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Nerdmaster -> Daddy (3/11/2009 12:18:23 AM)

I was in a non-vanilla relationship, now over, D/s mostly just in the bedroom. It wasn't a master/slave thing or anything like that. She just liked being dominated and I liked dominating her. Something happened once that I still think of after all these years. She asked me about being her Daddy. I didn't understand what she meant but I wanted to, so I asked her to tell me about it, but she wouldn't, and I could never get her to talk about it again. I guess she felt that if it wasn't something I was already into that it wouldn't be real or something.

So I see in a lot of profiles here that it's not an uncommon need. But what is that need? If you're looking for a Daddy what does that mean to you? Do you find doms that want to fill that role or is it more common that you find doms that are willing to grow into that role but otherwise wouldn't have that inclination?




Rainfire -> RE: Daddy (3/11/2009 3:51:14 AM)

Welcome to CM and the boards, Nerdmaster. I had misconceptions about the Daddy Dom (or Mommy Domme for that matter) for years. I wasn't looking for one, I thought it centered around strictly ageplay. However, I found the following information helped a lot for me to understand better about Daddy Doms.

Daddy Doms

There are a lot of threads already on Daddy Doms, here is a basic list I once made of past threads on them and I'm sure you can find more if you use the search function using "Daddy Doms":

http://www.collarchat.com/fb.asp?m=1862135&key=Daddy%2CDoms

http://www.collarchat.com/fb.asp?m=545105&key=Daddy%2CDoms

http://www.collarchat.com/fb.asp?m=603904&key=Daddy%2CDoms

http://www.collarchat.com/fb.asp?m=1180378&key=Daddy%2CDoms

http://www.collarchat.com/fb.asp?m=851044&key=Daddy%2CDoms

http://www.collarchat.com/fb.asp?m=1459221&key=Daddy%2CDoms

http://www.collarchat.com/fb.asp?m=826788&key=Daddy%2CDoms

http://www.collarchat.com/fb.asp?m=547892&key=Daddy%2CDoms

http://www.collarchat.com/fb.asp?m=1767901&key=Daddy%2CDoms

http://www.collarchat.com/fb.asp?m=1708708&key=Daddy%2CDoms

It's about caring and protection, for some, but not all people, there may be some ageplay involved, it's about helping her grow as a person, so very many different things and yet it's unique and different based on your needs, wants and personal dynamic.

For us, (I met my Daddy here on CM and we were married last October) I wouldn't have Him any other way. He hs helped me tremendously, shows me unconditional love, punishes me when I need it, and teaches me when I need that. He guides and protects me, from myself and others, as needed. He is all I was looking for in a Master and I found so much more. [;)]

Good luck.




crazyredhead1957 -> RE: Daddy (3/11/2009 4:09:17 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Rainfire

It's about caring and protection, for some, but not all people, there may be some ageplay involved, it's about helping her grow as a person, so very many different things and yet it's unique and different based on your needs, wants and personal dynamic.

For us, (I met my Daddy here on CM and we were married last October) I wouldn't have Him any other way. He hs helped me tremendously, shows me unconditional love, punishes me when I need it, and teaches me when I need that. He guides and protects me, from myself and others, as needed. He is all I was looking for in a Master and I found so much more. [;)]

Good luck.



Wonderfully said.




DomM&SubK -> RE: Daddy (3/11/2009 5:09:08 AM)

I my self used to think the "Daddy" Label should be kept out of the bed room till I meet My Sir there are times I will sit at his feet with my head on his lap and call him "Big Daddy" We have a 3 year old and hence the big daddy part from me. But those are the times when I want to be taught more or the times he is teaching me. Or the times I just feel like I need to be with out all of the strings with mother hood and being a Step parent for a few moments of alone time.
I have even crawled up in his lap when he has come home from being at work all day and said “Big Daddy I need some alone time and a bubble bath will you watch her so I can have some alone time” and there are times I get yes honey I can or honey lets get a sitter and you can bathe me and I will bathe you. Yes he is old enough to be my father but he isn’t my father was an Ass Hole before he died.
And Sir has had to deal with a lot of issues from what my Father has done to me and my mother.
So here is something I think that you as a Dom need to know is if you do not feel like being a "Daddy" you don’t have to be you will find who you are and if it brings you to the "Daddy" status than so be it but she was right that if you don’t feel it that it cant be rushed.
I hope that this has helped you.




lovingpet -> RE: Daddy (3/11/2009 4:21:57 PM)

For me, it is about a return to innocence, trust, and faith in the good in people.  I know that sounds almost like I am trying to undo some damage from the past.  I am and I am not.  There were things I missed out on in childhood that I want a chance at. There are also a lot of things I can only discover about myself when I let down the walls of adulthood and face the world like a little child.  That means I am just as exposed to said world and all the dangers of it as I was when I was little and needed adult protection and guidance.  I want someone who can allow me the safety to re explore the world that way.

I believe it is a natural part of a lot of dominant personalities.  Some are exclusively in this role or mindset and for others it is something that they grow into.  It is as individual as the relationship and the people involved in it.  I can approach D/s from many directions and enjoy them.  It is a specific dynamic that happens to work for me in a very select number of cases.  My guess is that the girl was basically asking you if you would take ownership of her.  Your questions were likely perceived as judgement even if it is not how they were intended. 

I don't know if this rambling answered your question, but feel free to message me on the other side if you would like to discuss it at length.

lovingpet




DavanKael -> RE: Daddy (3/11/2009 5:39:25 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: lovingpet

For me, it is about a return to innocence, trust, and faith in the good in people.  I know that sounds almost like I am trying to undo some damage from the past.  I am and I am not.  There were things I missed out on in childhood that I want a chance at. There are also a lot of things I can only discover about myself when I let down the walls of adulthood and face the world like a little child.  That means I am just as exposed to said world and all the dangers of it as I was when I was little and needed adult protection and guidance.  I want someone who can allow me the safety to re explore the world that way.

I believe it is a natural part of a lot of dominant personalities.  Some are exclusively in this role or mindset and for others it is something that they grow into.  It is as individual as the relationship and the people involved in it.  I can approach D/s from many directions and enjoy them.  It is a specific dynamic that happens to work for me in a very select number of cases.  My guess is that the girl was basically asking you if you would take ownership of her.  Your questions were likely perceived as judgement even if it is not how they were intended. 

I don't know if this rambling answered your question, but feel free to message me on the other side if you would like to discuss it at length.

lovingpet


How beautifully said, Lovingpet.  Having a protector is definitely a priority for me in partnering with another. 
  Davan




lovingpet -> RE: Daddy (3/12/2009 5:56:13 AM)

Thank you Davan! 

Where is our OP?

lovingpet




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