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how do i introduce myself to a dominant woman? - 6/23/2009 9:41:20 PM   
underdogg4


Posts: 4
Joined: 4/25/2009
Status: offline 		i've been submissive my whole life but never been into the scene..
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RE: how do i introduce myself to a dominant woman? - 6/23/2009 9:48:38 PM   
LadyNTrainer


Posts: 1584
Joined: 5/20/2009
Status: offline 		In short, politely.  Leading with your sex drive never helps, even if you are meeting these women on adult BDSM sites.  Try being pleasant, personable, and actually interested in what she has to say on her profile or casually in conversation, BEFORE telling her in graphic detail about what you would like her to do to your penis.  I promise the former will go over a lot better than the latter.  I am however unsure as to why so many "submissives" do choose the latter approach.  

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RE: how do i introduce myself to a dominant woman? - 6/23/2009 10:22:53 PM   
FullfigRIMAAM1


Posts: 1160
Joined: 11/20/2008
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quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyNTrainer
BEFORE telling her in graphic detail about what you would like her to do to your penis
I agree with everything except this part.    There is NEVER a time in email when it is a good idea to tell her in graphic detail what you would like her to do to your penis, EXCEPT when she asks you for that information. 
quote:

...I am however unsure as to why so many "submissives" do choose the latter approach.
Yes, it's a mistery to many of us.    M

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RE: how do i introduce myself to a dominant woman? - 6/23/2009 10:24:40 PM   
ThatDamnedPanda


Posts: 6060
Joined: 1/26/2009
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyNTrainer

In short, politely.  Leading with your sex drive never helps, even if you are meeting these women on adult BDSM sites.  Try being pleasant, personable, and actually interested in what she has to say on her profile or casually in conversation, BEFORE telling her in graphic detail about what you would like her to do to your penis.  I promise the former will go over a lot better than the latter.  I am however unsure as to why so many "submissives" do choose the latter approach.  


That's their way of letting you know who's really doing the thinking in their life.


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In the forest of the night
What immortal hand or eye
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RE: how do i introduce myself to a dominant woman? - 6/23/2009 10:25:49 PM   
ThatDamnedPanda


Posts: 6060
Joined: 1/26/2009
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: underdogg4

i've been submissive my whole life but never been into the scene..


Help us help you, bro - give us a little more information. Are you talking about online, real life, or what?


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Panda, panda, burning bright
In the forest of the night
What immortal hand or eye
Made you all black and white and roly-poly like that?


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RE: how do i introduce myself to a dominant woman? - 6/23/2009 11:13:41 PM   
littlesarbonn


Posts: 1710
Joined: 12/3/2005
From: Stockton, California
Status: offline 		I always invite them out for snow cones. Every now and then they say yes. I used to ask them if they wanted to pet my stuffed animals, but that just resulted in restraining orders. I mean, I wanted to be restrained, but that just wasn't the same.

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RE: how do i introduce myself to a dominant woman? - 6/24/2009 1:12:50 AM   
darchChylde


Posts: 5279
Joined: 9/28/2006
From: Warm Springs, GA but i live in San Francisco.
Status: offline 		Pretend she's not a dominant for a minute and say hi to the woman.  If the woman doesn't like you, you don't have a chance with the dominant.  Say hi and introduce yourself just like you would to anyone else.  Hopefully, this means politely and with respect.

On the other hand, sometimes just saying "Nice Boots!!!" is a great icebreaker.  Note:  Should only be attempted when she is wearing boots, and care must be taken in loud areas so that it is clear that you are saying "boots" and not some other similar word. 

Really, everyone is different and it's hard to be certain what will really get her attention (positively).  But, in the end i have to go back to the truism that it's hard to go wrong with a simple, polite greeting and let her take the ball from there if she chooses to do so. 

Who knows, you might even end up with something more valuable than a dominant; you could make a friend.  And if you've impressed her; even if she's not interested, your new friend may even know someone who is looking for someone just like you.


< Message edited by darchChylde -- 6/24/2009 1:23:35 AM >

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RE: how do i introduce myself to a dominant woman? - 6/24/2009 5:12:54 AM   
slavekal


Posts: 1486
Joined: 7/20/2004
Status: offline 		Dude, there are dozens of things you could and should do to meet a Mistress.  We can't possibly cover them all here.

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RE: how do i introduce myself to a dominant woman? - 6/24/2009 5:43:25 AM   
PeonForHer


Posts: 19612
Joined: 9/27/2008
Status: offline 		Being gentlemanly always helps.  I just send my two lads Razors and Knuckles round to invite the lady in question politely to tea.

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RE: how do i introduce myself to a dominant woman? - 6/24/2009 1:15:32 PM   
LadyNTrainer


Posts: 1584
Joined: 5/20/2009
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: FullfigRIMAAM1
There is NEVER a time in email when it is a good idea to tell her in graphic detail what you would like her to do to your penis, EXCEPT when she asks you for that information.


Too true.  It is unfortunate that so many men lead with that specific sort of material, causing them to be permanently relegated to the ban-bin of "people I never, EVER want to talk to or meet."  After it has been established that you are polite and personable, and she likes you, and she has indicated a willingness to play with you, details of your kinky likes and limits are reasonably appropriate.  But not before then, and not in the first email, to be sure.

I mean, really, guys.  WTF are you thinking to write to a complete stranger just to talk about your wang?  Do you really, honestly think that this is attractive or interesting to a domme?  I'd like a serious answer if possible.

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RE: how do i introduce myself to a dominant woman? - 6/24/2009 1:49:06 PM   
ThatDamnedPanda


Posts: 6060
Joined: 1/26/2009
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyNTrainer

I mean, really, guys.  WTF are you thinking to write to a complete stranger just to talk about your wang?  Do you really, honestly think that this is attractive or interesting to a domme?  I'd like a serious answer if possible.



And once they've answered that, I'd really like to hear some firsthand confirmation of whether it's ever actually worked. Not because I'm thinking of trying it, but because I have yet to hear of it ever happening.


_____________________________

Panda, panda, burning bright
In the forest of the night
What immortal hand or eye
Made you all black and white and roly-poly like that?


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RE: how do i introduce myself to a dominant woman? - 6/24/2009 1:59:46 PM   
PeonForHer


Posts: 19612
Joined: 9/27/2008
Status: offline 		I'd like to read an answer too, Panda - but of course we won't see one.  Dominants generally write in their profiles that they don't want this "I have a huge dick for your use Mistress' (or similar), but the profiles aren't read.  If such people don't read profiles, it's unlikely they'll read anything on this forum either, let alone post on it.

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RE: how do i introduce myself to a dominant woman? - 6/24/2009 2:11:00 PM   
AAkasha


Posts: 4429
Joined: 11/27/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: ThatDamnedPanda

quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyNTrainer

I mean, really, guys.  WTF are you thinking to write to a complete stranger just to talk about your wang?  Do you really, honestly think that this is attractive or interesting to a domme?  I'd like a serious answer if possible.



And once they've answered that, I'd really like to hear some firsthand confirmation of whether it's ever actually worked. Not because I'm thinking of trying it, but because I have yet to hear of it ever happening.



Yes, it works in some cases: When the person receiving it is playing the "role" of a sex-starved, indiscriminate femdom who will dominate ANY man who comes across her path.  In essence - a man pretending to be a woman to get his jollies, or a woman pretending to be uber-femdom so she can milk some cash out of the guy in a later email.

But the reason the men don't change their approach, I think, is this: If they know they have a 20% chance of getting a reply if they approach a woman and treat her as a woman and a lady with class, that 'lady of class' does not really meet their preferred image of a "femdom" - they WANT the woman who replies to be one that gets hot and excited from an unsolicited cock photo, even if the response rate is .0004% -- they get excited that this chance EVEN exists at all.

The other reason they do it is because their fantasy begins and ends when they hit "send."  They are the Internet version of a flasher.  They are stroking, getting hard, shooting their load at the idea that a sexy, hot femdom will open their mail, look at their dick, even delete the picture and never reply. It doesn't matter. In his head, he imagines she is opening it and looking. He got his rocks off when he hit send, and he's not waiting with baited breath for her email response.

The final theory is that they want a response, any response, even if it's "EWW GROSS!! You asshole!" -- that response, the shock, disgust, even insults -- they don't care, they are getting off on that. Even the long, drawn out "look dude, this is not the right approach.." email gets them hot. It means she LOOKED at it.  He's loving it. So if he sends 100 unsolicited cock shots and gets 3 responses, he got his ORIGINAL erection/orgasm when he hit send, plus THREE bonus cum-loads when he opened the responses...

So just delete/block them. Do not even reply.

Akasha


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RE: how do i introduce myself to a dominant woman? - 6/24/2009 6:05:47 PM   
DarkSteven


Posts: 28072
Joined: 5/2/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: AAkasha
If they know they have a 20% chance of getting a reply if they approach a woman and treat her as a woman and a lady with class,

Akasha



My response rate from Dominas is significantly higher than 20%.

1. Most of them know me from my posts here already.
2. I either respond to something specific in their profile or a post, or tease/flirt with them.  I told one that if she changed from Dominant to submissive and moved to Colorado, I'd date her.
3. As a Dominant man, I'm not seeking anything from them except as online friends and maybe a tease-buddy.  No stress.


_____________________________

"You women....

The small-breasted ones want larger breasts. The large-breasted ones want smaller ones. The straight-haired ones curl their hair, and the curly-haired ones straighten theirs...

Quit fretting. We men love you."

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RE: how do i introduce myself to a dominant woman? - 6/26/2009 2:57:37 PM   
Belittled


Posts: 40
Joined: 5/26/2006
Status: offline 		I figure it would be easier to just give you a list of what NOT to do, since introduction to anyone is pretty damn simple, and varies with people's preferences and tastes. However, I can wager that I have less of a chance hitting and missing with what you shouldn't say or do.

1) Don't be a fool. Pretty simple.
2) Don't flaunt that you're a fool. Honestly? I don't know what's more depressing, the idea that people introduce themselves with "this one has a 3cm penis which sparkles at night and has 3 testes all inverted, Mistress. Plz use me. I live wit my mom and am 54 2999lbs. Plz tell me how wurthless i m. tnx u"

Just don't do it, man.

(in reply to DarkSteven)
Profile   Post #: 15
RE: how do i introduce myself to a dominant woman? - 6/26/2009 3:00:10 PM   
thetammyjo


Posts: 6322
Joined: 9/8/2005
Status: offline 		It really depends on the venue you go to.

Where do you meet "dominant women"? How do you know they are in that category? If it's online you should check their profile and see if they say anything about how they want to be approached and then follow it. If it's in meatlife just be a normal polite person.

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RE: how do i introduce myself to a dominant woman? - 6/26/2009 8:05:48 PM   
pyroaquatic


Posts: 1535
Joined: 12/4/2006
From: Pyroaquatica
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: underdogg4

i've been submissive my whole life but never been into the scene..


Mentally sever your penis from your person and lead with your brain and heart! Most of the energy produces from the caloric intake is used by that cranium, ya know. There is no reason why the penis needs to rob the spiritus vitae...

Sit upon the leopard's skin and conquer your lust. The love will come naturally.

Good Luck Dog Under, Under Dog.... entity thing.


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RE: how do i introduce myself to a dominant woman? - 6/26/2009 9:20:17 PM   
StoneFox


Posts: 131
Joined: 1/25/2009
Status: offline 		Well, since I happen to be a Dominant Woman, I guess I'll chuck in my 2 cents...

I tend to like people that are polite and sociable and funny (where appropriate). Extend yourself and if I'm interested it'll be obvious. I'll smile and laugh and seem genuinely pleased to be around you. Conversation will happen naturally. If I'm not interested in any way/shape/form...I will interact as little as possible without being blatantly rude and hope you go away (just bein' honest). If you don't take the hint, I'll either walk away or tell you goodbye. All this is assuming of course that you're meeting her in real life.

If you're attempting to introduce yourself online, I would suggest firstly having a clear face photo either on your profile or enclosed in your initial email. As to content, again be polite. I find one-liners to be ok if they can SAY something with that one line. And if someone is interested in being my sub, they should express interest upfront if I make clear that I'm looking. If they don't...then I might pass them by for someone else who DID make it clear they were interested. Simple enough :)


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RE: how do i introduce myself to a dominant woman? - 6/26/2009 9:34:31 PM   
MidnightKat5000


Posts: 97
Joined: 1/10/2009
Status: offline 		Yes, be polite and be yourself.  Although some may say it, we are not completely unapproachable. I like a sub to make a move, it tells me he is interested; we are sadly not a mind readers.

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RE: how do i introduce myself to a dominant woman? - 6/26/2009 9:53:30 PM   
littlesarbonn


Posts: 1710
Joined: 12/3/2005
From: Stockton, California
Status: offline 		Nobody seems to go for my snow cone approach. :(

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<---- FYI, this picture looks JUST like me


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The Adventures of Stickman and the Unemployed Lego Spaceman

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