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Profile critique, for a sorta weird reason - 1/17/2006 10:34:36 AM   
perverseangelic


Posts: 2625
Joined: 2/2/2004
From: Davis, Ca
Status: offline 		Normally I wouldn't ask somthing like this, but as since my last profile edit there has been a HUGE rise in people writing to me as if I were un-owned I'd -really- appreciate y'alls help.

Is my profile unclear? Does it make it sound as if I don't belong to someone? Do I sound like a single person searching for a primary owner? if so, how on earth can I change that?

I begin to think that the changes I've made have made my realtionship status and what we're looking for less clear, which wasn't my goal at all.

< bitching >I appologize for seeking out help, but I'm getting -really- tired of exchanging e-mails with people for a while, getting to like them, and then getting insulted, told me I'm no good, no use, or poorly trained because I didn't feel it necessary to keep name-dropping the fact that I belonged to someone, when he's reflected in everything I say -and- in my profile < end bitching >


And yes, I know it's very long.

_____________________________

~in the begining it is always dark~
Profile   Post #: 1
RE: Profile critique, for a sorta weird reason - 1/17/2006 11:05:38 AM   
LuckyAlbatross


Posts: 19224
Joined: 10/25/2005
Status: offline 		Can't read the profile yet dork :P

Anyway you should know it doesn't matter what you say, you will always have the clueless and miffed on your back.

_____________________________

Find stable partners, not a stable of partners.

"Sometimes my whore logic gets all fuzzy"- Californication

(in reply to perverseangelic)
Profile   Post #: 2
RE: Profile critique, for a sorta weird reason - 1/17/2006 11:12:29 AM   
perverseangelic


Posts: 2625
Joined: 2/2/2004
From: Davis, Ca
Status: offline 		Sorry, right after I posted this I added a "and I DON"T DO WEBCAMS" caveat.

And I know, but I feel like I'm lying to people if I misslead them. I figure it'll aleiviate my worry to know that I've been clear and then I can relegate the idiots to idiot-dom

_____________________________

~in the begining it is always dark~

(in reply to LuckyAlbatross)
Profile   Post #: 3
RE: Profile critique, for a sorta weird reason - 1/17/2006 12:41:19 PM   
BitaTruble


Posts: 9779
Joined: 1/12/2006
From: Texas
Status: offline
quote:

Is my profile unclear? Does it make it sound as if I don't belong to someone? Do I sound like a single person searching for a primary owner? if so, how on earth can I change that?


Seems pretty clear to me. The problem might be the 'sub-for-hire' thing in there. Someone reads that, figures they have a shot, so boom, they write to you with their own agenda figuring, hey, if she's for 'hire' maybe I can get her for free.

You make it VERY clear that you are owned, however, but some people don't care about that little detail.

Just remember... you can always use the block button!

Celeste

_____________________________

"Oh, so it's just like
Rock, paper, scissors."

He laughed. "You are the wisest woman I know."


(in reply to perverseangelic)
Profile   Post #: 4
RE: Profile critique, for a sorta weird reason - 1/17/2006 12:51:50 PM   
LuckyAlbatross


Posts: 19224
Joined: 10/25/2005
Status: offline 		You want my version of your profile?

No webcam use, long distance travel, use of honorifics, or chance of taking me away from my owner. Thanks.
If you are local, and interested in renting space to a part-time professional submissive, please don't hesitate to write me.

23 year old pansexual in a long term relationship with my owner. I am a masochist/pain slut and enjoy a variety of pain-sensations from clipping to cutting to flogging. My pain tolerance fluctuates, but is generally higher than average. I am a sensual hedonist. I love the pleasure of the flesh and love to give them to others. I can be something of an exhibitionist and have a fetish for collars.

I consider myself to be service oriented in the sense that a large part of both my desire for submission and my enjoyment of it comes through the simple act of serving.
Beyond these main points, I am whatever my Owner wishes me to be. Our relationship is still finding its balance but we are fully committed to eachother.

My owner and I are always open to like-minded individuals who are interested in both non-sexual/play relationships AND the possibility of joining us for play. We prefer other couples, but compatibility is priority.


_____________________________

Find stable partners, not a stable of partners.

"Sometimes my whore logic gets all fuzzy"- Californication

(in reply to perverseangelic)
Profile   Post #: 5
RE: Profile critique, for a sorta weird reason - 1/17/2006 1:59:47 PM   
MHOO314


Posts: 3628
Joined: 9/26/2004
Status: offline 		That's the nature, Mine is very clear about the new boy even the journal is very clear about the new boy and I state I don't do chat requests---yet I continue to get petitions telling Me they are for Me and I get chat requests constantly--and if you notice it gets worse when the moon is full--- hang in there

< Message edited by MHOO314 -- 1/17/2006 2:00:17 PM >

_____________________________

SLUTS: Southern Ladies Under Tremendous Stress...

Mistress Hathor


(in reply to perverseangelic)
Profile   Post #: 6
RE: Profile critique, for a sorta weird reason - 1/17/2006 2:23:41 PM   
Wildfleurs


Posts: 1650
Joined: 9/24/2004
From: Connecticut
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: perverseangelic

Normally I wouldn't ask somthing like this, but as since my last profile edit there has been a HUGE rise in people writing to me as if I were un-owned I'd -really- appreciate y'alls help.

Is my profile unclear? Does it make it sound as if I don't belong to someone? Do I sound like a single person searching for a primary owner? if so, how on earth can I change that?

I begin to think that the changes I've made have made my realtionship status and what we're looking for less clear, which wasn't my goal at all.

< bitching >I appologize for seeking out help, but I'm getting -really- tired of exchanging e-mails with people for a while, getting to like them, and then getting insulted, told me I'm no good, no use, or poorly trained because I didn't feel it necessary to keep name-dropping the fact that I belonged to someone, when he's reflected in everything I say -and- in my profile < end bitching >


And yes, I know it's very long.


Well what is confusing is that you are a pro-sub. I mean you are a pro but you aren't looking for clients? I suspect they think that means that you are available. Also you have checked off that you are actively seeking all of these categories:

* Dominant Women
* Dominant Men
* Submissive Women
* Submissive Men
* Switch Women
* Switch Men
* Dominant Trans
* Submissive Trans
* Dom/Dom Couples
* Sub/Sub Couples
* Femdom Couples
* Male-Dom Couples
* Friends Only
* Online Romance
* Roommates
* Joining a Poly Group

Chances are people that contact you think they fall into any of those groups, most notably "Online Romance." On top of that you clearly say that you and your owner are looking for individuals and/or couples for play.

I'm confused - why wouldn't people contact you?

C~

< Message edited by Wildfleurs -- 1/17/2006 2:24:00 PM >

_____________________________

"Just because you've always done it that way doesn't mean it's not incredibly stupid." -despair.com

~~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
The heart of it all - http://www.wildfleurs.com
~~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

(in reply to perverseangelic)
Profile   Post #: 7
RE: Profile critique, for a sorta weird reason - 1/17/2006 8:43:43 PM   
sub4hire


Posts: 6775
Joined: 1/1/2004
Status: offline
Could it be the photo? Most don't bother to read the profile, after all that would tell them you aren't seeking.
So, the ones responding to you aren't reading it.
Remove the photo and get less e-mails, simple really.

(in reply to perverseangelic)
Profile   Post #: 8
RE: Profile critique, for a sorta weird reason - 1/17/2006 9:23:04 PM   
perverseangelic


Posts: 2625
Joined: 2/2/2004
From: Davis, Ca
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Wildfleurs


Well what is confusing is that you are a pro-sub. I mean you are a pro but you aren't looking for clients? I suspect they think that means that you are available. Also you have checked off that you are actively seeking all of these categories:

Chances are people that contact you think they fall into any of those groups, most notably "Online Romance." On top of that you clearly say that you and your owner are looking for individuals and/or couples for play.

I'm confused - why wouldn't people contact you?

C~


Shoot. I didn't actually realize I'd clicked off "online romance." I shall fix that. Thank you for pointing it out.

I'm actually working on -becoming- a prosub, but I need to find a place to do scenes. I should probably just take that bit out all-together, but I -am- looking and I'd rather not totally cut out all my options.

I =am= available. And I =love= being contacted. I just get sick of people ignoring the fact that I'm with my owner most firmly. It isn't the contact I object to. It's the assumption that I'm single and the accusations when I say I'm not.

quote:

Could it be the photo? Most don't bother to read the profile, after all that would tell them you aren't seeking.
So, the ones responding to you aren't reading it.
Remove the photo and get less e-mails, simple really.


But we -are- activly looking. And I -do- want to attract people. Again, it isn't getting mail, it's the question as to whether my profile makes it clear that I'm with someone, as my primary.

I guess what I was complaining about wasn't being contacted, or being approached for possible realtionships. We -are- looking. It's just that I'm approached as a me, not as a we. I wanted to make sure the "we" part is clearly indicated.


LA--
Thank you, I'm gonna go try to pare down and c&p some of your transalations. i appreciate. I am wordy by nature, and tend to prefer adding rather than refining. I appreciate the help.

< Message edited by perverseangelic -- 1/17/2006 9:34:25 PM >

_____________________________

~in the begining it is always dark~

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Profile   Post #: 9
RE: Profile critique, for a sorta weird reason - 1/17/2006 9:57:50 PM   
Petruchio


Posts: 1615
Joined: 2/6/2005
Status: offline 		Your profile is still off-line, so I don't get all the drama, but why not hide your profile, then nobody has to waste their time?

Or would that ruin what you're trying to accomplish?


< Message edited by Petruchio -- 1/17/2006 10:00:51 PM >

(in reply to perverseangelic)
Profile   Post #: 10
RE: Profile critique, for a sorta weird reason - 1/17/2006 10:48:36 PM   
perverseangelic


Posts: 2625
Joined: 2/2/2004
From: Davis, Ca
Status: offline 		Because we are looking.


It's just that we are looking for play partners as a couple, and we have a couples listing as well. I just prefer to keep my own profile as I have an active presence on the forums here and make friends on my own as well. As I've said, it isn't that I mind being contacted! Not at all.

I just wanted to check with others to make sure that my profile was clear about the fact that we -are- a couple, and that I'm not on my own. I figure that people will probably continue to write to me as if I were single, as I'm frankly insecure sometimes, I needed feedback to make sure that I was clear, upfront, about the fact that I belong to someone. I wanted to make sure that this is clearly indicated, so I don't have to feel as though I'm leading people on.

I know how to politely deal with inapropriate e-mails, but I wanted to make sure that I hadn't included something in my profile to make them seem to be warented.

(the profile's offline 'cause I used some of LA's sugestions to hopefully improve again.)

_____________________________

~in the begining it is always dark~

(in reply to Petruchio)
Profile   Post #: 11
RE: Profile critique, for a sorta weird reason - 1/18/2006 7:59:40 AM   
Arpig


Posts: 9930
Joined: 1/3/2006
From: Increasingly further from reality
Status: offline 		I think your profile is quite clear as to you being owned. I also think it doesn't make one whit of difference. My sub'd profile clearly says she is owned, and states that while people are free to email her, if they want to chat they should go through me first....and she still gets requests to chat, etc.
There are simply some folks who either don't read the whole profile, or who don't care what is in it.

_____________________________

Big man! Pig Man!
Ha Ha...Charade you are!

Why do they leave out the letter b on "Garage Sale" signs?

CM's #1 All-Time Also-Ran


(in reply to perverseangelic)
Profile   Post #: 12
RE: Profile critique, for a sorta weird reason - 1/18/2006 9:09:56 AM   
Mercnbeth


Posts: 11766
Status: offline
quote:

I just prefer to keep my own profile as I have an active presence on the forums here and make friends on my own as well.


just an observation, since you asked....your profile identifies you as a slave, not a couple, so it might be that when folks are searching for a "slave" and not a "couple", your profile pops up on their list. then there will be those that won't even bother to look past your attractive photo and read what you write about being very very owned. perhaps there is a way to change where it says "Description" from "female slave" to something that would be searched as "couple".

edited to add: maybe you could come up with a seperate profile for your pro-sub endeavors?

< Message edited by Mercnbeth -- 1/18/2006 9:11:10 AM >

(in reply to perverseangelic)
Profile   Post #: 13
RE: Profile critique, for a sorta weird reason - 1/18/2006 10:48:59 AM   
perverseangelic


Posts: 2625
Joined: 2/2/2004
From: Davis, Ca
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Mercnbeth

quote:

I just prefer to keep my own profile as I have an active presence on the forums here and make friends on my own as well.


just an observation, since you asked....your profile identifies you as a slave, not a couple, so it might be that when folks are searching for a "slave" and not a "couple", your profile pops up on their list. then there will be those that won't even bother to look past your attractive photo and read what you write about being very very owned. perhaps there is a way to change where it says "Description" from "female slave" to something that would be searched as "couple".

edited to add: maybe you could come up with a seperate profile for your pro-sub endeavors?


I just like having my own profile y'know? Truthfully, having a female profile in addition to the couple profile expands the individuals that our add reaches. Our couple profile has been contacted twice, in all the time it's been up here, and both were indidivuals writing to 'buy' me from my owner. My individual profile has received a lot more attention both on target and off and has acutally been useful in finding play partners.

I find this is the case on most dating sites. We generally keep up two profiles, and by -far- meet more potential partners through the individual profile than the couple one.

I thought about creating a seperate profile, but I already get enough hassle for having a couple profile and an individual profile. I think that another profile with my pictures on it will up the amount of "ur a poseur" mail I get.

Thank you very much for the input, though. I appreciate it.


_____________________________

~in the begining it is always dark~

(in reply to Mercnbeth)
Profile   Post #: 14
RE: Profile critique, for a sorta weird reason - 1/18/2006 12:19:24 PM   
fergus


Posts: 1110
Joined: 6/22/2005
Status: offline 		Honestly,

I think it might be helpfull if one (possibly even the first or second photo) of the pictures included your Master.

Problem is that you are a hottie. There are many desperate people. Tehy see you photos first, brain shuts off. Type Type Type go the fingers.

Many will think "well, I'll write to her anyway, maybe there is a chance"

I say put up a picture of your Master, and I would seriously consider making the first or second one of the two of you.

fergus

(in reply to perverseangelic)
Profile   Post #: 15
RE: Profile critique, for a sorta weird reason - 1/18/2006 5:35:58 PM   
MysticalPhoenix


Posts: 212
Joined: 11/30/2005
From: Kelloggsville, Vanilla County MI
Status: offline 		I agree with fergus.

It does not matter what you put in your profile. Mine clearly states that I'm not looking, but people still write to me and offer various things.

I have a feeling that if your profile just said:

alkjhidoahigone029 nigi3 ngv ieo28ht4 agj9 hjfhea! Asdhiogf owihd ha goipewh...haigaga ogihewe as gejaioew gowoihg 329w0a !!!

People would still write to you, because they'd read that as: I am looking for you! Write to me, big boy...and all of your wildest fantasies will come true!!!

Bottom line: Nobody reads profiles, they just look at the pictures and start typing their email to you.

_____________________________

---------------------------------------------------------
Every one sees what you appear to be, few really know what you are.

(in reply to fergus)
Profile   Post #: 16
RE: Profile critique, for a sorta weird reason - 1/19/2006 1:00:57 AM   
Petruchio


Posts: 1615
Joined: 2/6/2005
Status: offline
quote:

alkjhidoahigone029 nigi3 ngv ieo28ht4 agj9 hjfhea! Asdhiogf owihd ha goipewh...haigaga ogihewe as gejaioew gowoihg 329w0a !!!


MystPhoenix, the correct spelling in the dative case is goipewhi, not goipewh.


(in reply to MysticalPhoenix)
Profile   Post #: 17
RE: Profile critique, for a sorta weird reason - 1/19/2006 4:20:08 AM   
orfunboi


Posts: 1223
Joined: 10/22/2005
Status: offline 		i think your profile is very clear about you being owned. But you have to understand, there are a lot of people out there that can't read. At least that has been my experience. Just ignore them and concentrate on the ones who have read your profile and seem like they are worth responding too.

(in reply to perverseangelic)
Profile   Post #: 18
RE: Profile critique, for a sorta weird reason - 1/19/2006 10:09:47 AM   
perverseangelic


Posts: 2625
Joined: 2/2/2004
From: Davis, Ca
Status: offline 		Thanks, all, again, for the advice and feedback.

Mostly I asked this to reasure myself.

I know that no matter what is in my profile, I will get responses that are totally off the wall. While it'd be nice to have that stop I know that by virtue of being female and having a picture up I'll get them.

I just needed to reassure myself that I wasnt' somehow leading people on. Because I'm insecure in most ways, I needed to have someone else tell me "no, you're very clear about who you are." Not so I can -stop- the mail I get, but so I can know that individuals who write me angry about the fact that I'm looking haven't read my profile.

I just needed to know that I clearly expressed who I am. I don't think I'll be able to -chagne- the responses I get, as long as I'ma ctivly looking, but I needed to reassure myself that there wasnt' something in my profile -prompting- those responses.

_____________________________

~in the begining it is always dark~

(in reply to orfunboi)
Profile   Post #: 19
RE: Profile critique, for a sorta weird reason - 1/19/2006 1:55:52 PM   
tsk1964


Posts: 20
Joined: 6/21/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: MysticalPhoenix

I agree with fergus.

It does not matter what you put in your profile. Mine clearly states that I'm not looking, but people still write to me and offer various things.

I have a feeling that if your profile just said:

alkjhidoahigone029 nigi3 ngv ieo28ht4 agj9 hjfhea! Asdhiogf owihd ha goipewh...haigaga ogihewe as gejaioew gowoihg 329w0a !!!

People would still write to you, because they'd read that as: I am looking for you! Write to me, big boy...and all of your wildest fantasies will come true!!!

Bottom line: Nobody reads profiles, they just look at the pictures and start typing their email to you.


That is another one of the hurdles that the sincere subs have to contend with. I would assume more so for sub males than sub females. The fact that so many people choose to ignore the text of a profile results in clogged email boxes. Which makes it even more important for a sub to make their reply stand out.

Of course if your profile states that you are not seeking then every reply you receive would be counter to what you stated. Which makes for an easy determination about which ones to delete.

(in reply to MysticalPhoenix)
Profile   Post #: 20
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