the difference between men and women (Full Version)

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collieloveruk -> the difference between men and women (2/13/2006 5:24:14 PM)

A WOMAN’S ENGLISH:
1. Yes = No
2. No = Yes
3. Maybe = No!
4. We need = I want.
5. I am sorry = you'll be sorry
6. We need to talk = you’re in trouble
7. Sure, go ahead = you better not
8. Do what you want = you will pay for this later
9. I am not upset = Of course I am upset, you moron!
10. You're certainly attentive tonight = is sex all you ever think about?

A MAN’S ENGLISH:
1. I am hungry = I am hungry
2. I am sleepy = I am sleepy
3. I am tired = I am tired
4. Nice dress = Nice cleavage!
5. I love you = let’s have sex now
6. I am bored = Do you want to have sex?
7. May I have this dance? = I'd like to have sex with you
8. Can I call you sometime? = I'd like to have sex with you
9. Do you want to go to a movie? = I'd like to have sex with you
10. Can I take you out to dinner? = I'd like to have sex with you
11. I don't think those shoes go with that outfit = I'm gay




Termyn8or -> RE: the difference between men and women (2/13/2006 9:20:57 PM)

Well, being a Man I guess I might be qualified to respond here.

Would you like something to drink= I am going to get me another beer

The car needs a tuneup=We will keep the beer outside, because I couldn't catch up to this nice looking honey on a Harley

I'm cold=I want to have sex with you (amazing how well this one works, whether it's winter or you just got out of the shower)

I'm quitting that F_______ job ! = They are going to fire me tomorrow when they find out what I did

You have to blow the dust out of speakers from time to time=I really like this song

Call my boss and tell him I'm dead=I surfed porn until 6 AM

I'm going to play cards=No paycheck this week

This is business=Don't ask

(after hard work) Every bone in my body aches=Can you get on top this time ?

(on a Wednesday) Call the pizza place=I destroyed the gas line so we have no stove or heat

(in a monotonic manner) I AM ON THE PHONE=I have already killed three Women for bothering me on the phone

T




MarksFantasyGirl -> RE: the difference between men and women (2/14/2006 7:30:47 PM)

when Women say: I'm cold--Let me put my cold feet on your warm body...
I just don't feel good tonight-- I don't want to have sex with you, I just want you to act like you care, and really feel bad, cuddle me, and don't get mad that we aren't going to have sex...
I want to have sex with you-- And only you.... for the rest of my life... and I want you to ask me to marry you, and pay for the wedding... take me to cancun for our hunny-moon.... have 3 kids, drive a minivan, let me decorate your house... and never EVER look at another woman again....




HouseofBear -> RE: the difference between men and women (2/15/2006 3:31:39 PM)

I enjoy having a nice warm butt to put my cold feet on, lol. Ice play?




Tapestry -> RE: the difference between men and women (2/16/2006 6:02:08 AM)

Well of course saying I'm cold means I want to warm my feet up on your nice warm body.
But turn about is fair play, and when Master is cold, my warm body is all His to use to warm up on/with.
(Well ok, yes, this body is always His, to use when and how He sees fit, but you know what i mean!)




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