RE: How do you feel about submitting to someone younger?

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sambamanslilgirl -> RE: How do you feel about submitting to someone younger? (4/3/2009 11:01:24 AM)
if you're young enough to be one of my ums and/or brothers, i would turn you down in a heartbeat. i cannot submit to someone who is that young - i know others can and have but for me personally, i would prefer someone closer to my age or older. age maybe just a number however it's all about having other general things common beyond the kink

Lordandmaster -> RE: How do you feel about submitting to someone younger? (4/3/2009 2:42:03 PM)
I'm having a little trouble understanding why a dom needs to have bought cars or homes in order to be a dom--or, for that matter, why you'd assume that someone younger than you has never owned a car worth more than $1,000. No one you meet in life can possibly be more informed than you about EVERYTHING. Inevitably, there's going to be some area where you know more than your dom, regardless of who is older. That can't be a deal-breaker. quote: ORIGINAL: DesFIP For bedroom only submission it is relatively unimportant. For other parts of life, it can be important. Could you make an informed decision of what new car to buy when you've only owned cars costing less than $1,000? Are you capable of reading the fine print on loan agreements to decide if the car company financing is better than the banks? With age comes a certain amount of experience. I've bought cars, bought homes, built homes, etc. I would have a great deal of difficulty even listening to advice from someone who hasn't had any of this experience, let alone allowing him to make such a decision.

LaTigresse -> RE: How do you feel about submitting to someone younger? (4/3/2009 2:48:09 PM)
I've seen 60 yo morons who did an excellent job of screwing, almost every facet of their life, up. I've seen 30 yo's that I would personally trust with my life, not to mention my finances, and most important of all, the welfare of short people. Age doesn't mean shit in my world. (cept when voting or buying me a drink......)[:D]

Juliannadelion -> RE: How do you feel about submitting to someone younger? (4/3/2009 2:55:18 PM)
My Lord is seventeen and a half years younger than I am. I am currently 40 and he will be 23 in June. I have never been happier, more content, or satisfied. He is everything I ever could have hoped for and then some. I have never been loved so deeply, so genuinely, so affectionately, as I have by him. He is beautiful, wonderful and just utterly amazing and I will dedicate the rest of my life to him and his wants and desires. There are alot of people who think we should not be together because of the age difference. They find something wrong with the fact that we are able to relate to each other, to love each other and to have fun together. Thank goodness neither one of us gives a crap what the populace at large thinks. My first dominant was 10yrs older than I was, and we had a miserable relationship for three and a half years. So, I do not believe age has anything to do with it. But, I have been enlightened by the love and desire of my Lord. [:D]

DesFIP -> RE: How do you feel about submitting to someone younger? (4/3/2009 6:04:45 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Lordandmaster I'm having a little trouble understanding why a dom needs to have bought cars or homes in order to be a dom--or, for that matter, why you'd assume that someone younger than you has never owned a car worth more than $1,000. No one you meet in life can possibly be more informed than you about EVERYTHING. Inevitably, there's going to be some area where you know more than your dom, regardless of who is older. That can't be a deal-breaker. Not that someone younger than I am, someone the op's age is unlikely to have bought a car. I wanted someone who I could mesh my life with, not just meet for beat & fuck. My life includes the way I live, my education level, my upbringing and feeling comfortable with in all the areas of my life. A kid the same age as my oldest, like the op, isn't going to fit into my life. Nor I his. I wouldn't know or like his music, I hear enough of it from my kids. I would have nothing in common with his friends. My concerns are totally different. But just as I needed someone compatible on an age level, I also needed one compatible on a socioeconomic level. Someone who knows which fork to use at an ambassador's dinner party. Someone whom I have enough in common with to talk to about what concerns me, which may well include economic issues. For fun & games, meeting at the dungeon, you don't need much in common except on a superficial level. No more than you need any more in common with a tennis partner than being on the same level of ability. For melding lives, you do. I don't want to have to give up anything to be in this relationship. I wanted it to enrich me, not make me lesser.

crazyredhead1957 -> RE: How do you feel about submitting to someone younger? (4/3/2009 7:12:17 PM)
i am 51 as i write this and i have dated People from 20 years younger to 10 years older than myself in the past. To me, it's an individual thing. i don't judge on the basis of age, i'm very open-minded.

TaoWoman -> RE: How do you feel about submitting to someone younger? (4/3/2009 7:16:25 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: DesFIP For bedroom only submission it is relatively unimportant. For other parts of life, it can be important. Could you make an informed decision of what new car to buy when you've only owned cars costing less than $1,000? Are you capable of reading the fine print on loan agreements to decide if the car company financing is better than the banks? With age comes a certain amount of experience. I've bought cars, bought homes, built homes, etc. I would have a great deal of difficulty even listening to advice from someone who hasn't had any of this experience, let alone allowing him to make such a decision. I am in this camp, literally. I only submit sexually - there is no man, regardless of his age that can make the best life choices for me. But in the sexual arena, a young man exhibiting confidence, sensuality and dominance is practically irresistible. For me, age ceases to exist and chemistry reigns. Infact my first experience in this realm came 3 years ago at age 43 in the hands of a beautiful 24 yr old [;)]

HollywoodExecDom -> RE: How do you feel about submitting to someone younger? (4/3/2009 7:23:10 PM)
I'm a Dom, been for a bit, but still rather young. When I first started, I got this same issue over and over. Factually, I was a bit inexperienced, but I also made up for it by reading a lot, scripting my sessions much much tighter, and being overly imaginative in what I set out for scenes and sessions... in the end, I actually will say I was better in my first scenes than I am in scenes now ironically enough, mostly because now I am much more loose about scripting out a session. Still, you will encounter a lot of subs that aren't attracted to younger subs, often for the reason that they like the Daddy / daughter dynamic or associate Dominant energy with older - and that's just the way it is... but frankly, you have far more options at 21 than 50 year olds have, simply because there are so many 50 year old Doms, and so many subs grossed out by wrinkled old men. Nevertheless, you have to understand that young men, regardless of maturity, come across as less dominant because of the messages of society. If D/s is a lot about fantasy, you'd be hard pressed to say that media images tend to favor 21 year olds over 34 year olds in terms of the Dominant label... You don't see that many cop dramas, hero epics, etc. focusing on young 20 year olds, and when they do, they make them whinny like Luke Skywalker or Frodo. It just takes that much more effort to match the inherent advantage a 34 year old has based on societal cues - but there are plenty of girls who like to date their age still. The good thing is that your peak is still in front of you - 27-35 ish...

iwearpanties -> RE: How do you feel about submitting to someone younger? (4/4/2009 2:33:03 AM)
Id like to ask would a younger Mistresss be more into play or would she be just learning all about this her sefl same would be wondered about male Doms too

eyesopened -> RE: How do you feel about submitting to someone younger? (4/4/2009 5:15:18 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Lordandmaster I'm having a little trouble understanding why a dom needs to have bought cars or homes in order to be a dom--or, for that matter, why you'd assume that someone younger than you has never owned a car worth more than $1,000. No one you meet in life can possibly be more informed than you about EVERYTHING. Inevitably, there's going to be some area where you know more than your dom, regardless of who is older. That can't be a deal-breaker. quote: ORIGINAL: DesFIP For bedroom only submission it is relatively unimportant. For other parts of life, it can be important. Could you make an informed decision of what new car to buy when you've only owned cars costing less than $1,000? Are you capable of reading the fine print on loan agreements to decide if the car company financing is better than the banks? With age comes a certain amount of experience. I've bought cars, bought homes, built homes, etc. I would have a great deal of difficulty even listening to advice from someone who hasn't had any of this experience, let alone allowing him to make such a decision. Actually, my Master wouldn't have much use for a slave who had less experience, less knowledge, the exact same or fewer talents than Himself. By possessing me, He own all my talents, experiences, knowledge and wisdom and has use of them. My Master has never offered advice to me in matters where my knowledge or experience exceeds His. And while I am 9 years His senior, He has far more experience and talents in many areas that I do not.

kidwithknife -> RE: How do you feel about submitting to someone younger? (4/4/2009 6:02:26 AM)
Warkirby, Are there submissives who aren't going to be interesting in you because of your age? Yep, absolutely. (There are submissives I'm too young for and I'm a fair bit older than you). There are also submissives who aren't going to be interested in you because they prefer short haired men, hate heavy metal music, are devoutly religious, have completely different kinks to you, are lesbian etc. And I'm sure you have a similiar number of reasons why you might not be interested in someone. It's not a matter of age. It's simply that actually finding someone you're properly compatible with isn't that easy most of the time for anybody of us, particuarly if you're after a relationship as opposed to just play. It is possible that your age is disadvantaging you to an extent. On the other hand, you're intelligent, you can spell and punctuate correctly, you have a decently written profile etc. Swings and roundabouts. And it's important not to overstate it. I've seen a good number of profiles from submissives specifically looking for someone around their own age. However, if you're specifically into submissives who are significantly older than you than you absolutely have a right to that personal preference. But, being honest, if that's the case I do think you've got a more difficult search than most. A word of caution. It can get frustrating if you're mailing with no luck. It happens to the best of us. And it's possible that you will be rejected specifically because of your age. What you absolutely shouldn't do in response is post a bitter screed on the forum. Claiming that any submissive with an age preference is bigoted and making grandiose statements like "don't they know what they're missing!?". Because that won't change the mind of a single submissive who prefers older dominants. But it's highly likely to put off some who don't. Don't start threads about not getting replies either. (To be clear, I don't think you've done this here. But I thought it was worth mentioning as it's vaguely common on here. And its never a good idea).

Asherdelampyr -> RE: How do you feel about submitting to someone younger? (4/4/2009 10:46:17 AM)
Waves Hi, im 22. I have owned 4 vehicles, the first one was 300 dollars, the second 8000, the third 33,000 the fourth 1600 I make more at my age than most people in this state as a technical professional. I havent owned a house, because I havent decided what state I want to spend that much time living in. I would not be offended if someone said I was too young/inexperienced, whatever. However I do find it silly to think that just because I am young that there are all these things I have never done, or that I never learned proper etiquette. (I was taught better than that) Now if we are talking preference, then that is completely different. You can only like 1 legged doms with an eye patch and van dyke beards if ya want, it's all the same to me (Unless I lose my leg and eye :P

InTonguesslut -> RE: How do you feel about submitting to someone younger? (4/4/2009 11:20:25 AM)
I never say never but in general i don't date men younger than me. I find men older than me 5 - 10 years much more physically, mentally and emotionally attractive. I also like to scene with men who have plenty of experience, i know this doesn't always come with age, i feel much safer.

slavekal -> RE: How do you feel about submitting to someone younger? (4/4/2009 12:41:56 PM)
In the past couple of decades, almost all my Mistresses have been younger. That can be even hotter, actually. A very young Mistress can easily command a mature, worldly man.

EchoMirage -> RE: How do you feel about submitting to someone younger? (4/4/2009 5:23:53 PM)
quote: Not that someone younger than I am, someone the op's age is unlikely to have bought a car. A kid the same age as my oldest, like the op, isn't going to fit into my life. Nor I his. I wouldn't know or like his music, I hear enough of it from my kids. I would have nothing in common with his friends. My concerns are totally different. But just as I needed someone compatible on an age level, I also needed one compatible on a socioeconomic level. Someone who knows which fork to use at an ambassador's dinner party. Someone whom I have enough in common with to talk to about what concerns me, which may well include economic issues. For melding lives, you do. I don't want to have to give up anything to be in this relationship. I wanted it to enrich me, not make me lesser. you dont think someone can buy a car before 30?? i had a car at 17. bought another at 22. bought a brand new 02 Trans Am in 2001, when i was 24. 2 trucks later, and recently buying a house at 29. of course i understand the 'melding of lives' part, but dont you dare look down on someone's life experience, or a supposed lack thereof, just because of a number.

GravityPro -> RE: How do you feel about submitting to someone younger? (4/6/2009 1:10:49 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: HollywoodExecDom ... Nevertheless, you have to understand that young men, regardless of maturity, come across as less dominant because of the messages of society. If D/s is a lot about fantasy, you'd be hard pressed to say that media images tend to favor 21 year olds over 34 year olds in terms of the Dominant label... You don't see that many cop dramas, hero epics, etc. focusing on young 20 year olds, and when they do, they make them whinny like Luke Skywalker or Frodo. It just takes that much more effort to match the inherent advantage a 34 year old has based on societal cues - but there are plenty of girls who like to date their age still. The good thing is that your peak is still in front of you - 27-35 ish... Thank god I have that to look forward to. It's not that I haven't been referred to as 'mature for your age,' but there's a serious difference in having some good ideas and actually putting them into practice. It takes time and practice to get things right and some subs simply do not have time to wait for you to get over the learning curve. The more patient and loving ones will help you through this, but I've found that the amount of personal development needed to get from post-pubescent to adult can take longer than you expect. I've seen death and saved lives and lost friends in the process. At 23 I'm an old man, but that has no impact on my ability to live a complete life. I haven't made it yet, but I have some good ideas.

thesugarplum -> RE: How do you feel about submitting to someone younger? (4/6/2009 1:36:28 AM)
This is actually a good question. I personally could not submit to someone younger than me. Part of submitting to someone (in my tense) is the psyche of a Sir who is older, domineering, aggressive, punctual, intelligent, and who would of guessed - experienced. I need the man (or woman) who perspires dominance even in their vanilla state. I want to be able to taste them radiating dominance from 100 feet away. Hard to find, but I'm patient. As a young women, a man younger than me would be 21, 20, 19, 18.. and younger. I could never trust a person that young with my safety, and be sure that they would maintain their sanity. I prefer older, experienced males who aren't going to blindly tear me a part, and thinks when I say NO, I'm just playing for the offensive team just to be cute.

WyldHrt -> RE: How do you feel about submitting to someone younger? (4/6/2009 2:27:03 AM)
quote: Waves Hi, im 22. I have owned 4 vehicles, the first one was 300 dollars, the second 8000, the third 33,000 the fourth 1600 I make more at my age than most people in this state as a technical professional. I havent owned a house, because I havent decided what state I want to spend that much time living in. I would not be offended if someone said I was too young/inexperienced, whatever. However I do find it silly to think that just because I am young that there are all these things I have never done, or that I never learned proper etiquette. (I was taught better than that) Now if we are talking preference, then that is completely different. You can only like 1 legged doms with an eye patch and van dyke beards if ya want, it's all the same to me (Unless I lose my leg and eye :P Sweetness, you are SO the exception that proves the rule, and you know it. smooch I personally prefer a Dom that is older than I am, partially because I have always been more comfortable in the company of those older than myself, and also because I find older men physically attractive. It is rare for me to find a younger Dominant male who I honestly think could "handle" me (there are 2 here on the forums who are exceptions, lol), but I'm not completely ruling it out. To the OP, I will suggest that you continue to post on the forums. It never ceases to amaze me how many happy endings got their start here due to the fact that we all meet and play together as equals on the boards, getting to know each other and getting past differences in age and such. This is where you can relax, have fun, and get to know all kinds of folks without the pressure of impressing someone with a first cmail. Just be you, and see where it leads. Good luck!

VAcontroldom -> RE: How do you feel about submitting to someone younger? (4/6/2009 6:01:53 AM)
A couple of decades ago I was a younger dominant and I didn't whine about perceived discrimination keeping me from happiness. If you are the mature man you say you are and if your dominant qualities shine through, you should be able to attract submissive women in and near your age group naturally. So don't worry about it, go out and show you are a natural leader by organizing a beach cleanup. Prove you are the type of person who others look to by bringing change to your community despite your age, who can control a situation so that the women in the room can only see you when you walk in. Then this stuff doesn't matter, your behaviors will attract the right person. (Or behaviours since you are in the UK)

pinkwind -> RE: How do you feel about submitting to someone younger? (4/6/2009 6:12:38 AM)
Age is a funny thing, most of us older folk only meet relatively young people because they have children, mine are now 33 and 30. It can be hard to see past the comparison with your own children, no matter what age they have achieved, or what experience or social status they may have. Getting to know much younger people whose lives have been forged in a different generation, with different societal mores, let alone completely different likes and dislikes can prove difficult if either party cannot get past their own generational obstacles. All i can do is say that there are people who can put aside what could be seen as natural reticence, and i hope you find someone amongst them who ticks all the boxes!

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