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Mercnbeth -> A Day At the Spa (2/27/2009 8:34:25 AM)
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The hell with politics and taxes; avoid getting emotional about either and you'll enjoy life a lot more.
I was trying to figure out a way to talk about what happened to me during our last trip to Vegas because it illustrated the hypocrisy and irony of living in what basically is still a 'puritanical' USA.
True story...
Dateline Vegas 'Sin City'; totally mis-named because unless you're paying to see them - female nipples are prohibited from display.
We went there for Valentine's weekend, stayed in a great suite at the Bellagio that in better economic times went for 5 times what we paid for it. Great view of the fountains from floor to ceiling windows, with accompanying music piped directly through the rooms sound system, the room had a bar, steam room and beth's requirement - jacuzzi tub. We had a great time, highlighted by seeing Billy Joel and the water-sport version of 'Cirque du Soleil' called 'O'.
Being the indulgent person I am, on the last day of the weekend I always allow beth to book us into a spa treatment and couples massage. she loves being rubbed, I love being with her and, using all my control, I can manage to lay still for an hour. The first problem is, we like a couples treatment; which means being in the room at the same time. Mirage doesn't have it. Bellagio is okay, but has a very mundane list of services and facility, the Canyon Ranch at the Venetian is the best, but being Valentine's weekend we waited too long to book it. So we decided to go back to 'Qua' at Caesars, nice facility, good variety of treatments, and a 'snow room'; which enters into the story later.
First thing you have to decide is what gender you want to rub you. Now the massage is not supposed to be sexual, but for some reason, people are particular. We're not, and it just so happened that this time, we both had a male masseur. I don't hate the experience, I just hate to passively lay there. I put up with it by amusing myself thinking about the stupidity of man. On this day, I though how stupid it was that after enjoying a very nice couples treatment, beth and I would have to go our separate ways to enjoy the various spa amenities such as the water pools, steam, sauna, and therapeutic inhaling rooms, and the snow room. Two segregated by gender-specific facilities, exactly the same.
beth's story is always the same. she's the minority, usually the one one frolicking around naked, wrapped at most in a towel. The mens' side - mostly naked, except for a couple of 'nerd' types who probably didn't take showers in High School either. Bodies were of the same range you'd see at any club, nobody cared; well, some did.
I was sitting in a semi-crowded, wet therapeutic inhaling room when a new guy came in looking for a place to sit. I moved over to make some room and motioned for him to come over. I thought it a bit weird that he used my knee to boost himself up, but it was no big deal. Turns out he was from Philly. We started to chat and had a lot of common history in our past, including knowing and going to the best pizza place in the USA - Delorenzo's in Trenton. The man, lets call him Frank, was a successful businessman and we enjoyed our conversation.
As we went from one treatment to the next Frank and I frolicked nude together. His 'accidental' knee touch became a more deliberate knee-slap for a joke, shoulder grab to accent a business point, chest slap in the manner of Seinfeld's 'Elaine' as a exclamation point to realizing we've been to many of the same places.
Now I knew what he wanted, but I was curious, and just a bit sadistic to allow him to proceed, to see how far he would go. I mean, after all, this wasn't a 1980's 'bathhouse' in the 'Village'; this was 'Qua' at Caesars. Finally it was 'snow-room' time. This is a place where you go to close your pores. It's below freezing and they pipe in snow - very 'Scandinavian'. It's the least crowded room. Frank and I went in, sat down and Frank went for it. It was time for me to stop being a 'tease' and letting him know that even if I was 'into that' I wouldn't be into it in the 'snow room' at 'Qua' where at any moment we'd have spectators.
Frank became instantly apologetic and very scared. I guess he thought I was going to kick his ass or, at minimum, get him kicked out. Quite the contrary, I assured him that I wasn't offended in the least, in fact a bit flattered. (I guess the steam diffuses people's vision.) But he wouldn't stop apologizing. He said he didn't usually get a polite 'no thanks' and, at best, got yelled at and called names. I told him that just showed the confidence level of those people. Frank couldn't make me gay, or make me want to let him touch me, or whatever. To me it was really a 'so what' situation. I wished him well, and ended up saying I was sorry if he thought I was leading him on. Afterward, he rushed to shower, dress, and leave; telling me goodbye and saying he was off to meet his wife (YUP) down at the casino.
Damn - gays have it great! Frank could have taken any same sex partner and had a hell of a time with him in the spa. I would have loved to have beth join me. Not to do/share anything more than Frank and I did, except we may have held hands. I don't think any of the guys, even Frank, would have been upset seeing her nipples anymore than mine. beth may not have anything swinging as predominately as some of the guys there, but again - it's a spa, not a Village bathhouse; its supposed to be therapeutic, not sexual.
What's the solution, three exactly the same facilities, his-hers-whatever? How about if we all just grow up and deal with the fact that gender and sexual preference are not necessarily associated exclusively with one another, and they are not obvious? Maybe a better sign on the doors would be 'repressed' - 'open-minded'. Not to necessarily do anything with everyone, just not caring and not worrying about doing anything other than enjoying the facility.
When I told beth the story she was jealous. In the nearly six years we've been doing this, she's never been hit on. HA!
Anyway, I thought it made for a good story.
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