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Real0ne -> RE: When You are the One rejected (1/30/2006 8:13:44 PM)
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quote:
ORIGINAL: theRose4U
quote:
Many of these boys think they are submissive, want to be submissive, but can't really let go of that control. That is why I get so much of "I want to be a slave, Ma'am, but not that much of a slave". I mean, isn't a slave is a slave is a slave? Even a submissive should be submissive. At least most of the time.
Sure you will find a lot of that when you are not a good match for them. if either of you try and pound a round pipe into square hole this will happen.
i have met many dommes who in the process of spending time with me wanted me to dom them for pete sake! Like 70% maybe.
One of the biggest problems i have is that if i do not feel comfotable enough with a person to give them that kind of control at the rate they want to take it. Oh sure we can scene and do play and domestic yard work and all else that comes up and i do just fine. but as soon as they think they are qualified to control my assets and i dont mean those, i mean my financial assets then things get serious.
i have met dommes that i would feel comfortable letting them control my assets, but very few. The fact of the matter is that many of single dommes i have met have lives that are a financial disaster. and now to be their slave i am going to trust my assets to them when they obviously cant take care of their own? no no kokomo!
quote:
ORIGINAL: theRose4U
I agree my boy come to me as a total novice that listed himself as a slave. After a long discussion with him about what did he MEAN by slave it appeared that he was more submissive with switch tendencies. Tendencies turned into bossiness turned into arguing about can't we just be 50-50 this isn't what I wanted, wouldn't you be happier if I just took care of things (meaning him in charge). For some reason he got offended when my answer was not just no but OH HEEEELLLL NO. [;)]
Rose, i feel bad that it happened to you and i offer you my condolences. i know how it feels to go thru extreme efforts to try and communicate with someone your intentions trusting that the feedback is accurate and honest. Based on what you said. the fact that he wanted 50 50 power i assume you meant, goes to show you that he was just sticking his toe in the water really. you may have been convenient for him. i mean i can understand someone saying hey this or that is really difficult can we do blah blah blah. but to go from slave to 50 50, ie nilla is just to big of a quantum leap to make sense. i sort of doubt you turned a dom lose and would wager you turned a nilla man or at best a kinky man loose.
you had no choice but to let him go and based on your story it is hard to believe he did anything but to deceive you i hate to say.
i know it does not help anyone feel better to say it has happened to all of us but i think many of us can identify with that unfortunately.
i do wish you the very best of luck and i do hope you dont harden your heart and are able to take it as a lesson and move on. Sometimes it just happens that people do that sort of thing and nothing you can really do about it without the possibility of ruining other potential opportunities you know... so you have to keep your chin up!
r1
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