RE: Anger (Full Version)

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heartcream -> RE: Anger (5/29/2009 4:37:55 PM)

I dont get that whole pov when someone says things like they "have no use for anger" I dont get that and it pisses me off actually.

Anger is an emotion, not something you shop for or not. Anger is a feeling in response to a situation. Whether it is in balance with the actual situation or not is another thing.

Everyone has emotions even if they shame them into the deep crevices of their sub-conscious or not. Fear gets the same treatment oftentimes.

It is what one does with it that is the thing but to say you dont have anger is a joke in my book. To me it is an indication of a fake person, being unreal, bottling it all up. I have heard it is the ones who dont get angry that you need to look out for, straw that broke the camel's back and all that. Tip the numbed out, pushed down scale and whammo pure psycho around the place.




sorrynobsownsme -> RE: Anger (5/29/2009 5:31:26 PM)

I never was an angry person.  I never used to want to punch things or throw something, but I am now as his slave.  I like to think it is the passion that moves me and caring that much.  I am really thinking his means of expressing frustration and most inclimate emotions has rubbed off on me.  Frustration is mostly what I heel or hurt.  I wouldn't describe anger as such an issue as those emotions.  We can't seem to find a way to talk much anymore without it going in the crapper.  Talking happens always on his terms.  I don't feel that he harbors a non judgemental spin free zone to express myself.



OsideGirl -> RE: Anger (5/29/2009 6:15:47 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: heartcream

It is what one does with it that is the thing but to say you dont have anger is a joke in my book.
I have to say.....I thought much the same thing.



Drakontos -> RE: Anger (5/29/2009 6:49:18 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: heartcream

I dont get that whole pov when someone says things like they "have no use for anger" I dont get that and it pisses me off actually.

Anger is an emotion, not something you shop for or not. Anger is a feeling in response to a situation. Whether it is in balance with the actual situation or not is another thing.

Everyone has emotions even if they shame them into the deep crevices of their sub-conscious or not. Fear gets the same treatment oftentimes.

It is what one does with it that is the thing but to say you dont have anger is a joke in my book. To me it is an indication of a fake person, being unreal, bottling it all up. I have heard it is the ones who dont get angry that you need to look out for, straw that broke the camel's back and all that. Tip the numbed out, pushed down scale and whammo pure psycho around the place.



Heartcream, zaphira would have to disagree with you. In all the years that this slave has known Master, she has not once, become angry, or lost her temper with him or with something that he has done. Anger and becoming angry are of no use to this slave. zaphira could rant and rave, throw things, argue with Master; be as angry as she wants to be, and it will not do anything or change anything in Master's eyes. He will still continue with what ever it was that made this slave angry to begin with.

So for zaphira, anger and being angry have no use to her. She does not get angry at Master or at things he may or may not do. She does not get angry at others for things they may or may not do or things they may or may not say. To do so is a waste of this slave's time.



oceanwinds -> RE: Anger (5/29/2009 6:54:08 PM)

Anger is a healthy emotion. It is how you respond to it makes it benifical or not. Anger tells me many things, and it alerts me to these things. I do not respond in anger though. I know for me it is best to calm down for a bit.  To me to deny the emotion of anger is to also deny all emotions; joy, elation and happiness to just name a couple. In my life I find emotions not felt will eventually make me ill. Just doesnt mean i need to react on them, i have enough control to not. 

Edited to say: It is anger that gets a person out of depression and apathy.



marie2 -> RE: Anger (5/29/2009 6:59:55 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: oceanwinds

Anger is a healthy emotion. It is how you respond to it makes it benifical or not. Anger tells me many things, and it alerts me to these things. I do not respond in anger though. I know for me it is best to calm down for a bit.  To me to deny the emotion of anger is to also deny all emotions; joy, elation and happiness to just name a couple. In my life I find emotions not felt will eventually make me ill. Just doesnt mean i need to react on them, i have enough control to not. 


I agree with this completely.  Anger is there for a reason, it tells us when something is "off".  And it's a valid emotion like any other.

I always find it odd when I run across a person who claims they never get angry.  huh? 



DavanKael -> RE: Anger (5/29/2009 10:15:46 PM)

I think that in any depthful relationship, your other (Regardless of side of the kneel) is going to piss you off at times.  Speaking for myself, everyone I've been with in a meaningful way has pissed me off at some time or another and I they (I can be an obnoxious little creature when I wish it).  That's human. 
Now, the idea of buying my placation with a present.  No.  They're separate and distinct things and I think that it sets up a bad feedback loop when you're buying placation. 
  Davan



allisonludwig -> RE: Anger (5/31/2009 8:02:31 AM)

I can only think of a few times that I have been angry with my husband/dom. Sometimes I would rather not continue the discussion, but he wants to talk right then and there. We've raised our voices at each other a few times, but we usually turn it around pretty quickly. I have had difficulty in figuring out how I am supposed to communicate sometimes. when he wants to me to speak up and when he wants me to keep my mouth shut and tell him later or when I am just supposed to put up with the pain or discomfort. . . . but then I realized all I needed to do was just ask him how and when he wants me to communicate.

Having that conversation helped a lot. I still sometimes struggle with knowing when I should stay quiet and when I should speak up. I have learned to soften my bluntness, too. My husband picks up on the small subtleties, so by the time I speak up, he already knows anyway.

Allison



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