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Things that need to be invented - 6/28/2009 4:18:45 PM

PeonForHer

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I don't know if a thread's been done on this recently, but anyone who thinks I shouldn't start one can feck off.

First thoughts:

1) A car horn that, instead of making a hooting sound, says in a barking British upper class voice, "Oh DO COME ALONG!" Think James Robertson Justice in the old Ealing Comedies.

2) A spring-loaded gadget to be worn in the trousers with a remote-control. If a fanciable woman walks by, you press the button secretly, and you immediately get a giant trouser-tent accompanied by a noise that goes "byyyy-yoing!"

3) A cardboard Houses of Parliament, made cheaply, in various sizes. Come Guy Fawkes night, a much better and more appropriate thing to burn than an effigy of Mr Fawkes.

4) Various USB devices that can be connected to parts of the anatomy. So that those having D/s internet sex can control what's happening to the person at the other end.

I shall be awarding points and eventually, a lovely little cake to the winner, for ideas that match or beat the above.

< Message edited by PeonForHer -- 6/28/2009 4:20:15 PM >

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RE: Things that need to be invented - 6/28/2009 4:32:42 PM

SteelofUtah

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1) A cell phone that you can program to leave a message to the person calling you that does not go to your voice mail just a message that it would play for them and then hang up on them. "Hi, This is Steel, I know that you want to talk to me but I would rather eat cork board Tacks than talk to you right know. I know you want to talk to me so when I feel like bashing my head against a wall...I'll call you."

2) Porn that already plays in Fast Forward so you can go even Faster through the story line than you can now and making it without sound should make it less expensive.

3) A Remote control that every time you push a button it automatically programs itself to the equipment within range so you don't have to reprogram everything when you change batteries.

4) Pussy Scented Hand Soap. I know I like the smell and for hours after try to catch the scent when my hand comes near my face. I figure if you made a hand soap that smelled LIGITIMANTLY like pussy men the world over would buy it. And Women too.

5) A way to record the TV shows we like to watch WITHOUT the commercials.

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RE: Things that need to be invented - 6/28/2009 4:42:30 PM

Venatrix

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quote:

ORIGINAL: PeonForHer

3) A cardboard Houses of Parliament, made cheaply, in various sizes. Come Guy Fawkes night, a much better and more appropriate thing to burn than an effigy of Mr Fawkes.

Only if it comes complete with a figure of Michael Martin, a miniature duck house, and a moat that needs cleaning.

For my part, I always wanted an LED-lit screen on the back of my car that I could programme by voice, which would flash messages at attractive men driving behind me, such as, "If you like being tied up and sodomised, follow me."

Edited to add: I really hate to admit this, but you've started some good threads lately, PforH.

< Message edited by Venatrix -- 6/28/2009 4:45:03 PM >

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RE: Things that need to be invented - 6/28/2009 4:47:30 PM

LookieNoNookie

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quote:

ORIGINAL: PeonForHer

I don't know if a thread's been done on this recently, but anyone who thinks I shouldn't start one can feck off.

First thoughts:

1) A car horn that, instead of making a hooting sound, says in a barking British upper class voice, "Oh DO COME ALONG!" Think James Robertson Justice in the old Ealing Comedies.

2) A spring-loaded gadget to be worn in the trousers with a remote-control. If a fanciable woman walks by, you press the button secretly, and you immediately get a giant trouser-tent accompanied by a noise that goes "byyyy-yoing!"

3) A cardboard Houses of Parliament, made cheaply, in various sizes. Come Guy Fawkes night, a much better and more appropriate thing to burn than an effigy of Mr Fawkes.

4) Various USB devices that can be connected to parts of the anatomy. So that those having D/s internet sex can control what's happening to the person at the other end.

I shall be awarding points and eventually, a lovely little cake to the winner, for ideas that match or beat the above.

Already done.

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RE: Things that need to be invented - 6/28/2009 4:49:11 PM

LookieNoNookie

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quote:

A Remote control that every time you push a button it automatically programs itself to the equipment within range so you don't have to reprogram everything when you change batteries.

LOVE THAT!!!!!!

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RE: Things that need to be invented - 6/28/2009 5:22:50 PM

jester51

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A board game , catch Osama bin laden !

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RE: Things that need to be invented - 6/28/2009 5:46:54 PM

Aylee

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Socks with built in GPS so that not only can you LOCATE all socks that need to be washed, but (magnetically) mate themselves in the dryer.

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RE: Things that need to be invented - 6/28/2009 6:10:45 PM

CatdeMedici

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A delete key that really deletes

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RE: Things that need to be invented - 6/28/2009 6:42:21 PM

PyrotheClown

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quote:

ORIGINAL: LookieNoNookie

quote:

ORIGINAL: PeonForHer

I don't know if a thread's been done on this recently, but anyone who thinks I shouldn't start one can feck off.

First thoughts:

1) A car horn that, instead of making a hooting sound, says in a barking British upper class voice, "Oh DO COME ALONG!" Think James Robertson Justice in the old Ealing Comedies.

2) A spring-loaded gadget to be worn in the trousers with a remote-control. If a fanciable woman walks by, you press the button secretly, and you immediately get a giant trouser-tent accompanied by a noise that goes "byyyy-yoing!"

3) A cardboard Houses of Parliament, made cheaply, in various sizes. Come Guy Fawkes night, a much better and more appropriate thing to burn than an effigy of Mr Fawkes.

4) Various USB devices that can be connected to parts of the anatomy. So that those having D/s internet sex can control what's happening to the person at the other end.

I shall be awarding points and eventually, a lovely little cake to the winner, for ideas that match or beat the above.

Already done.

yeah, I was about to mention that, saw one of the "Devices" at the museum of sex in nyc...

crazy looking gizmo

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RE: Things that need to be invented - 6/28/2009 6:44:02 PM

PyrotheClown

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quote:

ORIGINAL: jester51

A board game , catch Osama bin laden !

well, it would start out as catch osama bin laden, but the moment you get half way around the board, you flip it over with all the pieces and you play "IRAQ"!

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RE: Things that need to be invented - 6/28/2009 6:48:20 PM

PyrotheClown

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quote:

1) A car horn that, instead of making a hooting sound, says in a barking British upper class voice, "Oh DO COME ALONG!" Think James Robertson Justice in the old Ealing Comedies.

I'd settle for a giant electronic sign mounted to the top of my car

"Pull over to the right lane, thank you"
"get the fuck off my ass!"
"Shove your cell phone up your ass and start driving"
"Please......DIE"

and possibly one of those hydraulic lifts that garbage trucks use that could lift the car ahead of you and gently place them behind you

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RE: Things that need to be invented - 6/28/2009 7:38:46 PM

intenze

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for Kevin: A Wank O' Matic that has a blow up Domme, boots, a 12 pack of soda for throwing on her, and some change so he can take her cab!

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RE: Things that need to be invented - 6/28/2009 8:08:13 PM

Venatrix

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quote:

ORIGINAL: intenze

for Kevin: A Wank O' Matic that has a blow up Domme, boots, a 12 pack of soda for throwing on her, and some change so he can take her cab!

And a miniature employment tribunal so he can lodge a complaint about being sacked by her.

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RE: Things that need to be invented - 6/28/2009 8:12:24 PM

girlygurl

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A secret "zero balance" code for credit cards.