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New to the Scene - 1/30/2009 11:27:22 AM

sthmanchesterboy

Posts: 2
Joined: 1/28/2009
Status: offline

Hi My names Jonny im a sub male looking for a mistress, thing is im very new to this whole scene and want to know the best way to go about submitting to a mistress.

All ideas will be welcome.

Thanks

J

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RE: New to the Scene - 1/30/2009 11:34:27 AM

Nikitaa

Posts: 416
Joined: 1/26/2009
Status: offline

When mistress gives you command you do.

(in reply to sthmanchesterboy)

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RE: New to the Scene - 1/30/2009 11:41:01 AM

Sanguinarian

Posts: 474
Joined: 8/13/2008
Status: offline

Well first ( and my own personal pet peeve ) Never assume that being submissive by A) degrading yourself, B) calling her by a Title, C) begging to be her slave on the very first chat...( omg, I could go through the entire alphabet twice on this, so I will cut it short now) is going to please her.

Granted, such things do please some, but not all potential female Dominants. Some like being called Mistress, some don't. I personally think it inappropriate to be called Mistress if I do not actually the one calling me such, nor do I think it appropriate for them to debase themselves to me before perimeters are established. A Dominant, be they male or female, are human. I just think it wiser to get to know them as such first.

I bet I will get quite a few disparaging comments on that, but what the hell? :P My opinion, not everyone elses anyway. :D

(in reply to Nikitaa)

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RE: New to the Scene - 1/30/2009 12:25:51 PM

Voodali

Posts: 255
Joined: 10/2/2007
Status: offline

Don't think of her as just a "Mistress", rather take the time to look at her full profile, and truly pay attention when she types/speaks to you. She will be used to boys who see her as a caricature Dominatrix, ready to fulfill their every kink. So when you see her as a person, and show her the interest you would show a good friend, it will set you somewhat apart from the hordes of do me subs.
Every Mistress is different, and they all want to be served in the ways that make them happy, so there is no universal answer to this, really.
Oh, and generally, if she hasn't asked to see your winkie, don't show it to her :p

(in reply to Sanguinarian)

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RE: New to the Scene - 1/30/2009 1:58:58 PM

OttersSwim

Posts: 2860
Joined: 9/1/2008
Status: offline

Welcome to the forums.

Your future Mistress is a person first so my advice is to approach her like you would any woman out in the vanilla dating scene. Treat her like a person, not a Domina. She has interests outside of BDSM, find out what those are. Talk about your life and ask a bit about hers.

Don't trot out your list of what you want her to do to you or not do to you. Plenty of time for all that once you determine if you are even compatible as two human beings.

Evaluate -her- for compatability in a relationship - which is what you are forging. Regardless of whether you end up 24/7, or meeting twice a year, it is a relationship and should be treated as such.

If you set up a meeting, show up, be on time, and provide a safe environment for Her to evaluate you - think and act from your head and your heart, not your cock.

Read a lot here and really think about what sort of relationship you are really looking for. Be able to relate that in 100 words or less.

Be polite, be honest, be yourself.

Hope that helps!

_____________________________

I am on a journey of authenticity and self.

(in reply to sthmanchesterboy)

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RE: New to the Scene - 1/30/2009 2:26:09 PM

Madame4a

Posts: 2045
Joined: 2/4/2008
From: Washington, DC area
Status: offline

as usual.. you rock!

what he said...

_____________________________

You're crazy bitch
But you f*ck so good, I'm on top of it
When I dream, I'm doing you all night
Scratches all down my back to keep me right on

(in reply to OttersSwim)

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Post #: 6