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RE: Femdoms don't exist. You heard it here. - 6/23/2009 1:43:07 PM   
LaTigresse


Posts: 26123
Joined: 1/15/2006
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quote:

ORIGINAL: slavekal

By the original poster's logic, humans should submit to horses. 

Where do people need guns?  Dangerous big cities, the woods where dangerous wild animals live...Many anti gun people seem to have a method of self defense that consists solely of hoping that nothing bad ever happens.


It is quite interesting that that grated on you so much......




_____________________________

My twisted, self deprecating, sense of humour, finds alot to laugh about, in your lack of one!

Just because you are well educated, articulate, and can use big, fancy words, properly........does not mean you are right!

(in reply to slavekal)
Profile   Post #: 81
RE: Femdoms don't exist. You heard it here. - 6/23/2009 2:09:29 PM   
LadyHexx


Posts: 48
Joined: 2/27/2009
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Dont forget, a REAL Femdom would never ever spend time on a web page like this, because she has a never ending supply of subs in her stable to pick from

(in reply to LaTigresse)
Profile   Post #: 82
RE: Femdoms don't exist. You heard it here. - 6/23/2009 2:10:02 PM   
MarcEsadrian


Posts: 852
Joined: 8/24/2008
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quote:

ORIGINAL: AAkasha


The reason subs are correct when they say femdoms (here on CM, and at clubs, and everywhere) are fake is because it's true. Ladies, just get over it, and accept it. 

The perception of the "dominant female" in the submissive mind, if he has learned of female domination via fantasy and/or badly produced porn, is that a dominant woman:

* Pursues men indiscriminately.  The only requirement is his availability and willingness to submit.
* Is attracted to a man who has nothing to offer other than his slavery (which is conditional)
* Expects no effort from the man at all

This is why there is TRUTH to the assessment that "real femdoms do not exist."  This is what these men seek.  When they realize that seeking, courting and engaging a dominant woman is the SAME as courting a vanilla woman but requires actually MORE effort, and that dominant women are as selective if not more than their "vanilla" counterparts, all his ideals and fantasies go "poof" and he's left bitter and angry.


Are there any other misconceptions about "real female dominant" that should be addressed?


An astute post, and one not without a handful of truth, though I would caution against running with the these men paradigm too much regarding the familiar dissent of males. There is a lot of predation and wagon jumping going on, particularly online. "Fake" is sometimes a perfectly valid assessment to make when we all know some individuals get in on the scene only as a front for justifying their shallowness and greed, with no intent of ever making the illusion a reality. But that door does swing both ways, indeed.



< Message edited by MarcEsadrian -- 6/23/2009 2:13:34 PM >

(in reply to AAkasha)
Profile   Post #: 83
RE: Femdoms don't exist. You heard it here. - 6/23/2009 3:16:19 PM   
PeonForHer


Posts: 19612
Joined: 9/27/2008
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quote:

ORIGINAL: LaTigresse

quote:

ORIGINAL: slavekal

By the original poster's logic, humans should submit to horses. 

Where do people need guns?  Dangerous big cities, the woods where dangerous wild animals live...Many anti gun people seem to have a method of self defense that consists solely of hoping that nothing bad ever happens.


It is quite interesting that that grated on you so much......



I don't 'hope' that nothing bad will happen - I know that nothing bad will happen.  Why is this?  Because I live in a country that is almost entirely anti-gun. 


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http://www.domme-chronicles.com


(in reply to LaTigresse)
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RE: Femdoms don't exist. You heard it here. - 6/23/2009 3:33:32 PM   
RedMagic1


Posts: 6470
Joined: 5/10/2007
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quote:

ORIGINAL: MarcEsadrian
"Fake" is sometimes a perfectly valid assessment to make when we all know some individuals get in on the scene only as a front for justifying their shallowness and greed, with no intent of ever making the illusion a reality. But that door does swing both ways, indeed.

Yes.


_____________________________

Not with envy, not with a twisted heart, shall you feel superior, or go about boasting. Rather in goodness by action make true your song and your word. Thus you shall be highly regarded, and able to live in peace with all others.
- 15th century Aztec

(in reply to MarcEsadrian)
Profile   Post #: 85
RE: Femdoms don't exist. You heard it here. - 6/23/2009 3:50:11 PM   
AAkasha


Posts: 4429
Joined: 11/27/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: MarcEsadrian



An astute post, and one not without a handful of truth, though I would caution against running with the these men paradigm too much regarding the familiar dissent of males. There is a lot of predation and wagon jumping going on, particularly online. "Fake" is sometimes a perfectly valid assessment to make when we all know some individuals get in on the scene only as a front for justifying their shallowness and greed, with no intent of ever making the illusion a reality. But that door does swing both ways, indeed.




Ok, I give you that - fake does sometimes simply mean "fake." 
But I think the further thought process on this thread, and the women that post here and other places frequently, are that there is a fantasy of "what a female dominant is" and it is perpetuated by men and male fantasy and is driven by a male market, and some men are very, very focused on these fantasy objects, and an entire industry is supported by it.  So the cycle continues.

Putting that thought aside ENTIRELY, you have another reality:  There are women that enjoy dominating men, including the fetishes, including S&M, and do it for themselves, and are compelled to do it - and it has nothing to do with being expected to behave this way by men, being asked to do it by a boyfriend or being paid to do it.  I am just as compelled to dominate a man, often in the nasty and degrading ways that these men dream of, and it's all authentic and organic: I do exist.  I know others exist.  But there is NO definition of who we are, what we like, and how we are motivated that can be defined at all by femdom pornography or anything created by men, consumed by men or driven by men.  Sure, there may be some overlap, but I think mostly we (femdoms) are a "species" that is totally misunderstood by submissive men.  The way we act and how we process our urges is never represented in mainstream or fetish bdsm porn.

We don't fit into the categories that they want/expect us to, and we are not motivated in the ways that they are.  Most importantly, we did not "learn" dominance and how dominant women behave from the BDSM pornography; yet, submissive men have learned how to behave an identify as submissive men, mostly, from these pornographic images. Hence the major, major disconnect.

And at the end of the day, when the "true" submissive (meaning he honestly, truly has deep, organic fetishes and drives for power exchange) sees what the "true" femdom is, she is about as far away from his fantasy than he can imagine; he's better off with a reluctant vanilla girlfriend who may dress up and call him names because she loves him.

Akasha


_____________________________

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Don't email me here, email me at [email protected]

(in reply to MarcEsadrian)
Profile   Post #: 86
RE: Femdoms don't exist. You heard it here. - 6/23/2009 5:19:33 PM   
LATEXBABY64


Posts: 2107
Joined: 4/8/2004
Status: offline
wow just give me the old west where a cow girl was just that a you could shoot someone just for looking at ya god guns and guts yeahaw lol

(in reply to AAkasha)
Profile   Post #: 87
RE: Femdoms don't exist. You heard it here. - 6/23/2009 9:12:36 PM   
theRose4U


Posts: 3403
Joined: 8/22/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Venatrix

Let's not forget that real dominas have a desire to dominate a man instantly, regardless of whether they know anything about him.  That's how they know I'm a fake:  'cause I actually have to get to know someone well before I have any interest in dominating him. 

You left out that we are ALL immediately turned on by ___(fill in the blank kink) that is their deepest and almost always yet unexplored desire. They seem horrified and shocked that no, raping them with a strap on isn't what I've been waiting for all my life and that cross dressing them is too freakin much trouble for someone to draw attention I DON'T WANT.
Think that I'm going next halloween as a life support system for a whip. Put it in the kink fun house right next to the porn evil steriotype that violates anyone coming into her realm. wait...think we could charge extra for that??? LOL

_____________________________

Finding a good sub is like sifting through trail mix. You find a few fruits, a lotta nuts and have to sift to get to the sweet and special ones
drama llama

(in reply to Venatrix)
Profile   Post #: 88
RE: Femdoms don't exist. You heard it here. - 6/23/2009 9:16:20 PM   
theRose4U


Posts: 3403
Joined: 8/22/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: MzMia
 

"Help me stop being a wannabe and become a real Dominant woman, that is all I ask!  I realize it takes more years of training than an M.D., but one day I will stop being a wannabe and become a real one, like those REAL Dominant women on Collarme!"
 
ROFLMAO!

Why did I just flash on pinnochio in leather saying "please just make me a real little dom"?

_____________________________

Finding a good sub is like sifting through trail mix. You find a few fruits, a lotta nuts and have to sift to get to the sweet and special ones
drama llama

(in reply to MzMia)
Profile   Post #: 89
RE: Femdoms don't exist. You heard it here. - 6/24/2009 5:10:03 AM   
slavekal


Posts: 1486
Joined: 7/20/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: LaTigresse

quote:

ORIGINAL: slavekal

By the original poster's logic, humans should submit to horses. 

Where do people need guns?  Dangerous big cities, the woods where dangerous wild animals live...Many anti gun people seem to have a method of self defense that consists solely of hoping that nothing bad ever happens.


It is quite interesting that that grated on you so much......

It really does.  I have been involved in that debate many times.  I find it very irritating that there are people in this world who think they have the right to tell me that I have to be a victim, that I do not have a right to defend my life.





_____________________________

"The Courage to Submit: the submissive male's guide to finding a dominant woman"
http://www.lulu.com/product/paperback/the-courage-to-submit-the-guide-for-the-submissive-male-seeking-a-dominant-woman/5968917

(in reply to LaTigresse)
Profile   Post #: 90
RE: Femdoms don't exist. You heard it here. - 6/27/2009 5:06:11 PM   
Racquelle


Posts: 600
Joined: 4/21/2008
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Did anyone remember to state that femdoms don't fall in love?

(in reply to slavekal)
Profile   Post #: 91
RE: Femdoms don't exist. You heard it here. - 6/28/2009 3:12:53 AM   
DemonKia


Posts: 5521
Joined: 10/13/2007
From: Chico, Nor-Cali
Status: offline
Ah, good one, Racquelle . . . .. Inaccessible, unattainable ice princesses, eternally aloof . . . . .



< Message edited by DemonKia -- 6/28/2009 3:13:10 AM >

(in reply to Racquelle)
Profile   Post #: 92
RE: Femdoms don't exist. You heard it here. - 6/28/2009 8:05:52 AM   
thetammyjo


Posts: 6322
Joined: 9/8/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: FawneTwo

AAkasha - Your post is fabulous. Some people may be intimidated by your succinct declaration but I applaud you.

I wish there was another word for femdom . Why is the fem an add on, a qualifacation? Like men are the only bosses?

A bright topic
Thanks


The vast majority of the time I just say that I have a dominant personality and take the dominant role in relationships unless I must, for some communication reason, use "femdom" as shorthand.

Most of the time, I really just call myself TammyJo.

_____________________________

Love, Peace, Hugs, Kisses, Whips & Chains,

TammyJo

Check out my website at http://www.thetammyjo.com Or www.tammyjoeckhart.com

And my LJ where I post fiction in progress if you "friend" me at http://thetammyjo.livejournal.com/

(in reply to FawneTwo)
Profile   Post #: 93
RE: Femdoms don't exist. You heard it here. - 6/28/2009 5:14:44 PM   
Whiplashsmile4


Posts: 2305
Joined: 12/2/2008
Status: offline
You know you with a female Dominant when they hook their leg behind yours, set you off balance, and you wind up back down on a picnic table and they are on top of you attacking like a mad sex frienzy animal.

But seriously, there are a lot of stereotypes in the lifestyle or BDSM in general. Some of it is rooted in fantasy, like bad urban legend combined with ingorance.

Oh damn my imagine of Dominant Women is totally shattered after reading this thread (sarcastic joke).

Man Hater is one of the common misconceptions.

(in reply to AAkasha)
Profile   Post #: 94
RE: Femdoms don't exist. You heard it here. - 6/28/2009 8:59:29 PM   
MeaganBlake


Posts: 56
Joined: 1/8/2009
From: Central Ohio
Status: offline
I'm not a real femdom because I live six states away from my slave. I actually got two e-mails telling me that in the same day. One guy said he "reported me as a fake." That cracked me up. I asked him who he reported me to, the kinky police?

_____________________________

Meagan



(in reply to Whiplashsmile4)
Profile   Post #: 95
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