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RE: When to give up - 3/18/2009 12:14:58 PM

GoodgirlFind

Posts: 55
Joined: 6/24/2007
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Wait a little bit longer and you could find that being rude is rife among all people of all levels of experience. The basic truth is NO ONE can tell you WHY those people were rude to you. Probably not even those people in question. I read your profile Renskor. You're a very nice person so don't let them get to you..

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RE: When to give up - 3/18/2009 7:32:17 PM

thetammyjo

Posts: 6322
Joined: 9/8/2005
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quote:

ORIGINAL: Renskor

Thanks.

I was on here last year and deleted my profile cos i was so sick of timewasters ect. This profile is only a few days old, i dont wanna be making enemies already. Would it be better to just ignore it?

Ignore it.

In fact, block it if you can so you don't ever waste your time on this person again.

if it happens with another person and yet another, then that's when you need to figure out what they have in common and why you find yourself approaching that type of person.

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RE: When to give up - 3/18/2009 7:56:56 PM

Renskor

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Thank you all for your amazing replies will do :)

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RE: When to give up - 3/18/2009 9:01:45 PM

MsDDom

Posts: 368
Joined: 1/1/2009
From: GA
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quote:

"Stupid little boy, what possible use could you be to me?"

this place is what it is...the good and the bad. i wont take sides here b/c i dont know both sides...
yet, u ultimately have to decide who u will and will not deal w/ and what is ur limit w/ people on this site. there r some good and great people here---and the are some bad and horrible people here as well.

ur tolerance level will dictate how u deal w/ folks and handle specific situations.

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... live Life honestly ...

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RE: When to give up - 3/18/2009 9:12:44 PM

Nikolette

Posts: 488
Joined: 10/2/2004
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Renskor:

I didn't read all the replies, but most of what I saw seemed to indicate something to the effect of: Oh she's a wretched bitch and its only going to be worse!!!

Which could be the case. But since this is a BDSM personal's site she could also have meant it in a playful flirty manner, and hopes to see what kind of amusing retort you have to respond with. Maybe an awkward choice given the fact that you two are (I'm assuming) strangers and it could be taken in a multitude of ways (as evidenced here), but its possible.

I have responded with similar half playful/half catty lines, usually not to long polite emails, granted... but I didn't ever mean it in an all out bitch way to be rude and alienate someone. But heck. Maybe I am just a rigid dour bitch in general after all.

But I digress. If it were me, I'd probably try to feel the person out, respond with something playful and close with, "You were just teasing, right?" and see what happens. Maybe she wasn't. Maybe she'll be even meaner. But maybe she is playful and spontaneous and fabulous on the other hand and was just in a "mood".

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RE: When to give up - 3/18/2009 9:50:44 PM

ElanSubdued

Posts: 1511
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Nikolette,

quote:

Nikolette to Renskor:
But since this is a BDSM personals site she could also have meant it in a playful flirty manner, and hopes to see what kind of amusing retort you have to respond with. Maybe an awkward choice given the fact that you two are (I'm assuming) strangers and it could be taken in a multitude of ways (as evidenced here), but its possible.

I have responded with similar half playful/half catty lines, usually not to long polite emails, granted... but I didn't ever mean it in an all out bitch way to be rude and alienate someone. But heck. Maybe I am just a rigid dour bitch in general after all.

I'm glad you presented a differing point of view; I see where you're coming from. Still, sometimes you get multiple shots at something and other times you only get one - and this applies to both dominants and submissives. Were I in Renskor's position receiving the response he did, that would be the last I approached the dominant in question. Perhaps the woman was being playful and flirty, or maybe, as you point out, she was "just in a *mood*". No matter how you slice it, I'd not want to deal with this person. Sure, if there was already some rapport established, perhaps such an approach would tickle my funny bone or challenge me to come up with a clever reply. In this context though, I find the reply simply rude. And call me a weirdo, but I don't find rudeness the least bit inviting, endearing, or attractive.

Granted, I'll provide the following addendum/exception to my comments above. We've not seen Renskor's introduction letter. Perhaps the boy isn't as sweet and innocent as he appears!

Elan.

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RE: When to give up - 3/18/2009 10:10:52 PM

wilfulslave

Posts: 2
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I would like to meat a lady that has what it takes, that can make me want to follow her lead...

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RE: When to give up - 3/19/2009 2:14:23 AM

LadyPact

Posts: 32566
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Personally, I will shoot off certain replies to people who make it so completely obvious that they haven't read My profile. Probably not the reply you got in return to your email, but I will point out to people why I'm not willing to correspond with them. This includes people who want Me to share My experiences or come across as they are just looking to hear a fantasy. I hate to say it, but you'd be amazed at some of the things that come in the mail. That's even including the ones who are polite.

Do yourself a favor and make sure you read the profile of anyone that you're hoping to correspond with. It will help to reduce what could be seen as rude replies.

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RE: When to give up - 3/19/2009 2:28:06 AM

Vendaval

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The block, delete and ignore functions are great tools here. Don't waste your time worrying about rude people.

to the Forums.

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RE: When to give up - 3/19/2009 3:06:56 AM

beeble

Posts: 799
Joined: 5/25/2005
From: UK
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quote:

Which could be the case. But since this is a BDSM personal's site she could also have meant it in a playful flirty manner, and hopes to see what kind of amusing retort you have to respond with. Maybe an awkward choice given the fact that you two are (I'm assuming) strangers and it could be taken in a multitude of ways (as evidenced here), but its possible.

Assuming that the OP's letter was polite and reasonable, this leaves three possibilities.

She's an asshole. Not a good sign.
She was being flirty or playful. Sending an offensive-looking remark as first communication to somebody suggests, to me, a lack of judgment and consideration. That, or she completely misread the OP's character and thought he'd be amused or intrigued by such a response. Either way, not a good sign.
Being in a mood causes her to lash out at near-strangers. Not a good sign.

None of the three possibilities raised suggests a woman I would want to give power over me.

beeble.

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RE: When to give up - 3/19/2009 7:26:10 AM

FullfigRIMAAM1

Posts: 1160
Joined: 11/20/2008
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quote:

ORIGINAL: Kana
"Stupid little boy, what possible use could you be to me?"
Awww, flirting.

Renskor, I think this reply by Kana is the best to send to the jerk that answered your polite email so inappropriately.
As to when to give up, you're only 19yo... You shouldn't even think of giving up; you should think of building stamina, and learning how to be a gentleman who makes ladies swoon because of how kind, thoughtful and respectful he can be.

Make yourself desirable, and even the ladies that don't chase boys down will pay attention to you.

M

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