Identity Crisis?

Identity Crisis? (Full Version)

All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> General BDSM Discussion

Message

knees2you -> Identity Crisis? (2/1/2006 10:26:15 AM)
Hello All.[:)] Was just wondering, I have known a person online who has had 3 different Profiles. Each one wanting something else. Would You ever send a messege to someone who has had more then one different profile? Have You ever gone thru this Yourself? I understand peoples wants and needs change, but on a routine basis? quote: "You where Chosen to speak, but do You speak what You where chosen?" Sincerely, Ant[;)]

Nuke718 -> RE: Identity Crisis? (2/1/2006 10:36:06 AM)
When I didn't want it known I was a switch, I maintained both Dom and sub profiles online. It seemed so many people were looking for one or the other and would specify "no switches". Nowaays I am more comfortable just being me and if somebody doesn't like it, we wouldnt have been compatible anyway. As for talking to a person, I would have to really dig one of their profiles. I would certainly try to get to the truth about who they really were and what they were looking for before It got more than chatty tho. N }:-

LuckyAlbatross -> RE: Identity Crisis? (2/1/2006 10:37:45 AM)
Well I have two profiles here, but they are identical and refer to eachother so I think that's a special case. In general, unless the profiles referred to eachother, no I wouldn't connect with someone who felt the need to have separate profiles. People should be free to explore as many things as they like- but the need to create "personas" for them shows that they aren't really stable and balanced with their explorations.

yourMissTress -> RE: Identity Crisis? (2/1/2006 10:41:15 AM)
Good question knees2you, thank you. IMO, it would depend on why they have a number of profiles... Let's take for instance a switch, that doesn't want to list themselves as a switch for whatever reason this person wants both a Dom/me profile and a sub profile, and they are completely upfront with me about being a switch. In this instance I can understand their desire to have 2 profiles, they are not attempting to deceive anyone, and I would have no problem conversing with them. Or if we are talking about let's say a person who has 2 or 3 profiles and both or all of them are of the same orientation (i.e. Dominant, Switch,sub, slave), but maybe the differences are age, location, or marital status. Then I would think that this person has something to hide, or is just plain full of shit, and I would thank them for being one of the easier wankers to weed out.

MissAli -> RE: Identity Crisis? (2/1/2006 10:42:46 AM)
As a professional, I have to maintain two profiles. One for business, and the other for my personal and private life. More than that, I can't imagine needing three...but if it's someone that is seeking casual play on many different fields, it is indeed a better way to cover more ground. As far as contacting some that has more than one profile: it would depend if I were wanting them to be serious, or just to play!

veronicaofML -> RE: Identity Crisis? (2/1/2006 10:48:47 AM)
each one wanting something else............. would make me start to worry. guess i'd 'a said, make up your mind and get back to me. boys are wishy washy a man makes up his mind and sticks to it so should a grown woman adult or kid,,choose!! and i give em about an hour to shit or get off the pot

BlkTallFullfig -> RE: Identity Crisis? (2/1/2006 10:55:33 AM)
quote: Would You ever send a messege to someone who has had more then one different profile? If I knew he/she had different profiles (which were different and did not mention one another), I might contact with a question, but no, generally I steer away from people who change that much, and or present a dishonest front to get attention. In my opinion that approach is about dishonesty and some desperation, but I could be wrong... M

MsMirielle -> RE: Identity Crisis? (2/1/2006 11:44:46 AM)
Some may be phonies, others genuinely confused about their sexuality, still others may enjoy switching. I often get messages from people who really dont know what they want; but need to experiment in order to find out, so I wouldnt dismiss someone merely on account of multiple profiles.

MistressFire70 -> RE: Identity Crisis? (2/1/2006 12:08:17 PM)
It might be this person working around search restrictions or what not. For example, I'm bi and list myself as such. This severaly cuts down on the number of het men and lesbian women who contact me. If I wanted more responses, I would list myself all three ways; however, I would make it clear why I was doing such and I'd pretty much post the same add in each category. Fire

truesub4u -> RE: Identity Crisis? (2/1/2006 12:18:42 PM)
On CM, I have 1 profile. On yahoo, I have 3... one for my sub life.. one for vanilla while playing on line games like chess, lit and such...and one family gets up with me at. When i am talking with someone that i somehow find out has multi accounts.. I ask why. And wait to see what they have to say. I look to see what differs with them. Because most everyone is watching their backs against people that want to screw with them in 1 shape or another. Either it be former employees.. co - workers... spouses.... family... it's just being able to do what ones wants to do depending on their moods.

FTopinMichigan -> RE: Identity Crisis? (2/1/2006 1:21:12 PM)
I have recently been contacted by a "submissive" man that stated he was 30 in his profile. That same week, I saw a profile pop up, for a "dominant" with the exact same photo, but he was now listed at 39 years old. I sent him an e-mail to explain that I understood that some men were not confident to list their sub side, but that I didn't understand the age difference. Apparently it wasn't an issue with him, because he ignored the question altogether and persisted on asking me out to dinner. Another one, which is the most amazing one I've had so far, just happened in the last two days. Male "submissive" sent an e-mail, with a photo, but didn't say a word about himself, but did mention him being bisexual (even though my profile indicated "hetero" only). I asked for "some" info, and he responded the same day, but when I went to re-read the profile, he was now listed as "dominant" and was also now "heterosexual" too. I held back in my response, but when I throught to respond, I couldn't because his profile was deleted. No account existed. The next day (this morning), I received an e-mail from a most similar name, but this time is was the same physical stats, but a FEMALE submissive. I deleted the e-mail, but minutes later, saw the profile come up, with it now listed as "male SWITCH!" Now that's a classic one. Identity crisis...INDEED! [sm=lol.gif] I just don't play those kinda games.

GoddessDustyGold -> RE: Identity Crisis? (2/1/2006 1:34:11 PM)
I have accidentally discovered that men have more than one profile on this site, as well as others. One Dom and one sub. A boy wrote to Me from his sub profile. Then he wrote again, by accident from his Dom profile. When questioned, he claimed he was really sub, but had the Dom profile up to hook up for sex. Guess he thought that would make Me smile and be forgiving. NOT. I have also had mail from another who had a Dom profile but begged to submit to Me. Didn't even say he was Dom. And, I must say, it was one of the most rude and arrogant profiles I had ever read. When I called him out on that he did not reply, but changed his profile and essay to sub, and a few weeks after that, he turned himself into a Switch. These are just a couple of examples. It happens a lot. Shrugs I also know of people who have one profile for the message boards and another for their seeking on the other side. I consider these people to be hiding. Why are you afraid to have anyone read your thoughts and opinions on the boards? Usually it is someone who is arrogant and rude on the boards, but comes across with sweetness and light on the other side. No way to connect the two personalities. Except when a mistake is made and a response is posted from the different profile. We have seen that many times! S I can understand two profiles if one is for personal and the other Professional. I can understand more than one profile on places like yahoo, aol or msn, since we don't necessarily out ourselves in all facets of our lives. But this is an alternative site, and we are already out here. So My best guess is that these are not mostly people who are confused about their sexuality. These are people who like to play games and get what they can, where the can, however they can. I think this happens much, much more than many of us realize. I have one profile.

knees2you -> RE: Identity Crisis? (2/1/2006 4:27:39 PM)
quote: I have accidentally discovered that men have more than one profile on this site, as well as others. One Dom and one sub. A boy wrote to Me from his sub profile. Then he wrote again, by accident from his Dom profile. When questioned, he claimed he was really sub, but had the Dom profile up to hook up for sex. Guess he thought that would make Me smile and be forgiving. NOT. I have also had mail from another who had a Dom profile but begged to submit to Me. Didn't even say he was Dom. And, I must say, it was one of the most rude and arrogant profiles I had ever read. When I called him out on that he did not reply, but changed his profile and essay to sub, and a few weeks after that, he turned himself into a Switch. These are just a couple of examples. It happens a lot. Shrugs I also know of people who have one profile for the message boards and another for their seeking on the other side. I consider these people to be hiding. Why are you afraid to have anyone read your thoughts and opinions on the boards? Usually it is someone who is arrogant and rude on the boards, but comes across with sweetness and light on the other side. No way to connect the two personalities. Except when a mistake is made and a response is posted from the different profile. We have seen that many times! S I can understand two profiles if one is for personal and the other Professional. I can understand more than one profile on places like yahoo, aol or msn, since we don't necessarily out ourselves in all facets of our lives. But this is an alternative site, and we are already out here. So My best guess is that these are not mostly people who are confused about their sexuality. These are people who like to play games and get what they can, where the can, however they can. I think this happens much, much more than many of us realize. I have one profile. GoddessDustyGold You are right GoddessDustyGold[:D] To bad these people do not realize that they will be old and grey before they realize what FOOLS they have been.[8\|] Sincerely, Ant[;)]

Sensualips -> RE: Identity Crisis? (2/1/2006 4:39:17 PM)
Oh, I can think of a lot of legitimate reasons to have a few profiles. Let's see. 1) The dog ate the password to the first profile, and it can't be reset because s/he changed emails since then. 2) You need a second profile to email your new partner and ask if they are seeing anyone and how serious they are about this person. 3) You need a third profile to email your ex and ask if they are seeing anyone, how serious is it, and why did they split with their last partner. 4) Have you ever seen 50 First Dates? Enough said. 5) You have alienated the vast majority of regular message board posters and need a fresh start, so you can annoy them in a whole new way. 6) The government. They are watching, you know. 7) One profile your partner has access to, and one they do not. Just so you can privately plan a super special surprise for your upcoming anniversary, of course. 8) Your Dom made you do it. 9) A sociological experiment on the response rate of a hot profile pic vs. no profile pic. 10) You need that many personalities to keep up with the post rate of Lucky Albatross.

wetsub000 -> RE: Identity Crisis? (2/1/2006 11:44:33 PM)
I love it! I think you've struck on a new party game - how many reasons can you find. As for multi-profiles I've occasionally even had people ask me, how many profiles do you have? or what are your other profile names? I think it's really common to have more than one. I've had multiples on other sites, for some of the reasons suggested (and other reasons too!), but only one so far on CM.

Saraheli -> RE: Identity Crisis? (2/2/2006 12:16:32 AM)
I have 1. I figure there is only one of me, so no need for more profiles...however when my evil twin finally breaks free of the cage in the basment........

IronBear -> RE: Identity Crisis? (2/2/2006 12:21:43 AM)
I have three profiles on line. The first is the one here and is echoed to two other sites. The second is my Pagan profile which makes no reference to the Gorean lifestyle and associated BDSM areas. The final profile is a professional one which is reflected on several professional sites and will be the basis of a new personal website when I buy a domain. Each is unique reflecting my interesrs and activities in three different areas of my life. Those who are permitted to get close enoiugh to me become familiar with other areas of my life.

UtopianRanger -> RE: Identity Crisis? (2/2/2006 1:00:08 AM)
quote: Would You ever send a messege to someone who has had more then one different profile? Oh... I sure would [;)] I love it when someone tries to fool all by writing under a different pseudonym after having read many hundreds of their original posts. Surely they do not think we're all bunch of dummies?[8\|] - The Ranger

FTopinMichigan -> RE: Identity Crisis? (2/2/2006 2:45:02 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: GoddessDustyGold I also know of people who have one profile for the message boards and another for their seeking on the other side. I consider these people to be hiding. Why are you afraid to have anyone read your thoughts and opinions on the boards? Usually it is someone who is arrogant and rude on the boards, but comes across with sweetness and light on the other side. No way to connect the two personalities. Oh, I'm arrogant and rude ALL the time! [sm=lol.gif] I have learned, from several unpleasant experiences, that it is not always the best way to be open with ALL of your thoughts on certain topics. I have had several men take my posted words, and then work to manipulate me based on what they read. Such as the case of a man that knew I would not entertain the idea of even meeting him, as I feel that it would not be good for either of us, since our interests were not matched in any way. I would never accept a mate that had his interest, as it's a hard limit for me. He would read my thoughts on the topic, in the message forum, and worked his responses around what I had written, without me suspecting a thing. After meeting and getting to know one another (of course with him having a tremendous heads up, on supposedly knowing me through my postings), his interest was later divulged, and not in a good way. He felt that if I got to know him..."I would change my mind." Ever hear that one ladies? This has happened to me several times. Sometimes an opinionated person's posts can be used in a way that is not conducive to building a relationship, as evidenced in the example above, and it's not to "hide" as much as a desire to get to know each other on equal ground. My "other" profile has my face shot photo, so I'm not hiding there at all. It is there for the reasons sited. Anyone that knows me in real life, and in the community, will know me by this name. I cannot tell you the men (and women) that said they knew me, when we met for the very first time, because they read a few posts in a message forum. I found that a little scary, especially since primarily those were people that never posted, and were lurkers. Just by the term alone...a lurker sounds scary, doesn't it? K

MsSonnetMarwood -> RE: Identity Crisis? (2/2/2006 5:54:47 AM)
quote: Would You ever send a messege to someone who has had more then one different profile? I actually ran into that recently on here. A sub had contacted me under one name (I bounced him because of something he said to me I found totally unacceptable), and also had another name with the same basic information but seeking a much more extreme fetish fullfillment list. He didn't tell me about the second name, but would always log off one then sign on the other one. Not too swift LOL I think this is a little different than other people's references to having multiple email. I have AOL and make use of being able to have up to 7 names/emails on there. It's a must as I chose to have a kink-related profile. I have to have one for family, one for school, and another that I filter most of my Yahoo and other groups to. I see that as "email management" as opposed to being dishonest.

Page: [1] 2 next > >>

Collarchat.com © 2025

Terms of Service

0.046875