What is Worse? Not having a Slave/Sub. Or having one who is Disobiedent?

What is Worse? Not having a Slave/Sub. Or having one who is Disobiedent? (Full Version)

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knees2you -> What is Worse? Not having a Slave/Sub. Or having one who is Disobiedent? (2/3/2006 10:59:47 PM)
Mistresses, Just wondering what would be worse for You? Not have a Submissive/Slave, or having one who gets into Trouble alot? quote: "You have been chosen to speak, but will You speak what You have chosen?" Sincerely, Ant[;)]

LuckyAlbatross -> RE: What is Worse? Not having a Slave/Sub. Or having one who is Disobiedent? (2/3/2006 11:09:41 PM)
Being single is far better than being in an unhealthy relationship.

brightspot -> RE: What is Worse? Not having a Slave/Sub. Or having one who is Disobiedent? (2/3/2006 11:13:06 PM)
Ummm..I am not a Domina, but I certainly would not want to be Disobiedent, sounds scary![:D] *Brightspot

RavenMuse -> RE: What is Worse? Not having a Slave/Sub. Or having one who is Disobiedent? (2/4/2006 2:46:15 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: LuckyAlbatross Being single is far better than being in an unhealthy relationship. That IS the bottom line! Depends what the OP ment as disobedient though. If she ment someone who was a bit cheeky, pushed at the bounderys a bit or made mistakes but was trying to make the relationship work then it would be diffrent. But there is a line past which the relationship isn't a healthy one, that line will be in diffrent places for diffrent relationships but once crossed then both people are better off out of the situation.

MsSonnetMarwood -> RE: What is Worse? Not having a Slave/Sub. Or having one who is Disobiedent? (2/4/2006 4:45:37 AM)
quote: Mistresses, Just wondering what would be worse for You? Not have a Submissive/Slave, or having one who gets into Trouble alot? If a sub is getting into trouble a lot, in general, it's usually a combination of the sub's heart not being into this and the Dominant not providing adequate training/structure. Either way, clearly, it's not working well. For myself, I'd much rather be single than be in a relationship that was more strife ridden than necessary.

TexasMaam -> RE: What is Worse? Not having a Slave/Sub. Or having one who is Disobiedent? (2/4/2006 11:09:19 AM)
Interesting question. I'd rather be without a sub than have one I had to contstantly correct. If I'm going to bother spending time on a man, he'd better be motivated to please Me, not aggravate Me. Now, a playful brat who pulls pranks to get paddled or whipped is another matter altogether. I can play out a good prank as well as anyone, as long as I'm not ultimately being manipulated into flogging, caning, punishing to meet HIS needs, on HIS schedule, serving HIS agenda ALL of the time. It's an intriguiging balancing act. That type of 'play' is only worth the trouble if and when I'm ultimately the one who's satisfied with it. When it gets on My nerves, color him gone. TM

yourMissTress -> RE: What is Worse? Not having a Slave/Sub. Or having one who is Disobiedent? (2/4/2006 11:11:28 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: knees2you Mistresses, Just wondering what would be worse for You? Not have a Submissive/Slave, or having one who gets into Trouble alot? quote: "You have been chosen to speak, but will You speak what You have chosen?" Sincerely, Ant[;)] I already have an unmentionable, thank you very much!

ShadeDiva -> RE: What is Worse? Not having a Slave/Sub. Or having one who is Disobiedent? (2/4/2006 11:16:28 AM)
I don't have a submissive, and I suspect that I won;t for some time. I'm picky. And my situation means pretty much that the majority of them won't be interested or wouldn't fit. And I'm okay with that. Personally I'd rather wait for the RIGHT person then get distracted and weighed down by those that I know are NOT right for me - I mean what's the point in barking up a tree that you KNOW is the wrong one? Just seems like a waste of time and energy to me I guess.

thetammyjo -> RE: What is Worse? Not having a Slave/Sub. Or having one who is Disobiedent? (2/4/2006 2:40:04 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: RavenMuse quote: ORIGINAL: LuckyAlbatross Being single is far better than being in an unhealthy relationship. That IS the bottom line! Depends what the OP ment as disobedient though. If she ment someone who was a bit cheeky, pushed at the bounderys a bit or made mistakes but was trying to make the relationship work then it would be diffrent. But there is a line past which the relationship isn't a healthy one, that line will be in diffrent places for diffrent relationships but once crossed then both people are better off out of the situation. I agree. The line between healthy and unhealthy can only be decided by the people involved (unless things are out of hand and abuse is happening but still I think it has to truly be the decision of at least one of those people that its unhealthy otherwise they'll just get back together). For me, when time with that disobedient person becomes tiring or is something I can't look forward to, then it is a signal it has become unhealthy. Also if I'm spending more time thinking of how to get obedience than enjoying myself, it is unhealthy for me.

HayaSierra -> RE: What is Worse? Not having a Slave/Sub. Or having one who is Disobiedent? (2/4/2006 3:40:31 PM)
Greetings, I would say, having a disobedient one is worse, not because I cannot tame the individual, but because that would make me question his or her consensuality in the issue. If it is merely a case of someone acting up though -- and they are quite visibly there consensually, this CAN and DOES get fixed if they are worth the effort and I'm really intent on having and holding on to that one. But overall, in that case I start considering dropping them because there are more effective things I can spend that time on, including training another and much better behaved slave. As for disobedience, in face to face such can be fixed in a very short time, online and long distance it takes a little more effort.

Evanesce -> RE: What is Worse? Not having a Slave/Sub. Or having one who is Disobiedent? (2/4/2006 10:02:50 PM)
quote: Just wondering what would be worse for You? Not have a Submissive/Slave, or having one who gets into Trouble alot? I prefer my life to be as stress-free as possible, and having a slave whom I would have to be constantly on top of in order to get what I want from him/her is not my idea of stress relief. I'd rather be alone.

UtahGoddess -> RE: What is Worse? Not having a Slave/Sub. Or having one who is Disobiedent? (2/4/2006 11:53:33 PM)
No submissive vs disobedient troublesome submissive are the same thing in my book. Ms Sandi

mantis65 -> RE: What is Worse? Not having a Slave/Sub. Or having one who is Disobiedent? (2/5/2006 12:29:54 PM)
quote: Being single is far better than being in an unhealthy relationship. This is like the most important thing I have ever learned in life. Not just in a BDSM relationship any relationship! This may sound bitter to people that still believe in “soul mates” and have romantic notions. Yet it’s very true. The wrong person can cause you all sorts of grief.

mantis65 -> RE: What is Worse? Not having a Slave/Sub. Or having one who is Disobiedent? (2/5/2006 12:39:32 PM)
quote: The line between healthy and unhealthy can only be decided by the people involved (unless things are out of hand and abuse is happening but still I think it has to truly be the decision of at least one of those people that its unhealthy otherwise they'll just get back together). In my case it was drugs and she was “only hurting her self” but of course if you have been in a situation with someone like that you learn they are abusing other people. Number one trust goes out the window. And the relationship is dead after that even if you try to pretend and hope things go back to normal. I do believe people can change but sometimes it’s better to move on. As far as willful disobedience isn’t that a breach of trust? I am mean a mistake is one thing but a pattern of it is something to look out for. Damn I have developed trust issues I guess just ignore me if I sound wrong to you.

strob -> RE: What is Worse? Not having a Slave/Sub. Or having one who is Disobiedent? (2/6/2006 9:37:13 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: knees2you Mistresses, Just wondering what would be worse for You? Not have a Submissive/Slave, or having one who gets into Trouble alot? quote: "You have been chosen to speak, but will You speak what You have chosen?" Sincerely, Ant[;)] What means getting into trouble? What means disobedient? A domme on this community told me once "I just love when they get disobedient, it gives me more space to do what I might not do with a totally obedient ones".

thetammyjo -> RE: What is Worse? Not having a Slave/Sub. Or having one who is Disobiedent? (2/6/2006 10:10:34 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: strob What means getting into trouble? What means disobedient? A domme on this community told me once "I just love when they get disobedient, it gives me more space to do what I might not do with a totally obedient ones". That's going to vary by person and relationship I bet to a degree. Since I am very careful to make my expectations clear about how I want things done, "trouble" and "disobedience" would be more an attitude issue than a physical issue. Life can cause us problems, that's the way it is, so its reasonable to assume that at some point I might say "do this" and my slave would roll his eyes but do it anyway -- that gets a "stop; what's going on" from me because that isn't normal behavior or expected behavior. A person who was in "trouble" or disobedient" as in the OP in my world would be someone who is always rolling his eyes or sighing dramatically when doing something. If that continued beyond the initial discussion of 'what's wrong' -- depending on the length of the relationship -- the person would be dismissed or we'd have to do some serious reflecting and working on things.

veronicaofML -> RE: What is Worse? Not having a Slave/Sub. Or having one who is Disobiedent? (2/6/2006 10:31:47 AM)
I already have an unmentionable, thank you very much! yourMissTress =================== still the best answer as i see it. i had 3 wives as bad a damned little kid. just overgrown kids themselves. seems in MY mind..if i was a male dom...i damned sure wouldnt put up with any crap. there is no viable reason on erath why any D should have-to put up with any s...that is contstantly in trouble..it becomes all about them...the s...not about the D...where it should be.

Troubleinparadis -> RE: What is Worse? Not having a Slave/Sub. Or having one who is Disobiedent? (2/8/2006 11:45:08 AM)
Hands down, its better to have no slave than it is to have a "slave" who does not want to submit to your wishes/desires. you can read my post in ask a master (slave/wife nilla) for an glimpse at what an unsubmissive slave can do with a realtionship.....add in a little bit of liar, and a tad of confusion, and a ton of manipulation and well hell yeah, quote: Being single is far better than being in an unhealthy relationship.

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