|
BitaTruble -> Means to an end: Using BDSM (3/3/2009 7:26:01 PM)
|
So, the last two months have taken their toll, physically, mentally and emotionally on me. I was standing out on the terrace on Saturday just looking at the ocean and Michael came up behind me, moved my hair and started kissing my neck. I love that.. my neck.. that´s my spot, yanno? Anyway, he turned me around and just gave me the sweetest kiss and, while I didn´t exactly cry, everything just sort of got to me. All that radical change, the being alone for so many hours a day, or for days at a time and being away from friends, family, country etc., and he asked me what was wrong and for the life of me, I just couldn´t answer. It wasn´t that I didn´t know, I just couldn´t answer. I couldn´t speak.
This man, he put his hands in my hair, gentle, his touch was so gentle and he led me to the bedroom and turned me to face him and just started to take off my clothes. I was mute the whole time and once I was naked, he laid me across the bed and started to spank me .. not at all hard or anything .. it was still very gentle. He took his time and slowly picked up the pace and started to hit me harder and harder until he was just wailing on me. It´s like he knew exactly what I needed. There was nothing but a spanking, so benign, so ordinary, not at all edgy but in time he got me to the point where he was just pounding on me and that dam burst. I didn´t even hurt that much either.. rather weird for me to get to that sort of place without massive pain, but thinking back, the emotional pain, the mental pain.. together with that last bit of physical pain.. well, I broke and I sobbed. It didn´t even last all that long.. the crying I mean .. probably less than a minute but in that minute, the last two months were released, lifted, let go and they just sort of faded away. Then he cuddled me .. even that wasn´t for very long and it didn´t need to be, it was all exactly right, done in exactly the right way at the exact time I needed it.. all of it without a word spoken between us.
Yanno, sometimes when we play, BDSM is the means to the end with the end being sex but not every time, certainly not that time. I think that´s one of the things I love best about this whole BDSM thing. It really does get to be about whatever people want it to be .. and sometimes it´s not about doing what the dominant wants to do, but about doing what needs to be done so that the rest of the lifestuff can stay on an even keel. Neither one of us would have put that need into words because until it actually happened, I wouldn´t have thought about it in those terms, but in hindsight, yeah, I needed it and I appreciate him seeing that need and doing what needed to be done before all that crap took me to a place I would rather not have gone and to tell the truth, I was pretty much on the edge there for a while. I go through my process, but there is only so much that internal ass kicking can do for a girl, yanno?
There are many ways to use BDSM and Michael and I do indulge in a number of them and as long as we use BDSM on our terms, to our advantage, it´s all good.
Oh, one last thing.. I´ve always enjoyed hand spankings but usually as a beginning to something edgier but Saturday has converted me. Sometimes a spanking really is exactly what´s called for and all the fancy toys, do-dads, gadgets, batteries and voltage can sit in the corner collecting dust and aren´t missed at all.
I don´t have any questions or anything, was just sharing one of the ways that BDSM was used on that day for a particular purpose and how much it was appreciated for just what it was .. a means to an end which left me feeling better than before it started and gave Himself back a happier, lighter slave for the effort.
Thank you, Sir.
|
|
|
|
