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"Under Consideration" ??? - 1/22/2006 10:22:04 AM

la90066

Posts: 177
Joined: 1/1/2004
Status: offline

Question for both the Tops and bottoms...

When a sub/slave is "under consideration" and specifies this in their profile (either on their own or by order of a Dom/me)...

Dom/mes -- Do you mention anything in YOUR profile that you are "considering" said sub/slave for service/ownership, or do you wait till you've "accepted" this person before mentioning it in your profile -- for that matter, would you mention it even if the sub/slave is accepted?

subs/slaves -- Do you want/need any mention of your "consideration" in the Dom/me's profile that you are being "considered" by, or would you not want/need this mention until you've been "accepted" -- for that matter, do you want/need it mentioned at all, even if you are accepted?

Your thoughts?!!

Post #: 1

RE: "Under Consideration" ??? - 1/22/2006 10:30:51 AM

justatoy2

Posts: 163
Joined: 6/20/2005
Status: offline

personally i think all the consideration is nonsense. What does it mean? is it like going steady? To me its just all o/l nonesense and has no place in my life. So no i wouldn't want it...but hey thats me.

(in reply to la90066)

Post #: 2

RE: "Under Consideration" ??? - 1/22/2006 10:43:02 AM

Misstoyou

Posts: 1149
Joined: 9/4/2004
Status: offline

When I started evaluating my real-time submissive in March of last year, I put that fact in my profile. From a Domme's point of view, it does cut down on trolling. :) My submissive left his CM profile up, unchanged, but stopped accessing the website.

When I collared him in September, I changed my profile from saying "evaluating" to "selected". (And got a lot of "It's about time!" messages. lol) He came back on site, just once, to add to his profile that he is currently owned by me. I didn't require him to, but it made me smile to read it, and continues to. Every time I sign in for the boards, I keep a window with his profile up.

All together now, "Awww!"

_____________________________

~ Miss Marie

a.k.a. "mean Lady"

(in reply to la90066)

Post #: 3

RE: "Under Consideration" ??? - 1/22/2006 10:43:46 AM

ExistentialSteel

Posts: 676
Joined: 1/18/2005
Status: offline

Being under consideration means a Dom has been fucking around with you for awhile, but is about to cut you loose.

_____________________________

For those who are like Roman Candles leaving bright trails in the night sky while the crowd watches until the dark blue center light bursts into magnificent colors and the crowd goes, ahhhhhhhhhh.

(in reply to justatoy2)

Post #: 4

RE: "Under Consideration" ??? - 1/22/2006 10:44:41 AM

la90066

Posts: 177
Joined: 1/1/2004
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: justatoy2

personally i think all the consideration is nonsense. What does it mean? is it like going steady? To me its just all o/l nonesense and has no place in my life. So no i wouldn't want it...but hey thats me.

I don't personally have a problem with it... As a Dom, when I see that in a bottom's profile, I think it's a courtesy to both the bottom's Dom/me and other Dom/mes.

I tend not to approach bottoms that have this in their profile out of respect for the Dom that's considering her, if that makes sense?

(in reply to justatoy2)

Post #: 5

RE: "Under Consideration" ??? - 1/22/2006 10:45:33 AM

KatyLied

Posts: 13029
Joined: 2/24/2005
From: Pennsylvania
Status: offline

It's one more label to affix to people. It may have a purpose, I'm not into all of that protocol, so I don't get it.

_____________________________

“If you want to live a happy life, tie it to a goal, not to people or things.”
- Albert Einstein

(in reply to ExistentialSteel)

Post #: 6

RE: "Under Consideration" ??? - 1/22/2006 11:00:19 AM

caitlyn

Posts: 3473
Joined: 12/22/2004
Status: offline

I'm under conservation.

If not taken care of, and/or used up ... I won't be around for long.

(in reply to KatyLied)

Post #: 7

RE: "Under Consideration" ??? - 1/22/2006 11:02:09 AM

truesub4u

Posts: 2949
Joined: 11/17/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: KatyLied

It's one more label to affix to people. It may have a purpose, I'm not into all of that protocol, so I don't get it.

I don't consider it as protocol. I've in the past put in profile, under consideration. when I've felt something really special with the one i'm with. And I like to know they liked seeing that i am serious enough with them to try to put forth effort of screaming it out.

Now a days, and before Master, I left it alone. I only put it my profile last week about Master. and I didn't specify who, or even actually owned. Just that things are going great now.

Some believe this leaves me open to explore another. I on the other hand do not.

What I do like about is what LA said, when another sees it, it does let other Doms know, there's a realtionship in the works here. Out of repect for the Dom in the relationship, staying clear is best... for now.

Call it a courtship, going steady. It doesn't matter. Would you prefer to see it in a profile and keep going.... or get the e-mail back stating.. "Sorry, I'm with someone right now.. good luck in your continued search?"

(in reply to KatyLied)

Post #: 8

RE: "Under Consideration" ??? - 1/22/2006 11:08:22 AM

JohnWarren

Posts: 3807
Joined: 3/18/2005
From: Delray Beach, FL
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: la90066

quote:

ORIGINAL: justatoy2

personally i think all the consideration is nonsense. What does it mean? is it like going steady? To me its just all o/l nonesense and has no place in my life. So no i wouldn't want it...but hey thats me.

I don't personally have a problem with it... As a Dom, when I see that in a bottom's profile, I think it's a courtesy to both the bottom's Dom/me and other Dom/mes.

I tend not to approach bottoms that have this in their profile out of respect for the Dom that's considering her, if that makes sense?

That's how I see it too. When I come across a profile for someone who is near an organization I know a bit about (what's what most of my email is), I send a short message because I think that getting to meet people in a face to face environment is a good thing. However, if the person has the "under consideration" flag out, I usually won't send anything.

_____________________________

www.lovingdominant.org

(in reply to la90066)

Post #: 9

RE: "Under Consideration" ??? - 1/22/2006 11:24:31 AM

Wildfleurs

Posts: 1650
Joined: 9/24/2004
From: Connecticut
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: la90066

Question for both the Tops and bottoms...

When a sub/slave is "under consideration" and specifies this in their profile (either on their own or by order of a Dom/me)...

Dom/mes -- Do you mention anything in YOUR profile that you are "considering" said sub/slave for service/ownership, or do you wait till you've "accepted" this person before mentioning it in your profile -- for that matter, would you mention it even if the sub/slave is accepted?

subs/slaves -- Do you want/need any mention of your "consideration" in the Dom/me's profile that you are being "considered" by, or would you not want/need this mention until you've been "accepted" -- for that matter, do you want/need it mentioned at all, even if you are accepted?

Your thoughts?!!

There's already a term for under consideration - its called dating!

I mean thats all it is. Dating with the need to get fancy and formal without any actual groundwork or committment.

C~

_____________________________

"Just because you've always done it that way doesn't mean it's not incredibly stupid." -despair.com

~~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
The heart of it all - http://www.wildfleurs.com
~~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

(in reply to la90066)

Post #: 10

RE: "Under Consideration" ??? - 1/22/2006 11:24:39 AM

IronBear

Posts: 9008
Joined: 6/19/2005
From: Beenleigh, Qld, Australia
Status: offline

I've posted extensively how the collar system works in my home, however, when I'm considering someone, they will be in the first stage of a House Collar which is the probationarry Stage which will last for a minimum of 30 days and may last as long as is necessary and utill we both have seen what the other is about and if we suit each other (this includes the whole house inc the Malamute).

_____________________________

Iron Bear

Master of Bruin Cottage

http://www.bruincottage.org

Your attitude, words & actions are yours. Take responsibility for them and the consequences they incur.

D.I.L.L.I.G.A.F.

(in reply to JohnWarren)

Post #: 11

RE: "Under Consideration" ??? - 1/22/2006 12:49:02 PM

OsideGirl

Posts: 14441
Joined: 7/1/2005
From: United States
Status: offline

I've always thought it funny when a female sub has "under consideration" on their profile.

Mainly, because male Doms outnumber female subs 3 to 1 in the scene. With a lot of male Doms to choose from it's actually the Dom that is under consideration.

_____________________________

Give a girl the right shoes and she will conquer the world. ~ Marilyn Monroe

The Accelerated Velocity of Terminological Inexactitude

(in reply to IronBear)

Post #: 12

RE: "Under Consideration" ??? - 1/22/2006 12:58:45 PM

la90066

Posts: 177
Joined: 1/1/2004
Status: offline

As a side note, what I find interesting in this thread regarding the whole "under consideration" protocol thingy, is some appear to have a rather silly view of it.

So it makes me think, ya know... Others probably think wearing a collar, referring to another as "Sir" or "Slut" or getting spanked as punishment is just as silly -- if not more?!!

I'm always tickled by the hypocrisy of some kink folks. BTW... I don't say that to offend anyone, just that I find it interesting that those who feel our lifestyle shouldn't be "judged", often do the very same?

As for me personally? I very much like it when a bottom I'm getting serious about puts "Under Consideration" in her profile. It lets others know this person is actively persuing something with another. However, I would personally only change my profile once she was "accepted".

And for those who plan on jumping all over me for this, her being "under consideration" would only last for a week or two (not months or years), as I think we'd both know at that point if we were going to move forward or not. It ain't, after all, brain surgery... You either want to be with her or you don't.

For me, "under consideration" is a nice gesture after two people have met online, like each other, and are planning on meeting real-time -- kind of a "pre-meeting" thing. After the meeting, it should be clear whether the two wish to persue each other.

I also see it as a "mental" thing, for the sub/slave -- to allow her to feel more "submissive" as she's given the control of her acceptance to her Dom.

Again, I know it's a goofy (though fun) protocol, but it's no more goofy (or fun) than the other stuff our fellow kinksters do, ya know?

<--- I'm in my "Happy Place"... Anyone wanna come along? hee hee hee

(in reply to IronBear)

Post #: 13

RE: "Under Consideration" ??? - 1/22/2006 1:02:50 PM

la90066

Posts: 177
Joined: 1/1/2004
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: OsideGirl

I've always thought it funny when a female sub has "under consideration" on their profile.

Mainly, because male Doms outnumber female subs 3 to 1 in the scene. With a lot of male Doms to choose from it's actually the Dom that is under consideration.

Respectfully, I'd say yes and no... While I agree there are more men on kink sites, I'd argue that the vast majority are not "Doms". I personally know 3 subs that left CollarMe in under a month because of the hundreds of emails they received, they could not find ONE that they considered a "Dom", instead of a snot-nosed "Dickhead" who just wanted to get laid.

Do ya kinda know what I mean?

(in reply to OsideGirl)

Post #: 14

RE: "Under Consideration" ??? - 1/22/2006 1:14:15 PM

ehlovindom

Posts: 248
Joined: 1/23/2004
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: caitlyn

I'm under conservation.

If not taken care of, and/or used up ... I won't be around for long.

Conservation or Observation caitlyn? I've been observing many of your posts and have to think many others have as well. And no one has made a serious offer to take care of you yet? I am surprised at the lack of attention, might you offer an explanation?

_____________________________

Know which bridge to build, which one to cross, and which one to burn!

(in reply to caitlyn)

Post #: 15

RE: "Under Consideration" ??? - 1/22/2006 1:22:44 PM

ehlovindom

Posts: 248
Joined: 1/23/2004
Status: offline

I tend not to concern myself with why someone might have put the words "under consideration" on their profile. Whether one believes the words have any meaning or they are there just to cut down on message traffic, I won't bother to contact that person out of respect, in other words, refraining from interfering with them.

_____________________________

Know which bridge to build, which one to cross, and which one to burn!

(in reply to ehlovindom)

Post #: 16

RE: "Under Consideration" ??? - 1/22/2006 1:24:51 PM

ehlovindom

Posts: 248
Joined: 1/23/2004
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: OsideGirl

Mainly, because male Doms outnumber female subs 3 to 1 in the scene. With a lot of male Doms to choose from it's actually the Dom that is under consideration.

Wasn't it always that way?

_____________________________

Know which bridge to build, which one to cross, and which one to burn!

(in reply to OsideGirl)

Post #: 17

RE: "Under Consideration" ??? - 1/22/2006 2:18:40 PM

IronBear

Posts: 9008
Joined: 6/19/2005
From: Beenleigh, Qld, Australia
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: la90066

quote:

ORIGINAL: OsideGirl

I've always thought it funny when a female sub has "under consideration" on their profile.

Mainly, because male Doms outnumber female subs 3 to 1 in the scene. With a lot of male Doms to choose from it's actually the Dom that is under consideration.

Respectfully, I'd say yes and no... While I agree there are more men on kink sites, I'd argue that the vast majority are not "Doms". I personally know 3 subs that left CollarMe in under a month because of the hundreds of emails they received, they could not find ONE that they considered a "Dom", instead of a snot-nosed "Dickhead" who just wanted to get laid.

Do ya kinda know what I mean?

I'd have to disagree with the comment about not finding a real Dom. Unless their profil;es were so badly written aqnd misleading so as to attract those who only want to get laid, it's more probable thet they just didn't attract what they were looking for. It takes time and effort to get the right person to respond.

quote:

ORIGINAL: ehlovindom

quote:

ORIGINAL: caitlyn

I'm under conservation.

If not taken care of, and/or used up ... I won't be around for long.

Conservation or Observation caitlyn? I've been observing many of your posts and have to think many others have as well. And no one has made a serious offer to take care of you yet? I am surprised at the lack of attention, might you offer an explanation?

Unless caitlyn has reworked her profile, I seem to remember that she had made a comment that at the moment she is collared to her collage. I'd guess that is probable the biggest and toughest Dom in her area wouldn't you?

quote:

ORIGINAL: ehlovindom

I tend not to concern myself with why someone might have put the words "under consideration" on their profile. Whether one believes the words have any meaning or they are there just to cut down on message traffic, I won't bother to contact that person out of respect, in other words, refraining from interfering with them.

I'd agree there, unless she had an extrordinary profile and then I may message her to complement her on the profile and if so I'd leave a salutory comment to her Dominant.

_____________________________

Iron Bear

Master of Bruin Cottage

http://www.bruincottage.org

Your attitude, words & actions are yours. Take responsibility for them and the consequences they incur.

D.I.L.L.I.G.A.F.

(in reply to la90066)

Post #: 18

RE: "Under Consideration" ??? - 1/22/2006 2:24:42 PM

Chaingang

Posts: 1727
Joined: 10/24/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: OsideGirl
Mainly, because male Doms outnumber female subs 3 to 1 in the scene. With a lot of male Doms to choose from it's actually the Dom that is under consideration.

This assertion doesn't jibe with what I think is true. In fact, I think it's the exact opposite. Others have occasionally noted information in agreement with my own anecdotal observations, as here:

http://www.collarchat.com/m_234564/mpage_1/key_/tm.htm#234646

_____________________________

"Everything flows, nothing stands still." (Πάντα ῥεῖ καὶ οὐδὲν μένει) - Heraclitus

(in reply to OsideGirl)

Post #: 19

RE: "Under Consideration" ??? - 1/22/2006 2:35:09 PM

ExistentialSteel

Posts: 676
Joined: 1/18/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Chaingang

quote:

ORIGINAL: OsideGirl
Mainly, because male Doms outnumber female subs 3 to 1 in the scene. With a lot of male Doms to choose from it's actually the Dom that is under consideration.

This assertion doesn't jibe with what I think is true. In fact, I think it's the exact opposite. Others have occasionally noted information in agreement with my own anecdotal observations, as here:

http://www.collarchat.com/m_234564/mpage_1/key_/tm.htm#234646

Chaingain, I almost said something about that too. I agree with you. The ratio of subs to Doms always creates disagreements, but I do think male Doms over 40 generally have it made. Of course this could be because female subs over 40, plus subs of all ages, tend to want older Doms. Realistically, in social vanilla situations, guys over 40 are in demand wouldn't everyone agree? Anyway, I don't want to debate this thing again, but I had to nod at you on this.

_____________________________

For those who are like Roman Candles leaving bright trails in the night sky while the crowd watches until the dark blue center light bursts into magnificent colors and the crowd goes, ahhhhhhhhhh.

(in reply to Chaingang)

Post #: 20

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