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First Urges - 2/3/2006 8:42:12 PM

SwedishPhoenix

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Think carefully, honestly, and openly, and try to put your finger on your first urges of domination/control? Was it overtly positive or negative? Was it a reaction to something/someone specific, or the final blossoming of a long-growing urge? Was it sexual? Do you remember how you felt about it?

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RE: First Urges - 2/3/2006 9:08:27 PM

perverseangelic

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It was overtly sexual, and I was very young.

It was in response to books about forced slavery in the american south and the inquisition/salem witch trials.

I responed most strongly to scenes of torture and pain. I didn't understand my body's sexual response, adn was very confused by it.

For a while, I thought I'd hurt myself because my body reacted in ways I'd never experienced before. Also, I used to inflict sexualized pain on myself, and it became a seriuos worry that I'd caused some kind of damage. I didn't understand how my body worked well enough to know what was going on.

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RE: First Urges - 2/3/2006 11:06:43 PM

LuckyAlbatross

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I remember having many kidnapping fantasies when I was 5. They were very exciting and yummy for me. I remember tying myself up and imagining being tied up by others around that time as well. When I start masturbating I just KNEW it would be better if I was tied up. I have no idea why.

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RE: First Urges - 2/3/2006 11:20:55 PM

SadistDaddy

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I was 5-6 years old. Our neighbor was a preacher and his teenage son wrestled a woman to the ground in front of me.
She struggled and he pinned her arms down while straddling her. They were only playing, but it was intense.
I just remember thinking it was the most awesome thing I had ever seen and knew that I wanted to do the same.
When I think back, I remember an odd physical sensation like arousal.
I'm not sure that can happen at that age, if anyone knows otherwise let me know.
It was the first time I ever felt my "inner beast." An animalistic urge. I remember that moment vividly to this day.
Another five years passed and I would assemble harems on the playground, but that's another story.

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RE: First Urges - 2/4/2006 4:28:14 AM

FantMstr

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Hmmmm ... earliest I can remember (it was a LONG time ago -late 1950's) - I was attracted to the "story" type magazines. They were also what I could afford at that stage of my childhood and family economy. Then playing tie up games with my girlfriends.

Fantasy Mstr

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RE: First Urges - 2/4/2006 5:21:40 AM

IronBear

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Mine are a tad hazzey, but the first controlong urge I can remember was to cotrol my bladder after a huge drink of milk untill I could fine a bush to have a leak behind on a school outing.

Dominance wise it is impossible to pin down. I seem to rememer attempting (unwisel) to dom my Mother and my Grandmother.. A painfull experience but I had both those ladies in my ear for as long as I can remember enforcing the I was born to rule and my Father's comment "First you learn to comand before you can rule."

< Message edited by IronBear -- 2/4/2006 5:22:13 AM >

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RE: First Urges - 2/4/2006 8:16:10 AM

ArtfulTrainer

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I was interested in exploring my own pain limits as early as age six or seven. About age 7 when I was alone in the bathroom I would hold my erect penis against hot radiator to see how long I could tolerate it. When I was twelve I pierced my nipple with a sewing needle. These activities were very exciting and would occupy my thoughts for days.

In college I explored dominance and submission with a girlfriend (we would flip a coin to see who got tied up). We played with a variety of whips and clamps and other toys. I gradually came to prefer the dominant side more than submission.

I usually like to experience for myself what I plan to inflict on a sub, but when I am in the submissive role it seems more clinical--I feel like I am trying it out and analyzing it so I can do it to someone else. It is sexually arousing, but to a much lesser degree than when I am Topping.

When someone will accept something painful in order to please me, I get aroused. Knowing that they get pleasure from it is hot, especially when, in the middle of a torment, they beg to be fucked or beg to cum. One of the most exciting times for me is during negotiation when the sub tells me "I don't really like this or that, but I will do it if it pleases you. I love giving commands and seeing the sub do their best to comply.

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RE: First Urges - 2/4/2006 9:42:13 AM

fastlane

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It was the first time I grabbed my cock and thought..."this Mother fucker is mine!"

Dayum, I played with it all day long and continue to this day....LOL

I need someone else to play with it now though, my hands are tired!

Peace, Kevin

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RE: First Urges - 2/4/2006 10:35:57 AM

Cloudz

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I was young, 9 or 10. Used to play Queen of the castle and servant. Even then I got a sexual charge from control. It was GOOD to be queen!

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RE: First Urges - 2/5/2006 4:37:56 PM

mons

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i felt my urges was long time coming they were with me for most of my life as a young child even then i felt something was different, as teen i made myself let them go as a adult i felt them so strong i had to find a way to know what and why i had these feeling. when i first had my dominant experince i felt a release so strong i knew this was it .i now feel more open and strong inside and out. it is a veyr emotionally open feeling. must of my family knows and expect me, yes this is something many family member frown on lol i am happy now more so then i ever been in my life

with greetings

mons

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RE: First Urges - 2/6/2006 4:49:39 AM

MistressAlexaS

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When I was younger I used to be a tomboy and I liked to kidnap the boys and tie them up with my jumprope. It was so much fun to watch them squirm! Then it progressed to playing school and making them stand in the corner or giving them a *spanking* for being naughty. I just knew as a girl that I could overpower these boys simply by batting my eyelashes and wrestling them to the floor. Oh the power of the pussy! LOL

My first sexual experience with this was at the age of 19 when I got this overpowering urge to tie my boyfriend up with my pantyhose. I did and it was absolutely exhilerating! I loved it and haven't looked back since.

~Alexa

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RE: First Urges - 2/6/2006 5:25:52 AM

RavenMuse

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I hadn't really thought when the first overt sign of it was but thinking back there is one instance that does stand out.

I would have been around four years old and like most young boys most of that age games where rather rough and tumble. Except with one girl living nearby who was slightly older than I who I played with on occassion.

She had one of those little plastic tea services and one 'game' in particular involved us developing a elaborate ritual of her serving me to my direction. When she got something wrong I would make her start again from the very beginning.

Makes me wonder if she ever ended up on a site like this looking for a Dom

Not that I can remember her name or could even begin to guess what she would look like now after over 35 years.

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RE: First Urges - 2/6/2006 2:54:28 PM

Oberonrex

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I was six or seven, and enthralled with Houdini. Some older female cousins tied me up, quite cheerfully, and I used my knowledge to escape. I was very put out that they would not let me tie them up, and perhaps spank or do such to them, after all, fair was fair... They, in turn, were shocked that I could get out of hand, leg, and hog-ties so quickly and easily, and perhaps a bit concerned about what I would do to them in terms of spanking (bare bottom for them was in my mind) and exploration. Other than put out that they would not play fair, I do remember the excitement at the thought of tying them up and what might get done. There were definite sexual overtones, but I really had no clue. Then again, that was one reason I wanted to spank and explore... After all, I wanted to see what was so different, check out their bums, and learn. It is the first thing I remember fairly clearly that started me to reading and learning about bondage and the rest. I still like exploring and investigating the female bum...

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