Seeking Mentor (Full Version)

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Missmagon -> Seeking Mentor (1/24/2006 4:47:41 AM)

Hello everyone,
I am relatively new to bringing my natural tendency to life to be dominant. I have been reading the message boards and it has been suggested to obtain a mentor.

Would anyone be interested in becoming my mentor and guiding me to become a good domme/owner.

Please leave me a message directly on here or privately to my email on this site.
Thank you.

Missmagon[;)]



sunshine333 -> RE: Seeking Mentor (1/24/2006 4:56:49 AM)

Missmagon ...
good for you for being wise enough to say you need help. that is one of the most admirable qualities, in my opinion, that a dominant can have. most have egos too big to make a statement and request like yours.

a suggestion, if i may ... read a lot of the posts. then decide for yourself who you might want to consider mentoring you. there are many intelligent, experienced dominants on this site ... although it's hard to tell from just posts ... but it's a great place to start. also ... you might want to put your post on ask a Master or ask a Mistress section also.

i wish you the best of luck.

humbly,
sunshine



FTopinMichigan -> RE: Seeking Mentor (1/24/2006 5:57:26 AM)

Welcome to the message boards, Missmagon.

You might consider if you're seeking a "submissive" to learn from, or a dominant. This forum (that you posted in) is for submissives primarily. Most Dom/mes that request a mentor seem to seek out same orientation.

For me, while many "dominants" were able to offer information on techinques, etc., the most useful information I learned came from submissives themselves. Who better to help you understand the motivations and pleasures of a sub, than a submissive person themselves.

Enjoy your journey.
K



Petruchio -> RE: Seeking Mentor (1/24/2006 9:01:35 PM)

It's not unusual to share 'domhood' with someone. I don't know if you have switch tendencies, but some couples work in tandem that way.



MrDiscipline44 -> RE: Seeking Mentor (1/24/2006 9:57:22 PM)

If you are looking for realtime, I would suggest looking around you local BDSM community. Reading posts helps and you can get alot of good information from here but nothing takes the place of first hand experience, in my book. Welcome to the boards and good luck. God knows we all need it once in a while.



blackpearl81 -> RE: Seeking Mentor (2/1/2006 10:19:14 PM)

I also have an interest in finding someone who will be a mentor to me in the lifestyle..
also.. is it common that the mentor/pupil attend munches?

The reason I ask.. I've wanted to attend a munch for a while now.. but I've been too intimidated to go by myself (kinda silly i know) I was just thinking that it might be easier if i had someone to go with.. so i wouldnt be tottally oblivious as to what is going on during the munch itself...

Thank you for any information anyone has regarding this :)

*BP*



veronicaofML -> RE: Seeking Mentor (2/1/2006 10:35:47 PM)

i cannot help You as a dominant...but
if ya ever wanna hear about service-only stuff...lemme know.
be glad to talk to Ya here.

welcome!



Sensualips -> RE: Seeking Mentor (2/2/2006 3:49:58 AM)

BPearl, I often attend munches alone and the first time it was VERY intimidating...but not nearly so bad once I walked through the door. But yes, lots of people attend alone.

If you know of your local munch there is probably a contact person. Email ahead of time and let them know this is your first munch, you will be coming alone, and can they make you aware of what to expect. Not only will their answer make you feel more comfortable, but they may assign you a "buddy" or at least know you are new and make some effort to greet and introduce you.




JohnWarren -> RE: Seeking Mentor (2/2/2006 5:13:47 AM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: blackpearl81

I also have an interest in finding someone who will be a mentor to me in the lifestyle..
also.. is it common that the mentor/pupil attend munches?

The reason I ask.. I've wanted to attend a munch for a while now.. but I've been too intimidated to go by myself (kinda silly i know) I was just thinking that it might be easier if i had someone to go with.. so i wouldnt be tottally oblivious as to what is going on during the munch itself...

Thank you for any information anyone has regarding this :)

*BP*


You don't even need a mentor to do this. Just find someone in your area and arrange to meet near the munch so you can walk in together. I know it does help. Libby and I regularly met new people just so they'd have someone they were comfortable with while attending munches, socials and classes.





lilliebitch -> RE: Seeking Mentor (2/2/2006 6:28:11 AM)

wow a mentor< what a good idea instead of wasting time with time wasters a mentor could really really help



LuckyAlbatross -> RE: Seeking Mentor (2/2/2006 7:13:02 AM)

So if you're new, what makes you think you have the good judgement to decide who is a good mentor for you?

And if you have the good judgement, why do you need a mentor?



Arpig -> RE: Seeking Mentor (2/2/2006 7:34:31 AM)

quote:

So if you're new, what makes you think you have the good judgement to decide who is a good mentor for you?

And if you have the good judgement, why do you need a mentor?

A good question, if not exactly a reassuring (and no, I am not intentionally following you around the boards this morning - after posting this i am going to the store to let you get ahead of me so i will have to catch up [;)])
Now on to the OP...If you feel you need a mentor, then indeed the boards are a good place to start, to try find someone here who seems to have the style you like, learn from them what you can, and then seek out somebody local who has a similar style, because as MrDiscipline said
quote:

nothing takes the place of first hand experience

And back to LuckyA's somewhat socratic question....I think she has a point, if you feel you can tell a good mentor, then presumably you have in mind some specific traits and or qualities, simply foster those traits/qualities in yourself.
The other thing I would say is to not fall into the trap of taking yourself too seriously, after all this lifestyle is supposed to be fun.



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