Breaking Contracts

Breaking Contracts (Full Version)

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SentForu -> Breaking Contracts (8/12/2004 8:29:09 PM)
I have read a lot about contracts. I understand then a bit, but some I don't. Example: Your and your Master/Dom have decided to make out a contract. In this contract, you both have stated you were to be monogamous. Say he did not live up to his end of the agreement. Would that give the slave the right to break the contract and leave? Or, would she still have to be released to remain honourable? I know they are not legally binding contracts. Yet, if you were to break one without being released, you would be looked down on. Do I understand correctly? Thanks, Myra

Sylverdawn -> RE: Breaking Contracts (8/12/2004 10:41:28 PM)
Myra.. I hate to beat this drum again.. but it depends.. it depends on the community you interact with and what the contracts purpose is. For some people a contract can be for a specific period of time... a training contract, a specific period of service or a neogitated scene and there is a natural end to it so no offical release is required. Others have commitment contracts for without a built in time frame in which the boundries are clearly defined for the relationship. For me the sub/slave/bottom always retains the right of final refusal. I would not look down on a person who simply said "enough I cant do this ".. and walked away. It is not my place to judge what is right for another person even if that person is my submissive; in tht sense only he/she can say what is right inside their own skin. I would hope that decision would be given sufficent thought and weighed with a clear head before it was done. I would also hope that they would ask for release and that would be given but if they felt they couldnt they could break it by removing their own collar and clearing out if that was the path chosen. I dont think I would look down on them. Recently here a slave removed his collar due to an ongoing family situation one in which he felt he couldnt ask for release. People said he should have gone to another Dominant in the community and asked them to release him. I disagreed. He has the right to remove his own collar. He was trying to make as little fuss as possible by not adding to the current drama and move on quietly with his life. He used his right to know what was right for himself and for that I personally commended him. Other dont share my view... C'est la vie.. Dawn.

Estring -> RE: Breaking Contracts (8/12/2004 11:45:58 PM)
Why would you be concerned about a contract that is useless anyway? I think the matter of trust being broken would be the important concern.

QnofH3arts -> RE: Breaking Contracts (8/13/2004 12:37:49 AM)
In this example, the sub/slave would not be breaking the contract by leaving, with or without release. The Dominant already broke the contract. A D/s contract is only as binding as the honor and integrity of the two bound by it. There will always be people who agree and others who disagree regardless of reasoning. You have to do what is right for you. You don't owe anyone explanations or excuses.

afmvdp -> RE: Breaking Contracts (8/13/2004 1:01:23 AM)
Is it contracted that you are to be his sole submissive/slave? If not then he didn't break a contract. If he did directly tell you that you are both to remain the only ones in each others lives then he did break his personal trust bond with you. The contract is frivolity and meaningless, the broken trust is not by far.

iwillserveu -> RE: Breaking Contracts (8/13/2004 2:09:09 AM)
I've got agree with Sylerdawn. If the contract says they will be monogomous but the Domina decides she wants to "try" polywhatever and the slave leaves and she insists he is her slave until she releases him you will find. A: 45% say a slave is a slave and behaved unslave-like and has no right to be a slave. B: 45% say the Domina behaved unhonorably and the slave is within agreed upon rights ("rights for a slave? preposterous?" "Lets discuss contracts and sub versus slave again") C: 10% do not care either way. Like all things the answer varies greatly with who you ask. I'd say "B" but that is just one opinion. I bet many will disagree.

SentForu -> RE: Breaking Contracts (8/13/2004 4:47:40 AM)
Well, from what I have read so far, a contract holds a certain amount of honor? (not sure if that's the right term) The question was revolved around if after the trust was broken, would the submissive/slave be viewed as dishonorable within the BDSM community. Of course, I know what I would do. I'd probably have no problem leaving in a situation like that. That was just a "what if" question. Helping me to understand the purpose of contracts. How seriously they are taken, and the like. Thanks ya'll, for the input, Myra

stormiKnightBEAR -> RE: Breaking Contracts (8/13/2004 6:31:34 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: SentForu I have read a lot about contracts. I understand then a bit, but some I don't. Example: Your and your Master/Dom have decided to make out a contract. In this contract, you both have stated you were to be monogamous. Say he did not live up to his end of the agreement. Would that give the slave the right to break the contract and leave? Or, would she still have to be released to remain honourable? I know they are not legally binding contracts. Yet, if you were to break one without being released, you would be looked down on. Do I understand correctly? Thanks, Myra Myra, May this girl ask if this is a leather based relationship? In Leather BDSM, regardless of circumstance according to Old Guard, the slave would have to ask for release. If denied then she/he could present it to a Dominant that is ....respected by or held in high regard and present the problem and make it known that release had been asked for. At that point, it would be acceptable for the slave to remove a collar. To remove it without asking for release, is not going to cause you to be banned or black listed, but to some it shows, lack of respect for the collar and history, and unfortunately the dominant that gave the collar. Do not miss understand, this girl truly believes that a lying Dominant or one that is unable to be truthful and upfront no matter how it hurts is not worthy of being worried about. But please remember that is this girl's opinion. The only advise this girl can offer comes from her own personal experience, after a very nasty public break-up. This girl walked from the community that she had called home for 6 months due to embarrassment and to escape the venom that was being spread. The dom in question had been a friend first, someone the sub admired and respected for about 2 yrs actually before becoming his. It was embarrassing to know that this girl was that stupid. After about 6 months this girl re-emerged, to her surprise to a loud well received welcoming. Lots of hugs, lots of "we are so glad you are back" and "It's about time girl!!". What was amazing, was that this dominant in question was on the "inner" circle when the girl left, now however, he was very much to the side. Bottom line was that by keeping the chin up, the mouth shut, and not responding to the mud slinging, this girl had proven her worth according to one Elder, and that in fact it showed that this girl had listened when given answers about protocol and roots of Leather. Just this girl's 5 cents. Good luck and if you need a shoulder, this girl is here for you. Take care and know you are not alone. Respectfully, stormi property of Master Bear

theroebabe -> RE: Breaking Contracts (8/13/2004 9:10:30 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: SentForu Your and your Master/Dom have decided to make out a contract. In this contract, you both have stated you were to be monogamous. Say he did not live up to his end of the agreement. Would that give the slave the right to break the contract and leave? Or, would she still have to be released to remain honourable? I know they are not legally binding contracts. Yet, if you were to break one without being released, you would be looked down on. Do I understand correctly? Thanks, Myra Hi Myra well my take is this, the sub/slave should always act with honor. My last dominant while not officially collared to, i still felt as if i was collared. We did not have a contract but more of a verbal agreement and understanding. When i decided what we had was not what i wanted, it took a while for me to decide if i would still meet him naked and kneeling and all that to end it. I had packed his belongings so the day he came over i could not chicken out, and had his bags waiting for him when he was ready. I met him naked and kneeling according to our protocol. and when he asked me what was wrong we sat down and i asked for release. He granted it and we moved on from there. But the point is that i was honorable in how i dealt with the situation and that makes me feel better about it. there was no disrepect towards him. Roe

Leonidas -> RE: Breaking Contracts (8/13/2004 10:06:23 AM)
A breeched contract can be considered to be voided, unless there is a clause in the contract that spells out specific remedies in case of a breech. This is the way that it is with business contracts, I don't see why it wouldn't be the same with D/s contracts. You should make sure you have a "remedies" clause. Hmmm.... maybe he has to wear an 'I'm a Pitiful Little Sissy Bitch" T-shirt everywhere he goes except work for a week if you catch him fucking around. Sounds like a lot more fun than just breaking the contract, don't you think? Alternatively, you could always hit up Iwill for where to get the old iron jock strap from hell for a similar period. I think it's probably a good thing that I don't do contracts. On the other hand, if anyone out there has a twisted sense of humor and would like me to write theirs, let me know.

SentForu -> RE: Breaking Contracts (8/13/2004 12:38:27 PM)
stormi, Though, I am not in that situation, I really thank you for the offer of someone to talk to. That was very sweet of you. I'm sorry about your past experience, and am glad it worked out well for you. theroebabe, Yes, that sounds like wonderful advise. Thanks to you as well. Leonidas, If I need someone to write a contract, you'll be the first I contact.....[;)]

stormiKnightBEAR -> RE: Breaking Contracts (8/13/2004 1:31:33 PM)
Myra, [:)] Don't get this girl wrong... she wouldn't change anything. It was a lesson well learned. It taught stormi that above all you have to have HONOR. Walk with HONOR and pride and things will work out in the end. As for this girl, turns out it was the best thing. You see.... this girl is owned by one that she considers is the best life has to offer her, Master Bear. stormi wears His ko'lars, His Bear paw tattoo on her breast and the "family" heart as well as several pieces of jewelry every day. The depth of dedication to the contract for Master and this girl.........stormi asked Master to place the tattoo of a Bear paw on her. No matter what...... The paw and Master will always be with stormi. Be well, stormi property of Master Bear

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