RE: I am just not interested (Full Version)

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LATEXBABY64 -> RE: I am just not interested (6/11/2009 7:08:44 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: lally2

a little bell tinkled as i read youre OP and the subsequent answers.  im going to suggest a thought that came through, you can discard it immediately if its crap, i dont know you and i dont know youre situation, but this is what came into my head anyway.

when i was in a relationship where the level of control became too much, i said nothing, there were times when i even provoked him, i wanted him to push me so far over the edge that the question of walking was no longer anathama to me. i remember feeling incredibly empty and angry and i turned that against him, believing it was all just pointless and over.   it all went to hell, the relationship ended because it had to and i walked away from Ds for a number of years.  so yes, it did come back, it never went, it just wasnt working with him.  but maybe if id talked to him instead of using everything we did as a reason to leave we might have worked it out.

people seem to be afraid of transitional change, that somehow it means that its all come to an end, when in fact all that it is, is that you have moved on from what youre doing and you need to review and recharge and maybe alter the emphasis somewhere.  relationships rarely stay the same, if they do they become stagnant and die just as easily as if they change too much to continue.  the easy route is to say its over and leave.  the real test is to ride the transition and come out the other end still in tact.  but it takes communication.

its far better to talk and then go from there.


this is the best  I have been here at this crossroads.  its form of manipulation to get rid guilt and have excuses. to have a finale solution to something.  but I think the best approch is how much you love this person  First thing keep everyone out we here can only see through a two d  window thats never a good thing

  See out a good friend you can talk to who you known for years who knows your lifestyle love takes work and it takes two  i wish you luck with this and hopes it turns out like you want




FullfigRIMAAM1 -> RE: I am just not interested (6/11/2009 7:12:59 AM)

Please talk with your husband/master.
I cannot imagine the upside (for either of you), of continuing the way you are feeling.    I would absolutely hate it, if the person I was with was amusing me, and feeling this miserable before/during or after.   I would hate it even more, if I didn't pick it up, and he didn't share it with me.  
It's entirely possible he knows some of this, and will try to connect with you differently.
Good luck,    M




MistressSunny -> RE: I am just not interested (6/11/2009 7:24:33 AM)

I agree with everyone here.... see your dr NOW.

Please understand that this is my opinion, and as i know very little about you, your relationship or other outside influences i am basically peeing in the wind.

If you are concerned about your relationship dying because you are for the time being unable to handle the pain etc, compromise. It is the best tool we have in any relationship. If you are worried about stopping this kind of play completly then compromise is the way to go, if you are able to do that. Discuss this with him and decide on a cue you can give him if it is getting to much. just a thought. But if things are unable to be compromised then youwill need to find another dynamic to help you both through this. Here is another one as well. Maybe, just maybe it has lost some of its shine to him as well. Maybe he is doing it for the simple reason as he knows( thinks) that you like it like that. Not all Dom/mes are bastards/heartless/selfish people. They do care and want to please as much as being pleased. It seems communication has not been a strong point of late, and i am sorry but the only real way to start to heal is to talk, talk, talk talk. 

Please let us know how you go as we are all worried about you and I am sure i am right in saying you are in our thoughts.

Sunny




Kana -> RE: I am just not interested (6/11/2009 10:10:02 PM)

I'm not even going to try and offer a solution., just wish you the best of luck in resolving this.
That's a tough situation to be in. Best wishes.




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