RE: Lets here your best why I was not at work excuse, I just heard my best... (Full Version)

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lronitulstahp -> RE: Lets here your best why I was not at work excuse, I just heard my best... (6/25/2009 1:14:32 PM)

i knew a girl who said she'd used the excuse "I had an abortion" on a few different jobs.
Most HR people don't want to broach the subject...so they gave her the time she "needed".





Asherdelampyr -> RE: Lets here your best why I was not at work excuse, I just heard my best... (6/25/2009 1:16:29 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: lronitulstahp

i knew a girl who said she'd used the excuse "I had an abortion" on a few different jobs.
Most HR people don't want to broach the subject...so they gave her the time she "needed".




Now I see where the Pro-Life crowd is getting upset!
4-5 people like her and it starts to look like people are having an abortion after each weekend. [8|]




SavageFaerie -> RE: Lets here your best why I was not at work excuse, I just heard my best... (6/25/2009 1:19:10 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: ThatDamnedPanda

The best one i ever heard of, though, was the guy who forgot to bring the Sunday paper in off the porch on Sunday morning. On Monday morning, when he we was leaving for work, he found the Sunday paper on the porch. Assumed that this meant he was wrong about it being Monday, that this must actually be Sunday, and went back inside and spent the day lounging around on the couch reading the paper. Which raises the question of how anyone that stupid can even get a job in the first place.




Panda, actually with my horrible memory problem, I can see that as something I would do.
But this is why Im on mental disability I guess.  It comes with my condition.
There are things I cant remember from one day to the next. So yeah it could happen




catize -> RE: Lets here your best why I was not at work excuse, I just heard my best... (6/25/2009 2:00:26 PM)

I worked part time as the On-call Scheduler for a home health care agency.
I always knew which calls were going to be doozies when the staff calling in would start with “Ya know….”  I did not want to know but here are some things I heard anyway:
 
Ya know, I’m allergic to sausage.   We ordered pizza for dinner tonight and after I ate it I realized it was sausage instead of hamburger.  (My question:  How many pieces did you have to eat before you figured it out?)
 
Ya know, my car won’t start and I can’t find anyone to drive me to work.
(I said I’d drive her to work and she agreed.)  An hour later she called and said she had a family emergency and had to go out of town.  (My question: Are you taking the car that won’t start?)
 
Ya know, I have this hollow empty feeling.  I don’t think I can work tonight. (My question:  why don’t you eat something and see if that helps?)




thishereboi -> RE: Lets here your best why I was not at work excuse, I just heard my best... (6/25/2009 2:39:18 PM)

I used to work at a temporary staffing company. One day we got the following excuse on voice mail.

"I am sorry, but I am unable to come to work today. I am having a bowel movement this afternoon."

Swear to God....We never did figure out if he was just really anal about his bathroom habits or if he didn't understand what a bowel movement was.




thishereboi -> RE: Lets here your best why I was not at work excuse, I just heard my best... (6/25/2009 2:47:12 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: lronitulstahp

i knew a girl who said she'd used the excuse "I had an abortion" on a few different jobs.
Most HR people don't want to broach the subject...so they gave her the time she "needed".




I can see where that would work, but I wouldn't want everyone thinking I had one. I used to start by telling my boss I was having female issues. At that point he would always stop me and say he really didn't want to hear about it and he would see me when I was feeling better.




MysticFireTopaz -> RE: Lets here your best why I was not at work excuse, I just heard my best... (6/25/2009 6:00:25 PM)

I worked at one place in L.A., long before the era of cell phones, where my office mate had gone to Las Vegas for the weekend.  The hotel she was staying at offered a free long-distance call to anywhere in the U.S.  What she didn't realize was that there would be an announcement at the beginning of the call with the hotel name.  She placed her free call, thinking she was going to reach the boss and tell him she was sick (so she could really spend an extra day in Vegas.)  At the beginning of the phone call was a loud announcement that the call was from such-and-such hotel in Las Vegas, Nevada.  She became flustered and muttered something about having a dead battery and that she couldn't make it back to work until the next day.  He was totally not amused and called her into his office the next day for a private chat, but didn't fire her.  If she was supposed to be back on Monday, she should have realized she had the dead battery on Sunday sometime and had time to deal with it and be in the office on time.




rednicky -> RE: Lets here your best why I was not at work excuse, I just heard my best... (6/25/2009 6:59:29 PM)

Wow I'm surprised at how many people here are in charge and running the business. I'm going to look at every boss I have from now on differently. Might give them the eye [&o]




nevergrowdup -> RE: Lets here your best why I was not at work excuse, I just heard my best... (6/25/2009 8:13:54 PM)

We had a girl in the office who's grandfather died ... three times.




thishereboi -> RE: Lets here your best why I was not at work excuse, I just heard my best... (6/25/2009 8:35:53 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: nevergrowdup

We had a girl in the office who's grandfather died ... three times.


OK, I admit it, I killed my grandpa off at a couple of different jobs when I was young. I was never dumb enough to do it twice at the same company though. And he was already dead. Call me superstitious but I never say someone died unless they are already dead.

Oh and I don't do that anymore, if I want a day off, I just ask for it.




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