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RE: Question about Crazy People - 2/7/2009 8:14:43 PM

QuixoticErrant

Posts: 260
Joined: 2/1/2009
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quote:

ORIGINAL: bamagirl4u

Move and know you learned a good lesson...hope it improves for you. I have met someone from here and he is really nice! But only after talking a longgggggggg time...best of luck to you..

Thank you kindly

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Post #: 41

RE: Question about Crazy People - 2/7/2009 8:26:25 PM

oceanwynds

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Joined: 8/24/2006
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You have to take people with a grain of salt, Quixotic. When I am posting, I try to post so it shows in favor of Sir. There are moments, sometimes days though that I can be rude. I try not to be though but it happens. I figure that is the case with many others too. I don't swear because I am not permitted too, and this too would be a reflection on Sir. IMHO, if there was no Sir, I would still carry myself the same way. It just a better way to be in my world.

Best of luck, and please don't be so hard on yourself.

oceanwynds

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Post #: 42

RE: Question about Crazy People - 2/7/2009 8:27:03 PM

Nikitaa

Posts: 416
Joined: 1/26/2009
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I said sorry. You did not have to block. I only wanted one night stand with no obligation. I did not know you strict church person.
Is your brother still in the military? Give him my number.

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Post #: 43

RE: Question about Crazy People - 2/7/2009 9:53:51 PM

QuixoticErrant

Posts: 260
Joined: 2/1/2009
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quote:

ORIGINAL: Nikitaa

I said sorry. You did not have to block. I only wanted one night stand with no obligation. I did not know you strict church person.
Is your brother still in the military? Give him my number.

now that is funny!

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Post #: 44

RE: Question about Crazy People - 2/8/2009 4:02:18 AM

CatdeMedici

Posts: 2257
Joined: 10/20/2008
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quote:

ORIGINAL: QuixoticErrant

I assure you, I am talking to other people. What prompted me to post this was that I am getting mails from others about it now. I am annoyed, and I wanted to see if others have had experience with things like this and find out how they dealt with it.

Welcome to High School Musical 4: Cliquing on the Internet

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Post #: 45

RE: Question about Crazy People - 2/8/2009 10:18:51 AM

Jeptha

Posts: 780
Joined: 9/18/2008
From: Portland, Oregon
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quote:

ORIGINAL: QuixoticErrant

I asked for such ridiculous things as what she was interested in outside of BDSM and to see her photo before meeting her....

My point was, that to some that *is* a ridiculous request.
I get that you were being facetious when you said that because you think you are the most normal and reasonable person in the world. You're not an internet "bottom feeder" like these other freeloaders.

The most typical response I used to get was a one-liner request for a photo.
Which I would regard as shallow and lazy in the extreme.

I understand the need for photos. But you have to supply some kind of content along with the request. In other words there has to be an exchange of some kind. Otherwise it's just spam of a sort.

My point in mentioning this is that I'm trying to get you to consider the possibility that nobody's a bat-shit crazy bottom feeder; we just have different ideas of what constitutes a reasonable request as far as communication and possibly meeting goes.

And my "for instance" was that I consider the blank photo request unacceptable.
However, the flip side of that is all the photo requesters who thought I was a fake for not sending one.

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Post #: 46

RE: Question about Crazy People - 2/8/2009 11:45:51 AM

Maya2001

Posts: 1656
Joined: 8/22/2007
From: Woodstock ONT,CANADA
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quote:

I asked for such ridiculous things as what she was interested in outside of BDSM and to see her photo before meeting her.

Did you provide your photo before demanding to see her photo??

Many woman do not want to get caught up in online chats because they often do not materialize into meets which were promised just online domination..which she may have got caught in just recently ..therefore wants to meet first to ensure you are not just some wanker who wants to play Dom behind a computer screen.

the problem is we are only hearing your side of the story ..so hard to comment on why she is reacting so negatively.could it be she is crazy??..yes ..but it is also possible there is more to the story than we are hearing.

so it may not be that she is crazy but gun shy after being burned

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Post #: 47

RE: Question about Crazy People - 2/8/2009 12:36:52 PM

domiguy

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Crazy people....Hmmmm. I think I would like to fuck a crazy person. Not someone who is just a tad "off." I am talking about someone being full blown, toys in the attic, bat shit crazy.

If you suvived can you imagine the shit that they would say? Why isn't this legal? Am I alone here?

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Post #: 48

RE: Question about Crazy People - 2/8/2009 1:07:21 PM

came4U

Posts: 3572
Joined: 1/23/2007
From: London, Ontario
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I tend to agree about crazy f*ckers. Crazy men seem to have the most honest (downright brutal) fuck sessions.

Sometimes they just make the average guy look bad.

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Post #: 49

RE: Question about Crazy People - 2/8/2009 3:30:33 PM

MasterMDOM

Posts: 15
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Am siding with Quixotic on this one. He asked an honest question. Let's not start another episode of 'Blame the Victim'

Peace!

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Post #: 50

RE: Question about Crazy People - 2/8/2009 5:56:10 PM

sparkyRBF

Posts: 157
Joined: 2/23/2007
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quote:

ORIGINAL: QuixoticErrant

The question I would like to repose is, how many truly unpleasant people have you encountered on here? I can say in my short time here, that I have met some very kindred spirits that I like quite a lot. That said, what are other's experiences with the "bottom feeders" as it was so well phrased in someone else's reply.

I think i get what you are wanting. In a nutshell you are looking for a shortcut easy way to cut out the crazy.   Let me help you. There isn't one.
Maybe focusing on what is important to you will help you find who is important to you.

On the bright side.. I've met alot of people from collarme and 99% were positive experiences.   Only one real crazy person and it took a year to figure that out, so don't feel so bad.

And a comment as to why she may not have posted on here. for "ExSteelAgain" Here's a news flash!!! Not everyone on collarme comes to the boards. I was on collarme for two years before i read my first thread.   I also noticed i don't see alot of the names on the boards in the chat rooms and vice versa. Just a thought.

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Post #: 51

RE: Question about Crazy People - 2/8/2009 6:43:04 PM

QuixoticErrant

Posts: 260
Joined: 2/1/2009
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quote:

ORIGINAL: Jeptha

quote:

ORIGINAL: QuixoticErrant

I asked for such ridiculous things as what she was interested in outside of BDSM and to see her photo before meeting her....

My point was, that to some that *is* a ridiculous request.
I get that you were being facetious when you said that because you think you are the most normal and reasonable person in the world. You're not an internet "bottom feeder" like these other freeloaders.

The most typical response I used to get was a one-liner request for a photo.
Which I would regard as shallow and lazy in the extreme.

I understand the need for photos. But you have to supply some kind of content along with the request. In other words there has to be an exchange of some kind. Otherwise it's just spam of a sort.

My point in mentioning this is that I'm trying to get you to consider the possibility that nobody's a bat-shit crazy bottom feeder; we just have different ideas of what constitutes a reasonable request as far as communication and possibly meeting goes.

And my "for instance" was that I consider the blank photo request unacceptable.
However, the flip side of that is all the photo requesters who thought I was a fake for not sending one.

Not that it really matters, but, she had given me no information about her at all and was demanding a meet. It is not ridiculous to know something like, what they do, what they like, and what they look like before meeting, and of course if she had sent one, I would have sent one back. The reality is that she was playing whatever game she felt she needed to play. As it is now, it really, really does not matter.

I'm talking rather nicely to some very interesting and communicative people now.

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Post #: 52

RE: Question about Crazy People - 2/8/2009 11:51:40 PM

BondageBarbieX

Posts: 495
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Obsessed a little?

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Post #: 53

RE: Question about Crazy People - 2/9/2009 12:21:12 AM

DominantDamsel

Posts: 42
Joined: 5/14/2008
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quote:

would like very much to redirect the discussion a little more towards the: OK I really am new to the idea of looking online for partners. I have had many partners that I met through more face to face means, but, I am rather new to the whole doing this online thing, and I am mostly here out of curiosity. Clearly, there is a matter of trial and error, and just as clearly, I should have not played along with this person in even the slightest and just obeyed my gut.

The question I would like to repose is, how many truly unpleasant people have you encountered on here? I can say in my short time here, that I have met some very kindred spirits that I like quite a lot. That said, what are other's experiences with the "bottom feeders" as it was so well phrased in someone else's reply.

There are all kinds here. It's really no different from any singles site online. That being said, there are some strange ones out here and everyone is right that it's best not to be too informative about the personal stuff until you know the person fairly well. Occasionally one can pick up the stray troll or stalker-type. The best advice for online dating is to brush up on your patience. You'll need it. You can normally tell a lot about a person based upon how willing they are to correspond regularly for a little before moving to the telephone. If they are still interested after several weeks of correspondance, and they haven't set off any red flags, you might have yourself someone who is actually dateable/playable... ymmv. Happy fishing!

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RE: Question about Crazy People - 2/9/2009 12:58:16 AM

ThatDamnedPanda

Posts: 6060
Joined: 1/26/2009
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quote:

ORIGINAL: domiguy

Crazy people....Hmmmm. I think I would like to fuck a crazy person. Not someone who is just a tad "off." I am talking about someone being full blown, toys in the attic, bat shit crazy.

If you suvived can you imagine the shit that they would say? Why isn't this legal? Am I alone here?

Take my word, man, that's one wish you probably don't ever want to come true. Been there; spent 5 years there.... you really don't want to be there.

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Post #: 55

RE: Question about Crazy People - 2/9/2009 10:13:39 AM

ResidentSadist

Posts: 12580
Joined: 2/11/2007
From: a mean old Daddy, but I like you - Joni Mitchell
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. . . . halo . . . halo . . . Is this moderator # 1? I called to suggest you have a special icon that indicates whether your forum members are crazy or not! <voice crackles over long distance connection> “Um…. We already do. The crazy people use their profile photos. Didn’t mod 11 post that in rules like I asked her to?”
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
If everyone wasn’t truly crazy, I’d be bored to death. The only trick in life to making successful connections or relationships is finding the flavors of crazy you like best.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
As far as predicting whether you will like someone’s particular brand of crazy in advance, online, through a medium that does not convey body language … good luck with that! I can clock* someone in 10 seconds after I meet them and I know if they are a nester or nomad, a survivor or victim, a leader or follower, whether they know the difference between sex and love and if they are self aware enough to enjoy their own passions. It is all very apparent in how they hold themselves, the tone of their voice and how they meet your eyes with theirs.

Online. . . ack. You get none of those indicators and only taste testing will tell. That is why I don’t typically “hunt” here . . . and on the rare occasion someone of interest sneaks in between all the gazelles I have to spit out, I use audio and video so I can hear the inflection of their voice and see their body language.

*note: clock = read their major personality stereotype

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Post #: 56

RE: Question about Crazy People - 2/9/2009 10:25:07 AM

NYLass

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Isn't dealing with internet crazies the subject of "The Collarme Guide To Meeting Partners" chapter 4?

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Post #: 57

RE: Question about Crazy People - 2/9/2009 6:28:33 PM

Jeptha

Posts: 780
Joined: 9/18/2008
From: Portland, Oregon
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quote:

ORIGINAL: QuixoticErrant

...I would like very much to redirect the discussion a little more towards the: OK I really am new to the idea of looking online for partners.

...The question I would like to repose is, how many truly unpleasant people have you encountered on here? ...

You mentioned that you ignored some of your intuitive early warning signals.
I do that, too.

I recall once meeting someone from the net. They seemed clever enough, and rational enough, though terse in their communication. So we met. I did not think things were going well. Our conversation was not flowing very smoothly. I was thinking about when and how to end the date when she asked me, "So, how do you think it's going?"

I committed a sort of lie of omission and replied, " (pause, shrug)...I'm having a nice time."

(Not a complete fib: I was enjoying relaxing, being off my feet and having a few drinks at the weird bar that we met at.)

And, for the first time that evening, she smiled.

Anyway, it turned out we were together for about ten months. Not a long time, perhaps, but still, it was a good experience.
We're still pretty good friends.

That's why, while I don't want to ignore intuition altogether, I sometimes want to over-ride the little shadows of doubt to really find out for sure.

There are times (as you've found out) that you do want to trust your intuition though.
I think it's just a matter of fine tuning.
Which unfortunately, usually comes from experience (both good and bad.)

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RE: Question about Crazy People - 2/9/2009 6:43:05 PM

lunadancer

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