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Just how bad is it? Q to female subs - 2/1/2006 9:17:56 AM   
RavenMuse


Posts: 4030
Joined: 1/23/2006
Status: offline 		I've introductary mails out to two young ladys at the moment and they are both pretty new to the site. I know new female members (I think female subs in particular maybe) tend to get swampped (And both these young ladys are exceptionaly stunning, of course, given I have got good taste) so I'm not expecting anything like a prompt reply (Any reply at all would be a bonus)

But thinking about it, whilst I have heard it is "bad", given I'm a Dom male (And this means I'm probably doing 'well' by getting *gosh* two approaches in my first week) I really haven't any sort of clue just how bad "BAD" actualy is?

What sort of level of 'swamped' are we talking about from your experience? 50-60? 100? 120? or am I way way off and its double or even treble that?
Profile   Post #: 1
RE: Just how bad is it? Q to female subs - 2/1/2006 9:23:36 AM   
LuckyAlbatross


Posts: 19224
Joined: 10/25/2005
Status: offline 		Brand new screen name are amazing.

I know when I switched named from EmeraldSlave2 to LuckyAlbatross I got over 200 emails in the first 24 hours. I came online and saw "New Messages" so I went to the mail section, clicked through the messages and then returned. It still said I had "New Messages." I went back and saw I had FOUR PAGES of emails. I had the exact same profile, same picture and everything as EmeraldSlave2 has, but I was suddenly on the "new" list and got inundated.

After a few days it dropped off to a normal handful. However, I can imagine if a newbie actually RESPONDED to even a chunk of the original onslaught, they'd quickly have huge handfuls of correspondences. And since they are new, they don't yet know the obvious tricks to throw into the rejection pile.

Depending on what you put in your profile and what emails you respond to you can get it down to just a few a week, or continue to get a dozen a day.

_____________________________

Find stable partners, not a stable of partners.

"Sometimes my whore logic gets all fuzzy"- Californication

(in reply to RavenMuse)
Profile   Post #: 2
RE: Just how bad is it? Q to female subs - 2/1/2006 9:30:30 AM   
RavenMuse


Posts: 4030
Joined: 1/23/2006
Status: offline 		OK if I hadn't had the feeling that I was badly underestimating the size of the problem then I'd be rather boggled.

If I don't get a responce this time I think instead of automaticaly assuming rejection it might well be worth contacting them again in a few weeks when things have quietened down a little.

Thanks LA

(in reply to LuckyAlbatross)
Profile   Post #: 3
RE: Just how bad is it? Q to female subs - 2/1/2006 9:37:00 AM   
LuckyAlbatross


Posts: 19224
Joined: 10/25/2005
Status: offline 		That makes sense- but don't just copy and paste the original message and don't get defensive or annoyed with them (amazing how many people want you to respond to them after they've told you that you suck).

_____________________________

Find stable partners, not a stable of partners.

"Sometimes my whore logic gets all fuzzy"- Californication

(in reply to RavenMuse)
Profile   Post #: 4
RE: Just how bad is it? Q to female subs - 2/1/2006 9:58:48 AM   
Mercnbeth


Posts: 11766
Status: offline
quote:

What sort of level of 'swamped' are we talking about from your experience?


this slave had a short profile at ALT, with a limit of 100 mile radius and was contacted by more mismatches than she could stand so after meeting one potential from that site, switched to a different site--not CM, but still focused on BDSM personal ads.

this slave changed the radius for potential match-ups to 200 miles, the site had a feature that would notify the users of user profiles that were viewable and available for contact if someone else shared similar interests and was what one was seeking. this slave had a short, one paragraph "profile", no picture, with a checklist of "interests" similar to the ones employed on this site ...in one week this slave received 50 responses.

this slave turned off her "profile", sifted through the 50 and picked 10 semi-finalists. after more perusing, meditation and prayer, this slave narrowed the field to 3 finalists, in order.

responding to the first one on the list resulted in an in-person meet the following week which led to deleting the profile and a solid M/s relationship coming up on it's fourth year with plans to "legalize" our partnership in July.

(in reply to RavenMuse)
Profile   Post #: 5
RE: Just how bad is it? Q to female subs - 2/1/2006 10:14:11 AM   
LessThanKate


Posts: 20
Joined: 10/20/2005
Status: offline 		"swamped" is the perfect word for it. i've been on since October, and in that time I've figured out how to write "no thank you" and make it clear in my profile that i am uninterested.

(in reply to Mercnbeth)
Profile   Post #: 6
RE: Just how bad is it? Q to female subs - 2/1/2006 10:15:49 AM   
RavenMuse


Posts: 4030
Joined: 1/23/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: LuckyAlbatross
That makes sense- but don't just copy and paste the original message and don't get defensive or annoyed with them (amazing how many people want you to respond to them after they've told you that you suck).


well given both where written before I added a picture to and changed the profile (Just waiting modding at the moment) certain things would have needed changing anyhow, because I've said them better in the new profile so wasn't going to just C&P even if the first posts are not opened.

As for getting annoyed at them for not responding... I wouldn't have been asking that question in this thread if there was any chance of that

Someone not making any effort when they are making the initial contact with me is one thing (If your not going to make any effort then why bother) but not replying to some mails when you are swamped is quite another, especialy to THAT degree! (Still a 'little' boggled)

(in reply to LuckyAlbatross)
Profile   Post #: 7
RE: Just how bad is it? Q to female subs - 2/1/2006 10:17:57 AM   
RavenMuse


Posts: 4030
Joined: 1/23/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Mercnbeth
responding to the first one on the list resulted in an in-person meet the following week which led to deleting the profile and a solid M/s relationship coming up on it's fourth year with plans to "legalize" our partnership in July.


Always nice to see success storys

(in reply to Mercnbeth)
Profile   Post #: 8
RE: Just how bad is it? Q to female subs - 2/1/2006 10:21:00 AM   
RavenMuse


Posts: 4030
Joined: 1/23/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: LessThanKate
"swamped" is the perfect word for it. i've been on since October, and in that time I've figured out how to write "no thank you" and make it clear in my profile that i am uninterested.


I would guess the first instinct for many is to write out a full reply at first and if your getting that many it would be a sheer impossibility to keep up with it all.

BTW: VERY cute picture, your Master is a lucky guy

(in reply to LessThanKate)
Profile   Post #: 9
RE: Just how bad is it? Q to female subs - 2/1/2006 11:00:53 AM   
perverseangelic


Posts: 2625
Joined: 2/2/2004
From: Davis, Ca
Status: offline 		I've had the same handle here for...what...two years? Something like that.

On a normal day I get maybe one or two messages, so, no big deal.

EVERY SINGLE TIME I edit my profile, while I'm waiting for it to get approval and there's jsut the *profile pending approval* thing I get at LEAST 2 pages of mail before it comes back up.

Don't ask me.

_____________________________

~in the begining it is always dark~

(in reply to RavenMuse)
Profile   Post #: 10
RE: Just how bad is it? Q to female subs - 2/1/2006 11:54:16 AM   
xxblushesxx


Posts: 9318
Joined: 11/3/2005
From: Kentucky
Status: offline 		If you really would like to know, you could be a 'secretary' to one of us for a week...I'm sure any girl who posts here regularly could use the help!

It usually takes me a week or so to get around to the new ones. I generally answer the ones who I know right away...and by that time, I'm done writing ...or may answer a few new ones...


(in reply to perverseangelic)
Profile   Post #: 11
RE: Just how bad is it? Q to female subs - 2/1/2006 1:02:02 PM   
Aileen68


Posts: 6091
Joined: 8/2/2005
Status: offline 		I get probably thirty to forty a day. The problem is, though, that I spend most of my time here in the boards and like to read profiles of the posters here. So I'm zipping back and forth between both sides checking on profiles which in turn shows me as being on now. I'm sure if I stayed on this side I would get much less mail.

(in reply to RavenMuse)
Profile   Post #: 12
RE: Just how bad is it? Q to female subs - 2/1/2006 1:04:45 PM   
RavenMuse


Posts: 4030
Joined: 1/23/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: xxblushesxx
If you really would like to know, you could be a 'secretary' to one of us for a week...I'm sure any girl who posts here regularly could use the help!

It usually takes me a week or so to get around to the new ones. I generally answer the ones who I know right away...and by that time, I'm done writing ...or may answer a few new ones...


I don't know about secretary, I've seen the movie, that ain't my role petal

(in reply to xxblushesxx)
Profile   Post #: 13
RE: Just how bad is it? Q to female subs - 2/1/2006 1:09:01 PM   
RavenMuse


Posts: 4030
Joined: 1/23/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Aileen68

I get probably thirty to forty a day. The problem is, though, that I spend most of my time here in the boards and like to read profiles of the posters here. So I'm zipping back and forth between both sides checking on profiles which in turn shows me as being on now. I'm sure if I stayed on this side I would get much less mail.


There was a thread in 'off topic' just a few days ago where it was mentioned how to 'hide' your online status. I don't need it because it isn't a problem for me so didn't take much notice of that bit, but if it is for you then you might want to look it up. I 'think' the thread title was something along the lines of "How did he know"

(in reply to Aileen68)
Profile   Post #: 14
RE: Just how bad is it? Q to female subs - 2/1/2006 1:35:43 PM   
justheather


Posts: 1532
Joined: 10/4/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Aileen68

I'm sure if I stayed on this side I would get much less mail.


I was under the impression that if you were on the boards it shows you as online on the other side. Is that not true?

_____________________________

I want the scissors to be sharp
And the table perfectly level
When you cut me out of my life
And paste me in that book you always carry.
-Billy Collins

(in reply to Aileen68)
Profile   Post #: 15
RE: Just how bad is it? Q to female subs - 2/1/2006 1:59:18 PM   
Aileen68


Posts: 6091
Joined: 8/2/2005
Status: offline 		I think it shows up as how many minutes since you were active on that side. Maybe a Mod can answer this one.

(in reply to justheather)
Profile   Post #: 16
RE: Just how bad is it? Q to female subs - 2/1/2006 4:02:39 PM   
TeeGO


Posts: 451
Joined: 12/11/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: xxblushesxx

If you really would like to know, you could be a 'secretary' to one of us for a week...



Funny you should mention that. I have been helping my "friend" that's searching for a Dom who joined a month ago. Withing 24 hours there were over 400 reponses. Now it's well over 600, but I've quit counting.

A couple points. In the begining, to make the list more manageable, she out and deleted many reponses that would have gotten a response had it not been so crazy. So if you have not recieved any reply, wait a week and try again. Mention you had not heard anything, but be understanding. My "friend" has had a few do this and has since responded. It's just so overwelming at first.

Also be aware that you are one in a sea of responses. So say something to stick out. And by all means play by the rules she has laid out. The time for her to follow your rules would be later, if she so chooses. So many don't get that point and are LAUNCHED unceromoniuosly.

As for me, it's been quite a learning experience on the other side.

(in reply to xxblushesxx)
Profile   Post #: 17
RE: Just how bad is it? Q to female subs - 2/1/2006 5:39:52 PM   
IrishMist


Posts: 7480
Joined: 11/17/2005
Status: offline 		There are some weeks that I have a couple pages, and then some weeks that I only have a couple emails. But then, I very rarely check my mail , and my profile would turn away any one

_____________________________

If I said something to offend you, please tell me what it was so that I can say it again later.


(in reply to RavenMuse)
Profile   Post #: 18
RE: Just how bad is it? Q to female subs - 2/1/2006 8:12:21 PM   
Schatziboo2


Posts: 2
Joined: 1/29/2006
Status: offline 		Merc and beth you are my heros! I just took a look at your profile. I can't wait to find and read more of your postings.
Schatziboo

(in reply to LessThanKate)
Profile   Post #: 19
RE: Just how bad is it? Q to female subs - 2/2/2006 5:11:21 AM   
mons


Posts: 2400
Joined: 11/16/2005
Status: offline 		i am not a submissive but a domme now swamp, swamp? i am swamp so much i do not know who the world to pick it is too much, but i love it keep writing all

mons

(in reply to LuckyAlbatross)
Profile   Post #: 20
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