   Post #: 4
RE: collarme etiquette.... - 1/11/2006 9:25:47 AM   
typesgirl


Posts: 102
Joined: 10/17/2004
Status: offline 		Eric: I love your Cpt Kirk joke...soo many dweebs in momy's basement surfing for subs hahahah

I understand what you mean about people fleeting on and off the site and you can't be sure if they'll get the message before they sign off. I know that I get an email from the system when someone leaves me a message so if others have that turned on they'll get back to you eventually. If you want immediate feedback hang out in the chat room and look at profiles of people who might be there.

As others have said, short and honest messages that seem friendly and genuinely interested should get you a response from subs who are without a Master.
Good luck to you!
typesgirl

(in reply to LuckyAlbatross)
Profile   Post #: 5
RE: collarme etiquette.... - 1/11/2006 10:25:51 AM   
perverseangelic


Posts: 2625
Joined: 2/2/2004
From: Davis, Ca
Status: offline 		I'd much rather someone send me a note before sending a chat request.

Not 'cause I want to grant permision or anything, but because I have problems with the collarme chat and would rather move offsite than try to make it work.

I get a bit confused by someone who just sends me a chat request with no prior contact.

_____________________________

~in the begining it is always dark~

(in reply to typesgirl)
Profile   Post #: 6
RE: collarme etiquette.... - 1/11/2006 10:40:08 AM   
nelbot


Posts: 95
Joined: 9/6/2005
Status: offline 		I do not accept chat requests from strangers with whom I have had no prior communication to warrant it. I may be missing out but I categorically decline invitations to chat from someone I have not received an introductory message from and to which I have responded possitively that I would like to communicate further. I do not accpet requests from strangers ever, no wiggle room.

Not everyone is like me, of course, so your approach might work for you, I don't know but I don't think an invitation to chat is the best way to make your introduction.

_____________________________

In life there are no winners, only saints and sinners
of pleasure and pain both have their gain for
what is a devil but an angel in bondage?

(in reply to perverseangelic)
Profile   Post #: 7
RE: collarme etiquette.... - 1/11/2006 11:36:00 AM   
typesgirl


Posts: 102
Joined: 10/17/2004
Status: offline 		I'm sorry. Maybe i wasn't clear. i'm not suggesting that Eric initiate private chats with subs from the chat system. I'm just suggesting that it would be a good place to begin getting to know people in the public chat and that He would at least know that he/she is online at the time.

I agree completely that i don't accept just the random private chat request but i've become involved in many great conversations that started in a public chat room here.

typesgirl

(in reply to nelbot)
Profile   Post #: 8
RE: collarme etiquette.... - 1/11/2006 12:17:49 PM   
fastlane


Posts: 2159
Joined: 5/26/2005
Status: offline 		Why don't you try to establish your personality on the board first. Post a picture. See the personalities that you like on the board and contact them or wait and hope some will contact you?
Just my .02

Good luck Eric

_____________________________

Just because it hurts, doesn't necessarily make it a bad thing.

(in reply to typesgirl)
Profile   Post #: 9
RE: collarme etiquette.... - 1/11/2006 1:54:47 PM   
gingersnap7789


Posts: 32
Joined: 9/2/2005
Status: offline 		Instead of sending a chat request--which I would think would be ignored, send an e-mail. But don't send a short one saying, "hi" or "would you like to talk?" Send one that illustrates who you are, highlights your interests, and shows your sense of humor. When I'm accepting mail, I always respond to well-written e-mails, even if it's just to say thanks. I think most women find intelligence and personality worth a second look.

(in reply to Eric8)
Profile   Post #: 10
RE: collarme etiquette.... - 1/11/2006 3:36:11 PM   
Arpig


Posts: 9930
Joined: 1/3/2006
From: Increasingly further from reality
Status: offline 		Basically it is not unlike fishing...you throw out your lure and hope he/she bites. And as for looking like a doofus...hell we all look like a doofus at one time or another, and personally after the first 30 years, I just quite worrying about that, but then again, maybe I am just a doofus (my ex sure seems to think so )
And does it still count as dorky if it is a basement apartment, and not my Mum's basement?

_____________________________

Big man! Pig Man!
Ha Ha...Charade you are!

Why do they leave out the letter b on "Garage Sale" signs?

CM's #1 All-Time Also-Ran


(in reply to gingersnap7789)
Profile   Post #: 11
RE: collarme etiquette.... - 1/11/2006 4:30:52 PM   
EriaeMelody


Posts: 29
Joined: 1/10/2006
Status: offline 		Much like others have said, I never accept a chat request from someone unless they have at least made the effort to establish some kind of contact first. Send them a nice letter of introduction first, then let them know that you would like to take it further by going into chat. They can only answer 1 of 2 ways.

_____________________________

"It's just another day in paradise"

(in reply to Eric8)
Profile   Post #: 12
RE: collarme etiquette.... - 1/11/2006 6:07:09 PM   
sudja


Posts: 155
Joined: 2/8/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Eric8

Well Ive done that but usually they have moved on by the time the mail gets to them.\
Again I dont want to come across as too pushy nor do I want to come across as the 45 year old sitting in the captain kirk chair in his mothers basement either...

thanks

Eric8


You have Kirk's chair!

Woohoo! ::grin::

sudja


(in reply to Eric8)
Profile   Post #: 13
RE: collarme etiquette.... - 1/11/2006 6:35:31 PM   
krikket


Posts: 1183
Joined: 11/17/2004
From: Washington, DC Metro Area
Status: offline 		Since the CM chat part doesn't seem to like my computer i rarely respond to chat requests. A note works much better...

good luck in Your search...

(in reply to sudja)
Profile   Post #: 14
RE: collarme etiquette.... - 1/11/2006 7:21:55 PM   
classykindasassy


Posts: 291
Joined: 12/13/2005
Status: offline 		Eric, your profile has very little detail and no pic. I would not respond to such a profile, and i suspect that many others would decline to do so as well.

You say you want intimacy and that you are fine with the way you look. So, offer some intimacy in the way of real detail and a picture. Let's face it, a lot of us feel like idiots putting ourseves out there to someone who is virtually anonymous. You will get 75% more response if you actually let people know who you are, and what you look like.

All it takes to get a response from me is evidence that you read my profile and that you are in compliance with it. Not everyone works that way. A kind note is all it should take to get the ball rolling UNLESS the lady insists on seeing a pic first. I do insist on that.

_____________________________

"The less I seek my source for some definitive, the closer I am to fine." -The Indigo Girls

(in reply to krikket)
Profile   Post #: 15
RE: collarme etiquette.... - 1/11/2006 8:20:05 PM   
seaturtle50


Posts: 382
Joined: 12/28/2005
Status: offline
quote:

whats the best way to do it without coming across as a total doofus


A: Don't be a total doofus

(in reply to classykindasassy)
Profile   Post #: 16
RE: collarme etiquette.... - 1/12/2006 9:59:10 AM   
mystictryst


Posts: 125
Joined: 9/6/2005
Status: offline 		In my recent exploration of personal sites and the influx of responses, my general thoughts on the matter are this:

1. I do not respond to chat requests
2. Notes containing suggestive pick ups/fantasies/email addresses to chat off site
3. Requests for pictures - I will share when I'm ready - if you want pics, I assume you are looking to get laid/get off
4. Obviously didn't read my profile

I will respond to notes if I feel that we've something in common - I always read the profiles of the sender, details are good, long lengthy descriptions of body parts aren't. I also tend to dislike "sex" pics or nude pics - but I'm an odd duck sometimes!


(in reply to Eric8)
Profile   Post #: 17
RE: collarme etiquette.... - 1/12/2006 10:09:27 AM   
miticantenslaved


Posts: 195
Joined: 12/28/2005
Status: offline
quote:

And does it still count as dorky if it is a basement apartment, and not my Mum's basement?


Prolly not....*but ponders a while* Nope, definitely not! (unless You have a Captain Kirks chair?)

Jugglers will tell you that juggling with items that are identical is always easier than a mixture of all shapes and sizes. This is even the case with chainsaws, although of course when the juggler misses the first chainsaw it is only the start of his problems. Some more will be along very shortly. [Jingo]

~miti

_____________________________

~If that which you seek you do not find within, you will not find, without *D. Valiente*~


(in reply to Arpig)
Profile   Post #: 18
RE: collarme etiquette.... - 1/12/2006 11:41:55 AM   
MHOO314


Posts: 3628
Joined: 9/26/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Eric8

Well Ive done that but usually they have moved on by the time the mail gets to them.\
Again I dont want to come across as too pushy nor do I want to come across as the 45 year old sitting in the captain kirk chair in his mothers basement either...
thanks

Eric8


ooohhh that is priceless! From a Dominant prespective, I prefer a polite note, I find an invite to chat rude, especially when My profile clearly says not to do that.


_____________________________

SLUTS: Southern Ladies Under Tremendous Stress...

Mistress Hathor


(in reply to Eric8)
Profile   Post #: 19
RE: collarme etiquette.... - 1/12/2006 12:17:15 PM   
yourMissTress


Posts: 1665
Joined: 6/14/2005
From: Nashville, TN
Status: offline 		Send an email that gets thier attention...and no I'm not advocating the "On your knees, bitch!" wanker-dom email.

Show them a little bit of you and what you are about. Include a G-rated picture with your initial email, or request that they take a look at your profile.

If they don't respond to the first email, send a second one, polite and courteous reminding them that you are interested in talking with them.

If they don't respond to the second email...move on.

The ratio of men to women here on Collar me speaks volumes about just how patient and dilligent you may have to be.

_____________________________

Tress


"If you have to tell people that you are a lady, you are not." My Grandmother


(in reply to Eric8)
Profile   Post #: 20
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