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AAkasha -> RE: High heels (2/6/2006 2:00:24 PM)
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quote:
ORIGINAL: thetammyjo
quote:
ORIGINAL: veronicaofML
I agree with Tammyjo here. I wear high heels, skirts, makeup, spend lots of time on my hair, and wear very feminine perfume. None of these things make me anymore feminine or ladylike than a woman that wears jeans and t-shirt with her hair in a pony tail and no make up. In my mind femininity is all about the woman, her attitudes, and her behaviors.
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thats the whole issue m'Lady..in YOUR mind...YOU aint m a l e !
no self respecting male will prefer a woman that looks and acts male vs a woman that acts and looks female.
doesnt really matter what YOU think...it MATTERS what us guys think.
no guy "I" ever met wants a woman acting and looking like another guy.
and me myself and i...prefer girlie girl foo foo types.
take care
Realy?!
Tell that to my two male partners then I guess and the numerous men I have dated, scened, and enjoy as friends or lovers.
They like me for me -- not for something that I put on or wear. In fact most of them like me with no clothes on best of all.
A personal preference is not the same as solid reality for all "males" or "females".
Some of us "females" actually are more concerned about what we feel like and want than what men want or see -- I consider that one of characteristics of being a dominant in fact. Though I'm sure many folks will disagree with that concept.
This is one of the biggest obstacles "new" femdoms face when they try to get their head around domination and learning to relax and enjoy it. The costumes.
Some submissive men are so wrapped up in their clothing fetishes that it's almost a requirement for a woman to dress that way in order to get him to submit -- or, in order to appeal to his masculine side. The result is a woman in uncomfortable clothing feeling objectified, not empowered.
It's a completely different thing when a woman *chooses* to put on an item of clothing because she knows the effect it has on the man she's with. However, it's a simple matter: Does the effect it has on the man OUTWEIGH the discomfort of the clothing? If she's distracted, forget it. He can be on the floor drooling and all she is thinking about is getting out of the damned clothes.
Subs who have a fetish for girlie clothing don't see what all the hubbub is about because they get turned ON when they wear uncomfortable shoes, tight corsets, itchy stockings or other femme clothing. They don't see what the big deal is, they see it as a privledge to be able to wear such things.
I'd suggest to those subs they consider what it would be like to wear a suit and tie -- or, better yet, a full tuxedo -- every time you were dominated. Including shoes that were too tight. And, you had to keep it all on. Not very sexy any more, is it? Hell, I think men in tuxes are *incredibly hot* and I get wet just looking at them. Am I going to make my man dress up in one every time I am horny? Why on earth would I want to *distract him* with clothing when we could be focussing on each other?
I'll add that I have a huge closet full of fetish gear and about 20 pairs of black patent leather boots. I love to get dressed up in it when I go out dancing or to do my own thing. But I don't wear it to dominate a man, because it's hot and impractical.
Akasha
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