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RE: Premature Ejactulation - 2/5/2009 12:48:30 PM   
cjan


Posts: 3513
Joined: 2/21/2008
Status: offline 		Easy...it's a matter of mind over splatter. Practice.

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(in reply to aravain)
Profile   Post #: 21
RE: Premature Ejactulation - 2/5/2009 1:00:08 PM   
BKSir


Posts: 4037
Joined: 4/8/2008
From: Salt Lake City, UT
Status: offline 		I tend to suffer from premature articulation.  The words come out before I have a chance to think about what I'm saying... >.<

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(in reply to cjan)
Profile   Post #: 22
RE: Premature Ejactulation - 2/5/2009 1:02:38 PM   
aravain


Posts: 1211
Joined: 8/26/2008
Status: offline 		I think it depends on the nature of it.

If he's orgasming, then it's something that he can 'practice'. If he's not orgasming when he ejaculates... well, that might need a look-see from a doc.

(in reply to cjan)
Profile   Post #: 23
RE: Premature Ejactulation - 2/5/2009 1:04:32 PM   
LadyTeazer


Posts: 225
Joined: 4/1/2007
Status: offline 		First of all - very important question.  Does your hubby WANT to fix this problem?   Or is it just a problem for you, because he is of the mindset "well, I got mine, too bad about you"?  If  he doesn't see it as a problem, good luck.......

Have you tried using a 'desensitising' cream on him?  I don't know if those actually work, but it might be worth a try.

The best technique I know of  is basically a "tease and denial/delay" tactic.  Allow him to thrust, but when he feels that he is on the edge of cumming, make him STOP thrusting immediately and either - A) stay inside you WITHOUT moving until the urge passes, and he regains control, or, B) pull out until the urge passes and he regains control.  Then he can enter you again, start from square one, and repeat the process.  This will take time, and probably be frustrating, so be patient.

As was already mentioned, having him do the male version of Kegel exercises wouldn't hurt either.

Another possibility to train him to last longer is "aversion therapy".  But that can be *very* tricky.  When he cums too quickly, verbalize your displeasure and do something to him that he really hates (blow cigarette smoke in his face, tickle him somewhere, whatever).   And when he does last longer - even if it is one stroke - reward him with abundant verbal praise, and do something he really likes.   When you are verbalizing your displeasure, you have to be careful that it does not turn into humiliation, because that could backfire.  Say something like "oh, George, I am so disappointed that you couldn't last very long this time", rather than "George! you stupid pig!  what's wrong with you?". 

    Just thought of something else.  Has your hubby 'always' been quick on the draw?  Or is this a recent developement?  If it is something recent, chances are something between you has changed (one of you has gained/lost weight, or have a health issue that is new), or maybe he is stressed about something external (his job, a friend in crisis?).   Sit down (NOT before or right after sex), talk about it, try to figure out what the problem is, and how to work around it.  



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(in reply to Lynnxz)
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RE: Premature Ejactulation - 2/5/2009 1:13:54 PM   
LadyTeazer


Posts: 225
Joined: 4/1/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: BKSir

I tend to suffer from premature articulation.  The words come out before I have a chance to think about what I'm saying... >.<


HAH!!!!   Good one!  I gotta remember that......

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~LadyTeazer~



"... I can bring you pain, I can bring you sudden pleasure..."


Please, help shelter animals. It will only cost you a few seconds of your time.
http://www.theanimalrescuesite.com/tpc/ERA_110508_ARS
> Thank You!! <

(in reply to BKSir)
Profile   Post #: 25
RE: Premature Ejactulation - 2/5/2009 1:17:25 PM   
Nikitaa


Posts: 416
Joined: 1/26/2009
Status: offline 		Thicker condoms or if he wear two condoms this may solve problem. This makes him less sensitive to touch and may slow him down. Worked for one man I with but not perfect solution.

If this not work then beat him with a stick when he cums too fast. <---------okay, maybe not good but I enjoy.

(in reply to April76)
Profile   Post #: 26
RE: Premature Ejactulation - 2/5/2009 1:32:47 PM   
aravain


Posts: 1211
Joined: 8/26/2008
Status: offline 		*SPITS*

Nonono, two condoms is BAD if you're using them as a contraceptive or anti-STI protection!

If you're JUST using them to reduce sensitivity, I STILL wouldn't do it! It's not a good idea! It makes the likelihood for them to rip and tear skyrocket (if not 100%)!

(in reply to Nikitaa)
Profile   Post #: 27
RE: Premature Ejactulation - 2/5/2009 2:54:54 PM   
thornhappy


Posts: 8596
Joined: 12/16/2006
Status: offline 		Ladies at the Chicken Ranch use 2 condoms on guys when sex has gone on for awhile, or is particularly vigorous, and they get no breakage.

(in reply to aravain)
Profile   Post #: 28
RE: Premature Ejactulation - 2/5/2009 2:56:11 PM   
CatdeMedici


Posts: 2257
Joined: 10/20/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: BKSir

I tend to suffer from premature articulation.  The words come out before I have a chance to think about what I'm saying... >.<


ROFL, ok this is priceless and something I can totally relate to!

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(in reply to BKSir)
Profile   Post #: 29
RE: Premature Ejactulation - 2/5/2009 3:04:16 PM   
zenny


Posts: 275
Joined: 2/13/2008
Status: offline 		I assume this is using a strapon or dildo of some sort? I would assume that they use rather tight fitting condoms of their toys and as such they stay in place well and don't move much as a dildo doesn't get softer or harder as intercourse fluctuates. This isn't the case for a penis. Also, using a too tight condom can be quite painful. Combining it with another would only be worse and to combine it with a lesser fitting one would not be too smart either. While I wonder how accurate the statistics are I do understand the premise and personally would rather not increase the possibility.

(in reply to thornhappy)
Profile   Post #: 30
RE: Premature Ejactulation - 2/5/2009 3:07:47 PM   
aravain


Posts: 1211
Joined: 8/26/2008
Status: offline 		Using two or more increased the rate of *micro-tears* (I should have been more explicit, apologies) caused by friction.

(in reply to thornhappy)
Profile   Post #: 31
RE: Premature Ejactulation - 2/5/2009 3:15:54 PM   
DesFIP


Posts: 25191
Joined: 11/25/2007
From: Apple County NY
Status: offline 		First, have him see a doctor in case there is a physical reason.
Secondly, stop thinking of his orgasm as being the end of sex. He has hands and a mouth, try toys as well. Have him satisfy you without entering you first and then when you're done he can penetrate. Beyond that, cock rings.

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Profile   Post #: 32
RE: Premature Ejactulation - 2/5/2009 4:19:13 PM   
windchymes


Posts: 9410
Joined: 4/18/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: thornhappy

Ladies at the Chicken Ranch use 2 condoms on guys when sex has gone on for awhile, or is particularly vigorous, and they get no breakage.


And you know this.....how???

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Profile   Post #: 33
RE: Premature Ejactulation - 2/5/2009 4:47:23 PM   
kiwisub12


Posts: 4742
Joined: 1/11/2006
Status: offline 		My ex had premature ejaculation - the sex was fine (if uninspiring) before we were married - as soon as the knot was tied, every time i started to enjoy intercourse, he would come. It lasted for 3 years until i had my first um. I always assumed it was my fault for various and assundry reasons, but in therapy, i was informed he had a madona/whore complex - a whore was to enjoy sex with - as in unmarried, the madona was to be the mother of his children and shouldn't enjoy sex, so anytime he thought i was enjoying it - he came and stopped me cold.

It worked too - after three years of not enjoying sex, i was thoroughly conditioned out of enjoyment of sex.  By the end of our marraige, he could have pumped all day and i wouldn't have enjoyed a moment of it   -  and on his part, it was all subconscious. He had no idea what he was doing.

So - you might also think of therapy if there is no physical reason.   See a urologist as soon as possible.

(in reply to windchymes)
Profile   Post #: 34
RE: Premature Ejactulation - 2/5/2009 4:55:01 PM   
MsSpankhardSk


Posts: 63
Joined: 8/19/2004
From: Saskatchewan
Status: offline 		Buy a male strap on harness until he fixes this...whether its due to medical issues or lack of practicing kegel exercises. That is a temporary fix and you get to be fucked with a strap on...versus having the five minute wonder. Its humiliating for him to have to please you without any gratification/penetration, and should emphasize just how important those kegel exercises actually areeeee.

Whether he wants to fix this...or not...the strap on will be his motivator for penetration. You can make that a prerequisite for ever having him enter you again. *evil laugh  Now I think I want to go shopping for one.

< Message edited by MsSpankhardSk -- 2/5/2009 5:00:32 PM >

(in reply to windchymes)
Profile   Post #: 35
RE: Premature Ejactulation - 2/5/2009 4:56:40 PM   
BalletBob


Posts: 1645
Joined: 7/14/2005
Status: offline 		Tie a sock with an ICE CUBE around his Cookies ! Or have him cum a few times, till he can't anymore. He says it hurts him, so use a Hollow Penis over his, then you can still have fun, even though he can't.

Or instead of a thick condom like Nikitaa mentioned, use a Thick Balloon.

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(in reply to April76)
Profile   Post #: 36
RE: Premature Ejactulation - 2/5/2009 6:59:06 PM   
TheHeretic


Posts: 19100
Joined: 3/25/2007
From: California, USA
Status: offline 		      Keep up. 

     You're Dom?  Try milking a half hour before you want sex.

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Profile   Post #: 37
RE: Premature Ejactulation - 2/6/2009 8:56:28 AM   
Nikitaa


Posts: 416
Joined: 1/26/2009
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: BalletBob

Tie a sock with an ICE CUBE around his Cookies ! Or have him cum a few times, till he can't anymore. He says it hurts him, so use a Hollow Penis over his, then you can still have fun, even though he can't.

Or instead of a thick condom like Nikitaa mentioned, use a Thick Balloon.

There are better uses for ice cubes. ;-)

(in reply to BalletBob)
Profile   Post #: 38
RE: Premature Ejactulation - 2/6/2009 9:40:51 AM   
T1981


Posts: 557
Joined: 12/6/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: aravain

I have the opposite experience, Lynnxz 

I HATE extended (longer than 10 minutes) sessions of intercourse (though extended oral is just plain fun). It feels really good for about that amount of time, then after that soreness (usually from position) starts to set in. The bigger the guy I've been with, the longer they freaking last (and, in general, the longer they LIKE to take, too for some reason extended sex seems to be such a turn on ).

Me? I would much rather have a bunch of "short" sessions throughout the day  (15-20 minutes of foreplay, 10 minutes or less of trying to actively get off, either by manual, oral OR anal, for each one). Then again, I'm basically a bunny.



I'm in that boat of preferance as well - too long (anything over 10 minutes) just makes me sore and tired. There are nights when I just grin and bear it, and other nights when I tell my husband "Sorry, sweetie, but I can't do this anymore. Let me finish you off another way."

He always seems happy no matter which way it ends up, so I count myself lucky there!


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(in reply to aravain)
Profile   Post #: 39
RE: Premature Ejactulation - 2/6/2009 11:19:21 AM   
April76


Posts: 4
Joined: 2/5/2009
Status: offline 		This has been going on for a long time-we have been married for 6 years and it was happening before that.....

(in reply to T1981)
Profile   Post #: 40
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