Bad subs and the damage they do... (Full Version)

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sweetsub0 -> Bad subs and the damage they do... (8/18/2004 12:44:43 AM)

Turn about is always fairplay. Laura suggested this thread on bad Doms and she is right. Someone ought to start this one. Apparently she forgot she was someone at the time, so this girl will try to do it justice. Hopefuly more justice then she did her own...(caugh, caugh)

This girl once knew a Dom by the name of, Midas. He was a wonderful Dom and considered ALL the sub/slaves in His vacinity to be under His protection. He was very sweet and we would all go running to Him boo hooing about our Tops not paying enough attention to us or eyeing some other subbie in a cheerleader outfit and He would, respectively either pet us and tell us we were being silly and that of course our Doms loved us, or, swat our butts and tell us exactly how we were screwing up and send us packing back to our Tops with much wiser bottoms. He did this with the utmost loyalty and honor to His Sisters and Brothers and was generally respected and trusted in the club by A/all.

Now it came to pass at a play party, this one was "in the corner" for swatting a Domme with a pillow. This one was whispering to Midas so that her Dom would not hear and she asked Him why He did not have a sub of His own. That as far as she knew any of the uncollared would love Him and even a few of the collared ones too. He whispered back that 'He decided not to choose at all since we all came to Him anyway He had plenty of subbie flesh in His way as it was, He had time to find the perfect sub just for Him, and wasn't i supposed to be in the corner and to mind my own beeswax.'

So it became a game for this girl each time she saw Midas to ask Him if His perfect girl had arrived yet or no. He would chide her and rebuke her and tell her to quit, but it was always with a twinkle in His eye and a grin. One day at a munch this girl saw Him and was about to ask her question when Midas charged up to her full of sunlight and happiness and announced that this girl could rest because He had found the perfect girl. The girl's name was jennifer and no, i did not know her, she was new to our group and was beautiful and talented and He just had to have her, would i help? Now it was a rule in our group that a Dom or Domme had to be introduced formally to a sub/slave as in the old southern days. This was often let by, but Midas believed in it especally between Male and female. So of course i would help and made the effort to meet with the girl and introduced Midas well.

He wined her and dined her and for months played the cool Cat and would let none of us near Him for worry she would think He was playing a field. This girl missed Him durring that time, but understood as most of us did that while He still adored us He needed space to play His hand.

For almost a year they stayed together but while she accepted His collar she would not become His 24/7. One day at a breakfast munch He stood up and in front of A/all asked her to marry Him and she agreed. E/everyone was thrilled, but none more then me because Midas gave me the honor of planning the wedding and helping His beloved jennifer move to Texas.

The last time this girl saw that one she was driving away back to Arkansas to close her house with an $8000.00 check from Midas to cover closing out her personal business.

The bitch moved alright i have never been able to find her since!

For almost 2 years Midas would see no one from the club but me and Mine. It was not till this girl went into a screaming fit calling Him, PUFF THE MAGIC DRAGON that He regained at least some of His old spark. But as far as this girl knows He has never offered His collar to another, nor was He ever the same.

boys and girls be careful of your Top's heart, sometimes it does not seem so, but it is just as breakable as yours...


[image]local://upfiles/42532/3C464B0E701D4D74AFD92699C43E1898.jpg[/image]




proudsub -> RE: Bad subs and the damage they do... (8/18/2004 1:07:41 PM)

What a sad story, thanks for sharing it sweetsub.




Estring -> RE: Bad subs and the damage they do... (8/18/2004 2:58:03 PM)

That is quite an unfortunate story sweet. I am not sure I understand the point though. That subs can be bad too? I think we know that. I think just about every Dom/me can tell a story of having their heart broken in the past. I know that I can.
That this Dom never collared again or was never the same says something about him. Nobody is worth that much, and nobody is too much to get over.




Sinergy -> RE: Bad subs and the damage they do... (8/18/2004 8:12:37 PM)

quote:

That this Dom never collared again or was never the same says something about him. Nobody is worth that much, and nobody is too much to get over.


While this seems completely true on the surface, as was so intelligently opined by the one with the capacity for abstract thought in "Oh Brother Where Art Thou,"

"Nobody can look for logic in the chambers of the human heart."

The problem with relationships, for me, is that the vacuum left in my soul from that person I considered a part of my worldview no longer being a part of it never really goes away for me.

I know cognitively why the relationship had to end. But the emotions are much deeper and surface at inopportune times. Which is not to say I would go backwards (at least I have never met somebody I wanted try to hook up with after the formal breakup; once it is over I am pretty much gone...) but I find myself at times in a state of sorrow over what was once a part of my life.

I would love to have a collared relationship with a submissive again, despite the two which I had being such dismal failures.

JM, CBW, BTYG

Sinergy




pixieunleashed -> RE: Bad subs and the damage they do... (8/20/2004 7:46:10 PM)

While it is all fine and fun to be all enlightened and knowing why relationships end, etc. It does not help to deal with the pain emotion, as emotions are irrational, and do whatever they want to inside your heart anyway.

There are bad subs and bad Doms everywhere, as firstly every sub or Dom is HUMAN. Being human makes us prone to flaws. Were we perfect, we would not be in this flesh.

The damage someone does or does not do, is all in how the person that was mistreated decides to feel about them.

It seems to me that Midas was happy being single and not having a collared sub, then when he found one, she bailed. Granted this had to have been a humilating situation for him, but seeing as how he was happy being Dom-for-all once, perhaps he will decide to pick up that situation again. The fact that he has not offered his collar to anyone else for this period of time, says to me that at least he is not going to be one of those velcro collar Doms trying to get SOMEBODY?ANYBODY to be his. He is being choosy as he has the right to be, and it isn't anybody's buisness why he has not again found this "one".

thank you for reading this, have a great day,

pixie




theroebabe -> RE: Bad subs and the damage they do... (8/21/2004 5:55:40 AM)

Well sweetsub0,

Yes that is a damn shame that he had to experience this type of betrayal. It shows there are preditors in every walk of life and that some people need to learn to live with honor for themselves.

I hope he heals well and is able to move past this and back into the light.

Roe




MistressT01 -> RE: Bad subs and the damage they do... (3/29/2009 2:25:36 PM)

WOW that story just really hit home! Damn subs that are players anyways. I can definately identify with Midas.




StormsSlave -> RE: Bad subs and the damage they do... (3/29/2009 2:35:39 PM)

OK.  So, the tit for tat has been established.  I hate to break the BDSM fantasy bubble here, but isn't it possible that PEOPLE can be bad, dom or sub aside?  I've known people in perfectly vanilla relationships have exactly these kinds of experiences on in either gender, gay or straight, etc etc etc.  There's nothing about this that is dom or sub, mereley weak, unkind, and opportunist PEOPLE being PEOPLE.




WyldHrt -> RE: Bad subs and the damage they do... (3/29/2009 2:38:26 PM)

The "tit" and "tat" in this case is 5 years old. Pretty sure Midas has gotten past it by now. 




aravain -> RE: Bad subs and the damage they do... (3/29/2009 2:58:44 PM)

~FR~

um...

that's what we call a 'bad person.'

The fact that she was a submissive, or that the affected party was a dominant, has no real bearing on the fact the situation, except that she used it to con him. *shrug*

At least it wasn't suggesting that certain activities or whatever will make a 'bad sub'




DesFIP -> RE: Bad subs and the damage they do... (3/29/2009 3:54:26 PM)

Not to mention that users don't normally stay with someone for a year first. Con artists hit and run. So I have to wonder, being the cynical somebody I am, what her side of the story was.




aravain -> RE: Bad subs and the damage they do... (3/29/2009 5:54:06 PM)

Good question.

I was assuming he was probably caring for her... it would be interesting to know for sure!




StormsSlave -> RE: Bad subs and the damage they do... (3/29/2009 6:13:42 PM)

Des--gasp! How dare you suggest that a victim might have some culpability in their decision making.  What is wrong with you!?  [;)]




LaTigresse -> RE: Bad subs and the damage they do... (3/29/2009 7:37:42 PM)

Hell, 2004...........they might be dead by now![:D]




MsDDom -> RE: Bad subs and the damage they do... (3/29/2009 9:55:39 PM)

quote:

but isn't it possible that PEOPLE can be bad, dom or sub aside?


always...




DesFIP -> RE: Bad subs and the damage they do... (3/30/2009 3:53:22 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: StormsSlave

Des--gasp! How dare you suggest that a victim might have some culpability in their decision making.  What is wrong with you!?  [;)]


Yup, I'm a bad subbie! [:D]




InTonguesslave -> RE: Bad subs and the damage they do... (3/30/2009 4:14:04 AM)

the thing that popped into my mind is the whole 'waiting for the One' thing and then when 'the One' turns out not to be it and youve invested all of that time and hope into finding them - its going to take a long time to recover and find anotherOne.

or am i being cynical.




Aynne88 -> RE: Bad subs and the damage they do... (3/30/2009 8:00:56 AM)

5 year old thread people, it has been pointed out. Who cares?  Mistress T01, you probably didn't know this, but when replying to a thread, check the date before you reserruct one half a decade old. It is an easy mistake when new to the forums. Even people here longer apparently still even reply.[8|] 




exile509 -> RE: Bad subs and the damage they do... (3/31/2009 2:18:16 AM)

very breakable, my puppy left scars on my heart




CelticPrince -> RE: Bad subs and the damage they do... (3/31/2009 3:13:32 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: sweetsub0

Turn about is always fairplay. Laura suggested this thread on bad Doms and she is right. Someone ought to start this one. Apparently she forgot she was someone at the time, so this girl will try to do it justice. Hopefuly more justice then she did her own...(caugh, caugh)

This girl once knew a Dom by the name of, Midas. He was a wonderful Dom and considered ALL the sub/slaves in His vacinity to be under His protection. He was very sweet and we would all go running to Him boo hooing about our Tops not paying enough attention to us or eyeing some other subbie in a cheerleader outfit and He would, respectively either pet us and tell us we were being silly and that of course our Doms loved us, or, swat our butts and tell us exactly how we were screwing up and send us packing back to our Tops with much wiser bottoms. He did this with the utmost loyalty and honor to His Sisters and Brothers and was generally respected and trusted in the club by A/all.

Now it came to pass at a play party, this one was "in the corner" for swatting a Domme with a pillow. This one was whispering to Midas so that her Dom would not hear and she asked Him why He did not have a sub of His own. That as far as she knew any of the uncollared would love Him and even a few of the collared ones too. He whispered back that 'He decided not to choose at all since we all came to Him anyway He had plenty of subbie flesh in His way as it was, He had time to find the perfect sub just for Him, and wasn't i supposed to be in the corner and to mind my own beeswax.'

So it became a game for this girl each time she saw Midas to ask Him if His perfect girl had arrived yet or no. He would chide her and rebuke her and tell her to quit, but it was always with a twinkle in His eye and a grin. One day at a munch this girl saw Him and was about to ask her question when Midas charged up to her full of sunlight and happiness and announced that this girl could rest because He had found the perfect girl. The girl's name was jennifer and no, i did not know her, she was new to our group and was beautiful and talented and He just had to have her, would i help? Now it was a rule in our group that a Dom or Domme had to be introduced formally to a sub/slave as in the old southern days. This was often let by, but Midas believed in it especally between Male and female. So of course i would help and made the effort to meet with the girl and introduced Midas well.

He wined her and dined her and for months played the cool Cat and would let none of us near Him for worry she would think He was playing a field. This girl missed Him durring that time, but understood as most of us did that while He still adored us He needed space to play His hand.

For almost a year they stayed together but while she accepted His collar she would not become His 24/7. One day at a breakfast munch He stood up and in front of A/all asked her to marry Him and she agreed. E/everyone was thrilled, but none more then me because Midas gave me the honor of planning the wedding and helping His beloved jennifer move to Texas.

The last time this girl saw that one she was driving away back to Arkansas to close her house with an $8000.00 check from Midas to cover closing out her personal business.

The bitch moved alright i have never been able to find her since!

For almost 2 years Midas would see no one from the club but me and Mine. It was not till this girl went into a screaming fit calling Him, PUFF THE MAGIC DRAGON that He regained at least some of His old spark. But as far as this girl knows He has never offered His collar to another, nor was He ever the same.

boys and girls be careful of your Top's heart, sometimes it does not seem so, but it is just as breakable as yours...


[image]local://upfiles/42532/3C464B0E701D4D74AFD92699C43E1898.jpg[/image]


sweetsub,

A story that hit home for me about 20 years ago; it does happen

CP




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