Coping Mechanism

Coping Mechanism (Full Version)

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allthatjaz -> Coping Mechanism (2/19/2009 2:31:22 AM)
I was wondering if other people have these. I have to say that I never gave this much thought and I certainly didn't set one in place deliberately but it just happened. I am talking about an intense session that is probably going to involve a lot of pain. A few weeks ago when this was happening to me I suddenly saw these brightly coloured capital letters. I concentrated on these letters which were very cosmic in colour and started to unravel them to make words. It sounds kind of crazy and thats fine because I am a bit of a nut, but what it did was enable me to take whatever was being dealt out to me. I know some people will say its a shame that I'm not concentrating on the pain S is dishing out and in some ways I feel that too. The only way I can explain it though is, its like being dragged away from my own body, without choice to a place where I have to concentrate on other things. I have spaced many times but this feels different. Perhaps it is a form of sub space but its something very new to me. Does anyone else have a very specific coping mechanism?

allthatjaz -> mistaken post (2/19/2009 2:59:07 AM)
oops

catize -> RE: Coping Mechanism (2/19/2009 3:57:26 AM)
We all develop coping mechanisms for dealing with stress; some times deliberately, some times subconsciously. Sounds like your subconscious found a pretty effective way to get you through an intense time. Now I’d suggest you come up with a strategy to rid yourself of that rather unnecessary guilt.

allthatjaz -> RE: Coping Mechanism (2/19/2009 4:18:29 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: catize We all develop coping mechanisms for dealing with stress; some times deliberately, some times subconsciously. Sounds like your subconscious found a pretty effective way to get you through an intense time. Now I’d suggest you come up with a strategy to rid yourself of that rather unnecessary guilt. Thanks cat... I wouldn't say I feel guilty so much as I miss the connection. When I sub space I become very connected with Steve and that makes it a very emotional session for us both but this takes me away from him and so the resulting memory of the session is not something deep and meaningful but more about how I can make the letters DARBDSTA into a word

catize -> RE: Coping Mechanism (2/19/2009 5:51:21 AM)
quote: I miss the connection. When I sub space I become very connected with Steve and that makes it a very emotional session for us both but this takes me away from him and so the resulting memory of the session is not something deep and meaningful You’ll have that. There will always be times the ‘connection’ is weaker or stronger. I find when we are not as tuned into each other, it is rather fun to reconnect after. We talk and describe what was happening and share it that way.

marie2 -> RE: Coping Mechanism (2/19/2009 6:28:04 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: allthatjaz quote: ORIGINAL: catize We all develop coping mechanisms for dealing with stress; some times deliberately, some times subconsciously. Sounds like your subconscious found a pretty effective way to get you through an intense time. Now I’d suggest you come up with a strategy to rid yourself of that rather unnecessary guilt. Thanks cat... I wouldn't say I feel guilty so much as I miss the connection. When I sub space I become very connected with Steve and that makes it a very emotional session for us both but this takes me away from him and so the resulting memory of the session is not something deep and meaningful but more about how I can make the letters DARBDSTA into a word Bastard?? lmaoo

feydeplume -> RE: Coping Mechanism (2/19/2009 6:37:04 AM)
there is something that used to be called bottom space. Totally unlike subspace where you are all floaty and stuff, bottom space is very focused on your own mind and your own senses. It is a way of processing the experience with something like a mnemonic or body memory so that you the person has a new point of reference and new insight into the activity itself. to use a sex metaphor, sometimes you are in it just for your own orgasm and don't work hard for the other person's pleasure. It may not have been the experience that you intended to have but it is the one that you needed that time, to go all metaphysical on it.

SimplyMichael -> RE: Coping Mechanism (2/19/2009 7:16:07 AM)
Why feel shame? Sometimes a top causes pain to get someone all spaced out and sometimes we do so because we want to hurt them. If we can't control and tell where you are at, it sure as hell isn't your fault! If I don't want someone flying while I hurt them, they are grounded. Keep em cold, toss a bit of cold water on them, say wierd shit to break their mental state. To me, the place you went sounds cool as hell and I would be on cloud nine for having sent you there.

allthatjaz -> RE: Coping Mechanism (2/19/2009 8:26:32 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: feydeplume something like a mnemonic or body memory so that you the person has a new point of reference and new insight into the activity itself. Bingo! this is exactly what it is Simply Michael Thats interesting because during this session he was very much trying to ground me! He wouldn't allow me to space out and every time I started going there he brought me straight back. I always think of subspace as a journey that your Dominant comes along with you to mentor, that way he knows how far to take you and when to bring you back. I know this is a very North American Indian way of thinking and I like it that way because I don't want to do that journey on my own. This time he was refusing to come with me, not allowing me to take those initial steps because he wanted me to feel the pure pain that he was giving me, he wanted it raw and full on. I don't feel shame that I couldn't take that raw energy so much as intrigued that my brain subconsciously did this.

feydeplume -> RE: Coping Mechanism (2/19/2009 9:12:18 AM)
welcome back to happy land and knowing that your brain and your spirit took you on the trip that you were meant to go on. It's not just all about multiple orgasms and endorphin clouds.

allthatjaz -> RE: Coping Mechanism (2/19/2009 9:27:05 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: feydeplume It's not just all about multiple orgasms Yeah thats what he keeps saying but Im not convinced !!

feydeplume -> RE: Coping Mechanism (2/19/2009 9:36:36 AM)
that is why Goddess made them such deep sleepers. Get all they can give, the pop on your favorite porn (Rocco fan here) and your trusty toys, a BIG glass of water, and let him sleep in peace.

kristileigh -> RE: Coping Mechanism (2/19/2009 2:44:44 PM)
i just try to stay focused on whatever is in front of me. Rather it be a pillow , the wall, or even someone else or even a sound in the room. i also , every stroke, say "thank You Master" or even "more Master please". Everyone has their own coping mechanisms. slave kristi

MasterFireMaam -> RE: Coping Mechanism (2/19/2009 10:30:10 PM)
Altered states of reality or consciousness can be induced in many ways...some by outside chemicals and some by our own chemicals. So, don't worry about that part. Many people use breathing exercises to cope with pain. When you pierce, for example, its better to do it on the exhale. Master Fire

allthatjaz -> RE: Coping Mechanism (2/20/2009 1:11:30 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: MasterFireMaam Altered states of reality or consciousness can be induced in many ways...some by outside chemicals and some by our own chemicals. So, don't worry about that part. Many people use breathing exercises to cope with pain. When you pierce, for example, its better to do it on the exhale. Master Fire Thanks MasterFireMaam I find my breathing goes to pot when I am taking intense pain even though I trained in breathing techniques in yoga and for the sport that I participate in. I have even been known to hyperventilate which annoys me to hell !! I am a trained piercer and spent some time with Fakir Masafar who works very much on being able to push air down into the belly (on exhaling) during the point of pain and your right about this being a very good pain coping mechanism. Unfortunately even with that sort of training under my belt, I still go to pieces with Steve [&:]

feydeplume -> RE: Coping Mechanism (2/20/2009 6:17:35 AM)
Spending time with Fakir is good training in pain management all in it own right!

allthatjaz -> RE: Coping Mechanism (2/20/2009 6:41:49 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: feydeplume Spending time with Fakir is good training in pain management all in it own right! Smiles....Yeah that guy is my hero. I would love to spend more time with him over the pond. Your very lucky to have him.

feydeplume -> RE: Coping Mechanism (2/20/2009 6:46:17 AM)
He is by far the most paradoxical person I have ever met. So "normal" and yet so "odd". He made normal things seem strange and fey and really (at the time and place) weird shit seem like the most usual and mundane of activities. But his laugh sort of spooks me. you never really know WHY he thinks something is funny

allthatjaz -> RE: Coping Mechanism (2/20/2009 7:05:24 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: feydeplume He is by far the most paradoxical person I have ever met. So "normal" and yet so "odd". He made normal things seem strange and fey and really (at the time and place) weird shit seem like the most usual and mundane of activities. But his laugh sort of spooks me. you never really know WHY he thinks something is funny Well that's it fey... I love ya now [:D] Too much tripping on endorphins possibly! The guy is clearly very spiritual in his own way and I think he somewhat lives inside his own world, which I'm sure is a nice place. What I love about him is his need to share his knowledge and his eagerness to have people understand what and why he practices what he does. I certainly feel very honoured to of spent time with this man and his followers.

feydeplume -> RE: Coping Mechanism (2/20/2009 8:17:29 AM)
aww thanks. Who knew my mixed and hazy feelings about Fakir would ever garner me anything other than "who?" or "he did what? and you stayed to watch?" or "you just don't understand what a special man he is you small minded woman"

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