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Embareesed by MAster - 4/20/2009 6:25:24 PM   
slave2train4pain


Posts: 20
Joined: 2/21/2009
Status: offline 		Although I am gay this question has nothing to do with sex and could have been posted in the Mistress board as well.  My Master is very controlling when he has play groups.  Everyone even Masters  submit to him and he controls who does what to who and when no exceptions.  At times this has interrupted other Master's  at a critical point in an act but they understand it and obey as a slave.  Sunday night Master invited a friend of his for group and to stay the night.  This part time slave, he is married and only plays with my Master and his groups.  During this group he kept straying out of the boundaries set by Master, I am not disputing Master's right to allow this, and he upset several of the regular Master and slaves myself included by rude pushy greedy behavior.  The final act was a Dom who had submitted before arrived late and his actions were as bad or worse then the slaves was.  If I am right or wrong I was embarrassed by my Master's actions and to be his slave.  This last arrival was ordered to fuck another slave by my Master.  This Dom started to and lost his erection, hey most of us of been there, proceeded to get sucked by the greedy over night guest and with my Master's help he shot on his face.  The look on Master's and slaves faces that I have played with were of shock as was mine.  I felt very sorry for the slave who was humiliated that a Dom would, in my mind do as he wanted and basically said your not good enough to be used.  That ended the group quickly/  I took the slave to clean up and comfort him.  I has Master's asking me what was going on and I had no answer's.  At this point I got my Master in another room and informed him of the general feelings and his answer was that neither the slave or the Dom did anything wrong.  I explained that I was passing on information from other Master's who are very good friends outside of play and asked to speak freely.  I told him basically what I have posted here and he denied it.  This morning after our guest left he admitted that he "may of made a mistake".  As of now none of his friend's who are Master's will answer an email aor return a phone call other then to cancle their invations to his next 4 groups.  I have talked to the slave of a few and thier Masters really don't know how to respond and don't want to be rash.  I am sorry it has been so lenghtly but I am having serious doubts about serving him.  He was not impaired in any way and since the other Master's are each deciding thier reaction he has told me he may have made an error and apologized to me for making an error but also said the 2 offenders would be allowed back.  Where do we all go from here?
Profile   Post #: 1
RE: Embareesed by MAster - 4/20/2009 6:41:56 PM   
slave2train4pain


Posts: 20
Joined: 2/21/2009
Status: offline 		Sorry about the spelling I was interrupted.

(in reply to slave2train4pain)
Profile   Post #: 2
RE: Embareesed by MAster - 4/20/2009 6:42:27 PM   
SirMIkeSD


Posts: 613
Joined: 3/16/2007
From: San Diego, Ca
Status: offline 		If it was an order for me to fuck a slave, I would have not done it and puled him aside or walked out (not there so the dynamics of the situation would have dictated my response) and have nothing to do with your Master until we talked about it and he apologized, to me and to those that he embarrassed me and himself in front of. If it was an offer to fuck the slave, I may have taken him up on it but I don't think so. I submit to no one but myself and my boat.

Mike

(in reply to slave2train4pain)
Profile   Post #: 3
RE: Embareesed by MAster - 4/20/2009 7:05:06 PM   
LovingMistress45


Posts: 271
Joined: 2/7/2009
Status: offline 		Ok, since you said this could just as easy have been posted on the Mistress thread I will weigh in.  I don't understand how a dominant thinks he/she would have a right to order another dominant.  All be it I do believe a person has the right to set basic rules of conduct for what is allowed in their home if hosting a play party, that is not the same as giving an order to another dominant.  I truly don't understand if he is interrupting other dominants in the middle of an "act" why they would ever desire to return.  I am with Mike and would have refused the order and most likely walked out to never return, as I would find the attempt to order me highly disrespectful.

As far as your relationship - do you want to serve someone you are ashamed of?  That decision is yours.

(in reply to SirMIkeSD)
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RE: Embareesed by MAster - 4/20/2009 7:30:22 PM   
LadySweetOrSour


Posts: 1415
Joined: 3/21/2009
Status: offline 		I don't know where the other participants go, although it sounds very much like they will not be forgiving and will not be playing again. Although if the Masters "give in" to your Master usually, they may get over it and return.

The real question is about how YOU feel. Yes, I know slaves are supposed to "do whatever they're told" etc. But primarily you are a human being, with feelings, and have the right (yes, the right) to get out of a relationship which is not what you want. I don't mean fly off into the blue at the first sign of trouble, but if you feel as deep an emotion as shame, it must be very confusing and distressing for you.

Your Master obviously knows deep down that he was in the wrong, and has admitted this to you and apologised. That's a fairly amazing thing for many Masters, so take it as a real apology, not something to make you feel better. I think you need to take a little time out to decide how you really feel. Are you embarrassed personally, or at the way your Master behaved in front of others? Is it really embarrassing for you, or embarrassing because other people saw it? I say this because if it's only embarrassing because it was in front of other people, then it's your fear of other people opinions that are making you feel bad, and not you losing faith in your Master. The first one can be dealt with, the second, not to easily.

Take some time and think it through, then make a decision. And I really hope this works out in the best for YOU.

(in reply to LovingMistress45)
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RE: Embareesed by MAster - 4/20/2009 7:54:51 PM   
DarkSteven


Posts: 28072
Joined: 5/2/2008
Status: offline 		OP, I have no idea who you are or who this so-called Master is, but in my community he would be told to get the hell out and never come back.  Ordering other Masters or their slaves is not permissible, and neither is interrupting others' scenes.




_____________________________

"You women....

The small-breasted ones want larger breasts. The large-breasted ones want smaller ones. The straight-haired ones curl their hair, and the curly-haired ones straighten theirs...

Quit fretting. We men love you."

(in reply to LadySweetOrSour)
Profile   Post #: 6
RE: Embareesed by MAster - 4/20/2009 7:58:08 PM   
slave2train4pain


Posts: 20
Joined: 2/21/2009
Status: offline 		The other Masters that submit, and this had one other time, know the rules and have decided to abide by them because he really demands little from them. Respectfully it was not an out of the blue or unexpected "request" so he knew it could happen when he accepted the invitation.  IMHO if you accept an invitation to a group and you know the rules than you should abide by them or request changes before hand.  Calling him a Dom is hard for me because of other basic social rules that you would in ANY type situation.  .

(in reply to SirMIkeSD)
Profile   Post #: 7
RE: Embareesed by MAster - 4/20/2009 8:04:12 PM   
slave2train4pain


Posts: 20
Joined: 2/21/2009
Status: offline 		Respectfully they all knew the rules and have agreed to them over a period of time.  In most cases y Master is the only one they do submit to.  In fairness some of the interruptions are not apparent and only the two doing so knows it happens.  I really don't think he does it on purpose but you never know.  Humbly if you knew the rules in advance would you go then not follow them?  As to your question "do you want to serve someone you are ashamed of?"  that is what I am figuring out..

(in reply to LovingMistress45)
Profile   Post #: 8
RE: Embareesed by MAster - 4/20/2009 8:05:21 PM   
SirMIkeSD


Posts: 613
Joined: 3/16/2007
From: San Diego, Ca
Status: offline 		In my mind and anyone please correct me if I am wrong, but if you are a "Master" that submits, you are a switch. Let me ask you this slave2train4pain is this "play" time for some of these people or do they live this life? I am in total agreement with DarkSteven as well.

Mike

(in reply to slave2train4pain)
Profile   Post #: 9
RE: Embareesed by MAster - 4/20/2009 8:06:35 PM   
slave2train4pain


Posts: 20
Joined: 2/21/2009
Status: offline 		Respectfully as I mentioned before both Masters and their slaves know the rules when they accept the invitation and he still gets a lot of people who want to  attend plus a lot of regulars.  He is not part of the local scene.

(in reply to DarkSteven)
Profile   Post #: 10
RE: Embareesed by MAster - 4/20/2009 8:08:47 PM   
LovingMistress45


Posts: 271
Joined: 2/7/2009
Status: offline 		hmmmmmm.......now it seems like you are justifying the behavior.  In my opinion no dominant has the right to order another dominant or to order subs/slaves that do not belong to him.

And if this is "acceptable" behavior/expectations then why did you need to comfort the other slave?  After all it seems he should have expected it.

(in reply to slave2train4pain)
Profile   Post #: 11
RE: Embareesed by MAster - 4/20/2009 8:18:29 PM   
LovingMistress45


Posts: 271
Joined: 2/7/2009
Status: offline 		If I knew the rules i.e. that he thinks he can order me and that I will submit, would I go and not follow them?  Frankly, no because I would have told him in very clear and colorful language exactly what I thought of him and his rules.  I am a dominant and I don't take orders from other dominants. I am not a switch (nothing wrong with being one) and I do not sub to anyone.  Now him knowing that if he still wanted to invite me, then he damn well better not try to order me or interrupt my scene, because the BITCH that I am would come out right there and then. 

< Message edited by LovingMistress45 -- 4/20/2009 8:23:50 PM >

(in reply to LovingMistress45)
Profile   Post #: 12
RE: Embareesed by MAster - 4/20/2009 8:18:55 PM   
slave2train4pain


Posts: 20
Joined: 2/21/2009
Status: offline 		Lady, thank you for your reply.  My take is many of them are torn on further play.  I am amazed at the quality of Master's that usually submit and are regulars.  I do not want to jump out of this relationship so I am trying to get others views which I as a slave don't understand.  My thoughts are if you know the rule then by accepting the invitation means you will fall them.  If you do not want you should contact the host and mention which one's you don't like.  If the host agree then you arrive if not you don't.  Is that wrong?
Luckily I had a 8 day trip planned and approve by my Master that starts tomorrow.  As for being embarrassed I first felt it for the other slave.  Secondly was because my Master acted that way in public to friends not just sex partners.  As a Master is judged for a slaves actions a slave is also judged by his Master's actions.  It is partially how people see me but the actions of my Master reflect on me and impact me.  I am appalled by his actions and it has placed me in the position of deciding to continue service or leave..


(in reply to LadySweetOrSour)
Profile   Post #: 13
RE: Embareesed by MAster - 4/20/2009 8:21:28 PM   
slave2train4pain


Posts: 20
Joined: 2/21/2009
Status: offline 		Sir, In some cases it is a lifestyle in others it is part time.  To the best of my knowledge the majority do not submit to anyone else which is why I was not useing switch.

(in reply to SirMIkeSD)
Profile   Post #: 14
RE: Embareesed by MAster - 4/20/2009 8:24:07 PM   
slave2train4pain


Posts: 20
Joined: 2/21/2009
Status: offline 		I agree 100% with you but no one there was a first time and all knew the rules.  Not just you but others could not get past that.  Basic honor IMHO is if you know the event and don't want to follow the rules don't go.

(in reply to LovingMistress45)
Profile   Post #: 15
RE: Embareesed by MAster - 4/20/2009 8:27:06 PM   
slave2train4pain


Posts: 20
Joined: 2/21/2009
Status: offline 		Humbly I did not make it clear the actions that caused the problem were not normal or agreed to.  That is the problem.  Although I have been apologized to by my Master I think other people deserve one.  Strong is a good description arrogant is no.t

(in reply to LovingMistress45)
Profile   Post #: 16
RE: Embareesed by MAster - 4/20/2009 8:32:19 PM   
SirMIkeSD


Posts: 613
Joined: 3/16/2007
From: San Diego, Ca
Status: offline 		Yes everyone there deserves an apologize, and if they agreed to submit they are switches. Does not matter if they switch all the time or not. I would not have attended as I don't submit to others.

The real question here is even if he apologizes can you get over it. This seems to have shaken you to the core and even if you can it is going to take you time to move on.

Mike

(in reply to slave2train4pain)
Profile   Post #: 17
RE: Embareesed by MAster - 4/20/2009 8:52:42 PM   
slave2train4pain


Posts: 20
Joined: 2/21/2009
Status: offline 		Sir you are correct this has shaken my faithand trust in my Master and I am not sure if I can get over it that is why I want to hear the views of strangers who are not involved.

(in reply to SirMIkeSD)
Profile   Post #: 18
RE: Embareesed by MAster - 4/20/2009 9:00:50 PM   
SirMIkeSD


Posts: 613
Joined: 3/16/2007
From: San Diego, Ca
Status: offline 		How long have you been with your Master? Are we talking a long time here and this has been the only issue or a short time less then a year and there are other things you have problems with that are not as big as this. All of these things go in your choice on what you do, with more info along these lines it's hard to give more specific advice.

Mike

(in reply to slave2train4pain)
Profile   Post #: 19
RE: Embareesed by MAster - 4/20/2009 10:02:44 PM   
slave2train4pain


Posts: 20
Joined: 2/21/2009
Status: offline 		I have been with my Master slightly over a year.  As usual things need worked out to make a good match better.  For the most part it has went well but as you stated this has shaken me to the core and I am afraid of something like this happening again.  I am not in anyway defending what he does sexually or during the groups but this is so out of normal if I stay it will take a long time to regain the trust and respect that I have /had for him...

(in reply to SirMIkeSD)
Profile   Post #: 20
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