What do you consider to be the most important qualities of being a submissive? (Full Version)

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MistressLoving -> What do you consider to be the most important qualities of being a submissive? (6/25/2009 7:16:39 PM)

I know what I consider the top qualities, however, I'd like to hear from the subs out there as to what they consider the most important traits of a "good submissive".  This applies to those that consider themselves slaves as well.



LyraLaLaurie -> RE: What do you consider to be the most important qualities of being a submissive? (6/25/2009 7:46:25 PM)

1. Honesty

Yep.



beargonewild -> RE: What do you consider to be the most important qualities of being a submissive? (6/25/2009 8:00:24 PM)

Being human and true to ones self.



NihilusZero -> RE: What do you consider to be the most important qualities of being a submissive? (6/25/2009 8:08:20 PM)

  • Self-awareness
  • Devotion/Honor
  • Honesty
  • Lucidity



sweetsub1957 -> RE: What do you consider to be the most important qualities of being a submissive? (6/25/2009 8:08:22 PM)

I've done a lot of thinking about this in the past.

* Common decency
* Respect
* Ability to comunicate intelligently
* Honesty
* Love
* Integrity
* Intelligence
* Devotion
* Ambition
* Enthusiasm
* Accountability  
* Sincerity
* Obedience
* A Submissive Personality
* A Desire to Please and to Serve
* A Willingness to Surrender



kdsub -> RE: What do you consider to be the most important qualities of being a submissive? (6/25/2009 8:24:34 PM)

Good subs are those that make their partners feel dominate...even if they're not

Butch



Aileen1968 -> RE: What do you consider to be the most important qualities of being a submissive? (6/25/2009 8:33:37 PM)

I get his sense of humor and he gets mine.



DesFIP -> RE: What do you consider to be the most important qualities of being a submissive? (6/25/2009 8:36:28 PM)

Compatibility with the dominant.
Self awareness and honesty are essential to discovering if you are sufficiently compatible.



porcelaine -> RE: What do you consider to be the most important qualities of being a submissive? (6/25/2009 8:41:04 PM)

one that comes to the table with her life in order, a sense of self, respect and appreciation for the woman she proclaims to be, and the ability to stand and walk alone if necessary.

porcelaine



EmelineRose -> RE: What do you consider to be the most important qualities of being a submissive? (6/25/2009 8:51:09 PM)

Honesty - with themselves and their Dominant if they have one.  Without that you're building a house on sand, destined to crumble.

Of course self honesty is often difficult, painful - and revolutionary.  If the Dominant doesn't understand that, if he doesn't know how to react himself or reacts badly, especially egotistically, he will very possibly cause the submissive to create or offer a "pleasing" or PC fake persona.  In truth, only the person themself can decide whether they will take down the layers of shields within and reveal who they truly are but a really good Dominant can create an environment and interaction conductive to allowing it to happen.  (Of course the same is actually true in reverse).  This then becomes what I call a real relationship - between the "real" people.  IMHO if you want a deeply intimate, permanent, fulfilling and happy D/s relationship this kind of honesty is the cornerstone from which everything else necessary grows, especially trust.



Christinestill -> RE: What do you consider to be the most important qualities of being a submissive? (6/25/2009 8:54:59 PM)

the ability to choose the right dominant.



leadership527 -> RE: What do you consider to be the most important qualities of being a submissive? (6/25/2009 8:56:38 PM)

Heh, someone I love. Ideally also willing to submit.



MistressLoving -> RE: What do you consider to be the most important qualities of being a submissive? (6/25/2009 9:13:52 PM)

Honesty and trust are key key to the relationship between any sub and domme.  For a slave, I would say the same, as well as the ability to serve.  By serve, I mean placing the need to please the dominant above all else.  I think that is difficult for the most submissives and that is what separates a slave from a sub.  To have as your only mission, the desire to please your Mistress/Master, that is single focus and purpose of mind.  It is a trait most US based subs/slaves seem to struggle with.



cagliostro -> RE: What do you consider to be the most important qualities of being a submissive? (6/25/2009 9:14:38 PM)

Desire to be "a good submissive." Anything else can be learned. Submission is a skill, so desire to be good at it matters.



justme1980 -> RE: What do you consider to be the most important qualities of being a submissive? (6/25/2009 9:15:31 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: kdsub

Good subs are those that make their partners feel dominate...even if they're not

Butch



not bad, infact that was a damn good answer, Can I borrow that one???



AlchemicMelody -> RE: What do you consider to be the most important qualities of being a submissive? (6/25/2009 9:17:45 PM)

Desire to serve, trust, loyalty to the one they serve, and honesty. That's what I think at least.



Fitznicely -> RE: What do you consider to be the most important qualities of being a submissive? (6/25/2009 9:19:15 PM)

Complete, unquestioning obedience!

[sm=whip.gif]



porcelaine -> RE: What do you consider to be the most important qualities of being a submissive? (6/25/2009 9:22:50 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: MistressLoving

To have as your only mission, the desire to please your Mistress/Master, that is single focus and purpose of mind.  It is a trait most US based subs/slaves seem to struggle with.



i'm curious, why do you feel that is the case? is this in opposition to those in other cultures?

porcelaine



justme1980 -> RE: What do you consider to be the most important qualities of being a submissive? (6/25/2009 9:28:27 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: MistressLoving

I know what I consider the top qualities, however, I'd like to hear from the subs out there as to what they consider the most important traits of a "good submissive".  This applies to those that consider themselves slaves as well.


The slave must truly know themselves and their needs, not to be confused with wants. the slave needs to be able to give them self over 100%
The thought process is quite simple
Am what I am being asked to do going to be harmful To my mind body or soul or legally compromising
if the answer is no, they they need to be willing to do it
And all the basic characteristics that have already been brought up
The slave needs the smarts to pick a suitable MASTER ie if the dominant is a sadist the slave needs to a masochist



Mercnbeth -> RE: What do you consider to be the most important qualities of being a submissive? (6/25/2009 9:35:33 PM)

being submissive...similar to the most important quality a dominant posesses...being dominant. 



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