introductions

introductions (Full Version)

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aaronsub1978 -> introductions (2/19/2009 7:20:33 PM)
Hello to all, Mistress, Ma'am, Ladies, Queens, Subs and other people i have missed. i have tried to speak with many Mistresses and seem to get a negative reaction. patience this one has been, and would like to live the lifestlye. can someone help me with what im doing wrong. Also Australia, Wagga Wagga dosnt seem to have a large BDSM family or im looking in the wrong place. Need help please! im not a guy looking for a power trip or free sex. i have been a shy boy and always known that women are the supreme gender. [image]http://www.collarchat.com/micons/m21.gif[/image]

beeble -> RE: introductions (2/20/2009 6:01:23 AM)
quote: aaronsub1978 wrote: i have... always known that women are the supreme gender. A lot of unattached subs say things like this and I'm never sure if they believe it or not. There's a big thread about female supremacy going on at the moment so I don't want to get into an argument about that here. All I will say is that a large majority of dominant women believe that neither sex is superior. So, if you're just saying that because you think it's the right thing to say, I suggest you reconsider. If it is something you believe in, try to approach Dommes as human beings first, and dominant members of the supreme gender second. beeble.

CatdeMedici -> RE: introductions (2/20/2009 8:39:12 AM)
<hugs beeble> someone does get it.

chezzy71 -> RE: introductions (2/20/2009 12:28:32 PM)
Nothing wrong with the thoughts just the approach.If yopu are confused as to what is happening with your intros then your intros need work.Some Dominas may state they seek experience but i will tell you what 100% seek and that is honesty.Be honest with them and yourself and you just might surprise yourself.

LadyConstanze -> RE: introductions (2/20/2009 2:48:07 PM)
Possibly most Dommes are swamped with messages, they don't know how serious you are, most possibly see you are relatively new here and well, to put it mildly, new members can be a bit "over enthusiastic", also try to read the profiles and mention something about their profiles to show you have read them, I can tell you, there is nothing that turns me off more and quicker than a guy claiming he has read my "whole profile" and then asking for something that I stated as an absolute dislike...

AcademyForSlaves -> RE: introductions (2/20/2009 8:40:14 PM)
Here are some tips which you may find helpful. 1. Always first read any rules for applying on her website, blog, or profile. She might have certain rules, criteria, or requirements for applying to her. 2. When applying remember to state your experience, but do not list out your fetishes in a way which seems like a script of what you expect her to do for or to you. If you come across as selfish, demanding, or topping from the bottom then she will not be interested. She wants a real submissive. 3. If you hope to find a real Mistress, behave like a real slave. Do not be selfish, rude, or act like a client wanting only a session. 4. List out all the ways you feel you can serve her (not the ways you hope to serve her since that again comes across as a scripted list of your fetishes.) 5. Do not send crude sexual pictures of yourself. In fact, it is best not to send any pictures until she asks for one. She most likely already has enough pictures crowding her files. 6. Do not send a template email, or a bulk mailout email to several Mistresses at once. She will not consider you serious about wanting to be HER slave. 7. Be honest and sincere. 8. If you do not receive a reply from her after 3 days, do a polite follow up in case she did not receive your email. Hope this helps.

stella41b -> RE: introductions (2/21/2009 9:16:11 PM)
You can get yourself into an ego trip invent some incredibly submissive or slave persona and hope that MistressBitchfaceGoddessDeathRay (who is also on an ego trip) will like your ego trip from the 100's of ego trips that pass by her each day and you get it together... ...or you can simply be yourself, understand that behind every Goddess, Mistress, Lady and so forth is a woman, get to know her as a person and approach her as you would a new female friend and take it from there.

LadyHibiscus -> RE: introductions (2/21/2009 9:21:58 PM)
Stella you are such a REBEL!! [:D]

MaamJay -> RE: introductions (2/23/2009 12:55:11 AM)
Not sure about Wagga Wagga but it is true that it can be hard to find fellow bdsmers in smaller rural cities in Australia! That said, Master and I found some here in Bundy so there's hope! It's always good to check over your approaches and see if they can be improved. The Academy Assistant Mistress gave some excellent advice, and other threads here caution against the truly annoying one liner! "Hello Maam", "How are You today?" "Greetings from a boy who wants to be Your slave" are all ones I've received that don't work. The first one leaves Me nowhere to go other than to say Hello back. The second is only marginally better in that I get to say how I am but it doesn't extend the conversation. And the third might appear to be a good way to start ... except how can he want to be My slave when he doesn't know Me at all?? What makes him think I'd accept someone who was willing to bow to anyone? So, as the advice says, approach them as a Woman first, read their profile and comment on it specifically (or better yet, ask a question about something in the profile), be friendly, polite, write in full words, greet the person with their screen name (don't make assumptions about what they like to be called, We're all different!), and actually sign off the note. An example: Hello (Her screen name) I am from (general location - make sure it's appropriate to where She is from/states She wants) and I am looking to become involved in BDSM. From what I have read/experienced, I identify as a submissive male. I was reading through your profile and I saw that you really enjoy (x) activity. I am not very experienced but I am curious and willing to learn as much as possible so I'd really appreciate it if you would explain what (x) means to you. Thank you in anticipation of your time. Regards (your screen name) It's not rocket science, it's good manners! Maam Jay aka violet[A]

aaronsub1978 -> RE: introductions (2/23/2009 1:07:16 PM)
Dear Beeble, CatdeMedici, Chezzy71,LadyConstanze, AcademyForSlaves, Stella41b, LadyHibiscus and MaamJay, Thankyou and wish that i had known half of the information that you Ladies have included here. In my own experience it is expressed by many that they require money, although i was hesitant in outlaying money to someone i did not trust or even know. Thankyou for your help, in which i appreciate greatly. i shall change my approach greatly. With in this Lifestyle, should the sub be respected by the Domme? Once again thankyou for all your help. With respect aaronsub

beeble -> RE: introductions (2/23/2009 2:22:26 PM)
quote: aaronsub1978 wrote: Dear Beeble, CatdeMedici, Chezzy71,LadyConstanze, AcademyForSlaves, Stella41b, LadyHibiscus and MaamJay, Thankyou and wish that i had known half of the information that you Ladies have included here. The other half of the information that you need is that Chezzy and I are guys. [:D] But I don't mind and you're neither the first nor, I'm sure, the last to make that mistake. quote: In my own experience it is expressed by many that they require money, although i was hesitant in outlaying money to someone i did not trust or even know. Unless you're paying a reputable pro for a session, I wouldn't recommend parting with any cash. Why should you have to prove yourself to her when she doesn't have to prove herself to you. And what does paying money prove, anyway? quote: With in this Lifestyle, should the sub be respected by the Domme? As far as I'm concerned, you should respect people as much as you feel they deserve, regardless of whether they're submissive, dominant, both or neither. Whether or not somebody enjoys whipping or being whipped is a completely separate issue from whether they deserve your respect. beeble.

mummyman321 -> RE: introductions (2/23/2009 4:53:18 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: beeble Unless you're paying a reputable pro for a session, I wouldn't recommend parting with any cash. Why should you have to prove yourself to her when she doesn't have to prove herself to you. And what does paying money prove, anyway? beeble. Even though Bebble's question is rhetorical I feel the need to answer anyway. That have sucker written all over your face and enjoy throwing away your money with no hope of receiving anything in return

MsFlutter -> RE: introductions (2/23/2009 5:15:00 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: stella41b .....MistressBitchfaceGoddessDeathRay (who is also on an ego trip)... ROFL !! Yet another Stella classic !!

beeble -> RE: introductions (2/23/2009 5:26:31 PM)
quote: mummyman321 wrote: Even though Bebble's question is rhetorical I feel the need to answer anyway. That have sucker written all over your face and enjoy throwing away your money with no hope of receiving anything in return Yes, yes. But, apart from writing sucker all over our faces, throwing away our money and never giving us anything in return, what have the Romans ever done for us? beeble.

AlexandraLynch -> RE: introductions (2/23/2009 11:14:04 PM)
Well, for me, checking your spelling is part of it. A "bad" email to me: One line of "hello" "how are you" or "I want to obey you in all things", with misspellings, from someone outside my area of consideration, or with kinks I've said are not mine. A "good" email. "Good evening, I hope you are well. I have read your profile, and since we have compatible kinks and I meet your requirements as stated in the profile, I would like to open a conversation with you and see what might come of it. I may be reached at (email) or on (messenger identity). Thank you for your time, and I hope to hear from you."

MaamJay -> RE: introductions (2/24/2009 12:32:13 AM)
You're welcome aaron. As to money, I agree there is a vast difference between choosing to spend $$ on a real life session with a good pro-Domme and agreeing to send money (often phrased as tribute) to someone online you don't know! A good sub is a sensible sub! As to respect, I believe it is earned on both sides of the slash. I expect My sub to respect Me, and I expect to respect him. At the outset, both should treat the other respectfully and courteously until perhaps they act in a way that indicates they don't deserve it. In which scenario you could still choose the high moral ground and respectfully say "Thanks but no thanks" and leave! Maam Jay aka violet[A]

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