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Harness for Nexus - 3/15/2009 11:09:46 PM   
ddogg2


Posts: 18
Joined: 1/6/2009
Status: offline 		I am thinking about buying a strapon and have chosen a Nexus.   I think it will be the best so that she can experience the pleasure at the same time.   I am a beginner and so is she.  There is tons of harness's out there but I am not sure what a good harness is for a Nexus.   Can anyone recommend a good harness for a Nexus.   I guess whats important is fit and adjustability?
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RE: Harness for Nexus - 3/16/2009 6:42:08 AM   
RichieB


Posts: 87
Joined: 8/30/2008
Status: offline 		It would depend on her size. For me the Texas Two Strap harness fits just right with the Nexus...


Diane

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RE: Harness for Nexus - 3/16/2009 9:07:57 AM   
LadyHibiscus


Posts: 27124
Joined: 8/15/2005
From: Island Of Misfit Toys
Status: offline 		I made my own harness from a thong panty...  all it took was the panty, a rubber O-ring and a few stitches, and it works far better than all the buckles and straps.  Now if only these doubles would stay in place on their own!

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RE: Harness for Nexus - 3/16/2009 10:35:07 AM   
RichieB


Posts: 87
Joined: 8/30/2008
Status: offline 		Thank you LH...I'm going to try this..

Diane

quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyHibiscus

I made my own harness from a thong panty...  all it took was the panty, a rubber O-ring and a few stitches, and it works far better than all the buckles and straps.  Now if only these doubles would stay in place on their own!


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RE: Harness for Nexus - 3/16/2009 12:36:14 PM   
DavanKael


Posts: 3072
Joined: 10/6/2007
Status: offline 		Custom design is the way to go.  Off-the-rack suck, imo and ime. 
  Davan

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RE: Harness for Nexus - 3/16/2009 1:01:25 PM   
LadyPact


Posts: 32566
Status: offline 		I've told Lady H this a few times before.  It's an absolutely excellent idea that she came up with there.

I do have a question though for the OP.  Why isn't she going through the shopping process with you?


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RE: Harness for Nexus - 3/16/2009 1:32:17 PM   
RichieB


Posts: 87
Joined: 8/30/2008
Status: offline 		The Jaguar and the Texas Two strap harnesses fit me as good  as my custom made ones do...

Diane


quote:

ORIGINAL: DavanKael

Custom design is the way to go.  Off-the-rack suck, imo and ime. 
Davan


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RE: Harness for Nexus - 3/16/2009 1:59:06 PM   
AAkasha


Posts: 4429
Joined: 11/27/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: ddogg2

I am thinking about buying a strapon and have chosen a Nexus.   I think it will be the best so that she can experience the pleasure at the same time.   I am a beginner and so is she.  There is tons of harness's out there but I am not sure what a good harness is for a Nexus.   Can anyone recommend a good harness for a Nexus.   I guess whats important is fit and adjustability?


Let her decide what is most important to her, not you. There's nothing more annoying than a man picking out a strap on 'for comfort and pleasure' for me -- I mean, c'mon, does he know how my clit feels when I fuck a man with a latex dick?  It varies.  She may also be more into the psychological aspect of it, in which case, overstimulation can ruin it.  Find out what HER goals are and either let her pick it out, or support her during the process.  You can't assume how she processes pleasure.  Especially for a beginner.

Akasha


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RE: Harness for Nexus - 3/16/2009 2:43:10 PM   
LadyHibiscus


Posts: 27124
Joined: 8/15/2005
From: Island Of Misfit Toys
Status: offline 		I have found that so many of the beautiful harnesses are just a pain to adjust!  If I am going to go prancing around with my faux unit on, okay, then it's part of the costume.  If I want to just have at it,  I want SPEED and comfort. 

Though if anyone wants to get me one of those harnesses with the sparkly PVC or whatever?  Thx in advance, eh!

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RE: Harness for Nexus - 3/16/2009 8:47:47 PM   
ddogg2


Posts: 18
Joined: 1/6/2009
Status: offline
quote:

Texas Two Strap harness
quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyPact

I do have a question though for the OP.  Why isn't she going through the shopping process with you?



I have discussed it a little with her and am still feeling her out.   I am doing research now as I know she knows nothing about the subject.   I think she would be too chicken to go into a store and shop for this kind of item.   With so many different harness's to choose from I want some recommendations.   From what I have read here many like the double dildoe versions so I am going to suggest that she starts with that.   Of course its up to her and she just might ask for me to surprise her.   She is not the dominant decision maker here.

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RE: Harness for Nexus - 3/16/2009 8:52:47 PM   
RichieB


Posts: 87
Joined: 8/30/2008
Status: offline 		Here's a good site for beginners...

http://mistress160.blogspot.com/2007/08/bdsm-for-beginners-part-11-strap-on-sex.html


Diane

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RE: Harness for Nexus - 3/16/2009 9:01:21 PM   
ddogg2


Posts: 18
Joined: 1/6/2009
Status: offline 		In a related question
Can someone identify the dildoe that is used with this harness?
http://www.stockroom.com/La-Strap-On-Low-Rise-P3262.aspx


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RE: Harness for Nexus - 3/16/2009 9:09:31 PM   
RichieB


Posts: 87
Joined: 8/30/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: ddogg2

In a related question
Can someone identify the dildoe that is used with this harness?
http://www.stockroom.com/La-Strap-On-Low-Rise-P3262.aspx




http://www.goodvibes.com/display_product.jhtml?id=13BA27&lid=listing

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RE: Harness for Nexus - 3/17/2009 5:06:58 AM   
LadyPact


Posts: 32566
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: ddogg2

quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyPact

I do have a question though for the OP.  Why isn't she going through the shopping process with you?



I have discussed it a little with her and am still feeling her out.   I am doing research now as I know she knows nothing about the subject.   I think she would be too chicken to go into a store and shop for this kind of item.   With so many different harness's to choose from I want some recommendations.   From what I have read here many like the double dildoe versions so I am going to suggest that she starts with that.   Of course its up to her and she just might ask for me to surprise her.   She is not the dominant decision maker here.


Please keep something in mind as I'm writing My comments to you this morning.  I haven't quite had enough caffeine yet.

I do realize that you are the Dominant in your dynamic.  I've read this thread and the other one that you started on the subject.  Based on both of them, I do have some advice for you.

Get this thing "felt out" before you proceed.  There's something about the content of your posts that leads Me to believe that she isn't quite as excited about this idea as you are.  I can't quite put My finger on it, but it's there. 

The two of you don't have to shop for a strap-on in person.  You could be sitting in front of the same computer and do some cyber shopping.  That eliminates the need for her to encounter any embarrassment that you don't want to subject her to.  (Of course, that is a fun game, but that's another thread.)  That should give you a better idea about how she really feels about the use of your upcoming purchase.  It will give you better insight on what she thinks of the future activity with you.  Don't surprise her with it.  That's a huge mistake that some males make.

The questions that you're asking about a harness are going to vary between different folks.  There are three of us who have responded in this thread who are going to give you different answers because we're different body types.  If you want recommendations that are going to work, knowing what body type she is would be helpful.


_____________________________

The crowned Diva of Destruction. ~ ExT

Beach Ball Sized Lady Nuts. ~ TWD

Happily dating a new submissive. It's official. I've named him engie.

Please do not send me email here. Unless I know you, I will delete the email unread

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RE: Harness for Nexus - 3/17/2009 8:10:44 AM   
AAkasha


Posts: 4429
Joined: 11/27/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: ddogg2

quote:

Texas Two Strap harness
quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyPact

I do have a question though for the OP.  Why isn't she going through the shopping process with you?



I have discussed it a little with her and am still feeling her out.   I am doing research now as I know she knows nothing about the subject.   I think she would be too chicken to go into a store and shop for this kind of item.   With so many different harness's to choose from I want some recommendations.   From what I have read here many like the double dildoe versions so I am going to suggest that she starts with that.   Of course its up to her and she just might ask for me to surprise her.   She is not the dominant decision maker here.



Make sure after you have purchased this "gift" you come back and share how it all played out and how much she is using it and enjoying it. It's a helpful lesson for everyone to read what not to do.  You are doing this entirely the wrong way with zero consideration for her comfort level and interest.  In a year, if you are still together, we can look for the thread "My girlfriend had a really bad experience with strapons and now we're trying to start over from scratch."  There is nothing less empowering, sexy or fun than a guy presenting a dildo harness to a woman that he picked out for "her" enjoyment. You may as well go pick out trashy lingerie off a rack and give it to her and say, "I thought this would make YOU feel SEXY."  See the problem?

Akasha


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Profile   Post #: 15
RE: Harness for Nexus - 3/18/2009 9:20:43 PM   
ddogg2


Posts: 18
Joined: 1/6/2009
Status: offline 		wow do guys really do that?
Believe me I would never have zero consideration for her feelings.   I would never just spring something on someone like that.    This is a weird enough topic for most woman.   Like I said I am just doing research.   If she says go buy it yourself I am prepared.   If she says lets go shopping then I know a little about the subject.   Geeze give me a break here.   Oh and I never buy trashy lingerie.   Always have gone shopping together with the woman I was with.

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RE: Harness for Nexus - 3/18/2009 9:39:16 PM   
LaMistressa


Posts: 460
Joined: 12/4/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: ddogg2

wow do guys really do that?
Believe me I would never have zero consideration for her feelings.   I would never just spring something on someone like that.    This is a weird enough topic for most woman.  


Not for women who like strap on play, it's not a weird topic. I was going to suggest the terra firma harness (which is what I use with my Nexus Jr. and Nexus Maximus), but I also do have to agree with the others that it doesn't sound like its her idea at all.

Whatever you do, good luck.

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Profile   Post #: 17
RE: Harness for Nexus - 3/19/2009 5:46:17 AM   
LadyHibiscus


Posts: 27124
Joined: 8/15/2005
From: Island Of Misfit Toys
Status: offline 		I know I have recommended this in the past, there is a fab video that you can get from goodvibes.com called "Bend Over Boyfriend", which is a great intro to the practise.  There's a second one that I haven't seen, but I suspect it is just as good.  Carol Queen produced them both, and her approach is stellar.

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