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TWENTY NINE LINES TO MAKE YOU SMILE - 5/15/2009 8:12:04 AM   
beargonewild


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1..  My husband and I divorced over religious differences. He thought  he was God and I didn't. 
2..  I don't suffer from insanity; I enjoy every minute of  it.
3..  Some  people are alive only because it's illegal to kill  them.
4..  I  used to have a handle on life, but it  broke. 
5.. Don't  take life too seriously; No one gets out alive. 

6..  You're  just jealous because the voices only talk to me 
7..  Beauty  is in the eye of the beer holder.
8..  Earth  is the insane asylum for the universe. 

9..  I'm  not a complete idiot -- Some parts are just missing. 
10...  Out  of my mind. Back in five minutes. 

11..  NyQuil,  the stuffy, sneezy, why-the-heck-is-the-room-spinning  medicine.
12..  God must love stupid people; He made so many.
13..  The  gene pool could use a little chlorine.
14..  Consciousness:  That annoying time between naps.
15..  Ever stop to think, and forget to start again? 

16..  Being  'over the hill' is much better than being under  it! 
17..  Wrinkled  Was Not One of the Things I Wanted to Be When I Grew  up. 
18  Procrastinate Now! 

19..  I  Have a Degree in Liberal Arts; Do You Want Fries With  That? 
20.. A  hangover is the wrath of grapes.
21..  A  journey of a thousand miles begins with a cash  advance. 

22..  Stupidity is not a handicap. Park elsewhere! 
23..They  call it PMS because Mad Cow Disease was already  taken. 
24..  He who dies with the most toys is nonetheless  DEAD. 

25..  A  picture is worth a thousand words, but it uses up three 
thousand times the memory. 

26..  Ham and eggs...A day's work for a chicken, a lifetime commitment  for a pig. 
27.. The  trouble with life is there's no background  music. 

28..  The  original point and click interface was a Smith & Wesson. 
29..  I  smile because I don't know what the hell is going on. 



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RE: TWENTY NINE LINES TO MAKE YOU SMILE - 5/17/2009 10:23:04 AM   
FourQ


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RE: TWENTY NINE LINES TO MAKE YOU SMILE - 5/17/2009 11:52:25 AM   
sirsholly


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quote:

Ever stop to think, and forget to start again?
daily

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RE: TWENTY NINE LINES TO MAKE YOU SMILE - 5/17/2009 1:09:31 PM   
Musicmystery


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Status: offline 		I lose my train of thought, and have to wait for the next train.

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RE: TWENTY NINE LINES TO MAKE YOU SMILE - 5/17/2009 1:14:36 PM   
tiinkerbell


Posts: 96
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quote:

10... Out of my mind. Back in five minutes.

quote:

15.. Ever stop to think, and forget to start again?

I can quite easily identify with both of those two

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RE: TWENTY NINE LINES TO MAKE YOU SMILE - 5/17/2009 1:34:01 PM   
Musicmystery


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Status: offline 		When someone gives you a penny for your thoughts, and you put in your two cents worth--what happens to the leftover $.01?

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RE: TWENTY NINE LINES TO MAKE YOU SMILE - 5/17/2009 1:40:52 PM   
tiinkerbell


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quote:

ORIGINAL: Musicmystery

When someone gives you a penny for your thoughts, and you put in your two cents worth--what happens to the leftover $.01?

Taxes?

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Allison

- Some People walk in the rain; others just get wet -
Roger Miller

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RE: TWENTY NINE LINES TO MAKE YOU SMILE - 5/17/2009 1:44:59 PM   
Musicmystery


Posts: 30259
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Status: offline 		Hmmm. I have had some taxing thoughts...

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RE: TWENTY NINE LINES TO MAKE YOU SMILE - 5/17/2009 1:46:42 PM   
tiinkerbell


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quote:

ORIGINAL: Musicmystery

Hmmm. I have had some taxing thoughts...



Be well Sir

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Allison

- Some People walk in the rain; others just get wet -
Roger Miller

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RE: TWENTY NINE LINES TO MAKE YOU SMILE - 5/18/2009 10:30:59 PM   
NightTigress


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Status: offline 		Heard some before, still very cute and too many are too true to me

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RE: TWENTY NINE LINES TO MAKE YOU SMILE - 5/28/2009 7:24:26 PM   
kinkienesss


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RE: TWENTY NINE LINES TO MAKE YOU SMILE - 5/28/2009 7:51:39 PM   
Joseff


Posts: 505
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Status: offline 		I once told my cousin to make up his mind, to which he replied: But I didn't sleep in it last night.

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RE: TWENTY NINE LINES TO MAKE YOU SMILE - 5/28/2009 8:22:21 PM   
MstrPBK


Posts: 573
Joined: 1/2/2008
Status: offline 		Here are a few more from my life:

  • The person with the most friends - Wins ...
  • in the beginning there was chaos - and ever since then there has been ...
  • You want me to do what ... HOW?

MstrPBK
St. Paul, MN USA

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