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Books on BDSM for Vanilla Family/Friends? - 6/26/2009 6:08:47 PM

sweetsub1957

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Okay, I've been kind of bitchy on the forums lately & ream me if you must, but here I am myself. My entire family is totally vanilla & my sister kept pushing for the name of the site I am on, so after two weeks of her nagging I told her.....to hopefully shut her up. Well she didn't shut up, she wanted me to elaborate so I tried to explain it. Now she's going bananas & I'm wondering if there's a good book I can give her which kind of explains WIITWD. I've heard of the one called "When Someone You Love is Kinky." Is that the best, or do you all recommend something else? Whatever I give her, I will of course read myself first.

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RE: Books on BDSM for Vanilla Family/Friends? - 6/26/2009 7:16:21 PM

porcelaine

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come hither by gloria brame is a very pleasant read.
http://www.amazon.com/Come-Hither-Commonsense-Guide-Kinky/dp/0684854627/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1246068927&sr=1-1

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RE: Books on BDSM for Vanilla Family/Friends? - 6/26/2009 8:07:32 PM

sweetsub1957

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Thanks.

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RE: Books on BDSM for Vanilla Family/Friends? - 6/27/2009 4:10:33 AM

MmeGigs

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quote:

ORIGINAL: sweetsub1957
I've heard of the one called "When Someone You Love is Kinky." Is that the best, or do you all recommend something else? Whatever I give her, I will of course read myself first.

"When Someone You Love Is Kinky" is excellent. I think it's the best choice for what you're trying to do. It was written specifically to explain kink to non-kinky people, and it does it in a very easy-to-understand, non-threatening and entertaining way. It's also a fairly short book, so folks are likely to actually read it.

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RE: Books on BDSM for Vanilla Family/Friends? - 6/27/2009 8:15:07 AM

thetammyjo

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quote:

ORIGINAL: MmeGigs

quote:

ORIGINAL: sweetsub1957
I've heard of the one called "When Someone You Love is Kinky." Is that the best, or do you all recommend something else? Whatever I give her, I will of course read myself first.

"When Someone You Love Is Kinky" is excellent. I think it's the best choice for what you're trying to do. It was written specifically to explain kink to non-kinky people, and it does it in a very easy-to-understand, non-threatening and entertaining way. It's also a fairly short book, so folks are likely to actually read it.

I have to second, third and fourth this suggestion and also say that you really should stay away from "scene books" at this level of introduction. "Come Hither" and other such books are NOT written for vanilla people, they are intended for those who know or think they may be kinky.

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RE: Books on BDSM for Vanilla Family/Friends? - 6/27/2009 8:32:36 AM

DarkSteven

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Gimme her phone number.

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RE: Books on BDSM for Vanilla Family/Friends? - 6/27/2009 8:51:49 AM

MarsBonfire

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I dunno... Is there a "BDSM for Dummies" book out there?

I know the "Good Vibrations Guide to Sex" has a pretty good chapter explaining the basics, but like most books on the market, is more oriented toward a "how-to" format.

Someone out there needs to write a "Heather's Mommy and Daddy Like to Play Mistress and Slave." Maybe we can get the next generation to be more at ease with the concept.

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RE: Books on BDSM for Vanilla Family/Friends? - 6/27/2009 9:41:51 AM

sweetsub1957

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quote:

ORIGINAL: DarkSteven

Gimme her phone number.

lmao Actually DarkSteven, she does need a good boyfriend. She lives in the Pacific Northwest, not far from me. She'd scheiss if she met a great guy & he turned out to be a Dom. She'd scheisss & I'd say "Right On!!" hahahaha

Also, thank you all for your answers.

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RE: Books on BDSM for Vanilla Family/Friends? - 6/27/2009 11:45:46 AM

DesFIP

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Why did you feel necessary to tell her where you go online? Why couldn't you stick to keeping your privacy?

Sorry, but if you had healthier boundaries you wouldn't have gotten yourself into this. And nilla forums or sex sites, I don't want my sister reading my posts. So here or gardenweb I keep my user name private and just say on a forum. If they pry I simply say I can't remember since I go to more than one.

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RE: Books on BDSM for Vanilla Family/Friends? - 6/27/2009 1:06:41 PM

sweetsub1957

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Actually I knew I would get burned on here for this. I expected it. I told her the name of the site"to hopefully shut her up." I was just pissed at her incessant nagging about it. I did not tell her my username so unless she went through a lot of profiles, she'd probably never find mine. I also knew the boundary issue would come up. I think maybe part of the reason I told her, too, was....if you don't REALLY want to know the answer, whatever it is, don't ask the question. Actually, this is tagged as a "BDSM Personals" site, even on computers where sex sites are "not allowed" to be viewed, I've been able to go right to collarme and log in. I checked just out of curiosity.

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RE: Books on BDSM for Vanilla Family/Friends? - 6/27/2009 2:05:32 PM

Born2BMasochist

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I guess I am kinda confused to the question. If a person is bombarding me with questions about it , why not question their motives. Is it that you wanted her to shut up because you were too embarassed to talk about what the lifestyle entails? Because you may have opened a can of worms which i understand, but she could be just as kinky as you. Also i found it interesting your response to Darksteven. Due to the fact of you stating her supposed vanillaness, but hooking the two of them up will bring her into the lifestyle. I wouldnt be so quick to judge she is vanilla and i would be looking more towards getting her to understand what its about. Also, wikipedia online if you put in BDSM, that gives the definition of the lifestyle and explains a lot. Sorry I rambled on and this is only my opinion. Take what you want and leave what you dont. That is the type of person I am.

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RE: Books on BDSM for Vanilla Family/Friends? - 6/27/2009 6:43:29 PM

sweetsub1957

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No, I'm not embarrassed about my lifestyle, I just am tired of her trying to Dominate me. She has a VERY Dominant personality and she thinks she knows what is best for me. She is my older sister & I guess she just can't wrap her mind around the fact that I can take care of myself now. I guess she could be just as kinky as I am, but on the other side of the kneel. It could also be a case of thou doth protest too much. I'm not exactly sure where her mind is at but, when I told her the little bit I did tell her hoping to shut her up, she wanted to know more. She was curious. OMG! I wonder if she is kinky? hahaha

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