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Whats the word "Vanilla" mean to you - 2/9/2006 5:44:38 AM   
sophia37


Posts: 1433
Joined: 2/7/2006
Status: offline 		Hi all, Sophia here. Im starting this new thread becuase I feel the need to jump ship from The Mr Subject Property debate. Althgugh lively, someone wrote that they thought I might BE Mr Subject Property, thanks to our simliar writing styles. Simialr writing styles? Oh I see. similiar as in, he has no sense of humor and I am entirely amused? Well then I guess so.

But truthfully, I think I am the real Sophia37. Somedays, being me is like a form of slavery. Other days, I am totally in control. I practically dominate myself all day long. Since it's early, The verdicts still out for today.

Anyway, heres my lightweight question of the day, for all youz guyz in the know. If you'll notice, my name on the left hand side of the page says Sophia37. Undeneath that it actually says "vanilla". Now how that got there I can not say. Its like the universe has decided who I am for me. Or more mundanely Im sure it has something to do with what I must have done or not done, to achieve the abilty to post here. Anyway.

My new name makes me wonder. What exactly does the word Vanilla mean around here? I see it used a lot. "The Vanilla world" "A Vanilla Marriage"

A Vanilla world??? Now to me, while I was growing up, Vanila ice cream was my favorite flavor. Take me to that Chinese buffet and Im still going for vanilla at the end of dinner (Wow my computer name does fit! How did the universe know??).

Vanilla from what I understand is actually the number one best selling ice cream even today. So wouldnt that mean that "Vanilla", is wonderful or great? Im confused here. I get the feeling its used to describe something less than great on these boards. Is it? Can you give me your definition of the word vanilla?

Thanks guys. Im sure youy'll make my very first Sophia question interesting reading. If we can get the easy questions answered, theres hope for when I start asking the hard ones!
Profile   Post #: 1
RE: Whats the word "Vanilla" mean to you - 2/9/2006 5:48:08 AM   
LuckyAlbatross


Posts: 19224
Joined: 10/25/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: sophia37
Vanilla from what I understand is actually the number one best selling ice cream even today. So wouldnt that mean that "Vanilla", is wonderful or great? Im confused here. I get the feeling its used to describe something less than great on these boards. Is it? Can you give me your definition of the word vanilla?

Vanilla simply is the bdsm sub culture jargonistic term for "not kinky" and "not authority based."

Just as in the Renn Faire/SCA sub culture, the jargonistic term for "not into Renn Faire/SCA" is "mundane."

Most people, despite what they say, are NOT vanilla positive- they put down vanilla sex and relationships as being less than kinky or Ds relationships. However, to me vanilla sex and relationships are no less or better than bdsm/Ds ones are.

And there are many people who are "mint chocolate chip" and such, who enjoy a little bit of kink, a little bit of play, but really don't get into it as a sub culture. I would be mint chocolate chip in terms of SCA stuff.

As far as your forum icon goes, it is related to nothing other than how many posts you have made to the collarme forums.

_____________________________

Find stable partners, not a stable of partners.

"Sometimes my whore logic gets all fuzzy"- Californication

(in reply to sophia37)
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RE: Whats the word "Vanilla" mean to you - 2/9/2006 6:55:42 AM   
Aileen68


Posts: 6091
Joined: 8/2/2005
Status: offline 		Ninety five percent of my life is vanilla. I'm comfortable with it. It's ingrained in me.
I have to enjoy it because it encompasses all of the people on this planet that I dearly love.
That other five percent is all mine. My secret that I don't have to share with anyone.
I love that the five percent of me controls the ninety five percent without a single person in my life realizing
what is my driving force.
My vanilla is good...so very good and satisfying because it's sprinkled with that bit of secret kink.

And I prefer vanilla bean ice cream over just plain vanilla...with a little hot fudge drizzled on top.



(in reply to sophia37)
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RE: Whats the word "Vanilla" mean to you - 2/9/2006 7:30:41 AM   
OscarHargraves


Posts: 693
Joined: 8/9/2005
Status: offline 		Yup! You're right. Vanilla IS great. Like Aileen68, most of my life is vanilla and I'm really quite happy with that. The BDSM part is a big part of who I am but not really a big part of my life.

Oh, Yeah, and I LOVE Vanilla ice cream too......... and chocalate.........and butter pecan......and.............

_____________________________

Never drive faster than your guardian angel can fly ! !

(in reply to sophia37)
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RE: Whats the word "Vanilla" mean to you - 2/9/2006 7:36:06 AM   
Mercnbeth


Posts: 11766
Status: offline
quote:

My new name makes me wonder. What exactly does the word Vanilla mean around here? I see it used a lot. "The Vanilla world" "A Vanilla Marriage"


for this slave, "The Vanilla World" is all of society. those of us who participate in some sort of "alternative" way of doing things are a segment of that vanilla society, in varying degrees.

business meeting=vanilla
business meeting of BDSM outreach organization= not 'nilla

as far as the "vanilla Marriage", this slave sees that as the "typical" male-female contractual relationship that is depicted in the media and lives in just about any neighborhood within our varied society. for this slave, it is an uncomfortable type of relationship doomed for failure that she prays she will never ever be faced with again, however this slave has known a few successfull vanilla marriages, so it isn't like she would say they all suck and have no merit, it's just a personal preference.

here's a few more:
"vanilla" clothes--something you would be able to wear to church, with your MOM
"vanilla" party--no impact play noises and accompanying moans and squeals and nobody brings a toy bag
"summer of vanilla"--when your elderly parents come to stay with you for the summer
"vanilla" wedding--no collaring ceremony planned or already taken place in a clandestine location to coincide with the "civil" ceremony
"vanilla" shoes--flats




(in reply to sophia37)
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RE: Whats the word "Vanilla" mean to you - 2/9/2006 9:26:03 AM   
MysticalPhoenix


Posts: 212
Joined: 11/30/2005
From: Kelloggsville, Vanilla County MI
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: sophia37

A Vanilla world??? Now to me, while I was growing up, Vanila ice cream was my favorite flavor. Take me to that Chinese buffet and Im still going for vanilla at the end of dinner


My favorite chinese buffet has vanilla soft-serve ice cream. And peanuts mixed with powdered sugar to put on it. Mmmmm...

To me, vanilla ice cream is a good metaphor. It's a raw material, a foundation. Although you can eat it on it's own, it can be made into so many things with the addition of say bananas and sauces or hot fudge and nuts.

Those of us who are part of the subculture use vanilla to differentiate between people who are in the subculture, and those who are not. This does not mean that people who are in the subculture are entirely 100% pure kink in every moment of their life. It's a nice utopian fantasy, but it just does not play out in real life.

I would define vanilla (according to how I use it) as "behavior and/or beliefs which meet the accepted cultural standards for normative behaviors and/or beliefs". Having one partner is vanilla. Having more than one be, because that does not meet the accepted cultural standards for normative behavior in Vanilla County, MI, is not vanilla. Being a born-again Xtian is vanilla, paganism-not vanilla. Wearing 5 inch heels-vanilla, wearing ballet boots-not vanilla. But that's only my definition, it is not intended to be anything but.

All of us are some part vanilla (even the most real and true of us). Some are more than others. That does not make them more equal than others, just living a different life. We may go through periods where we are more or less vanilla. I've only got one partner now. That's pretty vanilla, for me.




_____________________________

---------------------------------------------------------
Every one sees what you appear to be, few really know what you are.

(in reply to sophia37)
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RE: Whats the word "Vanilla" mean to you - 2/9/2006 10:20:05 AM   
foxglove716


Posts: 648
Joined: 7/4/2005
Status: offline 		the quick answer is vanilla=non bdsm. But I also think of vanilla as those parts of life that are untouched, a blank canvas. And we all have our own flavours, cinnamon, raspberry, sourkraut, that we have yet to put out there and even more flavours we have yet to experience. Vanilla doesnt mean bad. Its what flavour you add to it that counts. Strawberry? Yummy flavour. Strawberry-vanilla? Divine!

_____________________________

Illusion is the first of all pleasures. -Oscar Wilde

(in reply to sophia37)
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RE: Whats the word "Vanilla" mean to you - 2/9/2006 10:26:33 AM   
BitaTruble


Posts: 9779
Joined: 1/12/2006
From: Texas
Status: offline
quote:

Can you give me your definition of the word vanilla?


Vanilla - Non-alternative expression of sexuality and/or preferences.

When I go to the bank, I'm not 'vanilla', I'm a customer. Banking, shopping, visiting the in-laws has nothing to do with being vanilla or being into an alternative lifestyle. They're just part of life. If you are gay and go pick up your dry-cleaning, you're still gay. You haven't suddenly become vanilla because you are taking care of the business of living. I may not be doing an activity at any given time which is kink related or a direct service to Master, but the core never changes.

YMMV

Celeste

_____________________________

"Oh, so it's just like
Rock, paper, scissors."

He laughed. "You are the wisest woman I know."


(in reply to sophia37)
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RE: Whats the word "Vanilla" mean to you - 2/9/2006 10:40:49 AM   
justatoy2


Posts: 163
Joined: 6/20/2005
Status: offline 		looks at my icon..i am finally indecent..yipeeeeee....as for the term vanilla it makes me think of a huge mound of ice cream and dropping it slowly on someone...oh wait i don't think thats what you all had in mind....never mind....

(in reply to BitaTruble)
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RE: Whats the word "Vanilla" mean to you - 2/9/2006 11:23:04 AM   
dave1212


Posts: 158
Joined: 1/2/2006
From: Lancashire UK
Status: offline
We all surely have a little "nilla" in all of us i mean when i go to work i'm "nilla".....

Pretty sure the boss would not approve of my "alternative" wear ??

Mmmm then again "you never know??"

_____________________________

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~Distracting/reacting~
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~It's haunting how i can't seem to find myself again..
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RE: Whats the word "Vanilla" mean to you - 2/9/2006 11:38:32 AM   
BitaTruble


Posts: 9779
Joined: 1/12/2006
From: Texas
Status: offline
quote:

Pretty sure the boss would not approve of my "alternative" wear ??


Just think of it this way.. you are completely naked under your clothes. ::chuckles::

Celeste



_____________________________

"Oh, so it's just like
Rock, paper, scissors."

He laughed. "You are the wisest woman I know."


(in reply to dave1212)
Profile   Post #: 11
RE: Whats the word "Vanilla" mean to you - 2/9/2006 12:59:30 PM   
MHOO314


Posts: 3628
Joined: 9/26/2004
Status: offline 		A flavoring the boy uses in the special dessert he fixes to give U/us energy at night---mmmm

_____________________________

SLUTS: Southern Ladies Under Tremendous Stress...

Mistress Hathor


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RE: Whats the word "Vanilla" mean to you - 2/9/2006 1:07:39 PM   
xxblushesxx


Posts: 9318
Joined: 11/3/2005
From: Kentucky
Status: offline 		Sophia;

you spell too well,
present yourself too well,
and are too open to others opinions to be the one of which you spoke...

welcome!

oh...and...vanilla means to me, that I need to get some hot fudge and whipped cream!

(in reply to MHOO314)
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RE: Whats the word "Vanilla" mean to you - 2/9/2006 1:16:00 PM   
slavejali


Posts: 2918
Status: offline
quote:

"vanilla" shoes--flats


Damn, i love wearing sandals.. they are very slavey to me *grin*

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RE: Whats the word "Vanilla" mean to you - 2/9/2006 1:19:59 PM   
MistressSassy66


Posts: 1675
Joined: 11/5/2004
Status: offline 		Well all the above answers say it all.But this one I can really relate too.


quote:

When I go to the bank, I'm not 'vanilla', I'm a customer. Banking, shopping, visiting the in-laws has nothing to do with being vanilla or being into an alternative lifestyle. They're just part of life. If you are gay and go pick up your dry-cleaning, you're still gay. You haven't suddenly become vanilla because you are taking care of the business of living.



I personally dont like vanilla ice cream,I'm a strawberry kinda Gal,lol

When I go out I have subtle clothing that sometimes indicates My strawberry side,to those who are in the know.


_____________________________

Mistress Sassy

http://www.mistresssassy.com

In the Immortal Words of Bob....Fuck the dumb shit.

"I love you not only for what you are,But for what I am when I'm with you."- Opening line from a poem by Roy Croft

(in reply to xxblushesxx)
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RE: Whats the word "Vanilla" mean to you - 2/9/2006 2:29:09 PM   
sophia37


Posts: 1433
Joined: 2/7/2006
Status: offline 		Well I have to say thank you all. And what an interesting and intelligent um sometimes vanilla, sometimes not vanilla, bunch of well spoken people you are! And witty too.

The one thing I will most likely take away with me off this posting is the line by Mercnbeth. Thats where she said "summer of vanilla--when your elderly parents come to stay with you for the summer"

Oh Mercnbeth! Please no! One day I will be that parent! Listen. It wont be the summer of vanilla when Sophia shows up at age 80. Ive got 35 years to prepare I guess. I pray it'll wont be remembered as the summer from hell either.

So you guys sure better start laying on me all the kinkiest ideas I can store up and pull out of my magic granny bag. Lets start thinking of this 80 year old as the future Mary Poppins with twist! Or Kink, or fudge toppings. If theres grand children involved a nice flail aughta do the trick. Granny in Leather? I couldnt do the spike heels tho, cause I'd get stuck in the ground while chasing everyone with my flail around the yard.

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RE: Whats the word "Vanilla" mean to you - 2/9/2006 2:47:03 PM   
xxblushesxx


Posts: 9318
Joined: 11/3/2005
From: Kentucky
Status: offline 		oh Lord, Sophia...there are just some things we don't wanna imagine our parents or grandparents doing....

how bout just 'fun' grandma?....let them do things mom and dad don't...maybe tell a dirty joke or two and have a martini...but...past that...idk...

*g*

anyway, you do have a while to consider it!

(in reply to sophia37)
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RE: Whats the word "Vanilla" mean to you - 2/9/2006 2:47:43 PM   
SimplyV


Posts: 351
Joined: 11/5/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: sophia37

Well I have to say thank you all. And what an interesting and intelligent um sometimes vanilla, sometimes not vanilla, bunch of well spoken people you are! And witty too.

The one thing I will most likely take away with me off this posting is the line by Mercnbeth. Thats where she said "summer of vanilla--when your elderly parents come to stay with you for the summer"

Oh Mercnbeth! Please no! One day I will be that parent! Listen. It wont be the summer of vanilla when Sophia shows up at age 80. Ive got 35 years to prepare I guess. I pray it'll wont be remembered as the summer from hell either.

So you guys sure better start laying on me all the kinkiest ideas I can store up and pull out of my magic granny bag. Lets start thinking of this 80 year old as the future Mary Poppins with twist! Or Kink, or fudge toppings. If theres grand children involved a nice flail aughta do the trick. Granny in Leather? I couldnt do the spike heels tho, cause I'd get stuck in the ground while chasing everyone with my flail around the yard.


*laughs* Oddly enough this post brought out the inner sadist in me. Or should I say my inner evil streak. While it might be fun to be the cool mom/grandma, I know myself. When I'm 80 and visiting my kids/grandkids, I'm gunna be that mean old lady that "tsks" every time they even look at each other sexily. *grins evily* What could be more fun than being a complete pain the ass and they can't do anything about it. Ah... The perks of being elderly.

Besides.. having to steak around and be all "innocent" can be quite erotic in its own way.. Hmm.. maybe I'd be actually doing them a favor by torturing them that way.

k.. I gotta stop thinking about this.. Never in my life have I wanted to be old .. until now.

*runs off to get her anti-wrinkle cream*

(in reply to sophia37)
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RE: Whats the word "Vanilla" mean to you - 2/9/2006 2:50:10 PM   
PenelopePitstop


Posts: 254
Joined: 4/22/2005
From: UK
Status: offline 		I like Foxglove's interpretation.

Vanilla = Unexplored
Vanilla = Everything your parents would approve of
Vanilla = The Seventh Circle of My Personal Hell.

_____________________________

Wickedness is a myth created by good people to account for the curious attractiveness of others ~ Oscar Wilde

"You had me at Goodbye"

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RE: Whats the word "Vanilla" mean to you - 2/9/2006 2:59:43 PM   
SimplyV


Posts: 351
Joined: 11/5/2005
Status: offline 		Vanilla.. The masses. Normalicy.. Mundane.. The acceptance of standard society. Inside the box. Life with boundaries unexplored.

I can't say that any one activity really defines things as non-vanilla. For me, its more of the underlying structure? The actively seeking out desires which society may deem as abnormal.. and seeking them with full knowledge and in an educated and structured manner. Exploration with purpose.



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