|
CNJDom -> RE: my wife says she doesnt want to be bound all the time, (7/17/2009 3:25:13 AM)
|
Overfiend: it's understandable that between the role-play and such that you can't always be certain when she's in or out of that mode. And the situation is that she gets wet at times and not at others but doesn't let on until it's too late, even though you use lube when you think it's needed. And then you feel bad as she heals, though she refuses and / or makes excuses about going to a doctor.
You are the Dominant. Take control of this situation. Firstly drag her ass to the doctor, by not letting her go by herself and taking her there. This will take some of the guesswork out of this dilemma. Secondly, it's good you keep the lube handy...use it everytime. You are in control of the lube, so whether she's wet or not; YOU control the environment (being her orafice and therein), and the setting (moisture). You can let her know that this is what is going to happen (out of her control), because even though you are a thoughtful and considerate person, you are not in control here....she is on a certain level. I'm not going to accuse her of the old "topping from the bottom" thing, but the role-play and the reality is not in controlled, and you don't know when it's happening. She let's you know when it's real. It's not good to be the Dominant and the last to know about something like that.
Bondage: Being tied up is one way to restrain. Mental bondage is another. Also a suggestion since I don't know your play style, would be perhaps trying resistence play. There are these restraints with elastic bands on them. Strap her into these where she's restrainted with room to struggle, and wiggle. You can have fun with this as much as she can. She helpless and still bound, but with limited mobility. It'll be a little frustrating for her if she likes total immobility, but you can incorporate that in some role-play or variance of your normal play. Also look into tying her in different ways. If it's just on the bed, then try other furniture for a difference. You can also use bondage as foreplay...hogtie her and have fun before you let her "loose" or put her into another more suitable position of restraint.
But above all else, take charge. Control this environment. Being bound by another is being controlled by another. She likes that. She may not crave the rope always, but take a good look at the metaphore of control here. Rope is just the physical aspect of control, and that you both have. What about the mental or emotional aspect of control? And if making her wet is the goal here (and she's aroused but not so wet), then tuning up the mental aspect, as well as getting the physical aspect ruled out (by seeing a doctor no matter why she thinks otherwise it's important) is crucial. Side note: You could "cut her off" until she sees a doctor, but make her make that appointment, and take her there. Good luck.
|
|
|
|
